1 0:00:00,221 --> 0:00:04,212 Speaker 1: Allow yourself to feel what you're feeling through a different perspective. 2 0:00:04,941 --> 0:00:19,934 Speaker 1: Allow your thoughts to occur, knowing that actually, what's happening is a deeper level of self-awareness that you have in your life and a deeper level of external awareness, and that the mind is always going to try to tell you that you're not doing enough, that you need to do more, that there's something wrong with you. 3 0:00:21,000 --> 0:00:22,524 Speaker 1: Welcome to a Changed Mind. 4 0:00:22,985 --> 0:00:40,231 Speaker 1: A journey into the topics that matter to you most, from the neuroscience and spirituality of mindset and personal growth to groundbreaking strategies for health, wealth and relationships, to open and honest conversations about pressing global issues such as the environment, censorship, corporate capture and democracy. 5 0:00:40,861 --> 0:00:52,071 Speaker 1: Each and every episode reminds us of the certainty of the goodness of the future and provides the teachings, tools and timeless wisdom inspiring you to create real, lasting change in your life and in the world. 6 0:00:52,521 --> 0:01:05,591 Speaker 1: If you've been desiring a sanctuary for your spirit, a place to go to tune out the distraction, negativity and doom and gloom, so that you can tap into the deep power, the vibrancy and the potential you have inside, you're in the right place. 7 0:01:06,260 --> 0:01:08,509 Speaker 1: Welcome to a Changed Mind. 8 0:01:10,601 --> 0:01:11,225 Speaker 1: Hey, it's David. 9 0:01:11,345 --> 0:01:13,900 Speaker 1: Welcome back to a Changed Mind. 10 0:01:14,081 --> 0:01:15,908 Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be here with you today. 11 0:01:16,081 --> 0:01:32,493 Speaker 1: I am really looking forward to tackling this issue, this misconception that has become a thorn in our side, a stone in our shoes, this idea that there is something wrong with us and that we are somehow broken. 12 0:01:33,121 --> 0:01:44,480 Speaker 1: I don't know about you, but I've spent far too much time in my life with that inner chatter, that voice in my head telling me that there's something wrong with me, comparing myself to other people, feeling like I'm not good enough. 13 0:01:44,661 --> 0:01:50,950 Speaker 1: And on today's episode, we're going to dive deep into that misunderstanding so that we can see the truth. 14 0:01:51,220 --> 0:01:57,847 Speaker 1: And this is part of what I want to create for you here each and every episode a sanctuary for the human spirit. 15 0:01:58,381 --> 0:02:00,268 Speaker 1: I love the fact that we can be here together. 16 0:02:00,801 --> 0:02:07,472 Speaker 1: And, man, we've been on a tear of some pretty amazing episodes going through money, going through anxiety, going through how thoughts become things. 17 0:02:07,532 --> 0:02:17,747 Speaker 1: A fantastic episode, an interview with my lovely wife, the Carol Gutierrez Bayer, who has been a co-creative partner of mine in this journey. 18 0:02:17,961 --> 0:02:19,567 Speaker 1: If this is your first episode, welcome. 19 0:02:19,860 --> 0:02:28,012 Speaker 1: If you've listened to some other episodes, get ready for another good one and do me a favor if you're listening on the podcast, no matter what platform you're on. 20 0:02:28,160 --> 0:02:30,835 Speaker 1: Please, please, please, give us a review. 21 0:02:31,157 --> 0:02:32,386 Speaker 1: Leave a comment, if you can. 22 0:02:32,468 --> 0:02:33,319 Speaker 1: I read all of them. 23 0:02:33,419 --> 0:02:36,874 Speaker 1: If you're joining us on YouTube, subscribe to the channel. 24 0:02:37,256 --> 0:02:38,160 Speaker 1: Leave me a comment. 25 0:02:38,361 --> 0:02:46,972 Speaker 1: I want to know what you think about these episodes and what other topics you want me to cover, as well as questions you have about the themes that we discuss. 26 0:02:47,240 --> 0:03:11,004 Speaker 1: And, as I mentioned, today, we're going to be discussing this heart-aching, gut-wrenching idea that we have that we are not good enough or that there is something wrong with us, and I want to start off by saying because I don't even enjoy starting out one of our episodes with this type of energy that you are absolutely, 100%, exactly who you need to be and where you need to be right now. 27 0:03:11,621 --> 0:03:43,747 Speaker 1: There is nothing wrong with you, and what we're going to be diving into is this idea that the mind, which gives a meaning to every experience your mind will even have thoughts about the thoughts that you have has a slant towards survival, and so there's constant judgment, there's a hypervigilant scanning of yourself and your life around you, and it materializes or manifests in the form of this idea that we're missing something, and you're not missing anything at all. 28 0:03:44,140 --> 0:03:51,639 Speaker 1: In fact, you're going to see this theme that we talked about in episode three, where there really are no problems. 29 0:03:51,820 --> 0:03:58,834 Speaker 1: There is nothing that you need to figure out or become in order to do more, be more, feel more. 30 0:03:59,161 --> 0:04:13,740 Speaker 1: It's really just about identifying what I would call the unintelligent ideas, the resistance, the limiting beliefs, and eliminating them, letting them go, transferring them using the tools and technologies that we share on these episodes and in our coaching programs. 31 0:04:13,901 --> 0:04:16,080 Speaker 1: And so we're going to get into this topic. 32 0:04:16,180 --> 0:04:29,660 Speaker 1: And it really came up for me when I was having a recent enrollment conversation into my private mentorship program with someone I spoke at an event and there were a number of people who were interested in seeing how they could get into our programs and handful them, wanted to work directly with me. 33 0:04:30,506 --> 0:04:32,460 Speaker 1: And this individual said hey, listen, you know what? 34 0:04:33,223 --> 0:04:37,600 Speaker 1: I need your help and I'm going to need your best coach because I'm really broken. 35 0:04:38,966 --> 0:04:40,960 Speaker 1: And I was like what do you mean by you're really broken? 36 0:04:41,985 --> 0:04:44,720 Speaker 1: And he's like well, I just, I know I'm carrying a lot of baggage. 37 0:04:45,985 --> 0:04:53,111 Speaker 1: There's so much I need to heal, there's so much I'm not aware of, there's so much I need to do. 38 0:04:54,505 --> 0:04:58,400 Speaker 1: And I stopped him and said Listen, like what if there wasn't so much you needed to do? 39 0:04:59,202 --> 0:05:06,054 Speaker 1: What if this was just an idea that you have, that somehow you're far away from your wholeness, but you're really not. 40 0:05:06,206 --> 0:05:15,080 Speaker 1: In episode number five I believe it was when I spoke about anxiety, I talked about how anxiety is actually a healing mechanism. 41 0:05:15,100 --> 0:05:34,320 Speaker 1: Right, anxiety is a process of alleviating ourselves of dissonant energy, and we've learned to want to kill anxiety or suppress anxiety, and that that makes no sense when you understand that anxiety is the body's response to overload, similar to a fever, and so when we have a fever, we allow the fever to take place. 42 0:05:35,184 --> 0:05:38,640 Speaker 1: There's this immunological response and we allow it. 43 0:05:38,640 --> 0:05:44,873 Speaker 1: And I was like, what if you could just allow yourself to be in the space you're in right now, rather than resisting it? 44 0:05:46,045 --> 0:05:52,073 Speaker 1: What if you could just realize that you're in a healing process, that there's another level of self-awareness that you have now. 45 0:05:52,093 --> 0:05:58,860 Speaker 1: You're now aware of Of the things that you think or the things that you feel that don't feel right. 46 0:05:58,940 --> 0:06:10,865 Speaker 1: You're aware of different aspects of your life that you want to change and, rather than allowing your mind to direct its focus inward in self-judgment, what if you could just allow it? 47 0:06:11,263 --> 0:06:12,720 Speaker 1: And so that's what we're going to be talking about today. 48 0:06:12,962 --> 0:06:14,880 Speaker 1: Again, there's there's no real magic to this. 49 0:06:15,101 --> 0:06:16,587 Speaker 1: There's no hustle and grind. 50 0:06:17,041 --> 0:06:23,207 Speaker 1: There's just approaching the experience that you're having of yourself, in this case, that you're somehow not good enough or that you're broken. 51 0:06:23,809 --> 0:06:28,570 Speaker 1: Through a new lens, and oftentimes you'll see this same solution. 52 0:06:29,081 --> 0:06:33,052 Speaker 1: Allow yourself to feel what you're feeling through a different perspective. 53 0:06:33,781 --> 0:06:48,720 Speaker 1: Allow your thoughts to occur, knowing that actually what's happening is a deeper level of self-awareness that you have in your life and a deeper level of external awareness, and that the mind is always going to try to tell you that you're not doing enough, that you need to do more, that there's something wrong with you. 54 0:06:49,702 --> 0:06:54,755 Speaker 1: And I start out by sharing my own story around this Pre-personal development. 55 0:06:55,096 --> 0:07:07,973 Speaker 1: Pre my 12 step recovery 20 years ago, I was a quote unquote successful entrepreneur, running investor, backed technology companies, always feeling like there was something wrong with me and that I was broken. 56 0:07:09,211 --> 0:07:15,095 Speaker 1: And at the early stages of my story I just shut that voice down by saying well, I'll just go achieve more. 57 0:07:16,030 --> 0:07:39,061 Speaker 1: If I can actually go do more, achieve more, succeed more, make more money, build bigger businesses, have more girlfriends, drive more fancy cars, whatever it looks like then I'll get to a point where I can justify this idea that there's nothing wrong with me, I'm successful, I'm good enough, but, as I learned very quickly, new level, new devil right. 58 0:07:39,210 --> 0:07:53,134 Speaker 1: Every time you get to some new level of success, if you're utilizing that as evidence for your own self love, you're always gonna find other people who have more, and so you end up getting entangled with this more monster and it burns you out. 59 0:07:54,411 --> 0:08:04,398 Speaker 1: Or you may be different than I was and you're like hey, dave, I haven't had the level of success that you created in your businesses and, by the way, I had two businesses that went bankrupt. 60 0:08:04,830 --> 0:08:28,399 Speaker 1: I was paying myself an average salary, and one of them it sounds a lot fancier than it actually was and you're saying like, look, I feel anxious on a daily basis, or I'm depressed, or I'm having a hard time making ends meet, paying my bills, I'm struggling with a health challenge, I've been alone and I wanna have a partner, and so there's a lot that's missing in my life. 61 0:08:28,510 --> 0:08:36,455 Speaker 1: And what I'm trying to express to you is that there may be things that you wanna change, but that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. 62 0:08:37,390 --> 0:08:50,237 Speaker 1: There was a lot that I wanted to change in my life way back then, but I was interpreting it as there was something wrong with me and the challenge with believing that you're somehow broken and let's just stop for a second like what does that even mean? 63 0:08:50,471 --> 0:08:51,060 Speaker 1: What do you mean broken? 64 0:08:51,710 --> 0:08:56,300 Speaker 1: You're not broken, right, you function as a human being, as a member of this species. 65 0:08:57,670 --> 0:09:00,676 Speaker 1: It's good to question some of these concepts Like what do we mean by broken? 66 0:09:00,970 --> 0:09:05,338 Speaker 1: Okay, well, like, there are changes that I've been wanting to make, that I've been having some challenges making. 67 0:09:05,590 --> 0:09:06,854 Speaker 1: Okay, well, that doesn't mean broken. 68 0:09:07,436 --> 0:09:08,420 Speaker 1: Well, what does broken mean? 69 0:09:08,510 --> 0:09:12,356 Speaker 1: Well, broken means that I've been in a prolonged emotional state that doesn't feel good. 70 0:09:12,490 --> 0:09:14,899 Speaker 1: Okay, but that's a prolonged emotional state that doesn't feel good. 71 0:09:15,110 --> 0:09:15,760 Speaker 1: That doesn't mean you're broken. 72 0:09:16,450 --> 0:09:18,076 Speaker 1: Like, I've gone through both of those things. 73 0:09:19,230 --> 0:09:23,115 Speaker 1: Well, you know, I haven't been able to hold down a relationship or a job. 74 0:09:23,230 --> 0:09:34,976 Speaker 1: There's something wrong with me, no, no, no, that just means that you haven't yet figured out what you need to do, or to be in a job that is in alignment with you, or to attract a relationship. 75 0:09:35,110 --> 0:09:36,075 Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with you. 76 0:09:37,150 --> 0:09:42,277 Speaker 1: And the problem with believing that there's something wrong with us is that your brain is a goal achieving machine. 77 0:09:42,710 --> 0:09:43,875 Speaker 1: You know, we've talked about this before. 78 0:09:44,010 --> 0:09:51,576 Speaker 1: What you believe is what you think on a moment by moment basis and you start to find evidence for the belief that you have. 79 0:09:52,310 --> 0:10:07,658 Speaker 1: And so if you believe that there's something wrong with you or that you're broken, essentially, you're gonna pay attention to all the evidence that supports that belief and you're gonna ignore everything that you're doing well that indicates that you're not broken the fact that you got up today, you brushed your teeth. 80 0:10:08,210 --> 0:10:12,596 Speaker 1: Maybe you made your bed that's something I learned more recently under the tutelage of my wife. 81 0:10:13,794 --> 0:10:15,935 Speaker 1: Right, you breathed today. 82 0:10:17,010 --> 0:10:18,536 Speaker 1: Maybe you ate something. 83 0:10:19,178 --> 0:10:21,015 Speaker 1: Right, there's nothing wrong with you. 84 0:10:22,110 --> 0:10:33,138 Speaker 1: But if you believe that there's something wrong with you, you're gonna just start to notice all of the evidence that supports it and you're gonna ignore all of the evidence that is counter positioned to that. 85 0:10:34,210 --> 0:10:40,580 Speaker 1: And so then you're gonna have thoughts and perceptions that you're broken or you're doing something wrong or you're not good enough. 86 0:10:40,750 --> 0:10:47,539 Speaker 1: And then you're gonna feel these emotions that aren't conducive to creating change in your life stress, depression, anxiety, whatever it is you think. 87 0:10:47,670 --> 0:10:54,577 Speaker 1: You then experience that thought as an emotion and then your emotions determine what action you do or do not take. 88 0:10:54,710 --> 0:11:08,336 Speaker 1: So you end up being in a place of lethargy, you end up being in a place of inaction, you end up being in a place of not taking care of yourself, and so then you get results, and those results just reinforce the belief. 89 0:11:08,416 --> 0:11:10,141 Speaker 1: See, I'm broken, there's something wrong with me. 90 0:11:10,290 --> 0:11:12,518 Speaker 1: I don't know how to do it right. 91 0:11:12,810 --> 0:11:21,435 Speaker 1: So let's reorient ourselves to this unhealthy loop that we get into and let's really take a look at what's going on in your life right now. 92 0:11:22,130 --> 0:11:27,641 Speaker 1: And again, I don't know what's going on in your life right now at a specific level, right? 93 0:11:27,810 --> 0:11:29,778 Speaker 1: I don't know if you're having relationship challenges. 94 0:11:29,870 --> 0:11:31,397 Speaker 1: I don't know if you're feeling depressed. 95 0:11:31,490 --> 0:11:37,396 Speaker 1: I don't know if you're in drug or alcohol or pornography abuse, or if you're feeling or being codependent. 96 0:11:37,510 --> 0:11:52,315 Speaker 1: I don't know if you've got a job that you don't love, but wherever you are, this experience that you're having right now of noticing that there are some things that you want to change is really to be celebrated. 97 0:11:53,330 --> 0:11:58,412 Speaker 1: What's true is number one you're more self-aware than you used to be. 98 0:11:59,310 --> 0:12:06,174 Speaker 1: You're getting more and more aware of what you want and what you don't want, and that's the first step, isn't it? 99 0:12:07,710 --> 0:12:24,778 Speaker 1: Before you can create any type of change in your life, you have to be aware of the change that you want to create, and I don't know why, but the way this reality has unfolded the way higher power, infinite intelligence, god, jesus, allah, structured this whole thing. 100 0:12:25,550 --> 0:12:35,155 Speaker 1: The force, the universe, is that we experience what we don't like and that helps us get clear on what we do like. 101 0:12:36,290 --> 0:12:51,279 Speaker 1: And so I want you to think about these things in your life that you're using as evidence to support this false idea that there's something wrong with you, because what you'll find is whatever it is. 102 0:12:51,910 --> 0:13:11,400 Speaker 1: Even in my case, in the depth of my addiction, abusing pornography on a daily basis, being in unhealthy relationships, being addicted to drugs, abusing alcohol, being depressed, feeling anxiety without giving that a meaning all that really is is experiences I had. 103 0:13:11,510 --> 0:13:13,938 Speaker 1: That helped me get clear on the life that I do want. 104 0:13:14,810 --> 0:13:16,617 Speaker 1: I don't want to feel anxious, I want to feel calm. 105 0:13:16,710 --> 0:13:17,714 Speaker 1: I don't want to feel depressed. 106 0:13:18,410 --> 0:13:20,378 Speaker 1: I'd like to have more happiness in my life. 107 0:13:20,470 --> 0:13:22,878 Speaker 1: I don't want to be compulsively addicted to substances. 108 0:13:23,750 --> 0:13:31,255 Speaker 1: I want to be connected to spirit and to other people and having the freedom to make choice in my life and to pursue my passions. 109 0:13:32,570 --> 0:13:37,840 Speaker 1: So everything that's going on in your life right now is not an indicator that there's something wrong with you. 110 0:13:38,190 --> 0:13:40,518 Speaker 1: That's what the mind is trying to convince you of. 111 0:13:40,810 --> 0:13:52,495 Speaker 1: The mind believes that this is the way to motivate you to change, but clearly it's not right, because it just continues to make you feel worse and worse and worse and perpetuate these experiences that you don't prefer. 112 0:13:54,122 --> 0:14:05,164 Speaker 1: But your higher self, you aware that your mind is doing this you can now know that all that's happening is you're in this journey of your life, the hero's journey. 113 0:14:05,184 --> 0:14:06,976 Speaker 1: You're having all kinds of experiences. 114 0:14:06,996 --> 0:14:23,494 Speaker 1: You're going through a chapter, maybe it's been an entire book, maybe it's been a series, right, maybe it's been a while of experiencing things that you don't like, but that is the process by which we get clear on the opposite, what we do want right. 115 0:14:24,697 --> 0:14:37,022 Speaker 1: So what we're trying to establish in this conversation is that this belief that there's something wrong with you or that you're broken is false, so that you can let it go. 116 0:14:37,645 --> 0:14:41,863 Speaker 1: What I'm wanting to encourage you to see is that there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. 117 0:14:42,165 --> 0:14:44,755 Speaker 1: You're in a normal developmental process. 118 0:14:45,398 --> 0:15:13,494 Speaker 1: Sometimes it takes months or years or decades, and there's an opportunity for you to retire the meaning that you're giving to this experience that there's something wrong with you or you're not doing enough or you're broken and give a new meaning, which is, I'm now clear, or more than ever on the things that I've been experiencing, that I don't like, that I don't prefer, and that is helping me get clear, or more than ever before, on what I do want. 119 0:15:13,935 --> 0:15:23,023 Speaker 1: Right, and so you're in this beautiful process of change and the only challenge is that the mind is giving it a meaning that's not true. 120 0:15:24,005 --> 0:15:35,301 Speaker 1: So you're growing in your awareness, you're growing in your preference, and this starts to build momentum in that direction, if you allow it to. 121 0:15:36,082 --> 0:15:53,127 Speaker 1: But what prevents that momentum is by buying into this mental imagination or idea that there's something wrong with you that stops the momentum that I'm going to continue explaining to you and keeps you sort of stuck at the starting point. 122 0:15:53,909 --> 0:15:55,054 Speaker 1: Okay, so that's number one. 123 0:15:55,355 --> 0:15:57,223 Speaker 1: You're growing in your awareness. 124 0:15:57,504 --> 0:16:02,446 Speaker 1: You're clear, now more than ever before, about what you don't want and therefore what you do want. 125 0:16:02,807 --> 0:16:05,075 Speaker 1: Good on you In there. 126 0:16:05,315 --> 0:16:08,925 Speaker 1: There ain't anything about you not being good enough or being broken. 127 0:16:09,948 --> 0:16:17,888 Speaker 1: Number two what you're experiencing right now very much what I like, what I talked about in in episode five, the anxiety episode is a healing process. 128 0:16:18,692 --> 0:16:23,129 Speaker 1: So a lot of these thoughts and these emotions have been buried deep inside of you. 129 0:16:23,511 --> 0:16:29,813 Speaker 1: They were trauma that we all experienced, all of us, when we were children. 130 0:16:30,416 --> 0:16:32,442 Speaker 1: They were misunderstandings, misbeliefs. 131 0:16:33,064 --> 0:16:43,345 Speaker 1: That life needs to be hard, that you have to work hard to make money, that there's not enough time, that we need to please other people if we're gonna be loved by others. 132 0:16:44,327 --> 0:16:55,365 Speaker 1: All of these core beliefs have accumulated an energy and attention in your system, and so this is all coming out in the form of thoughts and emotions. 133 0:16:55,493 --> 0:16:57,649 Speaker 1: No one ever really explains that to us. 134 0:16:57,777 --> 0:17:02,924 Speaker 1: No one ever says hey, you know, these negative thoughts that you're having are actually a healing process. 135 0:17:03,326 --> 0:17:04,249 Speaker 1: Just allow them. 136 0:17:04,691 --> 0:17:06,839 Speaker 1: You don't have to buy into them, right. 137 0:17:06,979 --> 0:17:12,521 Speaker 1: Buy into the idea that you're now closer, now more than ever before, to changing your life. 138 0:17:13,545 --> 0:17:27,955 Speaker 1: These emotions that you're having there's nothing wrong with you that you're feeling emotions that we would call depressed or anxious, or stressed or angry, or overwhelmed, or bored or lonely no, no, no. 139 0:17:28,697 --> 0:17:31,387 Speaker 1: Those are emotions that have been in you a long, long time. 140 0:17:31,447 --> 0:17:41,887 Speaker 1: They're probably emotional habits you adopted at some level from your parents, and you know now we have these external pressures that we didn't have 20, 30, 40 years ago. 141 0:17:41,977 --> 0:18:01,395 Speaker 1: Right, you've got all of this information coming in through social media and digital connectivity, and so it can feel overwhelming, and so the key is to disconnect from those things that are causing us overwhelm and allow the overwhelm to pass, allow the fever to break, allow the immunological response to take place in your body. 142 0:18:02,419 --> 0:18:19,616 Speaker 1: So we're not trying to get away from any of these thoughts or emotions, but we're experiencing them differently, not giving them a meaning that there's something wrong with you because you have these thoughts and emotions, but saying, hey, I am aware that this is in me and I'm going to allow these thoughts and emotions to be released from me. 143 0:18:20,037 --> 0:18:22,160 Speaker 1: That's what your body's trying to do. 144 0:18:22,180 --> 0:18:36,741 Speaker 1: And as you no longer resist these thoughts and emotions because of the misperception that you're broken and there's something wrong with you, what happens over time is that those patterns or habits of thought and emotion less and less and less and less. 145 0:18:36,781 --> 0:18:48,224 Speaker 1: And as you allow them, rather than trying to resist them because you think that they're part of the problem, you can start to become more thoughtful about them. 146 0:18:48,425 --> 0:19:08,492 Speaker 1: You can evaluate them, you can take a look at some of these thoughts and ideas and question them, and what you'll often find is that when you, for example, journal out the thoughts that you're thinking and the emotions that you're having, you have an ability to reprocess them through a more intelligent lens, through a lens that basically says oh you know, I don't. 147 0:19:08,552 --> 0:19:11,749 Speaker 1: I don't know that that's true, that I don't do anything right? 148 0:19:11,990 --> 0:19:15,910 Speaker 1: I mean, here's a long list of things that I do do, right, I don't know that that's true. 149 0:19:16,411 --> 0:19:18,389 Speaker 1: That nobody likes me, right? 150 0:19:18,449 --> 0:19:22,950 Speaker 1: When I'm in the Starbucks line and I get to the front, the barista seems pretty friendly with me. 151 0:19:23,392 --> 0:19:25,581 Speaker 1: Oh well, but that's just her job or his job. 152 0:19:26,183 --> 0:19:30,496 Speaker 1: No, I think by default, we all pretty much like each other. 153 0:19:31,038 --> 0:19:41,100 Speaker 1: There's probably a handful of instances that you may have interpreted like I did, where someone didn't like me and now we've sort of generalized that as to nobody likes me. 154 0:19:41,862 --> 0:20:02,710 Speaker 1: So when you realize that there's nothing wrong with you, right, that you're in a process of growing in self-awareness, that these thoughts and emotions that you're having are normal, you can now have some space because you're no longer trying to destroy them in order to be good enough or have nothing wrong with you, and now you can start to question these thoughts, right? 155 0:20:02,810 --> 0:20:10,843 Speaker 1: One of the deepest philosophical encouragements was over the temple of Adelphi that said no thyself, right? 156 0:20:10,924 --> 0:20:18,616 Speaker 1: We can't know ourselves if we're trying to stop the emotions and thoughts we're having, which are just part of our healing process. 157 0:20:18,636 --> 0:20:19,843 Speaker 1: So that's number two. 158 0:20:20,165 --> 0:20:24,945 Speaker 1: Just know that the way that you're feeling and the way that you're thinking totally normal I mean. 159 0:20:24,965 --> 0:20:42,242 Speaker 1: I went through decades of this and this eased up significantly when I stopped resisting it right, when I got into my spiritual practice, when I started doing the work that we've been doing together and understanding the concepts that I'm sharing with you over the course of these episodes. 160 0:20:42,823 --> 0:20:49,373 Speaker 1: Right, this is how you transition into allowing whole human healing, returning to your whole self. 161 0:20:49,876 --> 0:20:52,066 Speaker 1: And that doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you right now. 162 0:20:53,150 --> 0:20:53,551 Speaker 1: There isn't. 163 0:20:53,932 --> 0:21:03,382 Speaker 1: You're just in a process of healing the traumas, the hurts, the limiting beliefs that were formed at a very early age, and you didn't do anything wrong. 164 0:21:03,803 --> 0:21:18,142 Speaker 1: It's just also required in order to unlock your strength, your courage, your compassion, your spiritual vision, your purpose, those quote unquote wounds that we adopted from our parents or from other people. 165 0:21:18,591 --> 0:21:20,897 Speaker 1: Those are the seeds of our strength. 166 0:21:21,940 --> 0:21:32,613 Speaker 1: And so this is the journey that any person who ever achieves their full potential or experiences extraordinary joy or abundance or happiness or connection or influence goes through. 167 0:21:32,653 --> 0:21:44,423 Speaker 1: We take the compressed experiences of our childhood and we learn how to unlock and allow them, but there isn't anything you got to go, be or do outside, external to you. 168 0:21:44,670 --> 0:22:06,280 Speaker 1: All your power is inside of you, and what we're talking about today is how to unlock one aspect of this energetic strength inside of you, and that is to talk about how we can reorient ourselves or transform this idea of there's something wrong with you or you're broken because there isn't anything wrong with you and there's nothing to fix. 169 0:22:07,103 --> 0:22:13,525 Speaker 1: You're just in a process of expansion that feels uncomfortable and that no one ever really educated us on. 170 0:22:13,967 --> 0:22:16,215 Speaker 1: So, number one, what's going on? 171 0:22:16,256 --> 0:22:16,637 Speaker 1: Right now? 172 0:22:17,119 --> 0:22:29,081 Speaker 1: You're more self aware than ever before, but there's this misinterpretation created by the mind that's telling you you're doing something wrong, that you're not as far along as you should be, that you need to be doing more, that you're broken, that there's something wrong with you. 173 0:22:29,101 --> 0:22:29,584 Speaker 1: And it's not true. 174 0:22:30,268 --> 0:22:32,957 Speaker 1: What's true is your, and that's why it doesn't feel good. 175 0:22:33,840 --> 0:22:49,429 Speaker 1: What's true is you're getting even clearer on what you don't want, so that you can begin forming an extraordinary vision of the life that you have, because the future of your life is going to be created through this vision and this imagination. 176 0:22:49,449 --> 0:22:52,139 Speaker 1: So you have an opportunity to unlock vision. 177 0:22:52,942 --> 0:22:55,250 Speaker 1: And number two you're healing these thoughts, these emotions. 178 0:22:56,678 --> 0:23:01,100 Speaker 1: They don't mean there's something wrong with you, either right when your life is externally right now, there's nothing wrong with you. 179 0:23:01,120 --> 0:23:07,088 Speaker 1: You're just learning what you prefer, and what's happening inside of you is not an indicator that there's something wrong with you. 180 0:23:07,188 --> 0:23:14,719 Speaker 1: We all have these thoughts and emotions at different levels of intensity, and I've experienced them personally in very intense levels. 181 0:23:14,819 --> 0:23:27,266 Speaker 1: That's why I share my story with you, and now, having coached over a thousand people through our programs, close to 10,000 people, maybe more, through our live and virtual events, I can tell you everybody's wired the same way. 182 0:23:27,286 --> 0:23:36,903 Speaker 1: It's just that we don't have the vulnerability to be communicating this way to each other, and so we all begin to isolate, thinking we're the only one right and you're not. 183 0:23:37,465 --> 0:23:42,042 Speaker 1: Everybody's going through this, but most people don't understand what this is right. 184 0:23:42,102 --> 0:24:01,942 Speaker 1: It's a healing process, it's a growth process, it's an awareness process, and the more that you can just allow it by knowing that this is what's going on, the more rapid your ability to let go of these things and to support their transformation into the vision that will continue to grow and unfold. 185 0:24:03,385 --> 0:24:14,049 Speaker 1: I spoke a moment ago about this idea of what I was going through, this idea of the separation that we all have right that we think we're the only ones that are going through this and therefore there's something wrong with us. 186 0:24:16,394 --> 0:24:21,267 Speaker 1: And what really catalyzes that is our ability to compare. 187 0:24:21,327 --> 0:24:22,510 Speaker 1: Comparing is not a problem, right. 188 0:24:23,993 --> 0:24:34,727 Speaker 1: Our ability to compare is built into just sort of the natural evaluation and process that we go throughout life, right, like we compare two things. 189 0:24:34,747 --> 0:24:36,367 Speaker 1: Comparing can be really really useful as well. 190 0:24:36,459 --> 0:24:59,243 Speaker 1: When I'm kind of looking at my business and I'm looking at someone else's business and I'm looking at the differences between the businesses, or my book and someone else's book, or my relationship and someone else's relationship, but I'm evaluating right, I'm evaluating what I like about what someone else has been able to create, and then I'm an inquiry about well, how can I create that in my own life? 191 0:25:00,086 --> 0:25:04,237 Speaker 1: But we've ended up with this distortion around comparing. 192 0:25:04,297 --> 0:25:05,460 Speaker 1: It's no longer useful. 193 0:25:06,463 --> 0:25:18,939 Speaker 1: We're actually looking at other people's lives to justify this false idea that we have this mental ideation that there's something wrong with us and that we're not good enough. 194 0:25:19,842 --> 0:25:20,826 Speaker 1: And there's two things here. 195 0:25:20,907 --> 0:25:21,730 Speaker 1: Number one you're on your own journey. 196 0:25:23,739 --> 0:25:23,980 Speaker 1: You know. 197 0:25:24,100 --> 0:25:29,956 Speaker 1: I don't know what spirit has planned for you, but I know that you and spirit were in agreement before you incarnated on this planet that you were going to come. 198 0:25:30,023 --> 0:25:31,316 Speaker 1: You were going to learn some things. 199 0:25:31,408 --> 0:25:35,019 Speaker 1: You were going to go through some compressions, what we might call challenges. 200 0:25:36,162 --> 0:25:44,108 Speaker 1: You were going to be born to specific people who were going to pre-program you and set you up for the transformation of those programs into an extraordinary life. 201 0:25:44,128 --> 0:25:44,570 Speaker 1: That's what I know. 202 0:25:46,194 --> 0:25:51,268 Speaker 1: Every single person is given that possibility and that opportunity. 203 0:25:51,288 --> 0:26:04,566 Speaker 1: I think that's why we're here on earth in this physical reality, and so I don't know what your potential looks like, but I know it's amazing and it's unique to you. 204 0:26:04,586 --> 0:26:09,402 Speaker 1: There are no two people on this planet who are set up for the same experience. 205 0:26:09,422 --> 0:26:16,370 Speaker 1: The mistake we make is we look at what someone else's experience is and we think that should be our experience, and everybody's on a different timeline. 206 0:26:17,695 --> 0:26:31,113 Speaker 1: Everybody's going through and transforming or metabolizing, translating different challenges, and so we're not well served by looking at someone else's journey to try to give context or define where we are in ours. 207 0:26:32,054 --> 0:26:45,098 Speaker 1: It doesn't make any sense, but we do it right and that's why I want you to understand that you're unique and whatever you're going through right now, it's the setup for whatever your greatness is gonna look like. 208 0:26:46,135 --> 0:26:57,302 Speaker 1: And, again, a big piece of this is us transforming, letting go of this idea that anything occurring right now is indicative of there being something wrong, or you being broken or something wrong with you. 209 0:26:57,715 --> 0:27:01,201 Speaker 1: You're just healing, you're becoming more self aware, you're becoming more clear on your preferences. 210 0:27:02,496 --> 0:27:37,243 Speaker 1: And the other reason why comparing doesn't serve us is because most of the time, what we see is some superficial, not full story example of someone's life, and a lot of other people out there are doing what maybe you're doing certainly what I did which is pretending, pretending what my life feels like or is like, in order to put on a show out of fear that if I don't, others won't love me and that people will discover again, going back to this core idea that there's something wrong with me and that I'm broken. 211 0:27:37,815 --> 0:27:40,544 Speaker 1: So we can see the insanity of this dance that we play. 212 0:27:40,604 --> 0:27:42,826 Speaker 1: Right, exacerbated by social media. 213 0:27:43,349 --> 0:28:00,217 Speaker 1: You got a whole bunch of people who think there's something wrong with them, who are building up their lives as false idols and presenting that to other people so that they can win other people's love, so that they can then justify that there's nothing wrong with themselves. 214 0:28:00,237 --> 0:28:05,860 Speaker 1: Like all this energy and activity to address something that was never really true in the first place. 215 0:28:06,726 --> 0:28:12,321 Speaker 1: Right, this is part of the explanation of why the world looks so crazy right now. 216 0:28:13,155 --> 0:28:21,501 Speaker 1: But you don't have to live in the craziness, and it starts by acknowledging and realizing that there's nothing wrong with you. 217 0:28:22,395 --> 0:28:26,178 Speaker 1: I'm telling you right now I don't know your story, I don't know who you are. 218 0:28:26,439 --> 0:28:30,682 Speaker 1: I know there's nothing wrong with you Because I know there's nothing you can do to be wrong. 219 0:28:31,595 --> 0:28:33,883 Speaker 1: You're just learning throughout the course of your life. 220 0:28:34,315 --> 0:28:37,304 Speaker 1: Carol and I have been blessed with Gabriel, who just turned one. 221 0:28:38,458 --> 0:28:39,863 Speaker 1: Like does he do anything that's wrong? 222 0:28:40,255 --> 0:28:43,879 Speaker 1: No, he tries things, some things he tries. 223 0:28:43,939 --> 0:28:45,865 Speaker 1: He's not successful at the outcome. 224 0:28:45,955 --> 0:28:48,043 Speaker 1: I wouldn't even call it a mistake, right? 225 0:28:48,195 --> 0:29:04,063 Speaker 1: He's learning how to function as a human being and I don't care if you're 20 or 30 or 50 or 70, you're always learning and nobody ever taught you or taught me or taught us how to actually become a whole human being. 226 0:29:04,915 --> 0:29:16,863 Speaker 1: We come down through this lineage generations of misunderstanding and dysfunction, and that's what compels us to operate in dysfunctional ways in our lives. 227 0:29:16,995 --> 0:29:19,023 Speaker 1: Now note I said dysfunctional. 228 0:29:19,115 --> 0:29:22,781 Speaker 1: It's not functional in the way that it could be, but that doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. 229 0:29:23,115 --> 0:29:24,661 Speaker 1: That doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong. 230 0:29:24,875 --> 0:29:30,178 Speaker 1: That doesn't mean that you're broken, and it doesn't mean that you have more to fix than anybody else. 231 0:29:30,975 --> 0:29:36,061 Speaker 1: Trust me, I've spoken to a lot of people and I've gone through my own process. 232 0:29:36,663 --> 0:29:50,841 Speaker 1: Right, you ain't the best, you ain't the worst in terms of the stuff that you may wanna be working through in your life, or the volume of thoughts you have, or the measure of the emotions that don't feel good, or where you are in your bank account. 233 0:29:51,483 --> 0:29:59,645 Speaker 1: Right, you're doing just fine and from where you are right now, you can build anything. 234 0:30:00,815 --> 0:30:04,465 Speaker 1: The way that we do that is to drop the resistance. 235 0:30:05,175 --> 0:30:09,005 Speaker 1: Let go of this idea that there's anything wrong with you. 236 0:30:09,955 --> 0:30:11,502 Speaker 1: Would you like to have more financial prosperity? 237 0:30:11,675 --> 0:30:12,800 Speaker 1: Sure, is there anything wrong with you? 238 0:30:13,061 --> 0:30:13,181 Speaker 1: No. 239 0:30:13,795 --> 0:30:16,482 Speaker 1: Would you like to have increased experience of your health? 240 0:30:16,723 --> 0:30:18,066 Speaker 1: Yes, is there anything wrong with you? 241 0:30:18,315 --> 0:30:23,160 Speaker 1: No, do you have a lot of thoughts that you can't control and they create a lot of emotions that don't feel good? 242 0:30:23,341 --> 0:30:24,765 Speaker 1: Yes, does that mean there's anything wrong with you? 243 0:30:25,075 --> 0:30:25,176 Speaker 1: No. 244 0:30:26,215 --> 0:30:28,140 Speaker 1: Are you experiencing addiction or anxiety or depression? 245 0:30:28,381 --> 0:30:29,824 Speaker 1: Yes, does that mean there's anything wrong with you? 246 0:30:30,105 --> 0:30:30,205 Speaker 1: No. 247 0:30:31,975 --> 0:30:35,319 Speaker 1: Are you trying to grow your business, and it's been five years and it feels like you're not making a lot of progress? 248 0:30:35,540 --> 0:30:36,923 Speaker 1: Yes, does that mean there's anything wrong with you? 249 0:30:37,124 --> 0:30:37,224 Speaker 1: No. 250 0:30:39,875 --> 0:30:40,920 Speaker 1: Would you like to have a soulmate? 251 0:30:41,015 --> 0:30:45,500 Speaker 1: You've had a hard time attracting someone that you're really passionate about yes. 252 0:30:45,741 --> 0:30:46,724 Speaker 1: Does that mean there's something wrong with you? 253 0:30:46,944 --> 0:30:47,065 Speaker 1: No. 254 0:30:47,815 --> 0:30:51,898 Speaker 1: Do you have a relationship where you don't have the connection, the passion, the communication that you'd like? 255 0:30:53,182 --> 0:30:56,175 Speaker 1: Yes, something wrong with you no. 256 0:30:56,215 --> 0:30:59,143 Speaker 1: Years ago did you make mistakes, big ones? 257 0:30:59,484 --> 0:31:01,099 Speaker 1: Yes, something wrong with you? 258 0:31:01,555 --> 0:31:01,756 Speaker 1: No. 259 0:31:02,935 --> 0:31:07,060 Speaker 1: It's a learning process and you have to realize you're good enough. 260 0:31:08,415 --> 0:31:19,443 Speaker 1: You're so loved by life, by the universe, by me, by people around you who don't even know you, who see you as a human being in a more holistic way than you see yourself. 261 0:31:21,231 --> 0:31:23,258 Speaker 1: You don't need to do anything to impress us. 262 0:31:24,030 --> 0:31:28,810 Speaker 1: You don't have to do anything to be more loved other than be available for the love that's already there. 263 0:31:28,991 --> 0:31:47,800 Speaker 1: Be available to impress yourself and you open up that availability when we stop buying into this idea, which is just part of this ancient primal nervous system, that then materializes as thoughts that we experience inside of our head and then experiences emotions inside of our body that you're not good enough, or that you're not doing enough, or that there's something wrong with you or that you're broken. 264 0:31:48,511 --> 0:31:51,798 Speaker 1: None of it was ever true, but you can make it true for yourself. 265 0:31:51,910 --> 0:31:55,862 Speaker 1: You can slow down your momentum by continuing to buy into it. 266 0:31:56,732 --> 0:31:59,170 Speaker 1: The good news is is you don't have to be perfect about any of this. 267 0:31:59,271 --> 0:32:05,001 Speaker 1: You can still have days where you feel like you're not good enough, but life loves you so much that it'll carry you to your vision anyway. 268 0:32:06,551 --> 0:32:13,410 Speaker 1: I didn't create the life that I have now because I had a perfect mindset, because every single day, I have self-love and self-esteem. 269 0:32:13,551 --> 0:32:14,877 Speaker 1: No, not even close. 270 0:32:16,183 --> 0:32:26,536 Speaker 1: But just a small change in the way that you think can produce dramatic shifts in your experience of life and your manifestation of life. 271 0:32:27,511 --> 0:32:36,378 Speaker 1: And so this is my wish for you, and I'll say it for you if you have a little bit of resistance right now, you're doing an amazing job. 272 0:32:36,710 --> 0:32:39,159 Speaker 1: You are absolutely good enough. 273 0:32:39,250 --> 0:32:44,990 Speaker 1: There's nothing that we could take away or add to you to make you even better or even more. 274 0:32:45,110 --> 0:32:48,481 Speaker 1: You were whole when you came into this world, and you're whole now. 275 0:32:48,690 --> 0:33:04,699 Speaker 1: This is all just a process of you remembering, realizing that there's nothing wrong with you, and letting go of those ideas that you picked up along the way that simply don't serve you well, that have the capacity to alter your experience of reality so that it seems like they're true, but they aren't. 276 0:33:05,750 --> 0:33:11,143 Speaker 1: And if you're willing to let it go, everything can and will change. 277 0:33:11,891 --> 0:33:14,850 Speaker 1: That is my promise to you Baby steps, one day at a time. 278 0:33:16,113 --> 0:33:17,397 Speaker 1: Catch yourself judging yourself. 279 0:33:17,940 --> 0:33:18,361 Speaker 1: Let it go. 280 0:33:19,255 --> 0:33:21,128 Speaker 1: Catch yourself saying there's something wrong with you. 281 0:33:21,148 --> 0:33:23,457 Speaker 1: Let it go In the space. 282 0:33:23,718 --> 0:33:26,130 Speaker 1: When you have it, remind yourself there's nothing wrong with you. 283 0:33:26,953 --> 0:33:31,085 Speaker 1: You're doing great, and only extraordinary things are ahead for you. 284 0:33:31,105 --> 0:33:32,690 Speaker 1: I love you so much. 285 0:33:33,413 --> 0:33:40,328 Speaker 1: Thank you for being here for this wonderful reminder for myself, because I need it every single day, sometimes multiple times a day. 286 0:33:40,874 --> 0:33:48,950 Speaker 1: So stay connected, stay in this work, stay in fellowship with others who are doing this work too. 287 0:33:49,030 --> 0:33:50,809 Speaker 1: There isn't anything else you really need to do. 288 0:33:51,552 --> 0:33:53,446 Speaker 1: You're good, you're whole and I love you. 289 0:33:56,672 --> 0:33:57,733 Speaker 1: I'll see you in the next episode. 290 0:34:23,910 --> 0:34:28,690 Speaker 1: The framework that have helped tens of thousands of people established a change mind. 291 0:34:28,810 --> 0:34:32,816 Speaker 1: Don't forget to jump on over to the site and I will see you in the next episode.