Foreign.

Welcome to the Own youn Choices on youn Life podcast.

I know you are here wanting to change and rewrite your story.

You are desiring to step into the impact that you know you were here to create.

I am here to guide you with the proven tools and strategies used by myself and our speakers to support you in taking radical responsibility in your life and learning how to own your choices to change your story.

My name is Marcia Van Winesburg.

I am a storytelling business coach, master NLP trainer, speaker, podcaster, and seven times published author.

My clients have found freedom and purpose from overcoming their shame stories and learning how to share them with the world.

I am so grateful you are here.

Let's get started.

Foreign.

Welcome back to the show.

This is an unplanned part two of myself and sue talking about all things publishing.

When we finished the episode, we realized that there were some key pieces that we still wanted to share.

So here you go.

Here's part two.

We found, like, there's a piece of editing that we didn't really share and the piece of the process of working with the authors that I think we do differently.

And, you know, it's not just about the story.

It's in my thought process.

It's like, how can that author shine in their story?

How can we see more of them?

And so I was just recently working with one of our collaborative authors, and some of those conversations are some of the hardest to have because I have to speak in a sense of like, we have to make some changes.

And we make changes not because it's not good enough, but because it could actually be better if there's so two different things.

And I know that we're not shining enough of the story of the author.

I want them to shine.

I want them to shine and to come across.

So this one in particular was not an easy conversation to have because I don't ever want to hurt anyone's feelings.

I'm not ever coming across that way.

But I knew that there was a way.

And it took a lot of going through it.

We actually had to get on a call to break it down and see what the point and the intention were.

And something that was, you know, kind of a bomb dropping came out in our conversation.

And I was like, that actually has to be included in your chapter.

And all of a sudden it's like it cracked it open.

And we saw it differently and realized that there was some very key missing parts to her chapter that we wanted to share.

And that's all part of, you know, editing and helping to bring that story to life.

Yeah.

And if you hadn't gone through that process, that discovery might not have come through.

And so.

And now it's going to be the most powerful element of her chapter.

It is.

A hundred percent.

Yeah.

I was working with one of the other authors as well, and her story.

It's different when authors.

Okay, so they've never written before.

Yeah.

Published before.

And we, you know, talk about.

Just speak it out sometimes you record it and you transcribe, and then you pull what you want, and then that's when you write it and make sense of it and organize it.

So I think that's what she did, because it sounded like she was talking in it.

But from a reader's perspective, you don't want to be reading something where it feels like they're talking at you.

No.

Right.

And so that was one of the things that the developmental editor was able to do.

She was able to change the writing, but keep the same ideas, same point, same everything.

Same tone, even, but switch it from.

In a different tense so that when you're reading it, you just feel like you're engulfed in the story.

And so I met with this author.

She knew it was in developmental editing, but she's never gone through it before.

And so I didn't share it with her before our call because I was like, I need to talk to her about it first.

Because I don't want her to think, like, oh, this is, like, totally rewritten.

Because it was.

It is rewritten, but just in a way that it is more impactful for the reader, but keeping the same ideas and the same tone and everything.

So I'm sharing with her that, like, you can reject all of this if you want.

Like, if you read this and you're like, nope, that's not me.

Fine.

That's fine.

Yeah.

No, you get to.

Yeah, you get to.

You get to choose.

But.

And even if you like certain parts, pull those parts out and whatever, like, make it how you want it, it's your chapter.

So framing it that way to her and in all those elements, like, you know, maintaining the tone, just creating a little bit better of a reader's experience of her story, I think helps her to understand the process because she's never been edited before.

And I know in hearing other people's experiences with other publishing projects, it could feel offensive.

Right.

Like, if there were.

And we experienced that in our first book where things were edited and our authors were kind of mad.

Yeah.

In that process, like, we weren't involved in any of the backend stuff at all.

So we kind of had to deal with it on our own.

And that was.

That was a hard part.

So at least we have control over that in terms of the process now and the editing.

And it's really nice.

So the client you're talking about and then the one I'm talking about, for them to shift their perspective and whatever it is that they're thinking.

Right.

And it's just really cool to witness that.

I love that you said that, because I forgot how much stories were changed in our first book.

I do.

I mean, it was just.

It was interesting because it's like, I have actually had people say to me, like, do I have to change my story in order to publish it?

And I think this is an important question because.

No, you don't.

I mean, I will be honest.

If you're telling a story from the lens that doesn't serve you best, I will be honest and tell you that.

I will.

Because I want you to look the best possible.

If you're telling it from a lens of, like, angry, frustrated, pointing fingers, blame, judgment, all these pieces, I'd be like, I'm not interested in that, and I don't want you to do it.

It's yucky to a reader to read that.

And we've.

We've done, like.

We've had to do that and change things for some people.

But, yeah, this is a part of the process.

It's.

It's important to share.

And I mean, it's just.

It's a piece of it.

Because I do think we're also here trying to, like, we're learning and we're educating people on what the process is like when you're writing and publishing your book.

Because I just want to see more people do it.

I want to see, like I said, 82% want to write it.

Less than 1% actually do.

Those are like, wicked numbers.

I love how you said earlier about this is going back to when you were talking about outsourcing support for certain parts of your business.

This is how I feel about the publishing process when it comes to editing.

Like, you and I are not book editors.

No, we're not.

No.

We go through every project.

We can identify gaps.

We can identify what needs expansion.

We identify what needs to go.

Because a lot of times there's a lot of removal of things.

Yes.

Because you just said, like, we don't need to be sharing at all.

And especially if it's coming from, like, a negative place.

So you and I, we definitely screen everything, but it's so nice to have

editors who are so great, because I

don't want to do that.

That is hard for me is to edit.

I can be like, oh, I think she should take this out.

Or, oh, I think she could expand on this.

Oh, we need a bridge paragraph in here.

It seems broken.

Like, I can do all of those things, but an editor's job, whether it's technical or developmental, like, it's a skill.

And I even reached out to one of my girlfriends who could be a potential technical editor for us in the future, just to, like, put it in her ear.

She was like, huh?

Yeah.

I mean, I don't like my job that I have right now.

And I was like, yep.

I think with the foundation, we're going to be able to grow in ways we can't see yet.

I really do.

And I. I do.

And I feel like it's going to be a collaborative.

A true collaborative approach.

You, collaboration.

Every part of my business is literally built on collaboration in the most beautiful way.

And that also, in all fairness, there's a lot of times I did collaboration in the beginning that was not a great fit.

You have to learn through the process and the people that I do work with now.

There's years of rapport.

Years of rapport and connection built in every piece that I do with collaboration now.

Isn't it so cool to feel a bigger sense of alignment with people who we're working with and who we have in our circle?

I feel like at this point, whatever, February 2, 2026, feels the most aligned on all angles.

I would agree, actually.

I have not felt this level of.

It doesn't mean we don't have hiccups.

It doesn't mean we don't have challenges.

We.

It's not it at all.

But the alignment piece of, like, even some difficult conversations, being able to, like, you with me, me with you, and, like, having to do those things and sometimes being called out on things that it's like, all right, I'm making.

I'm the problem again.

Like, I'm doing that, and I recognize those things.

But that's the beautiful thing about collaborating.

We start to connect and we can see.

Like, I can't see all those blind spots on my own.

None of us can.

No, no.

You guys called me out yesterday, and I'm so grateful because I got off that call and was like, okay.

Like, I needed all of that.

So proud of you.

Good, the bad, the ugly.

I'm so proud of you.

We were in a mastermind call yesterday, and I could feel it and as I'm watching it, I'm like, okay.

I could see the process and that's exactly what was happening.

That's a very beautiful room.

I'll tell you right now.

Like the people that are in it, in that Mastermind is.

It's beautiful.

But they pour in, they call out because they care and they want to see you rise.

Yeah, it's like, I don't know if this feels like a really good crew that we have.

Very much so.

Very, very much so.

I mean, yeah, it's just, it's really special.

So I love that you had that moment of like, okay, you're still a fire sign.

And there was a point where I was like, she's going to lose her shit.

She's kind of.

I, no, I'm just, I'm really.

See, I haven't been in a Mastermind or coaching in a long time.

And I know myself.

I stay silent.

I don't share everything.

And I shared everything.

Like even getting on the call when everyone was like, oh, I'm so energized to be here.

I was like, I'm tired.

I gotta tell you the truth because I'm not gonna waste time being fake here.

I got, I need to keep it real.

So I'm becoming a little bit more like you in that sense now.

Like blunt and unapologetically honest.

Everything in my life, like it's.

And like I'm losing people and that's fine.

This has been a time coming for you.

And how does it feel?

Oh yeah, like it's been a time coming for you.

It's in you 100%.

Like I wouldn't even be, we wouldn't

be working together if it wasn't in you.

It's in you that, that fire, that, that voice, the message, the, you know, boundaries in place, speaking for what you want.

I can see it coming up.

I can.

It's bubbling and I love it.

Yeah, I think.

Cause I hid for so long and I still continue to hide.

But I'm just, I'm middle aged now.

I don't have time for any bs.

Like it is.

I call it like I see it all the time.

And I tell you there's something about age.

Like, honestly I can't remember who said it, it was just recently.

They're like, when you're in your 40s, you care less about what other people think.

You hit this point where it's like, actually why I used to care about that.

And Those in your 50s, you're like, I don't give a Shit about what people think.

Like, I just.

I just don't care anymore.

It's so interesting how it is.

Talking to somebody yesterday and they were going through it and they're like, well, you know, this person is saying this and sharing this and putting this out in content.

Doesn't that upset you?

I'm like, who fuck cares?

Put your head down.

Just don't.

I.

Who cares?

Literally, I be like, put the blinders on and speak.

Because everything.

And I mean, I say this for myself.

I can fall into those pieces of comparison, too.

Much less than what I used to look.

And I do think that's part age, but way less than what I used to.

But it's like, I look at that and go, that's energy.

I don't.

That's not where I want to put it right now.

Don't want to put it there.

Totally.

Yeah.

There's, like, a tangent.

Yeah.

It's just like wasting time if you are caring what other people are.

Unless it's like, you know, I look at your stuff and I'm like, oh, yeah, like, this is good.

Like, I should do something like that.

And then I don't.

But I'm not, like, upset because someone posted something that I disagree with or whatever.

It's like, I don't even care.

Like, no, I actually, like, scroll way less, like, because I can't even be on.

It's such a negative space now.

But, yeah, you're right.

When you look back, like, in your 30s.

Like, I look back in my 30s and I'm like, who was this person?

I'm really.

Yeah, I feel good with who I am now more than ever, I think.

I think ever in my whole life.

And I think this is interesting because, to be honest, I look at it

in, you know, if we're gonna build

this empire, like, we are doing it

the way we want, and we are

prioritizing, like, health and relationships and nervous

system and mental health.

And we are like.

And I mean, this is something that the outside world doesn't see from you

and I very often.

But we have anchored a lot in,

like, let it be easy.

I mean, we solve our headaches and,

like, we have our moments.

We have some stuff that.

That we're still working through that can be challenging in the back end.

But we are like, this is being built on a way that we are prioritizing ourselves.

We are building, like, more and more

for ourselves and our families and being able to help more people.

And, like, we anchor in that.

It can get to be easy.

So I Do feel different now that even when I fall back into old ways, I'm like, all right, that's.

This is the way we're going.

Like, this is the way we're building it.

Yeah, right.

And it can look differently.

You know, I don't know of.

Or see a leader like yourself or a publishing house that is designed and moving along like yours is.

Oh, I love that you said that.

What do you mean by that?

What's landing for you when you say that?

There's no fake.

There's no fakery.

There's no pretending.

There are a lot of women in particular, because that's majority of who I follow and who is kind of doing what we're doing that put on a show, and we've experienced the show.

Oh, yeah, we have the shows.

Plural.

Yeah.

And I think.

I mean, even just having this recording, like, we're sharing the back end of things, and we never see that with other people or, like, with other companies like this.

So to me, it just.

It feels like we're keeping it real.

I'll say that again.

Like, we always keep it real with.

Even with our authors when we, you know, have to have tough conversations.

Like, we just got to have them, because we're gonna have them.

Yep.

Yep.

We are.

We're not gonna send someone else in to have them.

No, no, no.

No blame on someone else.

No.

And there are times where it's like, oh, that is not how that was supposed to go down.

Okay, so what solution can we find?

And I'll tell you when we figure out that solution, because we always do.

We literally stop and go.

We are resourceful.

We are resourceful.

We figure shit out.

We will get things done.

We.

We hold up to what our.

Our promise is and guide people through that process.

So I'm so glad that you went there, because I feel like that's a piece that we don't talk a lot about.

But, you know, it came from this idea that here we are reinventing ourselves in 40s, in 50s, in ways that I didn't see coming at all.

But we're completely built for.

I'm sorry, we are.

We are built for this.

You and I were pretty scrappy, and we've always been scrappy.

Yeah, but we have been.

We've been solo.

Yep.

A hundred percent.

You talk a lot about your childhood and how you just, you know.

And I'm the same, like, yeah, we just did it.

Yeah.

And that's the piece of it.

So I feel like, you know, we are real to the core, and it's very important to us that we will always stand in integrity.

And we want the author to be able to shine in their story in the most beautiful way possible.

Yeah, yeah.

We're not gonna just throw out some fluff.

This is like the ripple of it.

I just think it's awesome because we get to build what we want.

And I love this ripple of it.

I do so much proud of us.

I'm proud of us too.

And I really wanna anchor back that it was the most challenging experience that we almost wanted to quit on, which was the catalyst to do what we do today.

Sorry, I have to say it like the thing that we hated.

We were so beat on, frustrated, and in that moment went like, we will never treat anyone this way.

This is not gonna ever happen.

And so some of those learning curves that really sting, they're hard, you're learning from and they stuck in the moment.

They are the catalyst.

They sometimes are teaching you that maybe you're seeing it this way because you're meant to do it completely differently.

Yeah.

And it goes back to like a rock bottom moment or something.

Right.

When you experience those very, very low moments, it pushes you to do things different, to change things.

Like it really is the catalyst of change.

And I'm really glad we went through the trenches together.

Through the muddy trenches.

You know, I.

You said rock bottom.

And I love this.

I have a client who's in my outspoken male who I just, I love.

I, I said last year I wanted to have a male in our, in the program.

And I'm so grateful that he is.

And he made the comment he has a lot of years in addiction and sobriety and he works in with helping people on the path of like sponsoring and recovery.

And he said something.

And I think this message goes for everything.

You know, we often think about those rock bottom moments.

And that's where the turn happened.

And he goes, it's not the rock bottom moment.

It's that you believe that you deserve more than what you have.

You have to believe that you're worth, you're worth more.

You deserve more than where you are right there.

And that is to.

I can't tell you for personal reasons too how many times that message lands for me.

And so I think back to that moment where, you know, yes, that was a very big grief, hard time in our lives, personally, globally, and wasn't even publishing a book at the time and not getting any support.

And it was probably the hardest way possible yet we had to walk through that and then believe that we could do it differently that we could actually create something completely differently and look at that experience and be grateful for what it taught us.

Yep.

Again.

Again.

Again.

So if you have a book on your heart, you want to learn how to write your damn book, you want to learn how to even put it together, what it looks like, what the process looks like, you want to.

What the heck is typesetting, you want to understand the editing and getting it out into the world.

Like the, in my opinion, the write your damn book is one of the lowest, like ways of getting entry into learning all the steps.

We did that on purpose.

It's the best way to start, honestly.

Yeah.

The amount of content in there already,

the amount of knowledge that you will walk away with and to prepare you for the process.

Because it's a long road, right?

Like eight, nine months working with a publisher.

It's a long road.

It is.

And it's, it's a lot of tough.

It's like a pregnancy.

It really is.

That's why people are like, oh, I birthed.

Yes, love that you said that.

It is.

It's a long road and it's like birthing that process.

So, you know, if it calls to you, honestly, reach out to us.

It'll be in the show notes.

We are doing a write your damn book retreat in the beginning of June at the beautiful home in Port Ryersey with Jeannie Piercey.

It's Port Paradise.

I'll make sure I tag them here.

And it is a three and a half day, four day, three and a half day retreat of writing retreat that is like very intimate.

I think it's six people.

I think it's very, it's, it's, it's very intimate.

So I'll make sure that's in the show notes too.

If you want to be able to, you know, kind of immerse yourself in a space for writing and get our eyes on the work that you're doing.

Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of Own youn Choices, Own youn Life.

If you love this episode, I invite you to tag me on social media with your takeaways or share it with a friend, please.

If you Feel called, take 30 seconds to to leave a five star review and I will be forever grateful.

Until next time.

Remember, when you own your choices, you truly own your life.