Does it feel like you're constantly running a race, you know,

trying to keep up with what everyone else has, and it's just draining your

energy, it's draining your joy, and frankly, it's draining your bank account.

What if you could step off that treadmill and find true freedom

from that comparison trap?

Well, stick with me today because your breakthrough starts here on today's show.

Hey there.

Welcome back to your Daily, financially Confident Christian.

I'm Ralph, and it's always great to be with you again.

We continue to answer that deep seated question.

How can I become a financially confident Christian?

And we're in week two of our series, beyond the Budget, finding Financial

Freedom through Intentional Living, and we've tackled contentment.

We've talked about gratitude.

We've talked about spending by values, trusting God.

And a little bit about impulse control, and today we're gonna talk

about how to escape the keeping up with the Jones' comparison trap.

Listen, I dunno about you, but I wanna meet them because

they've got a ton of great stuff.

Just think about it for a second.

You scroll or chatter, you walk through a neighborhood and all of a sudden you

see it, that new car or maybe those vacation pictures, or your friend

sends you that pictures of their remodeling and all of a sudden you

start to think, man, I wish I had that.

Your own life feels lacking and you start upgrading, Not because you need it.

'cause of that comparison.

You're trying to keep up with the Joneses, that's what you're doing,

and in the end, what does it do?

It drains your energy because you spend all your time trying to keep up

with something you can't keep up with.

It causes you to go into debt.

I've seen so many people do that, and the most sinister part of the whole thing.

And I want you to hear this, it breeds anxiety because in the end,

you're chasing this moving goalpost.

It just keeps going farther and farther out.

It's like a football field that just doesn't stop, and you never get to

that point of feeling secure and that, that, that comparison, it just

kills your joy and it just completely halts your financial progress.

Here's the thing.

You gotta understand, our culture feeds off of this comparison, especially online.

I, I call it the, the, the, the highlight reel of Facebook and Instagram,

and you name TikTok, all of them.

It's all about comparison.

Look what I have, look what I have.

You need to have this too, but I want you to take a second and just talk

about what scripture warns us about.

Look at the Book of Exodus now, often get to the book of Exodus, but Exodus

chapter 20, verse 17 says this.

You shall not covet and covets all about comparison.

Look at the book of Philippians chapter four, verses 11 to 13.

I have learned to be content.

Whatever the circumstance is, I can do all things through him who gives me strength.

Well, let's just sit here for a second and think about this.

What is the scripture saying?

I have learned to be content, whatever the circumstances, and I can do all things.

Not some things, all things for him who gives me strengths.

And see, here's the thing I want you to really understand.

We make a very bold statement.

Comparison is covetousness in disguise.

That's what it is.

Thou shalt not covet.

One of the, one of the main sins of the Bible, well comparison is just that.

And on the other side of that coin, contentment.

let me just tell you right now, that spiritual strength, because here's

the thing, you've got to recognize.

If you take nothing else away from today's show, God has a unique path

for you, not your neighbor's path, not your friend onlines path, not your

girlfriend from work, whoever that is, God has a unique path just for you.

you weren't ever called to, take someone else's journey.

That's their journey.

Your journey's a different path.

God has a different plan for you.

So now you're asking what can we do?

How do we step off that comparison treadmill, Ralph, it's so hard to not

compare myself to what I have and what the other people don't have or what I don't

have, and they have you ready for it.

It's a little bit bold, but I think you gotta practice what I'll call

radical contentment and guard your heart from those comparison triggers.

You're like, oh, oh, that's a lot of word, Ralph.

What does that mean?

It means to celebrate others.

Celebrate when they have success, and then focus on your own unique purpose.

So I'm gonna give you an action step today to really help you get

past this comparison to the Joneses.

And it all starts with looking at the, we talked about a

lot about triggers yesterday.

I'm gonna talk about some more today.

You gotta learn to limit those comparison triggers.

So I'm gonna encourage you right now to identify one

place that triggers comparison.

Maybe for you, it's at social media.

We talked about that.

I'm scrolling through Facebook and, oh, look at the new car this one has,

and look at the vacation they're on.

Or look at that fancy new watch or whatever that is.

So maybe for you it's social media, sometimes it's a store.

You're in the store and I say, oh, I, I gotta have this.

Or maybe it's just a person you're around.

And you're like, okay, gr, that sounds good, but how do you do it?

Well, unfollow, mute, avoider.

Even if you have to do it for just a week.

Lemme give you some examples.

So let's say that your triggers Instagram stories, you'd love to watch

Instagram 'cause you like to see what influencer are doing, showing those

luxury vacations and it starts to make you feel, I, I wish I could do that.

I, I wish I had that option.

I wish I had the money to do that.

That's a trigger for you.

How do you battle that trigger?

Unfollow them or mute those accounts for seven days.

Maybe you mute 'em forever 'cause you don't need to hear what they have to say.

And then just take a look a couple days after that and say, how's my mood now?

Because I think you're gonna find your mood's gonna change.

How about this?

Maybe you're walking through high-end stores at the mall and as you do

that, I just don't measure up.

Of people feel that I, I've been at the mall before.

I'm like, I'm walking through.

Look, for me, it's always been a weight thing.

Always been a little bit too big to wear the clothes that you find at the

mall, and that was this comparison.

I, I wish I could wear that.

Obviously that's a trigger for me.

So don't go to the mall.

Avoid that shopping area, even if you do it just for a week.

And if you're, well, that's a way to get exercise.

Go for a piece of walking in the outdoors or visit a library.

Avoid that trigger.

How about this trigger?

Maybe you've got that coworker who constantly talks about their

latest purchases, man, every day around the water cooler.

They're just talking about, I did this, Ralph and I did that, and I, yes.

Great.

Well, one of the ways you can avoid that is cut that small talk out together.

Maybe just do it for a week or, or redirect those conversations to topics

that don't stir that comparison.

You're like, okay, Ralph, I can avoid the triggers.

But then you mentioned something a few minutes ago about that envy thing.

'cause honestly, I think that's the bigger part of this, and that is what

do I do when I'm tempted with envy?

I'm gonna give you a couple examples of this.

I mean, basically I want you to just say, you know, thank God for blessing

them, help them help me rejoice them.

But lemme give you some examples.

So let's say you have a friend and a friend post about buying a new car.

Hey, they got the fancy, you were like, oh wow, I wish I could have that car.

But a friend post about that, he bought a new car.

Here's what I want you to say to yourself.

thank God for blessing them.

You gave them an opportunity and then help them to celebrate that.

Hey, that's so cool.

That's a cool car.

I'd love to go for a ride in it sometime.

Or maybe you've got this family member who shares about getting a

raise or a promotion and working.

Man, I'd love to get a raise.

I haven't had a raise in forever.

Promotions.

They don't even do those here.

And maybe at that point you say, God, listen, I trust your timing for me.

I know it's not my time yet, but Lord, I sure.

Thank you for their breakthrough.

See, I'm, I'm flipping a script on that envy, or maybe this

one, and I felt this one myself.

Someone shares their weight loss transformation or maybe

they remodeled their home.

You're like, man, I wish I could lose weight like that.

I wish I could be that skinnier.

I could be that, that, that it ain't shape and you know, I

wanna compare myself to them.

No, but don't do that.

Just say, Lord, thank you for working in their life, and Lord, just teach

me to be joyfully present in my own.

So find ways to break that envy and then do this.

And this is absolutely critical.

Focus on your unique path.

How do you do that?

Here's what you do.

Write two or three blessings unique to you.

You know, maybe you have a strong, supportive spouse.

Well, you don't know what that other person's going through yet.

Maybe they got the brand new car, but their spouse or

relationship is a nightmare.

Or maybe you have the ability to work from home.

You don't even have to deal with the water.

Cool.

And you see everybody else leaving the neighborhood in the morning where you're

like, cool, I can work in my pajamas.

I don't have to go anywhere.

Or maybe you've got a garden.

And that garden just brings you peace.

And then as you reflect, say, Lord, just thank you for this simple, rich life.

I don't wanna trade it for anything.

See, that's how you break that comparison.

You start looking at your blessings.

Maybe look at your skills.

Maybe you're listening to this right now.

You're saying, Ralph, you know what I've done the things you talked about,

man, I am doing great financially.

Well, there's a blessing.

The Lord has blessed you.

He's given you a second chance after a financial hardship, and maybe you

have the skills to help other people.

Or maybe your children make you laugh every day and just

think about it like this.

God, I see how you've been faithful to me, and Lord, help

me to stay focused on the road.

You've marked for me my path.

And now you're probably saying, Ralph, how does this help?

Well, here's what it does.

Obviously it disarms that envy.

That envy is what causes you to stay stuck in that cycle of comparison.

It truly reframes your, it reframes your blessings.

And when you do those things, it brings you peace and it

brings you focus on your path.

Well, let's pray together.

Father God, we just thank you for designing us all uniquely

with our own paths and our own things that make us who we are.

And Lord, we confess to you right now that we fall into that comparison cycle.

We just do, Lord, it's who we are.

Help us to break free of that, free us from that envy Lord, and free us from that

false identity that lies to us and tells us that we need to be something we're not.

And help us find contentment and help us to find clarity, Lord, not in stuff.

Not in the stuff at the mall, not at the stuff online, but in you, Lord.

And help us to celebrate others and honor our path that we're on, and we

ask this in confidence in Jesus' name.

Amen.

Listen, freedom comes when you stop keeping up with others.

That's when you will truly find freedom and live fully in God's

unique design for your life.

So filter that comparison, affirm others, and focus on your purpose.

I'm gonna ask you to do me a favor right now.

If this show, or if this episode has impacted your life, I want

you to share it with somebody.

Just send them a text, send them an email and say, Hey, check this out.

Go to financially confident christian.com.

Tell 'em about what this show has meant to you.

And while you're there, if you wanna get a copy of my book, I'm gonna

give it to you absolutely free.

It's called Mastering Your Finances.

You get to that by going to financially confident christian.com/master.

It's a short book, but let me just tell you right now, it is hugely impactful.

Now, tomorrow we're gonna change this subject a little bit and we're

gonna talk about this question.

How do I define what enough really is?

I don't want you to miss that show because we're really gonna talk about

how do I define what enough really is?

Now let's all go out there and be financially confident.

Christians, you can do this.

I believe in you.

I, I believe in you a hundred percent.

Believe in yourself.

Stay financially savvy.

God bless you, and you have a great day today.