That's one of the reasons why it's important to prioritize your life,
Speaker:because it increases the certainty, it increases the security, if you will,
Speaker:or thrival instead of survival. When you're in survival,
Speaker:that's when you're insecure,
Speaker:In all probability,
Speaker:there's been times in your life where you felt you were in possibly social
Speaker:settings, where you felt a little insecure,
Speaker:a little uncertain about stepping forward and taking actions and leading
Speaker:the pack or leading the way in your life.
Speaker:And other times you may have felt in command and took the direction and
Speaker:took the, you know, the bull by the horns, if you will,
Speaker:and had more certainty and security in your positioning.
Speaker:The question that you want to ask is why do we have moments of insecurity and
Speaker:why do we have moments of security?
Speaker:And I'd like to address that in this particular little presentation.
Speaker:Every human being has a set of priorities, a set of values in their life,
Speaker:and whatever is highest on the list of priorities or values or things that are
Speaker:most important to them, is where they tend to gather the most information.
Speaker:Your brain is set up as an integrative source of information.
Speaker:It takes information from the senses and puts it up and integrates it.
Speaker:And in the area of the highest values,
Speaker:we gather the most information therefore we got the most data to work with to be
Speaker:able to perceive, decide, and act. And therefore we have the most certainty,
Speaker:the most security, if you will. And in the area that's lower on our values,
Speaker:because we tend to procrastinate, hesitate, and frustrate,
Speaker:we don't tend to focus, we don't filter information towards that,
Speaker:we tend to have attention deficit disorder,
Speaker:we tend to not have the plethora of information to be able to
Speaker:feel confident to perceive, decide and act.
Speaker:So what's interesting is that anytime you are setting a goal or an objective
Speaker:in a direction that's not highest on your values,
Speaker:you increase the probability of uncertainty and insecurity,
Speaker:And anytime you're doing it in your highest value, your core confidence,
Speaker:your core confidence is an expression of what you value most.
Speaker:And what's interesting is everybody here has a different set of values,
Speaker:a unique set of values,
Speaker:and some of you are dedicated to business and want to grow a business,
Speaker:some of you are dedicated to intellectual pursuits,
Speaker:some are dedicated to spiritual quests, some to physical fitness and beauty,
Speaker:some into maybe social causes, some into beautiful families,
Speaker:some into wealth building, or combinations thereof. But whatever it is,
Speaker:that's highest on your values,
Speaker:is where you're going to have your core competence.
Speaker:That's where you're going to excel the most.
Speaker:That's where you're going to have the most data to be able to make decisions
Speaker:quickly and lead.
Speaker:That's why whatever's highest on our value is where we lead and we have the most
Speaker:certainty and we have more of an executive function and self-governance in that
Speaker:area. If I walk up to somebody and I ask them,
Speaker:you know, do you believe that you're more one side, more positive than negative,
Speaker:more kind than cruel, more nice than mean,
Speaker:they have an uncertainty about that answer and they go, not exactly.
Speaker:If I say you're more mean than nice, more cruel than kind,
Speaker:more negative than positive, they go I don't think so either.
Speaker:But if I say sometimes you're nice, sometimes you're
Speaker:Yep.
Speaker:Because in the forebrain and the area of the executive center in the brain,
Speaker:when we're living by our highest values,
Speaker:we're more objective and objectivity means neutral, more balanced.
Speaker:But if we're living in our amygdala,
Speaker:which as a result of living by lower priorities, lower values,
Speaker:we tend to go into amygdala and we tend to polarize our information and
Speaker:subjectively bias information and there's no way we can have certainty and
Speaker:security when we're sitting in there in this survival mode.
Speaker:Anytime we're living in our lower values, we go into survival mode.
Speaker:Anytime we live by the highest value and living congruently and by priority,
Speaker:we go into thrival mode.
Speaker:And that's where we have the most certainty and security
Speaker:Maslow beautifully described it, as you got kind of a suicidal survival level,
Speaker:then you got security and then a socialization,
Speaker:self-esteem and then you eventually have self-actualization. Well,
Speaker:that's a correlation with values. You live by your highest values,
Speaker:you're moving in self-actualization pathway.
Speaker:Self-Actualized individuals that have self-governance.
Speaker:And people that are sitting there in insecurity,
Speaker:they're going to be living in lower values.
Speaker:So anytime you are trying to do something that's out of your core competence,
Speaker:out of what you value most, out of what you excel at,
Speaker:it's normal to have insecurity. If I was going to speak at an IT convention,
Speaker:I'd have insecurity.
Speaker:I'd have anxiety probably about to speak to cuz that's not my area of expertise.
Speaker:I delegate that.
Speaker:It's wise to delegate all lower priority things and get on to doing the higher
Speaker:priority things in life to master your life.
Speaker:You can't do everything so you're going to have to delegate things that aren't
Speaker:inspiring to if you want an inspiring life.
Speaker:And so that's one of the reasons why it's important to prioritize your life,
Speaker:because it increases the certainty, It increases the security if you will,
Speaker:or thrival instead of survival. When you're in survival,
Speaker:that's when you're insecure. Because when you don't have food and, you know,
Speaker:if you don't have oxygen, you don't have water, you don't have food,
Speaker:you don't have protective house,
Speaker:you don't have reproduction and clothing and things, you're in survival mode,
Speaker:barely surviving. And so the next one is now that you got that,
Speaker:now you wanna secure that and stabilize that. So these are all basic you know,
Speaker:basic survival strategies,
Speaker:but the second you're living by priority and you're doing something of service
Speaker:and your income is going up and you're feeling like you're ahead of the game,
Speaker:your insecurities automatically drop out,
Speaker:because you now focused on what's really important and being of service and
Speaker:being compensated and you can pay your bills and things of this nature.
Speaker:So anytime you're in a changing environment that's
Speaker:to and it's not what's highest on your priorities,
Speaker:it's normal to feel an insecurity. I don't know if anybody doesn't have it.
Speaker:I have those periodically when I have changes that I'm adapting to.
Speaker:So insecurity is not a bad thing, but it is a feedback.
Speaker:It's a feedback to let you know that you're probably
Speaker:really most important, not really highest in priority.
Speaker:And this is a common thing that occurs when you you're walking around in the
Speaker:world out there and you meet somebody you thinks got more intelligence than you,
Speaker:or more success than you, or more, you know, wealth than you,
Speaker:or more stable relationships than you, or more social connections than you,
Speaker:or more physically fit than you, or more spiritually aware than you,
Speaker:the moment you compare yourself to them and think, oh my God,
Speaker:they have something I don't, you feel a little insecure and you,
Speaker:you're too humble to admit what you see in them inside yourself and you're
Speaker:playing small and exaggerating them,
Speaker:you're automatically going to be feeding yourself and injecting their values
Speaker:into your life and trying to be doing something that's not really important to
Speaker:you, you just think it is,
Speaker:and you're living in their shadows instead of standing on shoulders and giving
Speaker:yourself permission to shine according to your own highest values.
Speaker:If you look carefully, whatever you see in them, you have,
Speaker:it's just in a different form according to what you value,
Speaker:you have the same intelligence.
Speaker:I have the same intelligence as an IT specialist, but in human behavior.
Speaker:And you have the same intelligence on whatever's most important to you.
Speaker:It may be raising a family or maybe going and working in the gardens or
Speaker:something, or maybe you know what goes on on television or in a sport.
Speaker:But you're not lacking whatever you perceive in others,
Speaker:you just have it in your area of expertise, which is your highest value.
Speaker:That's why on my website,
Speaker:I tell people to go and do the Value Determination process, because if you do,
Speaker:it'll help you identify where your highest values are and it'll help you
Speaker:structure your life according and delegate lower priority things and excel,
Speaker:and then your insecurities drop.
Speaker:That's also one of the reasons why I do the Breakthrough Experience program,
Speaker:pretty well, I've done it 1,133 times around the world,
Speaker:getting ready to do it again. And that program,
Speaker:I do what I can to show people how to dissolve the comparisons you have to other
Speaker:people and dissolve the emotions that arise when you're not living by your
Speaker:highest priority, and you've now got yourself trapped in an insecure mode,
Speaker:uncertainties.
Speaker:I show you how to dissolve that emotional baggage that's distracting you,
Speaker:get back onto priority and reclaim your power again.
Speaker:And it's a very powerful exercise in doing that and it's a simple educational
Speaker:process that I give in the Breakthrough Experience to help you do that.
Speaker:Because if you live by priority and fill your day with the highest priority
Speaker:actions that inspire you,
Speaker:where you have core competence and you know that you know that you know,
Speaker:and you start with what you know, and just keep letting what you know grow,
Speaker:your security level is transcended.
Speaker:Your insecurities are transcended and your security level is off the roof.
Speaker:You're basically empowered again. You know,
Speaker:I have very good strength and knowledge in the area of human behavior.
Speaker:But again, put me in IT, that's not my area. I delegate that so,
Speaker:I I would feel insecure there.
Speaker:Put me in there and all of a sudden taking care of a grandbaby,
Speaker:I have a new grandbaby. <Laugh> it's two months and a week old.
Speaker:And I'm like going, I'm not sure exactly what to do every minute with the baby,
Speaker:you know, <laugh>, That would be a new thing for me again,
Speaker:it's been 30 something years since I've had children.
Speaker:So in the process of doing it, I would feel less secure in that situation.
Speaker:Or if I had to go repair a car, the car broke down, I'd repair,
Speaker:I'd feel insecure,
Speaker:cuz those aren't things that I normally do or not high on my values and not
Speaker:priorities.
Speaker:So fill your day with the highest priority actions that inspire you most,
Speaker:where you excel, where you know that you know that you know,
Speaker:you know something and build upon that and gain momentum,
Speaker:incremental momentum and more knowledge about that
Speaker:and you'll grow your security level and won't feel so much insecure.
Speaker:And beware of comparing yourself to other people and trying to be somebody
Speaker:you're not.
Speaker:The magnificence of who you are is far greater than any fantasies you'll make of
Speaker:yourself trying to fit in. Einstein said,
Speaker:if you're a cat trying to swim like a fish,
Speaker:you're going to beat yourself up and feel insecure, in water.
Speaker:But if you're a cat climbing a tree, you feel fine. So realize who you are,
Speaker:realize what your highest values are. Do the Value Determination process,
Speaker:come and learn at the Breakthrough Experience how to dissolve the emotional
Speaker:baggage that's revolving around this insecurity and reintegrate your life onto
Speaker:priority.
Speaker:And give yourself permission to delegate the lower priority things and not trap
Speaker:yourself in time by doing things that aren't really, truly meaningful,
Speaker:inspiring and where you excel.
Speaker:And do something that you do excel at that serves people
Speaker:so you're remunerated enough to pay for all that,
Speaker:and get rewarded in life and then get paid So you have financial security in
Speaker:addition to regular security. And if you do,
Speaker:then you're not going to be sitting there living in an insecure world so much.
Speaker:And it is an option.
Speaker:I really believe that the insecurities we have in life are just feedback
Speaker:mechanisms to guide us back to what's really authentic.
Speaker:I really think that everything that's going on in our life is actually trying to
Speaker:get us authentic. And the authentic us revolves around our highest value,
Speaker:our identity and our most knowledge and our purpose in life revolves around
Speaker:what we value most. So finding it out what it is, go on the website,
Speaker:do the Demartini Value Determination process and take advantage of being really
Speaker:clear about what's really important,
Speaker:prioritize your daily life in that direction,
Speaker:delegate the lower priority things and watch how your insecurities now become
Speaker:inspired certainties. And those are the people who lead.
Speaker:You can either follow the crowd and follow the, be a follower of a culture,
Speaker:or you can lead one.
Speaker:And I'd much rather be on the living by design than living by duty,
Speaker:living by an inspiration, not a desperation.
Speaker:So walk the path of more certainty and security by prioritizing your life
Speaker:and filling your day with things that you know, with certainty,
Speaker:you know something about and stick to that. And by the way,
Speaker:you don't have to say anything except what you know,
Speaker:so you don't have to speak up.
Speaker:You can just smile <laugh> and just be present and learn.
Speaker:If you learn and listen,
Speaker:you might learn more and you'll have more confidence as you go along.
Speaker:But stick to priority. Watch what happens. And if you do you'll,
Speaker:you'll say thank you to your own life and know that everything is a feedback to