Hello, everybody.

Welcome back to Adult Child of Dysfunction.

Today with we are doing Tammy's Takes number five, where we break down what our guests teach us about trauma, resilience and how we actually come back to ourselves.

Today I'm going to be discussing the episode that we did with Kelly Kinney yesterday.

Absolutely amazing episode.

And an absolutely amazing young woman, if you have not heard the episode, highly suggest you go back and listen to it.

She is all magical and all fairy energy and she talks about all fire and the rituals and.

But she talks about truth.

And she kept saying something that stuck with me really, really, really hard.

And it was a very clear truth.

She said she didn't find herself.

She remembered herself.

And I want you to let that sit for a minute.

She remembered herself, didn't make a new self, didn't find herself.

She remembered herself.

So I want to talk about what that really means because I hear it all the time.

I just need to find myself.

I don't know who I am anymore.

I feel lost.

But here's the truth.

You're not lost.

You know who you are.

You're just disconnected from that person.

And here's how that happens.

Kelly actually talked about it really well.

She shared from a very young age how she didn't have that stable mothering energy.

She had trauma.

She had to figure things out on her own.

So what did she do?

She learned to trust herself.

She learned to trust her instincts.

Not perfectly, not without mistakes, but she kept coming back to what feels right for me.

She questioned everything, but that was the main question.

What feels right for me?

Because so many of us are waiting for the clarity.

We're waiting for someone to tap us on the shoulder and be like, hey, by the way, this is your purpose.

We're waiting for that great big aha moment.

But it doesn't work like that.

You actually have to connect first.

Then comes the clarity.

Not before.

Not before.

Didn't happen for me.

Didn't happen for Kelly.

It didn't happen for any of us.

Kelly did not wake up one day and just say, but, Ching, I'm going to have this, create this beautiful, magical life.

No.

She made small, aligned choices over and over again.

And she talks a lot about those choices.

She watched what she was putting in her body and only fed herself good food.

She watched how she was living.

She left the environments and the people that didn't feel right or that were toxic for her.

And she followed what lit her up.

And even when she went off track, even when she slipped, because that is part of healing My friends, that is part of connecting.

That is part of learning.

Even when those things happen, when she slipped into addiction or she slipped into an unhealthy relationship, she still continued to come back to herself.

And a lot of people miss that.

A lot of people get off track and they think, oh, I'm done.

But no, healing is not a straight line.

It's remembering and forgetting and coming back and leaving and relearning over and over and over again.

Kelly even talked about a time where she had created something absolutely beautiful.

And then she was so overwhelmed that she lost herself again.

She stopped taking care of herself again.

She pushed people away.

She went back to her old patterns.

But instead of staying there, she sat with herself.

And what did she ask herself?

What is true for me now?

And she rebuilt again.

So what does remembering yourself actually look like?

It's not complicated.

We make it complicated.

It really just looks like getting back into your body, learning to breathe, slowly, slowing down, going outside, feeling something real.

She put it so simply when she literally said, just go hug a tree.

And it.

It.

It really.

Oh, my goodness, it made so much sense.

I know people hear that and they laugh, but let me put it in.

Let me translate.

Let me put it in layman's terms for you.

Get out of your head and back into your body, because your body knows who you are before your mind starts overthinking and analyzing everything.

So if you are feeling disconnected right now, you are going to do something, but you're not going to try to fix your whole life.

You're going to start simple.

Start with this.

Take five deep breaths.

Put your feet on the ground.

Get out in nature.

Touch something real.

Tree, grass, air, sunlight.

I don't care what it is.

And while you're doing that, I want you to ask yourself, what actually feels good right now?

Not what should feel good.

Not what someone else told you feels good, but what feels good to you in your soul.

Because the real takeaway is, guys, you don't need to become someone new.

You need to come back to who you already are.

Before the trauma, before the conditioning, before the expectations, before people tried to rewrite your story for you.

Just come back to who you are.

And always, continually and forever ask your question.

That question.

What feels good for me right now?

What do I need right now?

So ask yourself that today.

And if this episode is resonating with you, please, and you're realizing you're sitting there thinking, wow, I've been disconnected from myself for a very long time.

I want you to take this next step with me.

Head on over to my website.

It's just my name, Tammy Vincent.

Dot com.

Listen to my webinar awakening your authentic self, because that's exactly what we're talking about here.

Not becoming someone new, but remembering who you were before the world told you who to be.

We're going to talk about boundaries.

We're going to talk about the myths, about healing.

We're going to talk about all kinds of different things, but we're going to talk about coming back to the real you.

And if you know somebody that could also use this information, please share it with someone.

Please.

Because you're not lost, my friends.

You're really just coming home to yourself.

And I think that's what we need to do.

So I will see you back in the next.

Tammy takes.