Sa.

And we're back with part six of 2026, the cosmic context on the Maya Games, part six of an 11 question mark part series.

So this is the middle point.

If you're listening to these conversations in order, then you'll be over the hump after you listen to this episode.

I'm over the hump as of recording this intro.

And especially as of releasing this episode, I'll be over the hump because I've already had my conversation on Saturn which will follow this one.

I'm really seeing the Jupiter and Saturn parts of this series as a pair that go together.

So I'm glad that with The Oracle of 11 persons scheduling these conversations ended up being back to back, because it was really helpful for me to think about the two of them as I talk about a little bit in this episode on Jupiter and more in the following episode on Saturn, I talk a bit about how I often think of Jupiter and Saturn as the inverse of each other.

And in the next episode I talk about their glyphs and how I teach on these two planets and how that's informed my relationship with them and my relationship with them and them with each other.

And anyways, yeah, I think I don't have a whole lot to say in the intro on this episode specifically because some of these conversations, when I listen back and edit, I have a greater sense from the outside of them of what the conversation was about as a whole and how that planet that we invoke as we focus in on it, how it's coming through.

Sometimes I don't see as clearly the.

Planet'S own presence and agenda in our.

Conversation until I'm outside of it listening back.

But, you know, I'm Jupiter.

I am Jupiter.

I'm Jupiter ruled.

I'm an agent of Jupiter, so I'm never very far removed from Jupiter's mission.

So as I was recording this convo, I felt very, for the most part, pretty clear on the meaning of it and what Jupiter's agenda was throughout.

As I listened back and edited, I certainly was able to more deeply digest and revel in some of what Britain was sharing.

It's always a little bit of a different experience to receive what's coming through my conversation partner as well as what's coming through me from the other side of it.

So I took things in on a deeper and more profound level as I listened back.

But I do feel like during the conversation, the overall theme was pretty apparent to me.

And so I don't think I have a whole lot of extra framing to do in this intro.

But one of the things I do feel called to share is just it's been such a treat this last week to record on Jupiter with Britain and on Saturn with Aleeya.

And I'm really excited to share these next two episodes sort of as a pair within the whole.

And both my conversation partners in this one Britton, and in the next one Aleeyah, are both quite Saturnian and Jupiterian in ways.

So we talk about that in both episodes.

So I don't need to get in the weeds about what I mean by that.

But there's a real influence of both of these two planets that are together helping to clarify the experience that we're having in any moment and in ourselves.

Through both the lens of what is real, what am I facing, what is.

The non negotiable reality of the moment and also through the lens of and what is beyond that that I maybe can't see yet and what meaning can I make out of this?

So there's this kind of like D.

Between tangible process and tangible evolution and then the thing just beyond that tangible process and tangible evolution or perhaps we could say the internal meaning making faith oriented alchemy that is resourcing that tangible.

Reality of our life.

I didn't know that's what I was.

Gonna say when I hit record.

I guess that's how I'm thinking about it today.

Those are some words to describe how I'm thinking about it today.

But just really through this last week.

Of recording on Jupiter and Saturn, I've fallen back in love with the role that these two planets play together and the ways that they play their roles together and how each one is inextricable from the other.

In this conversation with Britain, we talk about Jupiter as a whole quite a bit and then just start to organically find ourselves noticing that the way we're talking about Jupiter in a more generalized way does connect to how we've been experiencing Jupiter for the past half of a year.

As at the time of recording in early 2026, Jupiter is just about halfway, just over halfway through its time in Cancer.

It's been, okay, maybe, yeah, somewhere between halfway and 2/3.

Jupiter's been in cancer for about eight months and has about five months left before it will move into LEO at the end of June, June 29, 2026.

So we do get into Jupiter in Leo quite a bit.

But we really are focusing on that transition from Cancer to leo and not necessarily just through the lens of jup the distillation of Cancer and the distillation of Leo and some of the edges that exist between those two signs, and then applying our own Jupiterian perspectives towards where we are in the current process of marinating in the Jupiter in Cancer, meaning and resource and generosity and abundance and how we're feeling into how that might make way for the lessons and the journey and the abundance and the meaning and the faith in the way that Jupiter will bring it through to us when it enters Leo later this year.

And of course, all of this is so deeply connected to everything else also happening in the sky, which is why I have been excited to experiment with looking at the astrology this way over these many conversations, going really deep one at a time.

So.

Yeah, you'll find a lot of.

Repeated themes in here from other episodes.

We talk about perhaps Chiron.

The most is the other planet that we make note of.

And a bit the nodes finishing up in Virgo and Pisces and a sort of hypervigilance.

And where is the line between care and hypervigilance is a really big one that comes up.

And then we talk about Leo, Aquarius and pride and recognition and yeah, it's a fun episode.

It's a fun conversation and a fun episode and I hope you find some somatic meaning in it.

I hope you are able to resonate with the sense of deeper meaning, purpose, faith in your own body by tuning in.

I will invite you once again, I think I just mentioned this for the first time in the Pluto episode that preceded this.

I will invite you to come be a part of the conversations.

If you are a patron on any of my tiers, you'll have access to both a Patreon post that invites some discussion in the comments around this series, as well as a specific channel dedicated just to this series in the Discord server.

And there's all sorts of channels in the Discord server.

There's a lot of Human Design specific ones where you can chat with people who have your type or share profile line with you.

There's a channel just for talking about the Living youg Design podcast, which is where I've put out my course, my Human Design course for free.

I wasn't prepared to talk about this, so I don't know what other channels to tell you about.

And then there's like I said, a channel just for this podcast series right now where you can weigh in and contribute.

Yeah, I love the breaking the parasocial wall just a little bit and getting to witness the ripples of influence in both directions.

So if you have things to say if you want to be witnessed in your own process with this stuff, that those are places where you can share and externalize and be seen.

And all of that's available on the Solarium tier, which is $15 a month.

And then I do have a much higher cost tier called the Altar, which is where we really break the parasocial wall and I get to know you and you can meet with me and other current students and community members of mine twice a month.

And there's extra access to channels on the Altar tier where you can poke me and ask me specific questions and share your chart and yeah, get a bit deeper with other folks.

So that's all available to you.

I will also remind you that Ascendant Assemblies starts next month, depending on your Rising Sign.

We are meeting for two hours either on Saturday, March 7 or Saturday, March 14 to digest the transits of this last bit of time, as well as look forward a bit to the next bit of time.

So that's where we'll be talking about what the fuck was it like to have Saturn in your first?

And what are we starting to feel into as Saturn has shifted out of Pisces into Aries and perhaps your second house.

And whatever house it is for you, we'll be looking at it really specifically with people of your same Rising Sign element who are experiencing the transits to the same group of houses as you.

So super excited to get Ascendant Assemblies going again.

Like I said, it starts the second and third Saturdays of March, or maybe it's the first, the seventh and the 14th of March.

And if you're on the Solarium tier now, you can vote on which day and which time your Elemental Rising Sign meets, and I'll be announcing them within this week.

Within a week of this episode coming out, I'll be announcing the exact dates and times and they are recorded as well.

So even if you can't make it live, you'll get access to the playback where people of your Rising Sign are talking about it and astrologers and astrology enthusiasts present are delineating the experience from their differentiated view.

And of course, the Patreon posts and discord.

There are places to tune in and externalize and bring your thoughts, even if you aren't going to make it live to this quarter's call.

So y' all are invited to join us in Ascendant Assemblies.

There's more info about it on a free post on my Patreon.

All of this is@kelseyrosedort.com.

sorry, no patreon.com Kelseyrosetort Enjoy this conversation with Britain.

Check out links to several things that are mentioned in the conversation below and see you next time for Saturn.

Welcome to the Maya Games, Britain.

Thanks for having me, Kelsey.

So mine and Britain's pre pressing the record button, check in included both of us kind of talking about the aspects of the last bit that's been kind of like hard but both of us with a very Jupiterian spin of just perspective and silver lining and it's fineness.

And yeah, I was just thinking about how we're meeting right now as two pretty heavily Jupiterian beings at the tail end of a double Saturn season at the tail end of a Aquarius to talk about Jupiter.

And we're talking about ahead of recording we're connecting on what has felt kind of hard in our physical form and how the body kind of shows us that we may not be as fine as we think we are.

And yeah, it just felt very like two Jupiterians meeting in Saturn season which doesn't feel separate from what I imagine the shape of this convo might be a little bit like.

We know we're in a crunchy time as a collective and yet we still have access to Jupiter.

And so how can Jupiter support us?

What is Jupiter up to this year?

So yes, welcome Britain, fellow Jupiterian.

Hello Jupiter.

Would you like to introduce.

I think I just felt organically drawn in that moment to talk about Jupiter in our charts and our Jupiterian nature and I'm wondering if you would be interested in using your Jupiteranness, whatever that means to you as a starting point for introducing yourself.

Yeah, I'd love to do that.

Well, because I have a Pisces Sun, Pisces, Mercury, Pisces Venus, I'm born this way in the 12th house.

I consider myself a very Jupiterian person.

I also consider myself pretty Saturnian as well.

But I know I teach in a very Jupiterian way because I am always like looking for the larger lesson, like what is the larger meaning that we can hug into here.

It's just kind of where I naturally expand into naturally very pattern seeking and naturally really just trusting that there's something larger at play that I can't see and that there's like something larger than me holding me that's kind of orchestrating this entire experience.

And the more I trust in it, the more I can enjoy myself rather than try to control what's happening my own Jupiter is in late Gemini in a square then to my Pisces planets in the third house for me.

And so I have Mercury And Jupiter in mutual reception.

And I do feel that that's one of the pieces of my chart that I'm most excited about.

I feel really lucky having Jupiter in detriment.

I love to find pattern between ideas and symbols and feel in.

I feel into data and like, I feel into truth every.

In every little thing.

And so I feel like I see big truth in little daily things.

And I think that I.

That's kind of my gift is synthesizing and kind of like gathering up daily truths and the human experience and the mundane and then kind of spreading it around and disseminating that around.

So, yeah, I hope that that's helpful as a way to jump in.

But I've seen Jupiter in my chart there.

There's already a lot there that's interesting to me.

Yeah.

I'm looking at your chart.

Are you comfortable with aspects?

Oh, yeah, totally.

You said I'm also very saturnian.

And I'm looking at your chart.

I'm like, yes, Capricorn Moon.

And I was thinking how much it is like me to just catch the resonance of Jupiter in someone.

And I used the word chronic Sagittarius this morning.

I'm just like, I'm always drawn.

Where's the Jupiter?

Give me the Jupiter.

So that's what I catch in you, even though.

Yeah.

You are quite Saturnian as well.

And we're both very Martian, too.

Yeah.

Because I'm Aries rising.

Yeah.

And I have Sun, Mercury, Venus, all in Aries.

Yeah.

You know, I just did my Jupiter class just last week with my year two students in my school.

And I was talking about how I love seeing Jupiter in people.

I feel like I'm Jupiter seeking in people, like sensing where it is.

Like, I want to feel it and then I want to tap it and feel it flow toward me.

Give me that Jupiter.

I just feel like people are so exquisite where their Jupiter is in them, you know?

And I think a lot of people don't necessarily see it.

See their own.

See their own Jupiterian quality.

Yeah.

Interesting.

So, you know, I'm also Jupiter in Gemini.

Oh, yeah.

Fellow Jupiter in Dutchman.

Two degrees for me.

Two degrees.

Okay.

Other side.

And it's my chart ruler and it's in the seventh.

So it was really cool hearing you articulate a bit of how that Jupiter in Gemini shows up in the third for you in the everyday.

But, yeah, it's so present for me in the seventh.

And even you being like, people don't really see it.

There's something in that that's been part of My own experience with Jupiter, having it as my chart ruler.

I am Jupiter.

I'm here on behalf of Jupiter.

Jupiter is in everything I.

And yet for me it's in the seventh.

And so it really takes this, what I just said this like, where's the Jupiter in you that I did to you?

I have to be sitting across from experiencing the reflection of me through someone else.

I need that seventh house other relating to connect to this thing that is such a huge part of my own essence.

So, yeah, that's some of what's floating around for me.

Hearing your own experience of finding Jupiter in the other.

I also had a thought.

I took a little walk right before I got on this call and I was thinking about how the last time I met with you face to face was for the series on your podcast Moon to Moon, where you did a series on each house and we did the 11th, which is where Jupiter rejoices, which I didn't consciously make that connection that then I was like, oh, Britain for Jupiter for this series.

So we've been finding the Jupiter in each other.

Oh my gosh, that's crazy.

That is one of my favorite episodes.

I thought that was really fun.

And we came.

I feel like we came into some new land there.

Yeah, it felt very ethereal.

Other dimensional for sure.

Yeah, totally.

Yeah.

Okay, so let's talk about Jupiter a little bit outside of us.

I mean, we can talk about Jupiter in us as much as we want.

But one of the phrases that you used that I really liked when you were describing Jupiter in you, as you were describing your Piscean nature feeling always connected to something larger that you can't see.

And I just wanted to point out that that phrase really resonated with me as both a way that feels so obviously Jupiterian, but also struck me in a new way.

And I imagine some of that has to do with the sides of Jupiter.

The way that my Jupiterianism shows up most evidently is in this day sect Fire, sag, Jupiter, which is a different orientation or a different.

Yeah, it's a different flavor than Jupiter's night sect Water Pisces, which I also feel very connected to as a Pisces North Node and ic.

But yeah, it's not my most automatic connection point to Jupiter.

I think for me, when I first begin at what is Jupiter?

What's the role that Jupiter plays?

For me, my first go to when I talk about it, when I attune to it for myself, when I teach about it, is that Jupiter is our meaning maker.

Jupiter's making sense of things.

It's giving us access to understand what's going on from this bigger picture perspective.

But if I think about the SAG version of that and the Pisces version of that, Jupiter's two signs, Sag and Pisces, they bookend what I call the third trimester of the zodiac, like the third time through the elements.

And I conceive of that third trimester as the afterlife.

So we live our life in Aries through Scorpio.

And then when we get to the sag part of any cycle, it's like we're kind of looking at it from the outside, but in Sag, we're just outside of it.

We haven't really shed the ego yet.

Right.

It's fire.

So it's like meaning making from me.

If we think about the previous fire sign, Leo, which we'll probably talk about a lot today, Leo is like from the centrality of my essence, of my ego, of my will, I'm looking out at everything, right.

Ruled by the Sun.

Everything actually does revolve around Leo.

So sag, even though it has this slightly less personal gaze being Jupiter's further away, it's not the sun, it's not actually in the center of things.

It's still fire.

So it's still like, what did this mean for me?

Like, what is the subjective meaning?

How am I as an ego making sense of.

And so that's like the entry point that is most obvious for me with Jupiter as a sag rising is like, it's still very personal.

And then when we get to Pisces, we're closing out the whole zodiac.

This is a water sign.

So there's still this Jupiterian, like a little bit of this.

What did it all mean?

But it's in a much less mental way.

And so I think that's part of why I was drawn to your initial, to this phrase of something larger that I can't see because that's very paisian.

Whereas for sag, the Jupiter, faith and trust and beneficism, making up a word has to do with I can see it.

It's a big picture that I can see and that I can digest and metabolize.

And it creates this meaning that means something to me and it's graspable in a way.

And that's Jupiter too.

But then there's this other Jupiter thing happening in Pisces that is, I think, more faith based, less tangible.

Right?

Yeah.

What does that bring up for you?

Or.

Well.

I was imagining, like, I don't know, I'LL make up the word, but I'm guessing medieval.

I'll make it up as like my very is like very Jupiter and Gemini with all the Pisces.

We're just like using a word.

Sounds right.

No, you're using it wrong.

But you're like.

But there's a meaning behind it.

You'll catch it.

You'll get the frequency.

I like the vibe.

Yeah, like the like minstrel character who will pop in and sing something poetic that's like not exactly in like the typical nitty gritty prose that were regularly using.

But then they're.

But they're like narrating it in this beautiful way that you trust.

Like, well, there comes the minstrel, like there's the bard.

Like, now we're gonna find out what's going on.

This edit, this quality of like we have a part of us that is helping us to understand the.

The regular old experience in a more song like way or a poetic way, a philosophical way that it feel to me it feels like it like lifts, you know, lifts the mundane into something like art and it feels good.

Does that resonate?

Yeah, yeah.

You know, it was coming up for me a lot is like so related to what I was sharing with you ahead of pressing record of my personal experience.

Lately it's like, yeah, things have felt really hard and things always feel hard for me this time of year.

And so in witnessing that and knowing that and seeing that and understanding that there's a.

There's some kind of balm.

Because I know, like, for me, I know this is going to lead to something that I do understand.

It's going to lead to expansion.

It's gonna lead to another inhale.

And so there's something in that that feels like balm.

And yet Saturn, that understanding, that mental acquiescence, I have no idea if that's the right word, doesn't actually relieve me entirely from the physical sensation of hardness in this season.

And if I think about that on like a way bigger level, which I do often, I think about the level of surrender that I've experienced via my human design experiment and like the relationship with my mind being one where I really don't.

It can't hurt me anymore.

Like, that's the honest truth is I can see my mental distortion and I know it for what it is now and it will not take me down with it.

And yet when I'm in these seasons where it's like difficult to give my mind a job because things feel foggy, like some kind of deconstruction is happening.

It's just not time to move yet.

And so my mind has a lot of space to just take up.

There's like, I got a little off track.

But when you were like having that, that song and dance to kind of listen to that feels good.

I'm thinking about how like no matter how awake, aware, conscious we are, no matter how connected to our God parts of self like our, from a human design perspective, I might say like dropping how dropped in we are to this spirit consciousness of the solar plexus and less reliant on the mind consciousness, the 3D binary duality consciousness, we still are here on this planet in these bodies, in the matrix of duality.

And so yeah, just really feeling into Jupiter as like it's like, it's kind of like a treat that we get.

Like having awareness, having faith is like a treat that we get.

That's almost like palliative care for the existential suffering that is somewhat non negotiable in these incarnated experiences.

Yeah, for me, school, you know, third house and like taking classes, learning books, some of that's the Sagittarius ninth house that I have was a way to like leap into some, a place where I was away from the hardship or the suffering, the, the endurance, the grief.

And I genuinely did do, do love learning and love writing and love art and.

But it was sort of indist for a lot of my life.

It was indistinguishable from where I also could kind of numb out and learning to be a person who's in touch with her body.

Chiron and Taurus here.

Coming up on my Chiron return.

I just have learned so much in the last eight years about being present in the discomfort of my feeling body.

And this is just coming up from what you shared that I still love that I can basically lift off into the Jupiterian things that I love.

But it's not escapism anymore from feeling, which it did play that role for a big part of my life.

And I'm curious if that could be part of a definition of Jupiter here too.

I mean I do have Neptune and sag, so I'm bringing that streak of altered states to my Jupiterian experience.

Jupiter and Neptune are very in cahoots in your chart.

Yeah, yeah, that's so interesting.

There's so much here that I'm like, yeah, a lot of this thread that we have found ourselves tugging initially is so alive for a lot of what I'm looking at and curious about right.

Now.

Which I actually have thought a lot about as a Chiron in Taurus thing.

So interesting.

Yeah, Chiron in Taurus being kind of healing, like having to heal through the non negotiable component of embodiment and localized embodiment.

I've been thinking of Chiron and Aries as the wound of separation.

Like the abandonment of having to separate from Source when we shift from Pisces to Aries.

And so that shift from Aries to Taurus, maybe there's been some peace made or the potential for peace being made has happened through this Chiron and Aries transit of like we've had to look at the parts of us that are just hurting for being separate from Source, for having this embarking on the intentional illusion of separation as a spirit.

And so now Chiron moving into Taurus's territories territory, starting this year for the summer of this year, we get our first dip into Chiron in Taurus is like what happens when that separate spirit takes on form, takes on embodiment.

And yeah, I think about this last bit of Neptune in Pisces and Saturn in Pisces even and Chiron in Aries and all the spiritual awareness that has seemingly come online.

You know, hard to say what's true in the actual zeitgeist and collective versus what's true in my own system that I'm seeing, you know, out there in the world.

But I'm working with an understanding that there has been a lot more attention to spiritual context.

Even Uranus in Taurus, like so much awakening in that transit around the capacity of our bodies and the wisdom in our bodies in relation to everything.

But all of this to say all of this, there's been a lot of what seems to me spiritual advancement and spiritual awareness and spiritual contexts coming more into focus.

And then when Chiron moves into Taurus, perhaps there will be.

The assignment will be to bring all of that knowing more into the body.

Cause I think for me, I think about this a lot as like a 6th house, 12th house thing.

I have to quiet my mind that's telling me that I'm going off in some direction I shouldn't be.

So just taking a moment to.

Okay, got you mind, just gonna finish this thought and we'll see the 6th house and the 12th house.

To me, I teach them as like they're places where we feel trapped.

And when planets are in those houses, their planetary motion is trying to move one way, but the Earth's rotation is moving them the other way.

So there's this perpetual feeling of in the 12th, like I'm trying to get down into my body, but I keep getting thrust out into the sky.

Or the opposite in the sixth, right, I'm trying to get up above the horizon, but diurnal rotation keeps making me set.

We're trapped in those axes.

So I see the 12th as like.

Or the 6th is like, shoot, I'm trapped in this human body.

I'm God, but I'm trapped in this human body.

And then the trap of the 12th is like, even when I die, I'm trapped in the cycle of karma.

I'm trapped in the eternity of the soul.

Whoa.

And so, yeah, 12 house stellium.

You get it?

And so, like this I'm seeing as I'm seeing what I'm registering as, like more spiritual context is coming online.

Like we're becoming more aware as human that we are also God.

Like we're getting this other dimensional context, we're becoming more aware of it.

And that can create a reaction of resenting the locality, the physicality, or not feeling up for the challenge of it.

And so there's a lot of context to say that's a little bit of how I'm looking ahead to Chiron in Taurus.

And it's kind of interesting to think the way that we've found ourselves framing Jupiter here.

I wrote down the words meaning as a treat, understanding as a treat, perspective as a treat.

And it's like, you know, like, we need a treat sometimes we just need a treat to soothe the mind, to soothe the part of us that is feeling stretched across these dimensions of our godness and our humanity.

And I think, like, I've put a lot of pressure on myself to stay in real connection to that bigger picture, to stay in awareness, to stay in surrender, to stay in faith.

Almost like the opposite of what you're saying, where your Jupiterian nature has sometimes leaned towards escapism.

For me, I think it's shown up a lot as like, I need to stay in integrity.

I can't.

Yeah, I guess it's like a different version of escapism where I've not given, I've not wanted to give myself what I need to feel soothed as a human body.

Because I have this higher perspective that I, like, won't.

I won't allow myself the grace to provide nourishment to what my human form actually needs.

And my human form includes this mind.

And so therefore, like, can we let our ego minds, can we let ourselves have meaning, understanding, learning, even escapism, sometimes as a treat?

Because even when I am connected to these bigger, higher Truths, I still am always going to be funneling them, filtering them through this limited human form.

And you know what?

She needs encouragement.

Sometimes she needs her ego fed.

Sometimes she needs a story that might not be connected to the highest truth, but that she can have as a, as a treat to keep her going.

Yeah.

And I mean I, I feel like it's, it allows us to be tool seeking people.

So that in, in my own cosmology, it feels to me like everything I'm going through is a, I'm getting tools, even tools I didn't ask for and don't want, you know, And I don't know yet why I have these tools.

Like why do I have to have these tools?

I wanted other tools actually.

And at some point, I mean, I'm now 47 years old and I've been amazed at the tool apparition moments that eventually show up and you're like, oh my gosh, like I'm made for this.

Like I have the tools, you know, and then there they are.

If you're not looking for the, at the tools that you're accruing, you're gathering and you're being given, then you may not even realize that like you could be of great help and service to yourself, to the people around you when the, when the moment appears, when you actually have the precise toolkit called for.

What A Capricorn Moon midheaven transmission.

That was right there.

I was like, I was like trying to connect it to you being a 35 and the kind of utilitarian ness, because I associate Jupiter a lot with the fifth line.

So when I feel like I'm pulling on Britain's Jupiter resonating with your Jupiter, it feels the same thing to me as like fifth line harmony between us.

And so in this moment.

So I was feeling into your third line as a difference, like there's a much more practical, tangible nature to the three than to the two.

The five two.

But then yesterday I had a call with someone who had some significant Capricorn placements and I was remembering, we were talking about the I am phrase for Capricorn, which is I utilize.

And so I'm primed by that conversation to in this moment recognize the utilitarian.

Like Britain.

You're talking about yourself.

Yeah, the utilitarian nature.

But no, I love it because I can feel really removed.

I was reflecting also ahead of this convo because I'm recording about Saturn with Aleeyah in a few days.

So this week for me is like the week where I'm focusing On Jupiter and Saturn, which are, you know, the other side to each other in many ways.

And so I was reflecting on how they're non aspecting in my own chart.

So there's not like my Jupiter meaning making treat doesn't often have a clear sense of connection to the hard stuff in my life.

Wait, what was I saying right before that?

Whatever, I'll let it go.

I was on a trajectory.

Well, while this may trigger it in my chart, I have my Pisces, Jupiter ruled Sun.

Exactly.

Sextiling my.

My Saturn ruled moon.

And then I have my Jupiter sextiling my Saturn.

So sometimes they, they kind of like go one to the other.

Like what I'm.

What you're sensing is like, it's not a treat.

Yeah, it's not a treat.

It's a tool.

But you just don't know when the time is yet that you're gonna.

Exactly.

You're not eating it and can and it's gone.

You know, it's like you just.

It's delayed gratification.

Your conscious mind as a 35 is like, like everything I'm doing.

And also desire motivation, which you and I connected about recently because that's third color.

So it's like everything I'm doing is going to resource me in some kind of practical way.

Also like moon in Capricorn.

Right.

Whereas as a 5:2, I just like, I don't have that conscious connection all the time.

Like, it's not about that for me.

There's not much utilitarianism that's ingrained in me.

I know.

And you.

I don't know why, why this is true, but I do feel like utilitarian sounds so like dry and sad.

But in my body, what I'm talking about feels like the most loving thing that there is.

No.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I agree.

I think we have kind of a fraught relationship with Capricorn just at this moment in humanity's evolution because of what the physical manifestations are of like Capricornian structure.

And you know, we're on the tail end of Pluto in Capric.

And so yeah, I think when we think utilitarian, we are projecting a lot of current context onto it and onto Capricorn.

But for me, that's like a really helpful anchor for me to remember.

It's just like what I was saying.

My form of escapism has to do a lot with holding myself to some kind of spiritual standard that I don't even realize in the moment is invalidating the truth of my physical existence.

So I project some kind of lesser inferiority onto the ability to actually take these 9th house y spiritual context, or 12th house y spiritual context, those cadent houses into their opposites in a more grounded third house or sixth house orientation.

So I think what I'm trying to bring here is, like, I do think with Chiron moving into Taurus, for one, I do think that pulling from.

And also we can see this with Jupiter and Saturn.

Maybe this is our segue into Jupiter in 2026, with Jupiter and Saturn being on the tail end of these water signs and moving into fire signs this year.

I do think there's something to.

Okay, we have to take these ideas and this watery calibration.

Or maybe you don't have to.

Maybe that's too strong of language.

I don't know.

I'm in Aries.

Yeah, we have to.

Let's be decisive about, you know, and, like, ground them into this plane.

Like, all this information, all of this knowledge, all this connection to beyond, it's not just there for the sake of being connected to the beyond.

That's part of it.

That's nice.

I've appreciated this, like, watery period of recalibration and all of the insights that it's offered me.

And we're coming up on a phase, an era, where it's, like, time to put that knowing, that calibration, all that alchemy, all that shadow work into its next phase of alchemy, which includes metabolizing it in physical form, which in many cases is, like.

I'm literally talking about utilizing spiritual knowing in our, like, lived experience.

So I think what I'm trying to say in this moment is whatever comes up for us when we say utilitarian, I think that is relevant to this moment in time.

Like, where have we been vilifying, negating the Capricornian utilitarian practical in this body, on this planet.

Application of this higher knowing.

Yeah, yeah.

And what I'm.

The picture I'm having from this conversation, too is, like, if we're gonna think about this idea of the mystery of.

Of receiving a gift, a skill, a tool, an idea, and kind of, like, not really knowing why you're going or.

Or a.

You know, an experience, an encounter, maybe it doesn't even feel good, and you don't know why you're going through it until later.

I feel like it's really important to expand time through ancestry and, like, understand that, like, from the deep depths of, like, Capricorn water, you never know what's coming through right now to, like, basically propel something onto land, you know, to move through your life.

That's a mysterious thing.

And I think Jupiter holds that realm.

Yeah, I love that even with the, like, it's Capricorn, but it's also like Jupiter's the part of me that trusts that however we're here, it's like deeply mysterious.

And what comes through us, like, we've been given a lot.

We're learning how to love ourselves enough to acknowledge it and live it.

Does what you're talking about right now feel connected in any possibly articulable way to this transit that we've been sitting in and that we have for the first bit of 20, 26 of Jupiter in Cancer?

Yeah, I think it's maybe even feeling true just kind of in this moment we're talking.

But it's fascinating.

Jupiter is exalted here and I have seen a fecundity and a generosity of care move through it and ripple into the field.

Meanwhile, I've also been.

This has been a fourth house experience for me and massaging my Mars chart ruler.

I've been moving through so much debris in my lineages both with the living and the non living.

That has been hard.

It's been so hard.

And it's like, I feel like that's also Jupiter.

And some of those squares from the energy of square with Saturn has also made it really hard to see.

What are you trying to help me see?

It's just like the friction of like only getting so much information and sometimes feeling connected to a meaning but not being able to understand what it's telling you.

And I, I feel like it's.

I felt a lot of feeling lost.

Not in the sense of losing trust in the process, but just like some kind of deep exhaustion around.

What.

What are you.

What are we learning?

There's something, okay, there's something interesting for me here that the phrase coming up for me is like non specificity.

And I'm seeing a connection to.

I'm seeing a connection to.

Okay, I lost it.

I was like, let me see.

Let me try to name all the threads before I lose them, but I've already lost some of them.

But that's okay.

The one that I'm feeling into, that I was feeling into the most that I thought I would start with is Jupiter's exaltation in Cancer, which you mentioned.

And if we think about the Pisces version of Jupiterianism, it's a very non specific thing.

Right?

Like there is no specificity in Pisces.

Jupiter's signs are opposite Mercury's signs, Mercury's are a lot more specific, detail oriented.

Jupiter is very big picture.

Connect to Cancer.

A lot is in this kind of existential, dready way.

My only Cancer placement is Chiron and Cancer is my eighth house.

So subjective relationship to Cancer.

And when I have had my moments of like being initiated into cancer essence and distillation, I've had this really intense feeling of like existential depression that kind of came from moving through like a really distilled connection to the first four signs of the zodiac and then getting to Cancer and feeling like something was complete there.

Like I've met fire, I've met Earth, I've met air, and now I've met water with Cancer.

I have such a connection to the concept of matrix with Cancer.

I remember when I learned that this was in high school when I was taking a Latin class.

And I learned that matrix and mother come from the same root Latin word, right?

And so cancer, womb, mother, lineage, ancestry, matrix, like this womb of this realm of incarnation.

And then I move through.

I'm gonna sprinkle thoughts right now when I come back to this idea of moving through the four elements.

When I got to Cancer, I was like, that's it, that's everything.

When I've really immersed myself in each of the elements, those are the elements of this reality, of this plane of consciousness in this form.

That's everything.

And so I met this like edge that I now visualize as like the edge of the womb, the edge of the Matrix.

When I met Cancer really deeply.

And there was a grief in that, there was like a sadness in that, that was like, why go on?

And I felt like in my having these moments of emotional alchemy where I really felt I was meeting and being initiated into the depths of cancer, I remember having this sense of understanding of what that the Cancerian people in my life are carrying, that I am not always very viscerally connected to.

And it gave me this real sense of compassion.

And I also understand it in more simple and maybe digestible terms than I've talked about it so far.

I also understand this same essence in the nature of parenting and motherhood.

As a parent, you're watching your child have an experience for the first time that delights them or that hurts them.

And you have this perspective of like, this actually doesn't matter that much, but yet you have to sit there.

Not have to.

You want to, you know, sit there and hold them in that, but you know that it actually doesn't matter.

And so that same sentiment feels similar to How I think about this kind of existentialism of Cancer, of none of this actually matters that much.

All of these experiences are part of the womb, space and the matrix and they're all sacred, but they don't have where we get to next in Leo.

This sense of.

But now I'm gonna apply my will, my unique consciousness to this matrix.

And so Leo kind of busts through.

The ego comes back with a renewed sense of purpose.

But it has to meet, I think also a fractal consciousness.

When I'm in Cancer, it's all the.

And anyways, there's this feeling I see in Cancer sometimes.

And maybe you relate to this, maybe not.

You're in Aries Rising, but it is Mars in fall and Cancer.

So maybe there's an existential push and pull here for you.

I see this unimpressed nature in Cancer sometimes that can't really impress me because I've seen it all before.

I also have come to this through thinking about how we put so much stock on Saturn as an authority.

But then I remember thinking about this once, that by the time Saturn makes one full rotation, the moon has done it almost 400 times or something.

So there's this kind of knowing in Cancer that's like quiet, you know, it's like, I'm not gonna like show off, but I already know that.

And then there can be this kind of like sadness to it.

So I knew I wanted to talk about this a little bit in this episode because it's so core to how I think about cancer and also how I think about Leo as the next phase, like kind of busting out of this existentialism.

But I felt an opportunity to bring it in there.

And I felt a conn to what you were saying with this, okay, Jupiter's exaltation in Cancer, and for you it's activating your fourth house and your Mars.

So it feels very specifically challenging maybe for you.

And I think it has felt specifically challenging for me too with what I named like 8th House and Chiron.

But I think there's something to the non specificity of it.

Is that part of the wisdom of Jupiter in Cancer is that all of the understanding and faith and perspective that we get to gain in this particular Jupiter transit is not actually about what it's about to be about with Jupiter in Leo.

Maybe it's about contending to and acknowledging karma in a way and connectivity.

And there is this feeling of nothing matters.

That much that I feel like has been part of.

Of the journey here.

And I've said this A lot already in this series.

But one of my go to phrases to feel into cancer is that Ram Dass quote, we're all just walking each other home and Ram Dass was a cancer rising with Jupiter exalted in the first.

And so that has felt like a huge theme of this transit and of this season is like Jupiter in cancer, showing us that the specifics of the roles that we each play for each other and the specifics of the story have not really been the point.

So the specifics of like, what are you trying to show me?

To bring it back to what you were saying is like, I wonder if that's part of this transit.

It's like, it's not actually about specifics right now.

It's about seeing the connectivity of all the things, seeing the edge of the matrix, seeing fractal consciousness and.

Yeah, I'll pause.

Yeah, it's shocking.

Not shocking.

We're talking about cancer.

I think it's very like.

I don't love the word tender, but yeah, it's.

That's one of the best words for it.

Yeah.

I mean, when I reflect on this last year I have like come into certain spirit guides that have.

Are very ancestral.

And there's been this kind of theme around like, don't you know that we're here to hold you?

We being this like mystery thing.

Non, non specificity through water.

Yeah.

It's not my necessarily my physical mother, you know, like it, we're.

We're setting our sights too short.

Like we, We've got like eons, you know, of.

Of mother of like holding of.

Of the.

The thing that's gotcha, you know, like the thing that's gotcha and is holding you in this, like, in this way that you can lean back into.

That is a very different thing than what's dissolving outside of us as systems or beliefs or like ways of seeing reality that are like not really actually what's got us.

And I feel like there's a kind of dread in it because it's like if I fall back.

Are you sure you're there?

Non specific.

Womb.

Mother.

Yeah.

Divine feminine.

Like you're that.

And that's like the faith.

Right.

And so the connection to Jupiter exalting in Cancer is like there is this, like there's a knowing in Cancer of eternal connectivity.

And.

Yeah.

Like that's all there is, is this like soft, gentle, non specific knowing.

Actually there's not.

Yeah.

There's no hard physical evidence of it.

There's just trust.

Yeah.

So there's something well, and this brings me, I guess also to like Jupiter in Cancer being the final Jupiter transit of the Saturn in Pisces era too.

Because for me, Saturn in Pisces has been so much about radical surrender and trust.

And Pisces is my fourth house, so a lot of excavation for me as well.

And yeah, I think it's interesting with Trines and with water Trines.

There's something so specific with these water Trines.

Jupiter and Saturn kind of, they're not outer planets typically in their nature, is to define, I don't know if I've used that word to talk about this before, but yet to kind of define qualities of our actual, more tangible life experience.

I think that's kind of how I think of Jupiter and Saturn, but in these trine relationships to each other.

And I guess we're actually coming out of a square, so we're moving into a Trine.

So I think I'm talking very explicitly about the last bit of 2025, the first bit of 2026, where Saturn's in Pisces and Jupiter's in Cancer.

There's been this emphasis on these two planets working together and being in harmony with each other and supporting each other's process, but very Paschean, Cancerian, watery, intangible way.

So final stage of alchemizing, of integrating is a better word, whatever.

The last bit of time has shown us about our relationship to trust and faith and connectivity.

Yeah, there's been something about this last bit that's felt harder for me, I think since Saturn got back into Pisces maybe.

I think I was enjoying the tension of the square, actually, I was enjoying the momentum.

It was feeling a bit more at the surface and tangible and action oriented.

And then when Saturn went back into Pisces, it kind of came for me.

I didn't realize it until Saturn had been back into Pisces for a while that I was feeling helpless.

Whereas for most of the Saturn in Pisces transit, I don't think I felt helpless.

I think I was for most of it really embracing the lesson of surrender in a way that actually felt really empowering.

And then this last little bit, it felt like the painstaking, like, oh, I just have to trust again.

So, yeah, I haven't really thought about this until right now, but there's been a real demand is what it feels like, a real demand to release into the non specificity of the blessing, the non specificity of the generosity, the non specificity of the trust.

Yeah, yeah.

I feel like Jupiter in Leo is Gonna feel completely different.

And those trines in fire are gonna feel completely different.

But we don't have to jump there.

No, I mean, we should.

Unless you have more on Jupiter in Cancer.

I feel like I'm looking for a more specific way to talk about Jupiter in Cancer and talking about how the point is non specificity.

So maybe that's my lesson in this moment.

Well, I think the moo, it's almost like.

What I, what I see in the Jupiter and Leo is like bringing the energy of how, how our ancestors want us to feel about ourselves, which is like, like proud and like ready to share ourselves with everyone.

And I think for most of us that may feel a little confronting, because I do think Leo is very, very confronting for most of us because of shame.

So I don't know how easeful it will be unless we've like, moved through layers of shame to get in touch with that solar nature that shares oneself freely and abundantly.

What that brings up for me in this moment is this concept that I've been thinking about and talking about a lot lately of spontaneity versus compulsion.

And.

What'S feeling relevant right now about it, at least in terms of articulating a little more clearly.

What I mean by spontaneity and compulsion is that behaviors on the surface can look exactly the same when coming from a place of spontaneity, which I would maybe describe also as being autonomous and free and honest and real versus compulsion, which I would maybe elaborate on as being like, habituated, distorted, unconsciously motivated by shadow.

And we can feel really removed without awareness, without discernment.

We can feel very removed from which of those things we're acting upon because like I said, the, the actual behavior, the actual action, the actual language can look exactly the same, but be resourced from a completely different place.

And so that concept that I've been looking at a lot lately in myself and in the world came up for me, hearing you talk about Jupiter moving into this solar orientation and Jupiter moving into Leo, because I was thinking about how.

Yeah, you brought up.

Did you bring up, up pride?

Yeah, yeah, pride.

And I was thinking about how there is this quality with Leo of like, pride and will and like, ego and wanting to shine and wanting recognition, wanting acknowledgment, wanting to radiate, wanting to show off.

And I think because Pluto's in Aquarius right now, and because the nodes are going to be in, in Aquarius, Leo, the south node's gonna be in particular, the south node's gonna be in Leo.

We're really due for a collective and individual recalibration around our experience of pride and radiance and generosity and sacred reciprocity.

I've been starting to really feel into sacred reciprocity across the Leo Aquarius axis.

And so I'm thinking about how with Pluto in Aquarius, with Jupiter in the south node, moving into Leo in the same year, there's going to be two different versions of connecting to that energy that will exist on the planet.

And both will exist within each of us as a compulsive one and a spontaneous, free one.

One that's coming from ultimately a lack of belief in our inherent worth.

One that's coming sourced from shame.

That's coming, like, compulsive pride, fake pride.

Like, yeah, icky ego.

Can't find a better word right now.

And then one that's coming from a sense of, like, real grounded pride pride from, like, spontaneous pride pride.

Because we've done all of the emotional alchemy, attunement of these water transits and can show up in this clear sense of, I want what's mine, the recognition that's mine, and I want to be generous with that.

So that's what I started to feel into just now.

Like, what is.

Yeah, there's gonna be such a different.

There's gonna be lots of different ways to tap into the exuberance and the radiance and the generosity and the ego, you know, like, there's ego in Leo.

Leo is about the ego.

And there's lots of different ways to be in relationship to ego.

Yeah.

I've learned so much from having children here.

And my Saturn is in Leo.

Just a little context.

And then twelfth House sun.

Leo hasn't always been.

Ego has kind of been a learning experience.

But, like, I tap into them when they would, like, put costumes on as little kids and, like, parade around the house like.

Like.

Or just, like, be really proud about the stuff they pulled out of their drawers and put on.

And you're just like, smiling to yourself, like, delighted at feeling the experience of witnessing them.

Makes me happy for them that they just love themselves.

Like, you know, like, oh, my God, yeah, you.

Or like.

Like when they would be.

We would be singing the birthday song.

And they're just like, delighting in everybody singing for them.

And it's like there was only a little window of time.

Like when they were little, really little, they were overwhelmed by that.

And then.

Then be.

They eventually hit a place of self consciousness where it was a little weird to be sung to.

But that period in the middle where it was like, yeah, my birthday.

And it's like the cutest thing for everyone to experience, you know, Like, I feel like that is the energy of like this big exuberant heart who's like, here I am feeling myself.

Like, I'm feeling myself.

And it feels good to share it with you, but, like, take it or leave it.

I'm feeling me.

So how you feel about it is your experience of me.

Okay, that is exactly where I was.

Like, okay, I'm starting to feel into the Cancer stuff in the.

Into the LEO is like, if we look at this deep knowing and understanding and integrated awareness, maybe a way of talking about Jupiter of Cancer through this idea of we're all just walking each other home.

One of the lessons for me of this season and I'm Jupiter ruled.

And I've been in a Jupiter year for this first part of Jupiter in Cancer.

It's like something I did already know, but I've had no shortages of opportunities to really see how much this touches everything in life.

This idea of whatever looking at you brings up in me is mine.

Basically this idea that all of life is a projection field.

Right.

And again, this is my eighth house.

And I think about the eighth house as having to do with a lot of projection in relationship lives.

What's mine, what's mine in the second, what's ours in the eighth.

And kind of the fogginess of like, I don't know, like, who's the real Britain, not the one I see.

Right.

Like, you're just playing a role for me to experience reality.

Right.

And so this is how I've been anchoring a lot to Jupiter in Cancer is like, none of the specifics matter.

Right.

Because if I'm working with someone or if I'm having some kind of issue, whatever the relationship is, whether it's something that a teacher is bringing up in me or something that working with a student is bringing up with me, something in my relationship to my mom, something in a stranger on the Internet, like, whatever it is showing up, that's something for me.

It always comes back to, that is something for me to alchemize.

That's one of the ways I've been really feeling into Jupiter in Cancer is we're all just walking each other home.

And you brought up the fecundity of care and generosity of care.

And I thought that's such a beautiful thing that I've also experienced with Jupiter in Cancer.

I've really felt, seen and recognized and valued and celebrated in a way that I have been craving to over this last season, but not in the way that my mind has wanted it.

There has been so much surrender that has then put me in a position of being able to actually feel the quiet resource and care and reciprocity and recognition that I've been craving.

But I did have to kind of like, the specific thing is coming up again.

I had to release a grasp on the specifics of how that care and reciprocity would show up to me.

And then I was able to receive it.

And.

So, okay, I think there was something around like once we, yeah, okay, once we can really relax into that, we're all just walking each other home.

That the specifics don't necessarily matter.

That, okay, in this exchange, maybe you're the teacher, I'm the student.

In this exchange, maybe I'm the teacher, you're the student.

In this exchange, maybe as a fifth line, we know I play the role of like the knowledgeable hero.

And in this one I play the role of like the asshole.

And when there's a real understanding, like, of the karmic implications of it all, we're all just walking each other home, like, this is all roleplay, then I can surrender into that, like, exuberant pride of Leo, of this is my role with a little bit less or maybe a lot less like shame and baggage of having to do it right or worrying like the thing you brought up of like there's this little window of at first it was overwhelming and then it was fun.

And then self consciousness came online.

Like, that is so core to understand about the essence of Leo.

I think that we talk about like the performance, the performative nature of it.

And I think it can be that like kind of bold feeling of, oh, they're watching.

So let me put on a show.

But it's not always that.

Sometimes it's like, oh, they're watching.

And that feels like incredibly debilitating the self consciousness of the awareness of the eyes on me.

So that's where I'm starting to feel into what has this alchemy of Jupiter in Cancer, especially Trine, Saturn in Pisces, and just surrendering to whatever the role is that I'm playing that you're playing and looking for the spiritual significance, the bigger picture significance of it rather than the specificity.

There's something in that surrender that I feel like, like May for some of us resource a stepping into the light with Jupiter in Leo that's less obsessive in like getting it right or being good right.

Less the shame has less of A hold on us.

Because we understand that if I'm going to go out there and shine, some people are going to squint.

And that's not my problem.

Actually, it's not.

It's.

Yeah.

Yes to everything here.

I think that my parenting completely shifted gears in the last couple years when I started bringing unshaming to my parenting and just completely surrendered to, like, what if how my daughters feel about me as their mother.

Am I a good mother or a bad mother?

Mother is like 1000% for them.

I could never begin to know or get involved in that.

So if it's completely out of my control, how do I want to show up to my parenting?

I love that.

Yes.

And.

And then it's just like, oh, I want it to be like this.

I want it to feel like this.

To me.

This is exactly how I feel.

That transition from first trimester, Like, I got kind of lost in it, but that kind of existential dread of, oh, it's all a matrix.

Oh, it's all out of my control.

Oh, it's all been done before.

Then when you surrender to that, then that Leo can come through as like, okay, if that, then what?

Like, exactly that.

It's like when you contend with the limitations of inevitability, of matrix, of fractal, of repetition, of the eternity, then Leo, it's only from that, like, void and that surrender that Leo can come through with its ego and be like, okay, it's all been done before, but not like this is.

And that's where that, like, conscious will comes online.

And it's just more fun then.

And playful, which is Leo too.

Yeah.

And.

And you're then co creating what, what it.

What, what is meaning now?

It's the thing you're like, co creating with your contract with reality, which is that, you know, you're in your own trip and everyone's in their own thing.

And you can co create what it means to bring in Jupiter with your contract with reality.

Love that.

Yep.

Yes.

Co create what it means.

And I think.

Okay, I also think one of the things I'm thinking about with Jupiter in Leo is like coming back to how I talked about SAG earlier.

With the fire, it's like, what does it mean for me?

And with Leo, it's fixed fire.

Leo remains so tethered to the part of truth, truth that is actually kind of our unrelatability.

So coming from water, where everything is so connected and the specifics don't matter because none of it matters because we're talking about, you know, with our most matured, we might say it's a circle, not a line.

But with our most matured sign being Pisces, where there are no specifics because there is no separation.

Every transition from water to fire is now it gets very specific.

It gets very specific about my individual experience.

Yeah, I mean it makes me think of the sun just kind of like over there being the sun, like we're over here.

But it.

Thank you.

Like we appreciate how we're alive because of you.

There's this like self responsibility that is only, that is like especially available I think in the fire signs because and maybe Leo especially being fixed fire that like I always think with Leo, you know, the world does, the universe doesn't revolve around you.

Leo's like, yes, actually it does.

And there's actually a generosity in that.

I, I, I just.

Okay, I, I wrote in my phone note the other day wondering if I might do some writing on this, but maybe this is where it wants to come out.

It's not easy for other people to hold your self hatred with you.

Woo.

You may think you're doing me a favor by editing yourself, but I can feel that self harm and it hurts me too.

And it puts an onus of responsibility on me.

Right, so there's like you were talking about in parenting.

If I don't have any control over it, then how do I want it to be experienced?

Like it's not for you to protect your children from their own subjective experience.

Yeah, right.

And so like with all this energy moving into the fire signs and with Jupiter specifically our means of understanding as a treat.

Understanding as a treat.

I just love that new phrase.

It's like can you own your subjective understanding for yourself and not run away from it and not repress it because nobody else is here for that story.

You're the one here for that story.

And when you try to repress your own subjective experience, your own subjective reality, the truth of your own solar central nature in your own life, all that's actually doing is putting more responsibility on someone else and taking away someone else's agency to experience you from the seat of the center of their own solar system.

See, I'm just so excited for fire transits.

I'm getting tired of.

Yeah.

And you know, I think there for the people in the world who are really holding that are like the intuitive empathic people who like sense someone like really needs to be validated.

They don't see themselves and like so much heavy lifting is happening to help help one another, prop each other Up.

I feel like we.

When we understand that self love and living from that place is how we care take our.

How we take care of our relationships with each other.

Like it's.

It is a service to everyone around us for us to have our own background facts and to know what's magical about us.

Which is why I mean I teach in Unshaming youg Chart that unshaming the sun is like the core one.

Yeah.

Cause it just really is of the chart.

So it's like no small thing.

But it has huge effects.

I think that is scary to hold the responsibility of how the fact of our impact in the world.

But we do impact everyone around us.

Yeah.

Earlier I was like when you start shining, someone's going to start squinting.

Right.

Which credit to.

I don't know, I can't remember their name.

But I watched a video on the Chinese zodiac earlier this year.

Year.

I'll link that person's YouTube channel because they said that in their video about snake folk like myself in this year.

And that phrase obviously stuck with me.

And it feels very leonine, Leonian in nature.

But after I said it earlier, inspired by your example of kind of getting out of the way in parenthood and choosing the experience that you want to have for you, the levity of that in not over controlling, over micromanaging which is very shadow cancer.

Right.

Like I have to protect you.

And therefore then it becomes this control thing.

I had written down like when you start shining some people are gonna squint.

But I also wrote down like you might even hurt someone.

And that's this other piece of it that I feel like there's something here with the Leo Aquarius access to and the nodes going in there and Pluto in Aquarius that feels connected to this.

I won't try to get too into it right now, but kind of yeah.

Like this theme of altruism that we like sacrifice ourselves and we think it's because we're protecting someone else.

But like that's not actually like we're still.

That's still self serving.

Right.

And so like who do we think we are that we think we could at a certain point reach some kind of like status or something.

Awareness, purity that we won't hurt someone.

So it's not even actually about like this.

And this is like a kind of a newer thing that's been coming coming up in my system is like taking responsibility for yourself and prioritizing your own subjective reality is not just about like unleashing your own highest potential.

It's there's also something humbling in it about, like.

Yeah, it's not.

I am like, in this cancerian matrix where we're all just constantly playing a role for each other, walking each other home along this matrix of karma, there are gonna be things that I do that hurt people.

Like, and.

And whether it's because I did something morally or ethically wrong or not is actually an irrelevant question.

Actually, that's been a hard lesson for me.

A lot of my, like, undefined AJNA programming lives in this, like, well, I have to get pristine.

I have to be in integrity because I don't want to do it wrong.

And if.

If I know people are gonna project on, then I'm going to, as Taylor Swift would say, keep my side of the street clean.

So that when those projections come, I feel like, fortified against them.

And like, that has been an important part of my process.

And there's a lot of truth in that.

And also, like, if I am divested enough from the binary of good, bad, right, wrong, then the question of, did I actually do something wrong?

Becomes irrelevant.

And I can surrender to the fact that, like, I will do things that hurt people, I will do things that challenge people, both for good and for bad.

And even then, it is actually not ultimately my responsibility to, like, avoid that reality.

So there's just, just this other little, like, dimension and nuance to it that I feel like I'm coming up against that is like, it's not just about me feeling free to shine.

It's also about me embracing the other side of that, like, audacity and radiance and pride and self love.

That is the humility that, like, even then I will, quote, make a mistake or overstep or, like, cause harm.

Like, actually part of my impact will be someone else experiencing harm.

That will happen sometimes.

And I can't avoid even that.

Yeah, I mean, one of the ways shame shows up is in like, perfectionism and like, seeking problemlessness to.

It's a hype.

It's hyper vigilance against causing anything, any.

Any problems, any errors, anything.

And I think that the sun really need.

The solar in us needs to be free to see that like Virgo comes after it's all connected.

We are here to learn.

We.

We are willing to learn.

Like, oops, I'm gonna learn.

I'm gonna adapt, I'm gonna shift, I'm gonna repair.

I'm gonna be the person on the other side of sharing myself, who will be with whatever comes up in that.

Sharing, yes, having my own back, but also being willing to Learn and what happens when we're afraid to share ourselves because we don't.

One in case we do it imperfectly is we just don't.

And then we're silent.

And I just don't see how that helps, helps the, the ecosystem.

We have so many loud people out there who like just went ahead and took the mic and like, yeah, okay, can we get all the like really well meaning human people to also get their mics and not need to be perfect?

I love that.

That's like.

That is what I'm getting at with the compulsive LEO versus spontaneous leo, integrated integrity LEO versus seeking attention, seeking power, seeking control.

There's something to me with LEO that can also be the shadow willfulness can also be kind of controlling.

I was really.

Yeah.

When you named hypervigilance.

I'm a natal south node in virgo in the 10th.

So for me, the question of this perfectionism around not wanting to harm, not wanting to impact negatively, this is very core to my process.

Very sensitive, very tender for me, very personal for me, me.

And one of the questions I've been asking myself a lot lately in the last like six or seven months as I've been, I kind of had a period of hermitude.

You've met me in this period, Britain.

I moved to the desert, to my Pluto in Scorpio on the Ascendant line.

And I've just been like, I pulled way back from community.

I've been way more in isolation, way less social than the version of me I knew my whole life up until that point point five and a half years ago.

And I've just been like deconditioning, doing shadow work, being in a solo era.

And then over the last year I've started to dip my toe more into like collaborative spaces and being.

Coming back into being like perceived a little more.

And I've had to be asking myself this question as I've been.

I kind of described it as like, I'm a second line, but I'm putting myself through some third line experiences lately.

But I'm really sensitive.

Like as a second line body.

I don't have, have that natural resilience of like, all right, let me bump into some stuff.

But I could feel I needed that for where I'm going.

It was time for me to create a laboratory to bump into things.

And that's what a lot of my work and life has looked like in the last bit.

And so as I've been bumping into things and looking as I'm having my nodal Return.

As we're all going through the south node in Virgo Transit and looking at where we've been hypervigilant collectively, I've been having this question for myself of like, where is the line between care and hypervigilance?

And I don't have an answer.

And it is not obvious.

And it's like I don't always know whether what I'm doing is coming like from care or hypervigilance.

And actually there's a lot of both, I think.

But I went, oh wow, a few minutes ago when you were speaking, because when you brought it up, I can't remember if you like.

No, I don't think you directly named it, but I just had this moment where you're talking about all these like deeply empathic people who are like not stepping up.

And then we have these other people who compulsively sourced by Shadow are stepping up and like quote, running the world.

And yeah, there's something really big there that's feeling, that's really moving me that I'm feeling overwhelmed by in the moment.

But I had this thought when the phrase the familiar question came up to me of where's the line between care and hypervigilance?

I had this moment where I was like, I wonder if that line is like the cancer Leo cusp and thinking about Jupiter in the moon sign in Cancer.

There is so much care there.

But then when does that care cross the line into hyper vigilance such that it doesn't allow us to live this open heart, heart led, exuberant, radiant life?

And so yeah, there's just like a new dimension of how I'm feeling into these two back to back transits of Jupiter in Cancer and Jupiter in LE is like, well, in my go to phrase for Chiron in Aries, which is.

A backdrop for all of this, is.

Where have you been abandoning yourself for fear of being abandoned by the other?

So this is just like very in the collective right now.

Is this taking self responsibility, clearing codependency?

And it's like, can we trust the goodness of our own intention and heart?

Can we trust the reality and the presence of the care that we move through the world with enough to like step outside of that hypervigilance?

Enough to trust that even when my shine has impact, that is not desired, even then it was resourced by care.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I think so much unskillful Leo is from not having metabolized the cancer lessons.

The cancer miracle of like, don't you know that you are held?

Because if you don't know, go, you're gonna go strain and get it.

Get the whatever it is that you want to fill you up from your environment.

And that doesn't look so good and feel so good.

So I do think there's like something really powerful we're learning about self care that's coming from a bigger place of care being the place from which we all come.

It's just harder to know it because we weren't trained in like the proper rituals.

Many of us weren't, not everyone, but many of us were like, weren't initiated properly and understanding this that I think that.

But many have been really sincerely in the hermitages in their healing, in the repair for many years now.

So I do think a lot of human beings are positioned to really thrive in the Jupiter and Leo from Saturn and Aries.

I do think that little July window is going to be kind of bumpy where Jupiter's just in to Leo immediately.

Sextiles, Chiron and Taurus.

New in Taurus and then later that month exactly opposes Pluto, Trines, Neptune and Sextiles, Uranus and Gemini.

And then like a week later, the sun comes to Jupiter and there's like a full moon in Aquarius.

Aquarius.

It's kind of a wild little window there where there may be some little bumping around to help us like get initiated into the next phase of things.

But I mean, I do feel that I have a Jupiterian approach to outer planets as well as all aspects of the chart that I do feel that there are.

They're rooting for us if we're willing to see where they.

How they are and what.

Just so much goodness.

I. Yeah, I keep having.

I keep having like, eureka moments while you're talking.

And then when it's my turn to talk, it's gone.

Yeah.

I'm like, what will it be?

I don't know.

Willing.

Willing to see.

Like that phrase.

Phrase that they're rooting for us.

But no, specifically willing to see.

Felt like it was catching a vibe that I've been getting through talking to you about Jupiter in Leo.

Yeah, that's what made me go, ugh.

That phrase willing to see.

It was like connecting a lot of dots.

But yeah, I did mean to cut you off.

I just really like that phrase.

Yeah.

And I honestly didn't know this, but I recently learned that I guess Aries rules the eyes too.

I always thought of like the forehead, head.

The head, like the brow.

But I hadn't included the eyes in that.

Interesting.

I don't know if that's true, but I heard it thrown around in the memes.

You know, I knew head as well, but from a human design perspective.

In The Ajna, gates 17 and 11 are the eyes.

And 17 I know, is an Aries gate because it's my son, and 11 is a Sag gate because it's my moon.

Oh, wow.

And that makes sense to me, at least what I know about gate 17.

And I guess you could say the Ajna in general has kind of like a third eye sort of feel to it.

But anyways, yeah.

I was thinking like, willing to see, as in like Sagittarius is I see.

Right.

And so Jupiter I see.

And then like in Leo being the light, like shining a light light, like willing to see the light, but also willing to see it.

This thing I keep coming back to is like willing to acknowledge your own subjective reality instead of suppressing it out of a fake altruistic desire to serve the other, which is really just you being unwilling to contend to the discomfort it brings up in your own system when you think about disappointing or hurting another.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, I, it just seems so true that like everything solar related, the, the, the support is back over in moon related.

Things like learning to hold our feelings.

Yeah.

Just like at a base level, like.

Yeah.

What I like to think about though is that we are so lucky we get to have feelings.

Like we came to planet Earth to be humans to have feelings.

Like we get to have feelings.

We were so ashamed about our feelings, we've been made to be embarrassed by our feelings, made to feel weak because we have feelings.

But like we get that feel.

I and, and all of our intuitive psychic gifts come from our connection to our feelings.

So it's, it is the coolest.

It's just that we've been so.

We're also unskilled.

Like people are just walking around unskilled.

And I put it that way because it's not a character defect.

It's just.

It was a lack of communal parenting.

You know, it was like a lack of care from, from institutions and schools and communities.

I wrote down unskillful when you said it because I could feel, I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, but I could feel that there was a very intentional use of that word and that you've thought about it before.

And it made me think about, you know, I personally, for my own system of like my undefined Ajna being where a lot of, Where I get led astray a lot is like overthinking, doing it the right way.

So personally, it tends to behoove me to not like, worry too much about the particular impact of a particular phrasing until I have my own moment of like, oh, this might be better because otherwise I get pulled really into like guilt and not self stuff.

But anyway, so when you said unskilled, Leo, I had this moment of like.

That's a very intentional and helpful word.

And I can tell that you have put intention into your use of that word.

And it made me think about how my compulsion is to say shadow side of a sign.

And I had this whole moment listening to that specific and helpful word.

And it made me.

I'm curious if you want to say anything about your process with that, because knowing that so much of your work is about unshaming, and I'm thinking about like, I don't intend to shame people when pointing out that there are shadow sides of things, but I imagine that using the word shadow carries a particular baggage to it.

So, yeah, I was just curious if you wanted to say anything more about unskilled.

But it also made me think about the shadow.

What it actually is is like a lack of self understanding.

Right.

And so the skill then comes from maybe not only being willing, but resourced also to see the light.

Yeah, A lot of lack of skill is just having been in conditions and circumstances where you didn't have access to tools to give you these skills, you know, like to teachers to give you these skills, to have role models to embody these skills, you know.

And honestly, one of my very first astrological texts, because I was an autodidact for like a year and a half before I took a class class, I bought the workbook Astrology for Yourself by Demetra George and Douglas Block.

And you use the workbook to learn about your chart.

And she grouped the qualities of signs, planets, houses into skillful and unskillful.

So it just kind of landed early that I was like, I love the way that sounds because skill is a thing that you can grow, but you have to have to be the one who gives yourself that agency.

You have to take responsibility.

You have to be like, I'm going.

To go learn this growth mindsetarian.

What's that?

I said growth, mindset.

How Jupiterian?

Yeah, totally.

Like, if you do you need re.

Are you resourced?

Do you want more resources?

Like we have resources in this world?

So much is available at, at the, at the cost of your time and energy, but at, at no cost, financial cost, to become more resourced.

A lot of these, the things we most need right now are cancer related because they're moon related.

And it's like skill set and feeling is.

I think like people all the time are like, Britain, how did you.

Da da, da, da, da.

And everything is like just being in my feelings with my inner children.

But that actually does also take me back to Chiron and torture Taurus, since I.

Mine's at 2, I think.

And like somatic healing techniques, like, have absolutely changed my life, like so many people.

And that's.

Those are skills.

It's not like we're born with the ability to be in tune with our bodies.

We're guided what we come here to figure out, which is not unrelated from what you said about we're lucky to have feelings like this.

Life is a discovery of what it is to live in a physical and energy and emotional body.

Yes, yes.

And from a Jupiterian perspective, it's like, wow, we're so lucky.

It's true, though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was getting really lit up too.

I know we're rounding the corner here.

I was getting really lit up when you started bringing in the transits because, yeah, I think I feel really good about that.

We took more of a big picture approach, in part because that's Jupiter's nature and in part because my intention for the series was to invite people to be in real presence relationship to the transits this year.

And so I think focusing in on like, oh, we're gonna have this summer, where Jupiter immediately ingresses.

And when I was looking, I was like, whoa, that feels really big.

And part of me would be excited to talk about it if we had more time or if I had more bandwidth, which I don't.

But yeah, just like, go ahead.

I just wanna underline that that at the moment of Jupiter's ingress, the whole time it's been in cancer, it's been by sign square to Chiron.

And they're getting closer and closer and closer once Jupiter turns around.

But they don't actually hit that square till they're in the fixed signs.

And then just like Britain said right after that, all these planets are at 4 degrees.

We have Uranus, Neptune, Jupiter, and I think Pluto.

Pluto's the other one all at four degrees.

So there's this fix and it's gonna be really intense.

And I think what feels good is to point that out right now because I feel like what this conversation has done for me and will hopefully have done for listeners is really attune people to what they have been feeling and being in process with around their relationship to Themselves in relation to lineage and ancestry and the other.

And kind of preparing for this shift in the latter half of the year into Jupiter and Leo and like surrendering into that, that.

And I think, yeah, what feels relevant in this moment is like it's gonna feel a really particular way right at first.

And there's probably gonna be a lot going on in the collective unfolding at that moment.

And these bigger picture themes that you and I have danced around with Jupiter in Cancer as a setup for Jupiter in Leo are still more the point.

So in the moments of all of that, whatever that chaos might be with the Uranus ingress and all of those hard, fixed signs, squares and oppositions, whatever is happening there, there is still a bigger process unfolding, which the first thing I wrote down that you said, something larger that I can't see.

Right.

And so the medicine of Jupiter is to remain in connection to that something larger that we can't see.

And so if we can, during whatever comes up that summer, for people on the collective scale or the individual scale, if there's a way to remain connected to, to the shift in particular that you're feeling with the transition of Jupiter from Cancer to Leo and remain connected to that bigger picture unfolding, there might be some specific medicine in that too, to be present with in a non repressive, shaming way.

Your subjective reality in the face of whatever.

Whatever that is over the summer.

Yeah, yeah.

It's like it'll take a long time to play out what it means, you know, so it's just a.

It's a step in the story.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Hey, thank you so much.

What do you want to share with folks about what you have going on right now?

Remind me when this might come out.

Sometime and like, it's February 10th, day of recording, like within seven to ten days at most.

Probably within a week.

Week.

Okay, cool.

Well, I have a huge thing coming up, my spring offering, the Magician's Table.

Jonathan has participated, who was a previous guest in the series.

It's for those of you who may be readers, intuitives, space holders who want to workshop an offering that's kind of wanting to come through you, but it feels weird to charge.

You want to practice.

That's like the technical thing that it does, but it actually is just a really, really powerful space to meet yourself in a new way.

Speaking of solar, it's really about reflecting your gifts back to you so you can understand the impact of your presence on other people, which is really beautiful.

And let's clear those distortions.

Hmm, sounds like, perfect.

Jupiter and Leo Prep.

Yeah, totally.

Absolutely.

Cool.

And then I'll share that link in the show notes and link to Britain.

Yeah.

Applications open February 22nd and then it starts mid March.

Perfect.

Cool.

And, yeah, check out Britain's podcast.

It's a beautiful collection of Jupiterian and Saturnian insights.

Saturn's here, too.

Thank you.

Cool.

Thank you so much.

Yay, Sam.