Hey there, you don't need that new sale.
What you need to do is heal your relationship with money so that you can
have a better relationship with selling.
You have had dry months with no leads or prospects in your business at the
moment, and you're wreaking desperation when you happen that sales call.
Even trying to refresh your Stripe dashboard or your CRM to see if the
sale came through or if someone has missed looking at your proposal.
You've heard the advice of following up, but you're following up every
single day, every three days, so many times that you're wearing yourself out.
During a sales call, they're saying a verbal yes, but what they really
were doing was playing in your face.
Or so you felt that.
Decentering money will help you release that desperation for the next sale.
Today I'll share how to get off the sales desperation train and get on
the trust train and know that if a new business relationship is going to be
in your favor, it'll work out for you.
Stay tuned.
This is the Harmonious Wealth Podcast, where we're breaking online business
owners free from chasing every next revenue milestone and instead prioritizing
lifestyle and legacy goals so you can finally have the personal wealth
to show for your business success.
I'm your host, Iyanna Vaughn, fractional CFO and bookkeeper here to guide you.
Now let's start building your financial legacy.
Hey there, welcome to another episode of the Harmonious Wealth Podcast.
We are in episode six, and I'm going to talk about how to not act
out of desperation for your sales goals and your monthly money goals.
So you might be thinking or subconsciously thinking that your sales or your
cash on hand is tied to your value.
You may have experienced years of multiple six figures in your business,
or cash on hand wasn't a surplus.
You were able to pay yourself, but then something changed.
I know a lot of business owners saw quite a change in their
financials in 2022 and 2023.
And because of this, they tied it to like their ability, they might have
formed some inadequacies and that continuously creates a act of desperation.
And whenever you are on sales calls, you're feeling personal when someone
says no to you because you're, you're thinking it's like no to you
versus no to the service, right?
And because you're in this spiral or like this wheel of perpetual dry
spells in your business, you're not making the revenue that you need.
You're not driving those sales.
You're not getting those leads.
You might not be having that same profit as well as your cash on hand.
You know that you need it, but because you're subconsciously feeling that
spirit of rejection, you're not showing up in a way that is confident.
And I want to share my personal testimony before I get to like share how we help
our clients work through this dry spell.
2016, I started my company, lovely financials group.
And at the time I was about 25 years old.
And up to that point, I was worn out.
I had my daughter at Just turned 23 and right after college, I became a foster
mom to adults with special needs because my family was in that industry as well.
It was also helpful for me to stay at home with my daughter as I just had her.
I was working like three jobs.
It was like, a good switch on things, right?
Especially if it was going to immediately impact someone's lives in a positive way.
However, while the work was rewarding, I was essentially a mom of three overnight
and I was like, okay, how can I create a way for me to do something for myself?
And that's when I got into like crafting.
I got into like, Blogging and that introduced me to the online space.
This was about 2015 when that happened I was witnessing women in the online
space crushing their goals, creating like financial success for their
families, generational wealth, but the one thing that they were afraid
to talk about was money , that was something that I loved was accounting.
So they were afraid to talk about money, afraid of taxes and during college, I
took accounting courses and I loved them.
So my degrees in healthcare management, and I dreamed to
be a CFO at a hospital one day.
Now I'm a CFO of small business owners.
So that actually worked out in its favor, right?
But at the time in 2015, I was like, you know, I want to be able to help these
women understand their money so that their tax season isn't stressing them out.
, I'm like, okay, I don't have the bandwidth to go back to school, but I do want to
have a way to immediately help them.
And that's when I invested in a program to help me conceptualize
what I learned in accounting and create a bookkeeping business.
So 2016, I started doing bookkeeping for bloggers and small business owners.
They were getting their bookkeeping done by us and then the next gap was, okay,
how do I actually read these reports?
Right?
So I would have monthly meetings with them to help them understand what
their financials are telling them.
And then the next gap was, okay, what do I do with this information?
So, as someone who loves data, right?
I'm like, you know, this type of client did this thing not to share
exactly what it was, but like creating guidelines on, you know, in this
industry, I see clients spending X or investing X on, on this thing.
So this is how, you know, We can improve your business and
seeing how it works for you.
Or say, okay, how can we improve your profit so that you can
pay yourself what you need?
So I was filling in these gaps and then it turned into me helping clients
make their seven figures, right?
Their first seven figures, their first six figures, multi six figure years.
So it was two years when I was into business.
So in 2018, I had since stopped doing the host parent job, which is the
foster mom to adult special needs.
The term is really a post parent to adults with developmental disabilities.
So as I took those two years to kind of transition from that position
into my business, working full time.
And then I hit financial rock bottom.
I was a single mom at the time we moved to an apartment and things were going
great, but I was like overworking myself.
I worked very hard for my clients And while that was very beautiful for
me, I neglected my own financials.
So there were times where I ran into late payments for rent, credit
cards going out of the wazoo, right?
Like I wasn't taking care of myself.
I was just like really focusing on clients and not making better
financial decisions for myself.
At the time when I hit rock bottom was when my car got repossessed.
And I was like, wait, hold on, wait, what?
We got, we got to figure this out.
We got to figure this out.
I neglected my financials to the point where there was something
inside of me mentally not taking accountability for my own financials.
So it was like, all right, if you're not going to take care
of it, this is going to happen.
And hitting rock bottom was like, Oh, I need to treat
myself like I would a client.
How can I give the same grace to my own financials?
Like I would a client and how can I like actually look at my numbers and
create the same steps that I helped my clients improve their numbers
on to myself, you know, like I've witnessed clients go from like 300,
000 to seven figures in next year.
I've witnessed like talking to clients Tax repairs and telling them like, Hey,
we're projecting X amount in the revenue X amount in profit for the next year.
Like, how can we be more proactive?
So I promised myself I would never get to this place again.
And I looked at my numbers, like a fine tooth comb, like a magnifying
glass, because when you are in the airplane, you got to like help
yourself before you help others.
So I turned into, okay, I need to do my numbers first.
I need to do my own bookkeeping, business bookkeeping, personal bookkeeping.
Every single week, look at my reports every single week, every single month.
And that helped me create a.
Finally, a six figure business in 2019.
So I like to say like for the first three years, I was not doing business, right?
So 2016, 17, 18, your girl was not doing business, right?
So finally in 2019, I got my first six figures.
2020, I doubled my income.
2021, I increased my income substantially while still maintaining
healthy profit margins on average of 40 percent because I then.
Change my tax structure to an S corp.
So all that to say things were going well, however, there was a
misstep in how I was then operating my business with team processes
and getting the right fit clients.
And that led to underpricing my services.
Despite me making the most money I've ever made, I left money on the
table because I was underpricing.
And then I was over.
Compensating that underpricing to doing the most for my clients and taking in
non right fit clients, and then also keeping team members that wasn't best
fit for the team for the company overall.
And that led me to have spiritual rock bottom in 2022, you know,
the missteps with My financials, like the systems, right?
Led to my financial rock bottom.
The missteps in my business operations led to my spiritual rock bottom because I
was extremely taxed, physically not taxed.
I was extremely burnt out.
And at the time, you know, found love.
I was expecting, I had got pregnant and I found out New Year's Eve, 2021.
And it really impacted my life because my mental health saw a decrease.
I found out I was pregnant on New Year's Eve, 2021.
And by February 5th, trigger warning, I experienced pregnancy loss.
So that led me into that spiritual rock bottom where I blamed myself because I
was, I was overworking myself and the business started to implode on itself
because of the lack of structure.
So, Team wise and processes wise and getting the right fit or
keeping right fit clients and missteps and mistakes on my front.
Because as a CEO, everything's my fault.
And, and when you're the boss, everything is your fault and it's
your responsibility to improve it.
Right?
So the business took a hit revenue, monthly recurring revenue.
So a constant decreased expenses stayed similar.
And that means profit wasn't where it needs to be.
And at the end, I started to live off of my savings.
And as the dust settled and I started to heal, that's when I was like, okay,
how can I improve my financial picture?
Right.
I want to strategically increase my sales obviously, right.
So that I can pay myself what I need.
And then also be able to just start building the blocks again.
So by mid to late 2023, I finally healed from all types of things, the
pregnancy loss, childhood trauma, money trauma, all these things
I was able to finally heal from.
And now I'm happy to say that I have harmony between my lifestyle, my faith,
my family, my business, and my femininity.
So if you've experienced like a downturn in life that impacted your business.
Trust me.
When I say I understand.
And when the dust settles on your healing, right, you need
to restructure your business.
And unfortunately that includes having a little bit of desperation to get
back to where you want it to be.
So it's really important to share how we need to stop focusing on the money, right?
And focusing on our higher purpose.
So when I think of decentering money, I think of like how women these days
are de censoring men because they have a negative attachment to men
or an obsessive attachment to men.
And we have that same attachment with money.
What was important is learning how to de center money.
De centering money includes neutralizing money in your business so that
you're not reacting to it, right?
Healing from the spirit of rejection, avoiding or healing
that anxiety to make the next sale.
And then also working on your delivery.
And instead of working continuously on client deliverables, working
on marketing and sales to drive business success and growth.
The first thing I did to get off the desperation train when it comes to making
more money or more sales on my business is building trust and my higher purpose.
So usually when it comes to business, we're blindly creating revenue goals.
We're using our own willpower.
We're creating consistent cashflow injection strategies that are to
create new business, new sales.
We're creating new offers.
We're decreasing our prices.
If we're not seeing the sales that we desire or the conversion
of sales that we desire.
And that's the wrong approach to go when it comes to the mindset around making
more money and sales in your business.
So of course, when it comes to higher purpose, is going to be God for me.
And I want to share a scripture.
Zachariah 4, 6 says not by might, nor by power, but by spirit.
I also want to share Proverbs 19, 21.
Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the
Lord's purpose that prevails.
So one thing that was important for me was understanding my higher purpose.
In 2023, after hitting a spiritual rock bottom in 2022,
I was able to fully heal myself.
I'm always in the state of healing, but fully heal the biggest parts of
myself and have a connection with God.
And that led me to really seek what the blueprint of my life is going
to look like, because I'm a true believer that a business should
first serve others and then the business should be supporting you.
So understanding my purpose blueprint is me having a better relationship with God
and maturing in that relationship and learning how to first love God, which
helps me love myself, which helps me love others and loving others helps me serve
them more effectively or more deeply.
So decentering while decentering money and decentering people
or people's ideas, right?
Helped me have a better relationship with them because their thoughts
about me or how the lies I told myself was no longer in the forefront.
It was God in the forefront.
And that helps me show up better for client meetings,
team meetings, or myself, right?
And now like when I'm on these sales calls, I'm able to kind of center
myself, pray for them, pray that they are comfortable enough to tell me exactly
what they need and I'm able to provide them the What I believe is the best
solution, even if it's not going to be me.
And then if that is going to be me, how can we show up in our best selves so
that we can provide them what they need?
When I stopped obsessing about this, I stopped looking at my CRM and
refreshing the page, seeing if someone booked a proposal or accepted it and
trying to continuously follow up.
Right.
Sales became a conversation and holding space for that individual to see what
their, what their pain points were to seeing how I can support them.
So you might be thinking, you know, how can I showcase my business where I speak
about my higher purpose or about God.
And will it turn people away or how do I even find out my higher purpose?
And if you're afraid of how people think about your higher purpose or
how you, how they think about your relationship with God, that means
you are centering their thoughts.
That means that you are idolizing their thoughts about you and
that's hindering you to show God.
at your fullest potential.
And also when it comes to figuring out your purpose,
that doesn't happen overnight.
You know, it happens with, with healing the relationship with self, your
higher purpose with God needs for me in particular, and using your gifts, your
time and your resources to help others.
And I'm getting curious, right?
Before, I would have never dreamed of being a Christian woman.
I would have never dreamed knowing about Jesus and me being curious about
Jesus helped me unpack all of the healing and how much of a servant he
was and how I can be more like him.
And you might be thinking, you know, how can I implement that?
I'm not telling you what to do, but I'm most definitely suggesting that you
kind of work on what it, understanding what your higher, higher purpose is.
We work with our clients, not on the spiritual side, but more so of how can we
help you with your money mindset, right?
That's one of the gifts that we have.
And of course, with a 12 week program, we have a profit planning
intensive that is 12 weeks.
That is not going to get you to a positive money mindset in 12 weeks.
I can't promise that it could potentially help, but we do.
help you get to neutral, right?
And neutral means being able to like soberingly see exactly what's going
on and no longer being afraid of what's happening with your numbers.
But when we have our CFO clients, it definitely helps to work with you
monthly and continuously to be able to get from negative to neutral, neutral
to positive in how we help our clients.
The next phase of getting out of the desperation train, de centering
money and de centering sales in your business is, I said it before,
neutralizing your thoughts around money.
So usually when it comes to money, it's a place of angst.
You have negative thoughts around it.
You avoid it like the plague.
You spend it all when you have it because you don't know when
it's going to come back to you.
You penny pinch or you penny pinch and you're afraid to spend it.
So my approach is first, again, getting you from negative to
neutral because this is going to help you understand your money.
So the first way to get from negative to neutral is first understanding what
you must pay yourself from your business because your business must satisfy, you
Paying yourself, especially if you're a full time entrepreneur you need to
figure out what you need to pay yourself, whether even if you had a 9 to 5, right?
Say, 9 to 5 pays a bulk of your, your living expenses,
but then there's a gap, right?
You can understand what exactly that gap is from your business so that you can.
Create goals that are no longer arbitrary to grow your business.
Another thing when it comes to getting neutral is when you feel like you might
be underpricing or you're decreasing your price to appease the pockets of others is
increasing your boundaries and losing the entitlement and expectations of the sale.
So one way that I did that was, you know, of course my
business needs to pay me, right?
But that person on the other end of the sales call, I'm not entitled
to their money just because I had a conversation with them.
So once I released that expectation, instead of refreshing my CRM screen, I
let it go and When the sale did come in, I'm like, Oh, that's, that's great.
That was, it was a pleasant surprise for me.
Right.
Versus attaching myself to a specific reaction.
In 2023, as I was rebuilding, you know, up until that point my business
grew on referrals and, you know, referrals are great, but then you
can't rely on that a hundred percent.
And you need to be able to market and actually sell.
I realized that my skillset was not in marketing or selling.
And that was okay.
I was able to take a calculated risk and intentional risk on increasing my
skillset and marketing and selling.
And I first invested in million dollar email by Kirsten Rodan.
And that helped me get out of my head and do email marketing.
I was still in the social media hiatus.
So it was great that I didn't have to like do any like social
media marketing at that point.
And then I invested in five figure freedom by Dielle Charon and it was, and
her program was able to help me create a more positive mindset around sales calls,
which are just conversations, right?
And I was able to.
implement her strategies of creating a treatment plan specific to a client,
but maintaining having a product tie service at the end of the day,
but making it personal to them.
So with this being able to understand your numbers and be neutral, you'll be
able to say, okay, what are the gaps in my skillset or the gaps in my business that
I can use to help me improve my business?
Now that I'm also detaching.
Detaching expectation from it.
So you might be thinking, you know, I actually need that sale today.
Like I really do need it.
So to preface this, if you're like an average person, you're not living in
extreme poverty, you're not being taken advantage of, like you're safe, right?
Let's neutralize the thought that while your business does need sales.
You don't need that sale.
You don't need that person there.
You're not entitled to their money, right?
You might need to find alternative ways to create income for your personal
life so that your business, so that you're not stressing yourself out in
your business to make that next sale.
And that can be like even saying, you know, I'll do what it takes.
Whether that is a part time job, if you're a full time business owner,
just to be sure that you're paying your bills or working on effectively
decreasing your personal overhead, right?
Decreasing your personal overhead means like you're decreasing
your monthly bills strategically.
That can be, in my case, like maybe paying off debt, that
can be cutting expenses, right?
So you doing those things can help you be able to not necessarily
feel like you need the sale.
So with us we're different and then a lot of bookkeeping CFO firms
because we care about your financials holistically and when we work with
our clients well figure out like, what are your immediate lifestyle goals?
What do you actually need to pay yourself and how, what do you need in your business
to improve your financial picture?
And that way you get out of the survival train to thriving.
Alrighty, so the third way to stop desperately wanting the sale and
desperately wanting more money is, you know, we went from focusing on
our higher purpose, neutralizing our thoughts around money.
And then now we want to master, our masculine and feminine energy
when it comes to money management.
This is something that is fun because this is the first time I'm publicly,
publicly sharing my energy or masculine and feminine energy philosophy.
And I'm so excited to share.
Usually when it comes to business as a woman, especially, we have
a lot of unbalanced energy.
So we're acting in our masculine a little too much, right?
Or we're insecure, right?
We have that pick me energy.
You want to be chosen.
We don't have a healed attachment style, right?
We have a sense of and we're self sabotaging.
A big, thing that we all should consider is understanding what is
your attachment style to money?
We talk a lot about attachment style in relationships, but
how are we attached to money?
In 2021, I read the book the attachment styles book.
I don't have the actual title.
I'll put that in the show notes.
And it talked about like the different attachment styles of secure,
anxious, avoidant, and disorganized.
And I was Guess which one I was?
Disorganized.
So I had disorganized attachment in relationships, romantic relationships in
particular, where I would be clingy and then distant, detached, then all over you.
I'm going to talk to you too.
I'm just going to ignore you and throw everything out the window.
And that's almost exactly how I was acting with money, right?
It's like, I knew money.
I understood it.
I knew reports.
I worked with it every day.
So Let me just avoid looking at it because I'm helping, I'm going to
help somebody else or how can I, spend this money before it goes away?
I didn't have that mindset to like, have a more healthy relationship with it.
So my approach with this to help others with their energies is like, I'm not
going to say, I am an energetics coach or nothing like that, but more so I can
ask clarifying questions to say, okay, how are they acting in their business?
Is it balanced or how can I ask the right questions so that we can help
you move in a, in a better way?
Once I got neutralized, I was able to gain the practical skills to
shift from neutral to positive.
In the background, while healing myself, I was also investing
in healing my feminine energy.
And I got into cycle syncing, which is like creating a calendar based on your
cycle and how you best perform or slowing down when you need to rest, right?
And I got into some courses and there was a book that I read called
Fascinating Womanhood on late 2023 that really helped me kind of put
everything I learned all together in like one book and implement it.
So, the shorthand, this is going to be fun, masculine energy in
your business, right, comes from knowing, leading, and automating.
Knowing in your masculine energy involves understanding your finances
first and foremost, understanding your business for you, where you're
going, it helps you like actively neutralize your thoughts around it.
And then you know that you're so say if you're nervous.
Once you know you know you're not starting at zero.
When you're looking at your numbers, you're, you're getting
from discomfort and worry to more.
So, okay, I'm aware.
The next area is lead when you're leading your money, because, you
know, you're telling it where to go.
And then you're saying, how can I improve by having maybe multiple income streams?
How am I, how am I dictating where my cashflow should go?
How can I lead my team to follow the vision of the company?
And then the third is automate.
Automate is like having everything on auto pay.
Automate is like having automatic transfers and having your, making sure
all the invoices are paid, bills are paid, having your transfers be automated
through a system like Profit First, allocating your cash, where to go versus
just reacting to it when it comes up.
So with one of our clients, she owns, she has a project based business
and we helped her understand, right?
She knew it.
She led it and now she's able to automate and she's able to automate
her cash flow where she has at all times 50, 000 and more, right?
And she's automating her profit first.
Like her income account comes every 10th and 25th.
It transfers to where it needs to be.
And it's all automated.
This is kind of like a flow where it just flows on its own without
her having to actively think about where her money should be.
And this allows her the confidence, right?
To, you know, acting her feminine when she's at home or even in other areas
of her business because she knows that She's able to attract reoccurring
clients for multiple projects.
She's able to focus on how to deeply work with her clients more because
she's not thinking about cash, right?
She's able to contribute to her retirement and she's able to enjoy her personal life
more because she's having to, she's able to have that automation in her business.
Feminine energy in your business is when you attract, you enjoy, and you magnify So
attracting is being a beautiful place to land when someone comes to your website or
your social media or in your email, right?
Or when you're in their email box.
Another is like, you're a welcoming place to land.
Like you're, you're welcoming, right?
When you're attractive, people pay attention and if you're welcoming,
people want to stay around, right?
And you're no longer underestimating yourself.
You're no longer comparing yourself because you're able to just exist, right?
And know that you have what someone might need.
The right fit client, you know that you have what they need, right?
Another is Enjoy.
When you're able to know, lead, automate, you're able to effortlessly
attract and enjoy, right?
You enjoy what you earn without guilt.
And this is you being able to enjoy what you earn and being able to spend
without worrying and you're able to release your money with love.
Another is the magnify, right?
I like to think of magnify as like when the saying of like, when you
find the right partner you magnify each other and you get even better.
So when you know, lead, automate, you're able to attract and enjoy the more
that you're able to be in existence of that feminine energy, you're
magnetizing, you're getting better with time, you're gaining wisdom to
attract not only, not only the right fit clients, but you're helping them
attract their right fit clients or attracting and helping in their business.
And, and you're able to magnify and, and, Reach more people.
One of our clients she has a coaching business and we've been
working with her for years, right?
, before she even had six figures, we've been working with her.
So very long relationship.
, we had helped her get first neutral to her money and getting neutral in her money
left her the ability to work on her own, like a positive money mindset on her own.
And she was able to understand what was happening in her business.
When she had that deep understanding, she was able to then work
on her own feminine energy.
And now she's able to showcase and show up in a healthy way when it comes to
earning money and lovingly releasing it.
So knowing the positive or the balanced version of those energies, here's
how to know that they're unbalanced.
First, When you know that you have an unbalanced masculine energy is when you're
competitive, you're overly controlling, and you're obsessive, you're defensive,
and you're so rooted with your spending.
Okay.
When it comes to the unhealed feminine version of your energy, when it comes
to money and in your business or selling is sitting in that spirit of
rejection, feeling insecure, right?
Like you're, you're triggered all the time.
You lack that energy.
Emotional control.
And that, that doesn't mean that you're irate with all your customers,
but you just kind of with yourself, like you're looking at yourself,
like, and you, it's hard to control how you feel and you, you're scared
because now there's no provision or leadership on the masculine energy side.
So now you're just like, I don't know what's going on.
And you're splurging, right?
You go, it goes from enjoyment to overconsumption.
Just enjoying a little bit too much and then now you didn't have
a provision of how to spend it You're just gonna spend it all
So when it comes to getting neutral or finding some balance if again first comes
to understanding what's going on, right?
So with our clients we do our money education session to help
you understand what's going on.
We do your cashflow forecast to say, okay, this is the gaps in cash based
on the particular week of the year.
And then this allows you to space, like once you neutralize and you
kind of understand what's going on, you're able to then take that time to
actively heal your feminine energy.
So I hope this helped you.
Let me know in the comments below if you're watching on the YouTube version,
which energy have you most recently been operating in your business?
Is it more of the masculine or feminine energy?
How has that been impacting how you show up on business sales?
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