Welcome to the Faith Based Business podcast with your host, Pastor Bob Thibodeau.

On this podcast, we interview fellow entrepreneurs who are willing to share their stories, their trials and their triumphs in business, all in an effort to help you avoid the same obstacles and to achieve success faster.

But at all times, continue to rely on our faith to see us through to victory.

Now with today's guest, here is your host, Pastor Bob Thibodeau.

Hello everyone everywhere.

Pastor Robert Thibodeau here.

Welcome to the Faith Based Business podcast.

We are so blessed that you are joining us today.

Got a question for you.

What if the obstacles you face today are not really barriers but weeds in the garden of your soul blocking out the true identity and purpose, Your true identity and purpose.

Purpose from flourishing.

Have you ever wondered what's really holding you back from cultivating your full potential and thriving in your God given purpose in life?

Well, today's guest will help you uncover that answer.

Kristin Van Tilburg, host of your Kingdom Garden podcast.

She is a transformational author, coach, expert in spiritual healing.

I mean, with her unique blend of storytelling and coaching and social work, Kristen equips individuals to overcome these obstacles, heal from their trauma, embrace their divine identity.

Folks, get ready to learn how to weed out the saboteurs in your soul's garden.

Help me welcome to the program my longtime friend, Kristin Van Tilburg.

Kristen, it is a blessing to have you back on the program again.

I can't believe I'm here.

My heart is so full of joy, I just can't express it.

It's just incredible to be with you and your audience today.

Amen.

Amen.

Now for those who may not have heard our prior interviews because it's been a couple of years, can you tell us in your own words, who is Kristen Van Tilberg?

Well, you know, the ultimate identity that I try to live in these days is I am a child of God.

I'm trying to get away from all, you know, the things you said about me, they're all true.

There's nothing exaggerated there.

But the thing that I have in common with everybody listening right now is I am a child of God and I have a God given purpose and every one of them does too.

And so what I feel like God is asking me to do is be, be that intermediary step that's just temporary to help you to hear that still small voice of the Holy Spirit within and be reconnected to that, to that guiding force.

Because people need more God.

That's, that's what a headline on my website right now is God said to me, kristen, people don't need more social media.

They don't need more stuff, they don't need more shop, they don't need more Netflix.

They need more God.

Amen.

Trying to get.

Figure out how to get that message to people in a way that's empowering and encouraging and inspiring.

The creative force of this universe wants you.

He wants to be your life.

He wants to be in your heart.

He wants to fill up and transform and renew your mind kind.

So what.

What's in the way?

And what.

How can we sweep that all out, out of the way and open up that super highway of connection to God?

Amen.

Amen.

Now your podcast is titled your kingdom garden.

Can you explain what the garden of our soul represents and how it relates to our identity and purpose?

Yeah, I would love to, because I was confused about that.

I mean, the.

That this is called that because God told me to call it that, because if you've been in marketing, it makes no sense.

It.

A podcast about gardening is going to attract people who want to grow tomatoes.

Right?

And that's what I said to God.

This is not the right name for this podcast, but he was insistent, grow your kingdom garden.

So, I mean, that idea came about two years ago, and the reason that it's hard for me, been hard for me to crank it up, is I did not know how to talk about it in a way that people, People would see what God was trying to offer them.

But now I do.

Now I do.

The, the purpose, you know, it says in Jeremiah, I knew you before you were born.

So God, this is, this is my way of expressing that God created a garden for your life.

And, and the way that you live your life is reflected in the state of your garden.

So if there's a lot of weeds in your garden, if it's overgrown, if it's, you know, no care taken of it, you know, that, that connection, that Holy Spirit connection that's supposed to be guiding and supposed to be driving and supposed to be opening up for you, the place where miracles happen.

You know, that, that, that highway is.

It's not.

It's not working properly.

So the seeds of the garden are twofold.

There's the seeds of identity and the seeds of purpose.

And God wants to answer those questions for you.

If you're not clear, he wants to answer those questions and he wants you to embrace his answers.

Because what's going to tell you about your identity?

You're not good enough.

You're bad, you're.

You're lost.

You're weak.

You can't do it.

God doesn't believe any bad about you.

But he knows that he needs.

He needs.

You need his partnership to.

To feel the worthiness.

You're worthy because you're his child.

The prodigal son tells us that that boy went out and wasted everything.

And God welcomed him back with a robe and a ring and shoes and a seat at the table.

Amen.

Lost.

No problem.

God's got the answer.

Come home.

I'm here.

You'll be welcomed in.

You'll be treated like the child of me that you are.

So, seeds of identity and then seeds of purpose.

What?

Now that you know that who you are, what are you going to do with that life?

I have a plan for you, my child.

And it's a beautiful plan.

And it's not going to be a thing where I'm going to send you off to somewhere where you're unhappy.

Why would I do a thing like that?

My desire for my children is to be joyful, to be happy, to be abundant, to be prosperous.

And I want the kingdom of heaven to be created on earth.

But gosh, boys and girls, it's your job.

If I wanted to create, I created the structure.

But I've asked you to be in charge of this.

Jesus tells us that the kingdom.

Seek ye first the kingdom.

Matthew 6:33.

Seeking first the kingdom.

Because that partnering with God is the key to everything.

So that's what I help people do.

Open that door.

Come on in, God.

Let's partner.

Let's do something.

You also talk about identity saboteurs as weeds in the garden of our soul.

What are, say, three common saboteurs that people face and how can we uproot them out of our garden?

Well, the three categories are fear, doubt, and then perfectionism, that kind of thing.

When we get lost up in stories and this gets created from our circumstances.

And it has a whole lot unfortunately to do with the way that we were interacted with as children, because let's face it, our brain, the neural pathways in our brain get built by the interaction that we have with.

With our primary caregivers.

And that includes teachers and pastors and all of that.

And when those.

And when those poor folks like my.

My dad, God bless him, my dad was really.

He was a pastor, but he misunderstood some very important things about identity.

He said a child is a blank slate for the parent to write on.

And what did he write on my slate?

Your job, Kristin, is to make me happy.

So what did I become?

A people pleaser?

Not not the path to success.

Friends, for you people out there, you know what I mean?

We are meant to be pleasing to God.

We are not meant to live our lives trying to please people.

And when, when you don't know that man, you have no self esteem, you have no self worth, and you're not getting your direction from the Holy Spirit.

You're out there trying to make everything work for everybody else and it's exhausting and they never appreciate it.

It's a big, big mistake.

This people pleasing is a massive saboteur.

And if it's running your life, I can help you.

Because I had to get, I had to kick that to the curb in my own life.

And it is a process.

I'm going to admit that right now.

Because the tendency to want to please people, that does not go away.

Yeah, but you can serve people.

That's completely different from pleasing people.

So you have to.

Your work emphasizes that win, win, win type of thinking through unconditional love.

Can you share an example of how that mindset has transformed someone's life or circumstances?

Yes.

Let me think.

Win, win, win.

So I have a relationship with a beautiful man and there are conflicts.

Our values are not completely aligned.

And so what do you do when a conflict arises?

Well, what I have learned is that when I am, when I step into the highest part of myself that's deeply connected to the love of the father.

And seeing from the perspective of the father, which is not my personal perspective, but the perspective where there's two imperfect individuals trying to create a life together, doing the best they can.

When I see the conflict through that perspective, there are always more options than my personality perspective would ever come up with.

And so when I go to try to resolve a conflict with open heart, open mind, open to new possibilities, open to different perspectives, open to different solutions, things get worked out and they get worked out without anger and without bitterness.

Yeah, that is such a.

That is such a different relationship than one where you have a big fight and then you have makeup and then you go on down the road and nothing's resolved.

Okay, you know, that's good enough.

It can get you a long ways.

But if you want a real intimate, deep connection with your partner, you have to learn how to step out of your personality and into the perspective that God has on the situation.

And again, that's not easy.

And I'm not perfect at it, but I can help people because I've been building these skills for a long time.

Amen.

Amen.

And your coaching and writing, they integrate that type of social work, spiritual healing, and storytelling.

How do these elements just work together to inspire transformation for your clients and your readers?

Well, I try to keep things simple.

Life is just too complicated for most of us these days.

And so my substack newsletter, which I'm very excited about, I told you, I've just.

I've gotten on a roll now, and.

And God gave me sort of a framework, a formula where I can put a short little message into my newsletter and send it out to my subscribers every day, which just talks about it.

I use a quote from somebody that's got fame and authority, and then I tell you about my personal experience with that quote, and then I suggest how you can implement.

Implementation is a big key that's been missing in our lives.

We have so much information, Bob, but what in the world can you do with an encyclopedia of knowledge if you can't apply a little bit of it?

So my little.

My little newsletter, which is intended to be absorbed and read in about five minutes, it then it leaves you with a suggestion.

How can you implement this in your kingdom garden?

Because that's what I want for people, Bob.

The people that are that.

That are really lit up by this idea.

I want to teach them to manage their own kingdom garden, and eventually they'll be on down the road with the Lord and we'll be great friends.

But it's my job to make people dependent on my wisdom.

No, I want you to find your own connection to the Holy Spirit so that his grace and his wisdom.

Amen.

Amen.

You've described helping people achieve their impossible dreams.

I remember that song, the Impossible Dream.

As a matter of fact, that was my first solo performance in front of an actual crowd.

Oh, wow, back in the day.

Right.

But what advice do you have for someone who feels stuck or doubts that their dreams are even achievable?

Well, you know, my heart goes out to people like that because there's been times in my life where that's exactly where I was.

And what I have realized is when you're really feeling stuck is when the path that God set for you is here and you're over here in the weeds someplace.

And it's really.

Actually, when you think about it like that, if you're.

If you're truly wandering off of the path, it's good to get stuck.

You don't want to wander off forever.

You want to find a place where you're like, oh, this is not working.

I can't.

I can't go another step.

The question is, what are you going to focus on in that moment.

Are you going to focus on.

The Holy Spirit is in me.

He will guide me back.

I'm sorry, Lord.

I think I've been doing my own thing.

Forgive me.

I'm interested now.

Show me how to get back to this path that you have.

For me, that's where faith is the very important factor.

Because, you know, it's real easy in this world to get confused.

All.

Everything that we need to be doing is out there and the Lord is in here.

So it's not.

It's not 100% our fault that we get off in the weeds because we're looking out there, trying to do.

And.

And I've been guilty myself of, you know.

Well, I've got to pay the bills and I've got to figure this out and.

Me, me, me.

Well, okay, you know, the Lord doesn't want you to sit on the couch and wait for your life to unfold.

No, he wants you to be actively taking the steps that he sets before you.

So we get off in the weeds when we sort of have Ms.

Just.

You get discombobulated in this world.

I mean, it's confusing, isn't it?

And it's like, oh, why am I over here?

Why am I feeling so stuck?

Well, you know, that's that still small voice.

So again, this prodigal son, there's so much richness in that story.

Just.

Just admit, you know, when that boy came back, he said, father, I.

I'm not fit to be anything more than just one of your servants.

Just.

Just let me have a job.

And what did God say?

Son, Son, I love you.

You're welcome here.

I'm so glad you're back.

Let's get you back on track.

You don't have to be out in the servants hall.

You come and dine at my table.

Friends, every single one of you that's off stuck in the weeds, he is inviting you to a banquet.

Come back.

Amen.

Eat the banquet with your father.

Swallow your pride.

Swallow your guilt.

Let go of that shame.

Jesus has taken care of all of that.

Don't.

Amen.

Confused that your mistakes are a barrier?

No, those have been paid for.

Come back.

Open up.

And if you need help, if you need human help, people like me, that's how.

What we do is we help people find that path again.

Amen.

Amen.

Yeah, I love that, that.

That story too, because I usually preach it and I end up preaching probably once a year.

But it's not just one sermon.

I mean, there is so much inside that Story, you know, and it's usually a month long song because I do every Sunday and it'll be four, sometimes five sermons in a row just to, because I, you know, you know, Pastor Bob, I like diving deep on stuff, you know.

Yes.

And one of my favorite expressions was, you know, the, the father went and hugged them, pigs stink and all.

He didn't say, go take a shower and then I'll hug you.

Right, that's right.

Amen.

But yeah, that's how we are.

God welcomes us, you know, pig stink and all, you know.

Praise God.

Amen.

Now, your books, both fiction and non fiction, aim to empower and transform.

Can you share a story or a theme for one of your books that has deeply resonated with your audience?

I know there's probably a lot of them.

Well, the, the non fiction book that I feel really led to talk about is called Accessing the Fruits of the Spirit.

I think people have misunderstood.

I know that I did.

This was.

That book is written out of a revelation that God's intention for everybody's life is to live in the fruit of the spirit.

Which, you know, not coincidentally is back to this garden idea.

Are you cultivating love, peace, joy, faithfulness, gentleness, self control?

There's a couple more and, and a strange one that's missing is gratitude.

Our gardens need to be cultivated with that kind of quote unquote fertilizer because if you're, if the fabric of your life is built on those fruits, then your life is going to be enjoyable and pleasant and you're going to be able to serve the kingdom because you're not weighed down with the, the weeds of self doubt and, and, and shame and guilt and all that other stuff.

Those are weeds, friends.

No place in your garden Jesus has died so that those weeds can just be pulled out when they show up.

You don't have to live in a garden full of weeds.

So my book, Accessing the Fruits of the Spirit is not a book about knowledge so much.

It's a book about how to take an experience that you've had and grow a fruit out of it.

Amen.

How many books have you written?

Well, there's four on, on Amazon and a bunch that are, that are not good enough yet.

Bob, I fall into that trap.

They're not good enough.

I raise, I raise my hand.

I raised my hand.

I've got, you know, I've got the ones that are on Amazon right now and then I've got like five more that are in some process of being done, you know, so yeah, I'm in that same trap as you.

Yeah, that's.

That's one of the things that I, I told God I was going to do this year.

I was going to publish.

At least one.

One will be done, you know, There you go.

So your books are on Amazon, right?

Yeah.

Accessing the Fruits of the Spirit is a kind of a journaling book.

And then I have Accessing the Fruits of the Spirit coloring book.

And I'm going to talk about that, but I feel like God just popped it into my mind.

Some of us find a lot of joy and growth from doing something like coloring.

Yeah, my wife, she loves coloring stuff.

She's got.

I'm buying her stuff on Amazon all the time for just, that's how she, you know, I read.

I'm a reader, and she just likes, you know, and it's all.

It's not, you know, clowns.

So it's, it's, you know, either flowers or, you know, Christian theme, you know, stuff like that.

That's what she, she enjoys doing.

So.

Yeah, I'll get, I'll be getting there.

That.

Because she's about due for another coloring book.

Valentine's Day is right around the corner.

I think that'll be a great gift.

I'll surprise her.

Well, if.

If someone is listening today and they feel like their garden is being overrun with weeds, how can they get in touch with you and obtain more information about weed in their garden?

Well, YourKingdomGarden.com is up.

There's some links that are broken, and I'm working on that as a contact page.

Kristin@Kristenvantilberg.com is an email address that they can reach me.

And what was the third thing?

Oh, well, they can find my sub stack.

Maybe you could put my substack.

Absolutely.

Show.

Yep.

Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely.

Give it.

Just go ahead and put it out there on audio right now.

What's the sub stack address?

Oh, man, I'm sorry, Bob.

Can't just put it out there.

I think it's something like Christian Vantilberg.substack.stack.com.

Yeah, okay.

Could be that.

Okay, well, we'll figure it out, folks.

It'll be down the show notes, folks.

Kristen has given us powerful insights into reclaiming our identity and cultivating a flourishing soul.

Basically, right now, if you are ready, if you're ready right now to overcome these obstacles and to thrive, first, visit her podcast, your kingdom Garden for more inspiration.

Start weeding out those saboteurs.

Step into your divine purpose right now, today.

Get in touch with her.

Drop down the show notes.

Links will be right there.

Subscribe to her newsletter Praise God.

I mean she is awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome.

On substack.

You need to subscribe to this.

It is.

It'll just bless your soul.

It really will.

Amen.

That's how we say down South.

They just bless your soul.

Amen.

Amen.

Be blessed everybody.

Amen.

Folks, that is all the time we have for today.

Praise the Lord.

Time goes by so fast again.

Drop down the show notes.

Click the links right there.

Get in touch with Kristen today folks.

For Kristen Van Tilberg, myself passed by reminding you to be blessed in all that you do.

You have been listening to the Faith Based Business Podcast with Pastor Bob Thibodeau.

We appreciate you as a listener and fellow believer and want to encourage you in your entrepreneurial efforts.

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Until next time, be blessed in all that you do.

It.