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Kevin Lowe: Whether this is your first time ever pressing play on this podcast,
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Kevin Lowe: which if it is, well, welcome.
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Kevin Lowe: Or if you've been here since the beginning, I hope you find one thing to be true.
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Kevin Lowe: Is that this is a podcast that you can come to expecting to leave with a smile.
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Kevin Lowe: Leave having gained a new maybe view on life. Seeing life from an angle you've
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Kevin Lowe: never viewed it from before.
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Kevin Lowe: Sometimes I do that through inspiring stories, motivating tales,
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Kevin Lowe: or sometimes it's through those heart-centered conversations about life,
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Kevin Lowe: the stuff that we can all connect with.
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Kevin Lowe: Today, my friend, is one of those stories.
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Kevin Lowe: It's an interview with a father talking about his son.
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Kevin Lowe: Today's guest is Christopher Cochran, but the story is about his son, Christian Cochran.
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Kevin Lowe: Today is going to be a lesson in how to live, but also how to die,
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Kevin Lowe: all taught to us by a young man who left this world too soon.
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Kevin Lowe: And yet, in some way, it was like it was all planned out this way because.
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Kevin Lowe: Well, he packed a lot into the years that he was here on Earth.
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Kevin Lowe: And the legacy he leaves behind is far lasting.
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Kevin Lowe: It made an impact on me the moment that I heard about this story.
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Kevin Lowe: When I sat down and I had Christopher Cochran on the podcast and we recorded
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Kevin Lowe: today's episode, it totally changed my life.
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Kevin Lowe: And my friend, I can only hope and pray that it's going to do the same for you.
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Kevin Lowe: Because by the end of today's episode, I'm going to have you waking up tomorrow
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Kevin Lowe: morning, asking yourself a very important, yet so simple of a question.
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Kevin Lowe: What's good about today?
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Kevin Lowe: With that, my friend, I welcome you to an episode that I hope is going to completely
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Kevin Lowe: change your life from this day forward.
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Kevin Lowe: I welcome you to episode 361. Hey, I'm your host, Kevin Lowe,
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Kevin Lowe: and you are listening to Grit, Grace, and Inspiration.
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Kevin Lowe: I am here in the studio today with a guy I have been so excited to get to talk to again.
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Kevin Lowe: Chris, welcome to the podcast, man.
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Christopher Cochran: Hey, thank you so much, Kevin. I'm so excited to be here with you.
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Christopher Cochran: And I knew we were getting together again.
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Christopher Cochran: The other time was, of course, off air, but just excited to talk to you.
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Christopher Cochran: You always bring such a light to so many conversations. So thank you again.
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Kevin Lowe: Oh, man, I appreciate that very much. Well, well, listen, so obviously the story
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Kevin Lowe: of your son, Christian, is going to be a big part of our conversation today.
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Kevin Lowe: But before even just diving into his story specifically, would you mind just
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Kevin Lowe: kind of giving me an overview of your family before diagnoses,
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Kevin Lowe: before any of that drama?
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Kevin Lowe: What was just family like for you?
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Christopher Cochran: Yeah, I grew up in central Pennsylvania in a small town called Camp Hill, Pennsylvania.
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Christopher Cochran: I have four brothers. I had two loving parents.
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Christopher Cochran: My parents were good people. My mother was a church-going woman,
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Christopher Cochran: so I spent my Sundays going to church.
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Christopher Cochran: Even when I didn't want to, my mother would make sure I was there.
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Christopher Cochran: I grew up very competitively in a competitive environment with brothers.
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Christopher Cochran: I was a wrestler in high school.
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Christopher Cochran: I wrestled in college at the University of Tennessee.
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Christopher Cochran: And so I was raised, you know, in this atmosphere. My father was a Navy guy.
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Christopher Cochran: He was a frogman, which predates the seal.
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Christopher Cochran: So you can imagine growing up in this atmosphere of very loving,
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Christopher Cochran: very tough, and really driving me to be a better person.
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Christopher Cochran: And so I made my way through high school, like lots of people.
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Christopher Cochran: And I was very blessed that this is now 40 years ago. So I was invited to a
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Christopher Cochran: party by a good friend of mine. His name's Brian.
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Christopher Cochran: It was an upperclassman party. I got to go to the party. As I entered the party,
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Christopher Cochran: I was going up a flight of stairs.
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Christopher Cochran: We passed these two girls coming down the stairs. It's the second girl that I made eye contact with.
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Christopher Cochran: And we had a sparkle, you know, sort of like being that this was the 80s,
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Christopher Cochran: like a slowdown version of a movie where you have this connection with someone.
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Christopher Cochran: We didn't talk at all. We didn't say anything. I knew she was an upperclassman.
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Christopher Cochran: Two grades ahead of me, but the next day, I never talked to her that night,
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Christopher Cochran: but the next day she showed up at my house
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Christopher Cochran: I wasn't there. She left a note on a paper plate with my little brother.
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Christopher Cochran: And he gave me that note and said, this girl came by, she was driving a really
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Christopher Cochran: beautiful car, Mercedes, and he was more enamored by that.
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Christopher Cochran: But the name stood out. Her name was Danielle.
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Christopher Cochran: And I said, Danielle, why would she be reaching out to me?
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Christopher Cochran: And so I decided to make this phone call. And I'm glad I did.
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Christopher Cochran: We decided to go on a date. She asked me out to the movies. We went to the movies
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Christopher Cochran: and we had a beautiful relationship, continue to have that. I'm married to her.
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Christopher Cochran: We've been married now, what, 30 years? We dated for 10.
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Christopher Cochran: And so we started the American dream.
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Christopher Cochran: We dreamed of having children. And that led us to the point where we had three beautiful children.
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Christopher Cochran: And so it continues to this day that we are together and sharing life's journeys of ups and downs.
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Christopher Cochran: And certainly, as we'll talk about, the journey of losing our firstborn child,
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Christopher Cochran: Christian, but I came from a good family and I'm very blessed to have had that along the way.
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Kevin Lowe: Yeah, I love it so much. Talk to me a little bit about your three kids.
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Kevin Lowe: I'd love to hear a little bit about each one of them.
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Christopher Cochran: So Christian is our oldest. He is 26. My daughter is 25.
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Christopher Cochran: She's located in Norfolk, Virginia. She is the wife of a naval officer who actually
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Christopher Cochran: serves overseas on the USS Cole right now in the Middle East.
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Christopher Cochran: So he's definitely involved in things that are going on over there.
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Christopher Cochran: He's on deployment. My younger son, Nicholas, is currently enrolled as a junior
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Christopher Cochran: at the University of Indiana, Pennsylvania.
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Christopher Cochran: That's where all my kids went to school. And so all of them are wonderful kids, all different.
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Christopher Cochran: They always say, when you have these kids, you think they're going to be somewhat
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Christopher Cochran: similar, but they couldn't be more different from one another and how they go about things.
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Christopher Cochran: So it does challenge you as a parent as you navigate this life,
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Christopher Cochran: but they're all wonderful children. And I love seeing them every moment I get.
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Kevin Lowe: Absolutely. I just, I wanted to ask that question just because as we continue
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Kevin Lowe: our conversation today, I just want to be sure that I recognize the fact that
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Kevin Lowe: what happens as we talk about the story about your son, Christian,
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Kevin Lowe: I'm sure it's something that has impacted your entire family,
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Kevin Lowe: each one individually, as well as a whole.
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Kevin Lowe: And so as we go today, I just want everyone to understand that we're not just
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Kevin Lowe: talking about you and your son, we're talking about a family.
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Christopher Cochran: Yeah, absolutely. All of us have been affected by this.
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Christopher Cochran: We still continue to this day, and it's only been three years,
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Christopher Cochran: but we navigate, but we're close. You know, that's the thing.
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Christopher Cochran: You know, we support one another, and that's critical when you go through things like this.
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Christopher Cochran: And we all have our ways of navigating grief and how we go about it.
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Christopher Cochran: It's not an easy task by any means, but we're not going to be able to do it.
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Christopher Cochran: But we love one another and we've always been close.
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Christopher Cochran: So it's just an extenuation of things.
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Christopher Cochran: But much like life, you just you have these difficult moments as everyone's going to have.
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Christopher Cochran: Right. It's it's inevitable in this life that everyone things are going to turn on a dime.
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Christopher Cochran: And the question is, how do you react to it? How do you approach life going forward after that?
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Christopher Cochran: Do you give up? Do you not give up? How do you interact with others?
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Christopher Cochran: And so, yeah, I have a beautiful family that has been hit by this tremendously,
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Christopher Cochran: and we all do it in different ways, but we're there to support each other.
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Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. Well, I guess if you wouldn't mind, would you kind of start
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Kevin Lowe: diving into the story about your son, Christian?
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Kevin Lowe: Obviously, the whole reason that we're here is because of him and the life he
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Kevin Lowe: lived and the legacy he's left. And so I would love for you to kind of take
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Kevin Lowe: it from where you think the best part is, is to start to share his story.
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Christopher Cochran: Well, Christian, yeah, I love talking about Christian. I love talking about
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Christopher Cochran: my kids. So all of them, by the way.
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Christopher Cochran: But Christian in particular, obviously first born, you know,
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Christopher Cochran: after we got married and for a couple of years enjoyed the blissful life of
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Christopher Cochran: marriage, we decided to have a child.
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Christopher Cochran: We knew right from the get-go we were going to name him Christian because we
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Christopher Cochran: knew he was destined for extraordinary things and felt the name was fitting for him.
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Christopher Cochran: Ever since he was born, he was extraordinarily different from everyone else.
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Christopher Cochran: He had this innate ability to show empathy for others.
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Christopher Cochran: Even as a young child, it was quite extraordinary. We would always refer to him as Mr. Comfort.
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Christopher Cochran: And he could comfort my wife when she was going through her birth with the other
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Christopher Cochran: children when they were born, just to let her know that he loved her and he was proud of her.
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Christopher Cochran: And it's something unusual you see in a child.
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Christopher Cochran: So even as Christian was getting older, and I remember when he was eight years
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Christopher Cochran: old, the first day at the bus stop, you know, all kids are clamoring to get
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Christopher Cochran: on that bus, but not Christian.
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Christopher Cochran: He wanted all his friends to get on first. They all would want to be next to each other.
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Christopher Cochran: And he would then let the special needs kids go on next. And he would always be the last one.
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Christopher Cochran: And he did that because it brought him joy to see others find joy.
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Christopher Cochran: Right. And so much of this world we're filled with what's good for me.
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Christopher Cochran: What can I get out of this? And that's not how he operated. even as a young boy.
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Christopher Cochran: And so that carried on. Even as a teenager, we witnessed things and how he was
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Christopher Cochran: giving all of himself to others, whether it was through a smile, laughter.
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Christopher Cochran: He was extremely funny. He just brought he just when he walked into a room,
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Christopher Cochran: he lit it up and you wanted to spend time with him because you just were drawn in to his presence.
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Christopher Cochran: And so ultimately, you know, Christian went to college.
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Christopher Cochran: He went to Indiana University of Pennsylvania, graduated from the honors college
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Christopher Cochran: there. He came back in 2020 at the end of 2020.
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Christopher Cochran: And I remember this was during COVID and he had some back pain and we treated it as such.
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Christopher Cochran: We saw doctors. They said it was nothing because he was incredibly healthy kid.
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Christopher Cochran: And ultimately the pain had gotten so great. We eventually went and got tests, had to have CT scans.
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Christopher Cochran: We were brought into a room. This was during COVID. It was just myself and Christian.
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Christopher Cochran: And the doctors all walked in, their faces were covered. You could only see their eyes.
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Christopher Cochran: But I knew as soon as they walked in the door, they were about to deliver the
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Christopher Cochran: news, the worst news possible for Christian and ultimately what we were all
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Christopher Cochran: going to have to deal with as a family.
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Christopher Cochran: And they told him that he had a cancer and ultimately it was a terminal cancer.
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Christopher Cochran: He had a grapefruit sized tumor on his liver.
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Christopher Cochran: And I'll never forget the first of many acts of superpower. Christian looked
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Christopher Cochran: at me, my knees were buckling. He put his hand on my and he said,
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Christopher Cochran: Don't worry, everything's going to be okay. And he calmly asked the doctors
00:11:18.934 --> 00:11:20.194
Christopher Cochran: how much time he had to live.
00:11:20.354 --> 00:11:23.494
Christopher Cochran: They didn't want to answer that question. And of course, I had to go home and
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Christopher Cochran: we had to have this discussion with his mom. And when we told Christian how
00:11:26.794 --> 00:11:31.894
Christopher Cochran: sorry we were, how difficult this was, he said, it's okay, mom and dad.
00:11:32.114 --> 00:11:36.254
Christopher Cochran: I wouldn't want this on anyone. This is my burden and it's okay.
00:11:36.494 --> 00:11:40.374
Christopher Cochran: He was very accepting of it and not a moment from the day he was diagnosed,
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Christopher Cochran: which was August 26th of 2020 to the moment that he took his last breath with
00:11:46.614 --> 00:11:51.034
Christopher Cochran: us around him here at home on September 1st of 2021,
00:11:51.394 --> 00:11:55.234
Christopher Cochran: almost a little over a year, did he ever complain once?
00:11:55.374 --> 00:11:58.194
Christopher Cochran: He never said, why me? Why did this happen to me?
00:11:58.574 --> 00:12:02.194
Christopher Cochran: Quite the contrary. He would remind us every day, he would say,
00:12:02.474 --> 00:12:05.354
Christopher Cochran: what's good about today? With a question.
00:12:06.014 --> 00:12:08.774
Christopher Cochran: And when we were down, he would say, what's good about today.
00:12:09.074 --> 00:12:12.614
Christopher Cochran: And it would help us remind us that there is beauty. There is wonder.
00:12:13.014 --> 00:12:19.734
Christopher Cochran: There's so many special things that are in this day that we have to focus on, not the negative.
00:12:19.854 --> 00:12:23.914
Christopher Cochran: And there are plenty of bad days, but we try to focus on the good because it's
00:12:23.914 --> 00:12:26.434
Christopher Cochran: a choice, right? It's a choice we can all make.
00:12:26.594 --> 00:12:30.874
Christopher Cochran: And Christian left that legacy with us. And so that's what inspired myself,
00:12:31.054 --> 00:12:34.614
Christopher Cochran: of course, to write the book, What's Good About Today, A Purpose Driven Life,
00:12:34.754 --> 00:12:40.134
Christopher Cochran: to document this love story as a family. So that's Christian.
00:12:40.874 --> 00:12:46.974
Kevin Lowe: Wow. Remind me again how old he was when you guys received this diagnosis.
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Christopher Cochran: So Christian was diagnosed at 22 years of age.
00:12:50.714 --> 00:12:54.814
Christopher Cochran: Like I said, just graduating college, ready to take off. He was I glowed on
00:12:54.814 --> 00:12:56.934
Christopher Cochran: him. And I always hear that tap on my shoulder.
00:12:57.054 --> 00:13:01.314
Christopher Cochran: Dad, don't talk too much about me because he was so humble, you know,
00:13:01.394 --> 00:13:03.314
Christopher Cochran: but you're a dad. This is what you do.
00:13:03.534 --> 00:13:06.874
Christopher Cochran: You talk about your kids. You love your kids. But he was so talented.
00:13:07.474 --> 00:13:10.734
Christopher Cochran: I mean, the most important part is that he was so loving and caring and loved
00:13:10.734 --> 00:13:14.994
Christopher Cochran: us as parents and loved his family. But he was a talented actor on stage.
00:13:15.594 --> 00:13:20.434
Christopher Cochran: He was always the lead in every musical, every play. He had already been in
00:13:20.434 --> 00:13:22.594
Christopher Cochran: a major motion picture of the Batman movie.
00:13:23.154 --> 00:13:28.234
Christopher Cochran: And actually, he was a paid actor in that movie. And so he was ready to take off.
00:13:28.334 --> 00:13:32.734
Christopher Cochran: He was doing so many wonderful things with his life and making an impact.
00:13:33.114 --> 00:13:39.154
Christopher Cochran: But yeah, hit it 22, passed away. actually at the age of 23 on his sister's
00:13:39.154 --> 00:13:42.734
Christopher Cochran: birthday, Kate, September 1st, which I'm not surprised about.
00:13:42.814 --> 00:13:45.094
Christopher Cochran: They were extremely close. They were 15 months apart.
00:13:45.434 --> 00:13:48.074
Christopher Cochran: So he died on that day.
00:13:48.674 --> 00:13:59.814
Kevin Lowe: Wow. How do you as a parent even begin that year to be told that your son has a year to live,
00:14:00.054 --> 00:14:04.194
Kevin Lowe: especially for the fact that we're not supposed to know when we're going to die?
00:14:04.838 --> 00:14:07.938
Kevin Lowe: And yet you guys found that out.
00:14:08.238 --> 00:14:13.438
Kevin Lowe: How do you even how do you even keep living for that year?
00:14:13.738 --> 00:14:16.758
Christopher Cochran: Well, I think our motivation was to try to save Christian. Right.
00:14:16.898 --> 00:14:21.438
Christopher Cochran: There was a less than one percent chance he could even make it to five years.
00:14:21.878 --> 00:14:28.558
Christopher Cochran: So I knew the odds were stacked against us. I never told my wife and my kids the statistics. Right.
00:14:28.858 --> 00:14:32.898
Christopher Cochran: I knew what they were. I had private conversations with doctors that this was
00:14:32.898 --> 00:14:35.598
Christopher Cochran: not going to be an easy journey.
00:14:35.698 --> 00:14:39.438
Christopher Cochran: But we threw everything we could to save Christian.
00:14:39.598 --> 00:14:43.558
Christopher Cochran: And Christian entrusted his family, trusted my wife and I, his aunt and his
00:14:43.558 --> 00:14:46.338
Christopher Cochran: uncle, to, we called it the CC Advisory Group,
00:14:46.718 --> 00:14:54.578
Christopher Cochran: to focus on a 24-7 operation where we researched every possible avenue to save
00:14:54.578 --> 00:14:57.818
Christopher Cochran: his life, whether it was experimental drugs.
00:14:58.398 --> 00:15:02.798
Christopher Cochran: Certainly, immediately, we got him on the standard of care in this world.
00:15:03.098 --> 00:15:05.058
Christopher Cochran: The standard of care in cancer is chemotherapy.
00:15:05.818 --> 00:15:10.518
Christopher Cochran: And you go right to that. Literally, I think we found out on a Saturday or Friday.
00:15:10.758 --> 00:15:16.158
Christopher Cochran: By Monday, he was on it. And he was being hit with the most powerful chemotherapy
00:15:16.158 --> 00:15:17.558
Christopher Cochran: drugs that were out there.
00:15:18.178 --> 00:15:20.838
Christopher Cochran: And we were just trying to knock this thing down.
00:15:22.518 --> 00:15:27.738
Christopher Cochran: And it's such a strong cancer. He had what's called cholangiocarcinoma.
00:15:27.818 --> 00:15:31.718
Christopher Cochran: And it's, by definition, it's called bio-duck cancer.
00:15:31.878 --> 00:15:35.538
Christopher Cochran: The bio-duck is connected to the liver, but ultimately it's what filters out
00:15:35.538 --> 00:15:37.518
Christopher Cochran: all the badness in our body.
00:15:37.598 --> 00:15:41.798
Christopher Cochran: But you can imagine it already at stage four, grapefruit size on his liver,
00:15:42.338 --> 00:15:45.378
Christopher Cochran: had already had started to spread to his lymph nodes.
00:15:45.958 --> 00:15:52.498
Christopher Cochran: He had ultimately kept it at bay for months, but we knew that this was,
00:15:52.658 --> 00:15:54.518
Christopher Cochran: the chemo was not gonna be the answer.
00:15:54.618 --> 00:16:00.798
Christopher Cochran: So we were always researching DNA, RNA factors, we went to every DNA facilities
00:16:00.798 --> 00:16:05.938
Christopher Cochran: to the molecular level to break down his DNAs and find out if there were any
00:16:05.938 --> 00:16:09.538
Christopher Cochran: drugs on the market that could sustain his life.
00:16:09.738 --> 00:16:12.798
Christopher Cochran: And we did, here's the thing about this cancer.
00:16:13.878 --> 00:16:16.358
Christopher Cochran: It's only really seen mostly in older people,
00:16:17.163 --> 00:16:23.823
Christopher Cochran: and in Southeast Asia. Not a kid in Northwest Pennsylvania, right?
00:16:23.963 --> 00:16:28.123
Christopher Cochran: It's just not something you see. So it was extremely unusual.
00:16:29.003 --> 00:16:34.323
Christopher Cochran: And we just knew that we were up against some major odds. He did too.
00:16:34.583 --> 00:16:39.743
Christopher Cochran: I think he knew even when he was diagnosed what was going on.
00:16:39.883 --> 00:16:44.103
Christopher Cochran: He had already accepted this, I think, a long time ago, even before he had cancer.
00:16:44.143 --> 00:16:46.263
Christopher Cochran: I think he lived such a big life.
00:16:46.503 --> 00:16:51.603
Christopher Cochran: So I think he understood that. So I think for us, our focus to answer your question
00:16:51.603 --> 00:16:52.763
Christopher Cochran: is we focused on Christian.
00:16:53.023 --> 00:16:56.523
Christopher Cochran: That's what kept us going. We had hope. You always have hope, right?
00:16:56.683 --> 00:16:59.823
Christopher Cochran: You always feel like you're going to be that outlier. But Christian knew,
00:16:59.963 --> 00:17:04.163
Christopher Cochran: and I'd had private conversations with him. He knew his time was coming to an end.
00:17:04.383 --> 00:17:08.703
Christopher Cochran: And so, but that's tough. It's tough to keep in as a parent and stuff to,
00:17:08.843 --> 00:17:10.483
Christopher Cochran: but to remain hopeful, right?
00:17:10.663 --> 00:17:13.243
Christopher Cochran: And tell him like, Like, hey, we're going to keep moving forward.
00:17:13.483 --> 00:17:21.023
Kevin Lowe: At what point did you come to the realization that he wasn't going to get better?
00:17:21.483 --> 00:17:26.783
Christopher Cochran: Well, I think probably I'm going to say three months prior to his passing.
00:17:27.003 --> 00:17:29.583
Christopher Cochran: I think that nothing was working.
00:17:29.843 --> 00:17:32.323
Christopher Cochran: The cancer had spread to his bones recently.
00:17:32.728 --> 00:17:37.048
Christopher Cochran: We knew, I knew of extremely aggressive cancer. But I think,
00:17:37.228 --> 00:17:40.428
Christopher Cochran: you know, look, I still held out hope even three months in it.
00:17:40.588 --> 00:17:45.108
Christopher Cochran: I think about a month and a half prior was when you could really see Christian's
00:17:45.108 --> 00:17:47.428
Christopher Cochran: cancer take over his body.
00:17:47.808 --> 00:17:52.848
Christopher Cochran: And there's nothing worse. My son, and people can see pictures of him.
00:17:52.948 --> 00:17:54.208
Christopher Cochran: He's absolutely gorgeous kid.
00:17:54.368 --> 00:18:00.348
Christopher Cochran: He's a beautiful kid and curly brown hair and brown eyes and just the best smile ever.
00:18:00.348 --> 00:18:04.628
Christopher Cochran: But when you see that dwindle away what cancer does to someone,
00:18:04.788 --> 00:18:10.448
Christopher Cochran: it just takes their body and it debilitates them down. He couldn't walk.
00:18:11.228 --> 00:18:15.668
Christopher Cochran: His bones were being affected. Everything was being invaded by the cancer.
00:18:15.828 --> 00:18:22.468
Christopher Cochran: And so you see a beautiful child just sort of fade away in terms of his body,
00:18:22.468 --> 00:18:25.168
Christopher Cochran: not his mind. He still had his mind.
00:18:25.948 --> 00:18:29.028
Christopher Cochran: So those are kind of the different points. It's different moments.
00:18:29.028 --> 00:18:34.228
Christopher Cochran: You know, I think you go through that process of, hey, we had good results and
00:18:34.228 --> 00:18:38.108
Christopher Cochran: you hang on to that and then you don't. But yeah.
00:18:38.788 --> 00:18:42.388
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. During this time, this year
00:18:42.388 --> 00:18:48.988
Kevin Lowe: that you guys had in the midst of cancer treatment, the sadness of it all.
00:18:49.148 --> 00:18:54.528
Kevin Lowe: Talk to me about some of the times that you look back on and that they make you smile.
00:18:55.328 --> 00:19:00.088
Kevin Lowe: That something maybe that Christian did that he said and experienced?
00:19:00.588 --> 00:19:04.508
Kevin Lowe: Because I know there has to be moments that you smile.
00:19:05.048 --> 00:19:08.488
Christopher Cochran: Oh, yeah. Wow, there's so many. I mean, that's the thing about Christian is
00:19:08.488 --> 00:19:12.668
Christopher Cochran: he never, like I said, never complained, but he was always making jokes and
00:19:12.668 --> 00:19:16.168
Christopher Cochran: having fun, making us laugh, making others laugh.
00:19:16.168 --> 00:19:19.908
Christopher Cochran: He always wanted to be all of himself when someone would come visit Christian.
00:19:20.108 --> 00:19:21.328
Christopher Cochran: Remember, this is during COVID, right?
00:19:21.970 --> 00:19:26.370
Christopher Cochran: So when someone would come to see him, it was tough for Christian because he's
00:19:26.370 --> 00:19:30.870
Christopher Cochran: the entertainer and he wants he doesn't want you to feel sad for him.
00:19:30.950 --> 00:19:32.670
Christopher Cochran: He never wanted to be that kid with cancer.
00:19:32.810 --> 00:19:35.190
Christopher Cochran: He used to tell me like, Dad, I don't want to be known for that.
00:19:35.470 --> 00:19:39.410
Christopher Cochran: You know, I don't want to be known for that. I want to be known for positivity
00:19:39.410 --> 00:19:43.310
Christopher Cochran: and the good things. And so he would always do things to make us laugh.
00:19:43.450 --> 00:19:48.790
Christopher Cochran: He loved video games. So I remember setting him up in near our living room so
00:19:48.790 --> 00:19:50.130
Christopher Cochran: I could have visual of him.
00:19:50.710 --> 00:19:55.390
Christopher Cochran: So I never lost touch with Christian. I never wanted to miss a reaction.
00:19:55.550 --> 00:19:58.370
Christopher Cochran: His laughter with his friends talking on TeamSpeak or something.
00:19:58.590 --> 00:20:00.490
Christopher Cochran: He had this infectious laugh.
00:20:00.730 --> 00:20:04.370
Christopher Cochran: But I will tell you a story. Christian, we went on a walk together and we would
00:20:04.370 --> 00:20:08.610
Christopher Cochran: go on these different walks when he could walk just to keep his health up.
00:20:08.770 --> 00:20:12.770
Christopher Cochran: And I remember going on this walk and Christian said to me, I said,
00:20:12.830 --> 00:20:16.410
Christopher Cochran: I said to Christian, I said, Christian, do you have any regrets in life?
00:20:16.670 --> 00:20:19.370
Christopher Cochran: Do you have anything that you wish you had done differently?
00:20:20.870 --> 00:20:25.530
Christopher Cochran: And I remember Christian looking at me seriously and saying, yeah, I have a regret.
00:20:25.650 --> 00:20:28.430
Christopher Cochran: And I hung on every moment of that because I was like, to me,
00:20:28.510 --> 00:20:31.310
Christopher Cochran: Christian was such a philosopher of life and understood it so well.
00:20:31.490 --> 00:20:36.290
Christopher Cochran: He said, I said, well, what is it? He said, I wish I hadn't done so much homework.
00:20:36.810 --> 00:20:41.850
Christopher Cochran: And I started laughing. I said, Christian, I go, come on, tell me what are you
00:20:41.850 --> 00:20:44.190
Christopher Cochran: regretting? Is there anything? He says, no, dad.
00:20:44.450 --> 00:20:47.170
Christopher Cochran: I just wish I hadn't done so much homework. Look where I'm at.
00:20:47.230 --> 00:20:49.150
Christopher Cochran: I did too much homework during this time.
00:20:49.370 --> 00:20:52.910
Christopher Cochran: And it made me chuckle. It was a joke. And it was the way he brought levity
00:20:52.910 --> 00:20:56.310
Christopher Cochran: to a situation. He always had a way of bringing things back into order.
00:20:56.590 --> 00:21:03.010
Christopher Cochran: And so it's just his normal, he had such a great comedic timing and how to approach things.
00:21:03.170 --> 00:21:09.190
Christopher Cochran: And so that I remember very distinctly and how he brought lots of laughs to
00:21:09.190 --> 00:21:11.350
Christopher Cochran: everyone who was around him, especially his family.
00:21:11.630 --> 00:21:16.930
Kevin Lowe: You know, I listened to this and I think Christian, he was...
00:21:17.955 --> 00:21:25.315
Kevin Lowe: The let's say the patient the person who's sick and yet he's also the one who
00:21:25.315 --> 00:21:31.535
Kevin Lowe: wants to be sure that everybody around him is okay he doesn't want you guys
00:21:31.535 --> 00:21:33.395
Kevin Lowe: to be sad that's powerful.
00:21:33.395 --> 00:21:40.335
Christopher Cochran: Yeah yeah he always he always did that even up to the uh again a they're tough
00:21:40.335 --> 00:21:45.395
Christopher Cochran: moments the last three weeks of his life when he could speak he i remember him
00:21:45.395 --> 00:21:50.195
Christopher Cochran: saying dad he was so knowledge he was so mature and he, and he said, dad,
00:21:50.415 --> 00:21:54.535
Christopher Cochran: you've got two beautiful children to take care of and you're going to,
00:21:54.655 --> 00:21:57.395
Christopher Cochran: they're going to need you more than ever during this time.
00:21:57.555 --> 00:22:02.575
Christopher Cochran: And so he, yeah, he, he was, and here he is thinking about his brother and sister,
00:22:03.335 --> 00:22:04.995
Christopher Cochran: thinking about me and his mom.
00:22:05.155 --> 00:22:09.215
Christopher Cochran: And so he didn't think in terms of, you know, what's next for,
00:22:09.375 --> 00:22:10.635
Christopher Cochran: you know, he knew where he was going.
00:22:10.775 --> 00:22:13.915
Christopher Cochran: He knew what was next. And he, and we had those conversations where he knew
00:22:13.915 --> 00:22:16.735
Christopher Cochran: he's going after this. He was very confident in that.
00:22:17.115 --> 00:22:21.635
Christopher Cochran: To him, honestly, death was just another journey.
00:22:21.835 --> 00:22:29.335
Christopher Cochran: It wasn't a problem for him. He took it as an adventure, the biggest adventure of his life.
00:22:29.495 --> 00:22:34.095
Christopher Cochran: He loved adventures. He had traveled the world, studied abroad, been to India.
00:22:34.435 --> 00:22:39.735
Christopher Cochran: So this was just another journey for him. But he did care about everybody and
00:22:39.735 --> 00:22:42.155
Christopher Cochran: how they felt. That was the biggest impact for him.
00:22:42.155 --> 00:22:46.675
Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. So, so amazing.
00:22:47.115 --> 00:22:52.015
Kevin Lowe: And what a just an amazing son that you raised.
00:22:52.455 --> 00:22:57.415
Kevin Lowe: What you just said, it really just kind of segues into the next kind of question
00:22:57.415 --> 00:23:03.675
Kevin Lowe: I wanted to ask you to talk about was, how do you guys do some outreach?
00:23:03.695 --> 00:23:08.475
Kevin Lowe: I know you guys did something with your church and you set up an organization.
00:23:08.915 --> 00:23:11.655
Kevin Lowe: Talk to me about that whole aspect.
00:23:12.500 --> 00:23:15.940
Christopher Cochran: Yeah, we set up what's called the Christian Cochran Legacy Fund.
00:23:16.100 --> 00:23:20.220
Christopher Cochran: It's through the Pittsburgh Foundation. I should actually say we didn't set
00:23:20.220 --> 00:23:23.840
Christopher Cochran: this up. My son Christian set it up, if you can believe that.
00:23:24.640 --> 00:23:30.040
Christopher Cochran: Prior to his death, he wanted us to set up a foundation that stuck to his core
00:23:30.040 --> 00:23:36.520
Christopher Cochran: values, his mission, which was to care for others, to give to others that are less fortunate.
00:23:36.780 --> 00:23:39.040
Christopher Cochran: He loved animals. He loved nature.
00:23:40.060 --> 00:23:45.540
Christopher Cochran: So he is really the person who set the foundation up. He guided me in where
00:23:45.540 --> 00:23:47.980
Christopher Cochran: I needed to go, knowing this was the ultimate outcome.
00:23:48.380 --> 00:23:51.520
Christopher Cochran: And he also wanted us to make sure we gave back to a church.
00:23:51.740 --> 00:23:52.820
Christopher Cochran: This is a church called St.
00:23:53.280 --> 00:23:58.000
Christopher Cochran: Stanislav's. It's the oldest Polish church in Pittsburgh. It's located in downtown Pittsburgh.
00:23:58.300 --> 00:24:01.740
Christopher Cochran: It's located in the most urban and awesome area of Pittsburgh.
00:24:02.000 --> 00:24:04.840
Christopher Cochran: It's the hottest area in Pittsburgh, big crowds.
00:24:05.200 --> 00:24:08.200
Christopher Cochran: And right next to the church on the main street and 21st Street.
00:24:08.620 --> 00:24:15.300
Christopher Cochran: You cannot miss this. There are six boulders that are each a ton in weight that
00:24:15.300 --> 00:24:19.600
Christopher Cochran: have holes drilled through them with water coming out through the top and pouring
00:24:19.600 --> 00:24:22.880
Christopher Cochran: over these rocks with a beautiful angel in the middle and a beautiful plaque
00:24:22.880 --> 00:24:25.240
Christopher Cochran: called the What's Good About Today fountain.
00:24:25.420 --> 00:24:27.780
Christopher Cochran: It has a picture of Christian. It talks about Christian's legacy.
00:24:28.060 --> 00:24:31.920
Christopher Cochran: And on those things, he said, be kind to everyone because you never know what
00:24:31.920 --> 00:24:33.400
Christopher Cochran: someone is going through.
00:24:34.320 --> 00:24:37.060
Christopher Cochran: And so that's written there it's in
00:24:37.060 --> 00:24:40.380
Christopher Cochran: bronze it's it's beautiful picture of him but it's
00:24:40.380 --> 00:24:44.860
Christopher Cochran: seen by thousands and thousands and thousands of people across this country
00:24:44.860 --> 00:24:47.740
Christopher Cochran: and the world we've heard from people from all over the world who have seen
00:24:47.740 --> 00:24:51.780
Christopher Cochran: this and come and it's become a bit of a destination where people come to pittsburgh
00:24:51.780 --> 00:24:56.580
Christopher Cochran: they see this it's a beautiful landscape and it's a it's a testament to what
00:24:56.580 --> 00:25:00.340
Christopher Cochran: christian wanted us to get back to the church to the city of Pittsburgh.
00:25:01.400 --> 00:25:05.120
Christopher Cochran: And through the foundation, through the church, the diocese did it only six
00:25:05.120 --> 00:25:06.600
Christopher Cochran: months after Christian's passing.
00:25:06.900 --> 00:25:13.060
Christopher Cochran: So you can imagine for you to get the diocese blessing to take up land that
00:25:13.060 --> 00:25:17.840
Christopher Cochran: they own to put it on the most prominent area of Pittsburgh so everyone can
00:25:17.840 --> 00:25:20.080
Christopher Cochran: visually see this, that was important.
00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:22.720
Christopher Cochran: And the thing is important to know is Christian was a Christian,
00:25:22.920 --> 00:25:25.140
Christopher Cochran: obviously, but he was very spiritual.
00:25:25.400 --> 00:25:30.120
Christopher Cochran: He loved all faiths. He loved all people. He's the most inclusive individual you ever met.
00:25:30.460 --> 00:25:34.940
Christopher Cochran: And so that's what this talks about. It talks about Christian loving all people
00:25:34.940 --> 00:25:37.920
Christopher Cochran: and to bringing them into positivity.
00:25:38.360 --> 00:25:42.640
Christopher Cochran: And we're real proud of that, proud what Christian put together and what he wanted to do.
00:25:42.800 --> 00:25:46.880
Christopher Cochran: We just follow in his mantra and he's always the guiding light there.
00:25:47.860 --> 00:25:55.620
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. In terms of that and following in his mantra, how has it been for you to,
00:25:56.108 --> 00:26:03.508
Kevin Lowe: as a parent, after his passing, to not just want to close up and to not just
00:26:03.508 --> 00:26:07.188
Kevin Lowe: lock away the world and kind of forget about everything else.
00:26:07.588 --> 00:26:12.548
Kevin Lowe: And instead to be very outgoing with this.
00:26:12.728 --> 00:26:17.688
Kevin Lowe: I mean, obviously there's times, many times by yourself, the quiet family,
00:26:17.908 --> 00:26:22.008
Kevin Lowe: but the fact that you've kept going. You've written this book.
00:26:22.288 --> 00:26:26.228
Kevin Lowe: You guys pursued this with this amazing fountain.
00:26:26.688 --> 00:26:28.368
Kevin Lowe: How do you feel like you did that?
00:26:28.888 --> 00:26:32.588
Christopher Cochran: I wouldn't be honest or candid if I didn't tell you that the first year and
00:26:32.588 --> 00:26:37.128
Christopher Cochran: a half, I wasn't a mess, that I wasn't the best that I could be.
00:26:37.288 --> 00:26:40.788
Christopher Cochran: I don't think any of us were. We were in a daze. You're numb.
00:26:41.808 --> 00:26:46.188
Christopher Cochran: Christian's clothes are here in this house, right? His room has not changed
00:26:46.188 --> 00:26:48.508
Christopher Cochran: since he came home from college. His clothes are there.
00:26:48.708 --> 00:26:50.808
Christopher Cochran: His shoes are outside in the garage.
00:26:51.248 --> 00:26:56.368
Christopher Cochran: You know, there's nothing that's changed. On our street, people have green lights in there.
00:26:56.548 --> 00:27:00.768
Christopher Cochran: All the way down the street, there are lanterns that people still have that
00:27:00.768 --> 00:27:06.148
Christopher Cochran: Christian's favorite color was green that you see every night illuminate the streets.
00:27:06.848 --> 00:27:11.028
Christopher Cochran: So I'm always reminded of that. We are, as a family, reminded of that.
00:27:11.228 --> 00:27:14.968
Christopher Cochran: But for the first year to year and a half, I was not a healthy individual.
00:27:15.568 --> 00:27:19.828
Christopher Cochran: And not that I'm a drinker, but I certainly turn to anything that would take
00:27:19.828 --> 00:27:22.208
Christopher Cochran: me away that would allow me to fall asleep.
00:27:22.668 --> 00:27:25.488
Christopher Cochran: But I always remind myself of a quote.
00:27:25.628 --> 00:27:30.808
Christopher Cochran: Bruce Lee used to say a quote and it was powerful for me. It's a simple quote.
00:27:31.328 --> 00:27:37.808
Christopher Cochran: Don't pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.
00:27:38.188 --> 00:27:44.788
Christopher Cochran: And I used to say that to myself all the time because life is not easy. Life, it's tough.
00:27:45.528 --> 00:27:50.168
Christopher Cochran: But I think knowing what I know of Christian you said it earlier which he wants
00:27:50.168 --> 00:27:55.008
Christopher Cochran: us to be happy he wants us to be joyful I think happiness sometimes is an elusive
00:27:55.008 --> 00:27:56.668
Christopher Cochran: state for anybody right I
00:27:57.575 --> 00:28:00.915
Christopher Cochran: I look back and I was extremely happy then. Am I happy today?
00:28:01.655 --> 00:28:07.835
Christopher Cochran: No. I mean, I'm joyful moments. I have moments, pockets of joy that I try to build my heart up.
00:28:07.975 --> 00:28:13.955
Christopher Cochran: But to sit here and say that I'm happy, no, because I still struggle with it.
00:28:14.135 --> 00:28:19.555
Christopher Cochran: I struggle talking about it. I struggle. But I know at the heart of it is Christian.
00:28:20.055 --> 00:28:23.255
Christopher Cochran: And it's him telling me to push.
00:28:23.435 --> 00:28:28.335
Christopher Cochran: He's telling me, you have to be out there to help people. The message is too important.
00:28:28.635 --> 00:28:33.595
Christopher Cochran: That life is so precious. Life is so good. And if we narrow it down to the simplest
00:28:33.595 --> 00:28:36.715
Christopher Cochran: things that in our day, which it is, right?
00:28:36.835 --> 00:28:40.335
Christopher Cochran: You can have bad days, but you can find beauty in those days.
00:28:40.855 --> 00:28:46.195
Christopher Cochran: That's what drives me. That's what drives my family, drives my wife, you know, and my kids.
00:28:46.655 --> 00:28:50.815
Christopher Cochran: And so I don't think there's any other, to your point, which is either,
00:28:51.075 --> 00:28:55.975
Christopher Cochran: and a lot of people statistically break up. marriages break up when things like this happen.
00:28:56.375 --> 00:29:02.715
Christopher Cochran: It's well over 50% that marriages fall apart and families come apart because
00:29:02.715 --> 00:29:05.295
Christopher Cochran: of the grief. It's just so intense.
00:29:06.195 --> 00:29:09.475
Christopher Cochran: But we fought through it to stay loving.
00:29:10.935 --> 00:29:15.255
Christopher Cochran: I know it's such a cliche, you put one foot in front of the other, and it really is.
00:29:15.395 --> 00:29:19.015
Christopher Cochran: You have to just get up and focus on what you can do good today.
00:29:19.535 --> 00:29:24.455
Christopher Cochran: And Christian had this wonderful thing. Christian didn't have to-do list. He had to love list.
00:29:25.075 --> 00:29:31.155
Christopher Cochran: And so I think it's such a powerful thing that when I get up and we get up as
00:29:31.155 --> 00:29:34.515
Christopher Cochran: family, we don't have these to-do lists. Like I gotta get this done.
00:29:34.595 --> 00:29:37.435
Christopher Cochran: I gotta to love somebody. How do I love someone better?
00:29:37.775 --> 00:29:42.795
Christopher Cochran: How do I put more good into this world that's negative in so many ways?
00:29:42.975 --> 00:29:47.075
Christopher Cochran: So I just do what Christian does and follow that. And that's the point of the
00:29:47.075 --> 00:29:48.895
Christopher Cochran: book is that I tried to document those ways.
00:29:49.015 --> 00:29:51.195
Christopher Cochran: That you can do exactly the same thing.
00:29:51.835 --> 00:29:57.375
Kevin Lowe: Wow. Before we dive into the book, because that was honestly my next question,
00:29:57.535 --> 00:30:04.935
Kevin Lowe: but you spoke about the house, about his bedroom, about the shoes in the garage.
00:30:05.415 --> 00:30:10.235
Kevin Lowe: You mentioned earlier that Christian actually passed away at home.
00:30:11.275 --> 00:30:16.455
Kevin Lowe: Typically, we think of somebody being sick like that, maybe being in the hospital.
00:30:16.875 --> 00:30:17.315
Christopher Cochran: Yeah.
00:30:17.655 --> 00:30:20.015
Kevin Lowe: Was that a choice that you guys made?
00:30:20.375 --> 00:30:22.835
Christopher Cochran: It's a great question. You know, that's the first question. I've been a lot
00:30:22.835 --> 00:30:24.155
Christopher Cochran: of podcasts, lots of interviews.
00:30:24.395 --> 00:30:27.535
Christopher Cochran: No one's ever asked me that question. I think it's because they're worried of
00:30:27.535 --> 00:30:29.355
Christopher Cochran: what, you know, how's that going to come out?
00:30:29.595 --> 00:30:32.015
Christopher Cochran: It's a great question. I'm glad you asked it, by the way.
00:30:33.278 --> 00:30:38.558
Christopher Cochran: So it was a choice. It was a choice by Christian. It was a choice by all of us.
00:30:38.758 --> 00:30:45.118
Christopher Cochran: There was no way, no way that Christian was going to pass away in a hospital.
00:30:45.418 --> 00:30:50.338
Christopher Cochran: I didn't want that. He didn't want that. I wanted him surrounded by the love of his pets.
00:30:50.658 --> 00:30:54.238
Christopher Cochran: The home he was raised in where all the joy was.
00:30:54.778 --> 00:30:59.858
Christopher Cochran: That was important that we had that. Now, I will tell you three weeks prior,
00:31:00.178 --> 00:31:06.298
Christopher Cochran: the cancer had spread to his spine and there was a real chance he was going
00:31:06.298 --> 00:31:10.658
Christopher Cochran: to be, you know, paralyzed because the cancer was so aggressive.
00:31:10.658 --> 00:31:12.778
Christopher Cochran: So God bless Christian.
00:31:12.998 --> 00:31:16.378
Christopher Cochran: We talked about this. There was something they could do, a procedure,
00:31:16.878 --> 00:31:23.138
Christopher Cochran: not a very painful type of situation on the spine to allow that not to happen
00:31:23.138 --> 00:31:26.158
Christopher Cochran: so that he could be at home with us.
00:31:27.438 --> 00:31:33.438
Christopher Cochran: And we surrounded him. I'll tell you something that's – and I talk about it,
00:31:33.458 --> 00:31:37.578
Christopher Cochran: so it's not something I'll talk about. but there was a night when we thought
00:31:37.578 --> 00:31:42.118
Christopher Cochran: Christian's breathing had come very slow and we surrounded him.
00:31:42.298 --> 00:31:44.918
Christopher Cochran: And this is a testament to Christian's humor here.
00:31:45.258 --> 00:31:48.738
Christopher Cochran: We surrounded him. It was probably four, three o'clock in the morning.
00:31:48.738 --> 00:31:54.238
Christopher Cochran: I woke up everybody because I slept next to Christian in the living room and his girlfriend did too.
00:31:54.478 --> 00:31:58.378
Christopher Cochran: She had flown in. She stayed with us for well over a month to stay next to him.
00:31:59.058 --> 00:32:03.478
Christopher Cochran: And we surrounded him praying. We had candles, just telling him how much We loved him.
00:32:03.898 --> 00:32:07.118
Christopher Cochran: And at about six o'clock, his eyes open, looked at all of us.
00:32:07.178 --> 00:32:11.878
Christopher Cochran: And he said, we said, Hey, Christian. And he said, he says, did I miss something?
00:32:12.178 --> 00:32:16.778
Christopher Cochran: Did something happen? Like, and he just had this, it was in a way of being funny.
00:32:16.978 --> 00:32:20.598
Christopher Cochran: And we, we laughed and we said, well, Christian, we thought this was it.
00:32:20.638 --> 00:32:24.118
Christopher Cochran: And he's like, we said, we called the priest to come over here and the last rites.
00:32:24.258 --> 00:32:29.798
Christopher Cochran: And Christian said, Oh, you tell him, save, save the trip. I'm okay right now.
00:32:31.118 --> 00:32:33.918
Christopher Cochran: You know he just you know here he is he's
00:32:33.918 --> 00:32:37.518
Christopher Cochran: literally at the final point he says oh tell father
00:32:37.518 --> 00:32:44.298
Christopher Cochran: Tom and father Nick to to save the trip um you know um and and ultimately father
00:32:44.298 --> 00:32:48.978
Christopher Cochran: Nick did come out later on the day but but ultimately to talk to Christian privately
00:32:48.978 --> 00:32:53.998
Christopher Cochran: but but yeah he he made a joke of that situation we all laughed we're around
00:32:53.998 --> 00:32:55.978
Christopher Cochran: him crying but we're laughing.
00:32:56.418 --> 00:33:00.798
Christopher Cochran: And again, he just found a way to make us laugh and cry all at the same time.
00:33:00.938 --> 00:33:03.998
Christopher Cochran: And so one of the doctors said, you know, your son taught us how to live,
00:33:04.118 --> 00:33:07.818
Christopher Cochran: but he also taught us all how to die. And he did. It was a beauty.
00:33:08.078 --> 00:33:11.098
Christopher Cochran: And all that awfulness, there was so much beauty.
00:33:11.578 --> 00:33:14.498
Christopher Cochran: It's hard to explain how beautiful it really was.
00:33:15.378 --> 00:33:21.298
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. Wow. I love what you just said about that. He taught you how to live,
00:33:21.478 --> 00:33:22.838
Kevin Lowe: but he also taught you how to die.
00:33:23.358 --> 00:33:32.558
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. That's what a beautiful summary of this little section of his life. Your book,
00:33:33.279 --> 00:33:40.139
Kevin Lowe: his book, what made you decide to even take on such a, such a task,
00:33:40.339 --> 00:33:45.059
Kevin Lowe: such a, such a responsibility, however you want to view it, but this,
00:33:45.179 --> 00:33:47.219
Kevin Lowe: this project of, of writing a book?
00:33:47.659 --> 00:33:53.959
Christopher Cochran: About a year and a half ago, I got that nudge from Christian to do something.
00:33:53.979 --> 00:33:55.659
Christopher Cochran: I didn't know what that was.
00:33:56.799 --> 00:34:01.699
Christopher Cochran: I knew I had to step up. I had to be a better person, a better parent,
00:34:01.839 --> 00:34:06.159
Christopher Cochran: a better personality, but it had to be something different than this person
00:34:06.159 --> 00:34:07.899
Christopher Cochran: who wanted just to stay in bed all day.
00:34:08.959 --> 00:34:15.819
Christopher Cochran: And I did, I got up, I started to go back. I journaled Christian's life when he got sick.
00:34:16.339 --> 00:34:20.919
Christopher Cochran: So I would, between midnight to four in the mornings, I was always journaling.
00:34:21.059 --> 00:34:23.879
Christopher Cochran: I didn't sleep, not very much, maybe catnaps here and there,
00:34:24.039 --> 00:34:27.879
Christopher Cochran: just to try to catch up. But I would write the journaling.
00:34:28.219 --> 00:34:32.379
Christopher Cochran: And so I had all these journals and I wanted to be able to capture some of those
00:34:32.379 --> 00:34:35.659
Christopher Cochran: journals in a story as part of the book, right?
00:34:35.879 --> 00:34:40.419
Christopher Cochran: And tell the story of how I met my wife and where we come from and what we did
00:34:40.419 --> 00:34:44.139
Christopher Cochran: and how this love story that was built around Christian.
00:34:45.519 --> 00:34:52.259
Christopher Cochran: But yeah, I just started going back in time and it's hard to relive those moments.
00:34:52.279 --> 00:34:54.379
Christopher Cochran: I haven't looked at it since, right?
00:34:54.539 --> 00:34:59.779
Christopher Cochran: I know a lot of it's in the book, but you piece it together because you want
00:34:59.779 --> 00:35:02.579
Christopher Cochran: it to flow well and tell a beautiful story.
00:35:03.079 --> 00:35:06.999
Christopher Cochran: But ultimately, yeah, it was Christian. He continues to drive me.
00:35:07.299 --> 00:35:11.059
Christopher Cochran: During the process, I wanted to stop. I couldn't do it.
00:35:11.839 --> 00:35:17.419
Christopher Cochran: But it was always Christian pushing me to do this and keep moving forward,
00:35:17.619 --> 00:35:19.299
Christopher Cochran: push yourself through difficult things.
00:35:20.099 --> 00:35:24.999
Christopher Cochran: And, um, that's what I did. And, and ultimately the, the book came out late August
00:35:25.739 --> 00:35:30.779
Christopher Cochran: and it's been, uh, I think an incredible success based on the things I hear
00:35:30.779 --> 00:35:34.919
Christopher Cochran: and then, and the reports I get, I think it's special to see that the book is
00:35:34.919 --> 00:35:37.819
Christopher Cochran: selling overseas in different countries.
00:35:37.839 --> 00:35:39.959
Christopher Cochran: And that's a really important thing.
00:35:40.079 --> 00:35:43.059
Christopher Cochran: And because I think it's a message that can spread everywhere.
00:35:43.059 --> 00:35:45.539
Christopher Cochran: It's a simple phrase, right? What's good about today.
00:35:45.919 --> 00:35:49.699
Christopher Cochran: And you can, in, in, if you look at it and ask that question of yourself,
00:35:50.279 --> 00:35:52.659
Christopher Cochran: it can have a big impact. So yeah, Christian drove me.
00:35:53.019 --> 00:35:56.439
Christopher Cochran: He still continues to drive me to do the things I do. To be here with you today,
00:35:56.919 --> 00:36:00.939
Christopher Cochran: it's always Christian driving me, inspires me to do good things and talk.
00:36:01.339 --> 00:36:06.359
Kevin Lowe: Yeah, I love it so much. Is there something in the book that maybe you could
00:36:06.359 --> 00:36:10.319
Kevin Lowe: share, maybe a story that you wrote that maybe you haven't really touched on
00:36:10.319 --> 00:36:16.119
Kevin Lowe: today to give us a little bit deeper insight into exactly the power of this book?
00:36:16.119 --> 00:36:22.359
Christopher Cochran: Yeah, one of the things I talk about, I talk about faith, right, and spirituality.
00:36:23.279 --> 00:36:26.239
Christopher Cochran: And one of the things Christian always does,
00:36:26.761 --> 00:36:34.661
Christopher Cochran: talked about was his connections with Buddhism and Judaism, and of course, the Christian faith.
00:36:34.821 --> 00:36:37.321
Christopher Cochran: But one of the things he also talked about was talism.
00:36:37.581 --> 00:36:40.901
Christopher Cochran: So, you know, talism is about flowing with the river.
00:36:41.201 --> 00:36:46.641
Christopher Cochran: There's a lot of discussion of how talism talks about how we move with the grace
00:36:46.641 --> 00:36:51.061
Christopher Cochran: of water and to let our lives flow like water.
00:36:51.161 --> 00:36:54.341
Christopher Cochran: And Christian believe that don't fight the current.
00:36:54.941 --> 00:37:00.321
Christopher Cochran: Much of us, we fight that current. And there's a whole chapter on Christian's Tao,
00:37:00.561 --> 00:37:05.681
Christopher Cochran: which is to talk about how he didn't fight that river and that he understood
00:37:05.681 --> 00:37:13.241
Christopher Cochran: that life is an easier path when you follow the stream and you flow with how things go in this world,
00:37:13.481 --> 00:37:20.721
Christopher Cochran: that you can lead a better life and you can become closer to your fellow man,
00:37:21.381 --> 00:37:27.121
Christopher Cochran: connect better, and understand your circumstances no matter how dire they can get.
00:37:27.481 --> 00:37:30.581
Christopher Cochran: So I think that's a tidbit. We didn't really talk about that,
00:37:30.581 --> 00:37:35.001
Christopher Cochran: but, you know, I think I tried to capture a lot of what I believed,
00:37:35.001 --> 00:37:36.621
Christopher Cochran: you know, Christian used to
00:37:36.621 --> 00:37:41.321
Christopher Cochran: discuss with us and how he looked at the world that way through his eyes.
00:37:41.621 --> 00:37:44.381
Christopher Cochran: So I think it was an important part of the book.
00:37:44.381 --> 00:37:48.241
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. After publishing this book,
00:37:48.881 --> 00:37:55.041
Kevin Lowe: starting speaking publicly about Christian story, coming on podcasts like this,
00:37:55.241 --> 00:38:03.301
Kevin Lowe: how has it maybe helped you in the whole grieving process?
00:38:04.101 --> 00:38:08.081
Christopher Cochran: Well, I think everybody goes through grief, some form or fashion.
00:38:08.321 --> 00:38:12.641
Christopher Cochran: It's the commonality that we all have in this life that we're all here.
00:38:13.021 --> 00:38:16.781
Christopher Cochran: Someone's going to pass away that's close to us. But I've realized that when
00:38:16.781 --> 00:38:19.521
Christopher Cochran: you get through these things, this is really about two things.
00:38:19.661 --> 00:38:24.621
Christopher Cochran: One is absolutely always show humbleness, humbleness before God,
00:38:24.741 --> 00:38:27.661
Christopher Cochran: humble before everybody, humble in your life.
00:38:28.241 --> 00:38:30.901
Christopher Cochran: And the second thing is to realize you're not in control.
00:38:32.141 --> 00:38:36.901
Christopher Cochran: You think you're in control, but ultimately God is the one who controls how things work.
00:38:37.281 --> 00:38:40.921
Christopher Cochran: And we're just here to make the best of things.
00:38:41.261 --> 00:38:45.321
Christopher Cochran: But I think one of the things that it's taught me is that, you know,
00:38:45.421 --> 00:38:46.921
Christopher Cochran: really there are three things that it's taught me.
00:38:47.021 --> 00:38:50.221
Christopher Cochran: One is the power of perspective, right?
00:38:50.521 --> 00:38:55.961
Christopher Cochran: I believe that every day you got to ask yourself this, what's good about today
00:38:55.961 --> 00:39:00.381
Christopher Cochran: and focus on that because that gives you some perspective. I also think that
00:39:00.381 --> 00:39:03.401
Christopher Cochran: there's something resilience and choice.
00:39:04.481 --> 00:39:08.621
Christopher Cochran: And I think, you know, watching Christian endure these endless treatments,
00:39:08.881 --> 00:39:12.161
Christopher Cochran: therapies, surgeries, I realized something profound.
00:39:13.121 --> 00:39:18.941
Christopher Cochran: Resilience isn't a trait. It's a decision. Right. So resilience isn't a trait. It's a decision.
00:39:19.141 --> 00:39:23.921
Christopher Cochran: And Christian made the decision every single day to be positive and to be funny
00:39:23.921 --> 00:39:26.261
Christopher Cochran: and to face these challenges.
00:39:26.581 --> 00:39:28.921
Christopher Cochran: And then ultimately, it's leave a legacy.
00:39:29.301 --> 00:39:31.081
Christopher Cochran: Legacies are built on small moments.
00:39:31.661 --> 00:39:38.661
Christopher Cochran: Right. And I try to remind that every interaction we have, every small kindness,
00:39:38.841 --> 00:39:41.721
Christopher Cochran: every smile, that's what people remember.
00:39:41.781 --> 00:39:45.701
Christopher Cochran: Because it's easy to get caught up in wanting to achieve big things.
00:39:45.721 --> 00:39:51.561
Christopher Cochran: But the truth is our greatest legacies is built every day in the smallest of moments.
00:39:51.561 --> 00:39:58.321
Christopher Cochran: So when you, you know, narrow it down to small moments and you can make sure
00:39:58.321 --> 00:40:04.681
Christopher Cochran: that you have resilience of your choice and you have a strong power of perspective.
00:40:04.981 --> 00:40:08.021
Christopher Cochran: Those are three things I think you can take away daily.
00:40:08.501 --> 00:40:14.941
Kevin Lowe: Yeah, I love it. Before we continue for somebody hearing us talk about your
00:40:14.941 --> 00:40:19.541
Kevin Lowe: book, where is the best place for people to find your book at?
00:40:19.541 --> 00:40:23.661
Christopher Cochran: So the book is available for global distribution. It can be found online.
00:40:23.821 --> 00:40:26.721
Christopher Cochran: Again, it's What's Good About Today, A Purpose Driven Life.
00:40:26.881 --> 00:40:29.121
Christopher Cochran: You certainly could Google Christian Cochran.
00:40:29.301 --> 00:40:31.881
Christopher Cochran: You'll probably get all kinds of information on Christian.
00:40:32.081 --> 00:40:36.281
Christopher Cochran: And that's the most important thing. There's certainly christiancochran.org.
00:40:36.441 --> 00:40:39.181
Christopher Cochran: That talks about all the things we're doing in Christian's name,
00:40:39.441 --> 00:40:44.001
Christopher Cochran: the foundation, the things he cared about, the stories about Christian,
00:40:44.201 --> 00:40:45.761
Christopher Cochran: certainly pictures about Christian.
00:40:46.701 --> 00:40:50.681
Christopher Cochran: And you can certainly find the book at Amazon.
00:40:51.081 --> 00:40:54.241
Christopher Cochran: So it's on Amazon and you can find Barnes & Noble.
00:40:54.541 --> 00:40:59.481
Christopher Cochran: But I think it's in almost most all, I mean, it's certainly in Christian stores,
00:40:59.501 --> 00:41:01.061
Christopher Cochran: it's in different locations.
00:41:01.081 --> 00:41:05.221
Christopher Cochran: So if you can't get it at Barnes & Noble on site, you can order it from there.
00:41:05.341 --> 00:41:10.941
Christopher Cochran: But online, it's a pretty easy thing. You get it, they make it so easy now to get these books.
00:41:11.221 --> 00:41:13.361
Christopher Cochran: You could order it today. You probably have it by tomorrow.
00:41:14.101 --> 00:41:18.721
Christopher Cochran: So, yeah, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and any retailer that sells books.
00:41:19.401 --> 00:41:24.161
Kevin Lowe: Well, fantastic. Well, I will be positive that all of that is in the show notes
00:41:24.161 --> 00:41:31.081
Kevin Lowe: for anybody interested for making that super easy to access to get a hold of this book.
00:41:31.541 --> 00:41:36.021
Kevin Lowe: Because I think it's, as we've heard it, it's more than a book.
00:41:36.541 --> 00:41:41.801
Kevin Lowe: I mean, it's honestly like a manual for how to live life like Christian.
00:41:42.201 --> 00:41:50.721
Kevin Lowe: And as you talk today, I mean, it's obvious, no doubt, that your son was a one of a kind.
00:41:50.981 --> 00:41:57.121
Kevin Lowe: And you even made mention of it that he lived a lot in his life.
00:41:58.522 --> 00:42:06.442
Kevin Lowe: And it's like, it's like it was all meant to be, you know, it's like sometimes
00:42:06.442 --> 00:42:11.162
Kevin Lowe: there's some people who God knows they're going to leave a massive impact really quick.
00:42:11.162 --> 00:42:14.122
Kevin Lowe: Maybe others, it's going to be a little bit longer time.
00:42:15.842 --> 00:42:23.182
Kevin Lowe: And as much as all of us wish that no one had to leave, the fact of the legacy
00:42:23.182 --> 00:42:28.542
Kevin Lowe: that your son has left on this world is absolutely beautiful.
00:42:29.802 --> 00:42:32.902
Christopher Cochran: Thank you. Thank you, Kevin. Appreciate that.
00:42:33.342 --> 00:42:33.702
Kevin Lowe: Yeah.
00:42:33.842 --> 00:42:38.802
Christopher Cochran: I agree with you. I agree with you. Yeah, I mean, I appreciate saying it is
00:42:38.802 --> 00:42:42.042
Christopher Cochran: a robe. I always refer to it as a roadmap, right?
00:42:42.782 --> 00:42:47.562
Christopher Cochran: It's a roadmap to find purpose. I still continue to use the book as a roadmap.
00:42:47.722 --> 00:42:51.802
Christopher Cochran: At the end of every chapter, it does give examples of how, you know,
00:42:51.922 --> 00:42:56.762
Christopher Cochran: it sort of paraphrases the chapter at the end of every chapter to give people
00:42:56.762 --> 00:43:00.382
Christopher Cochran: useful tools to use in their daily life the way Christian did.
00:43:00.522 --> 00:43:06.262
Christopher Cochran: And so I'm still striving for that. I'm still striving to lead a purposely driven life.
00:43:06.302 --> 00:43:10.122
Christopher Cochran: I think everybody is, right? We're all trying to figure out, why are we here?
00:43:10.282 --> 00:43:13.042
Christopher Cochran: What's next? Why did God put me here?
00:43:13.842 --> 00:43:20.762
Christopher Cochran: Why any of these things? But I think past the why, it's how we interact with
00:43:20.762 --> 00:43:23.062
Christopher Cochran: others, how we go about our daily life.
00:43:23.162 --> 00:43:25.382
Christopher Cochran: And so I think you're right, Christian.
00:43:25.942 --> 00:43:30.922
Christopher Cochran: I have to believe that this was divine, the way God sets this out to be, right?
00:43:31.202 --> 00:43:35.682
Christopher Cochran: I used to say to Christian, even when he was little, I always said this to Christian.
00:43:36.042 --> 00:43:38.362
Christopher Cochran: I mean, when I was a little kid, I would say, when I grew up,
00:43:38.482 --> 00:43:39.782
Christopher Cochran: Krishna, I want to be just like you.
00:43:40.536 --> 00:43:45.796
Christopher Cochran: And, and I said that to him all the time because he just, that's how he,
00:43:45.896 --> 00:43:50.176
Christopher Cochran: he led that, he kept leading this purposely driven life, whether it was traveling,
00:43:50.376 --> 00:43:52.316
Christopher Cochran: connecting, helping those who are struggling.
00:43:52.876 --> 00:43:56.876
Christopher Cochran: I document letters. There are letters from people in the book that,
00:43:56.876 --> 00:44:00.976
Christopher Cochran: that I didn't know about Christian, right? I knew he's a great person.
00:44:01.116 --> 00:44:03.816
Christopher Cochran: I knew he did all these wonders and he was a wonderful human being,
00:44:03.816 --> 00:44:07.416
Christopher Cochran: but people would reach out to me that spent five minutes and how he changed
00:44:07.416 --> 00:44:11.556
Christopher Cochran: their life. or I'd have old friends who are not included in something.
00:44:11.996 --> 00:44:16.756
Christopher Cochran: One in particular story, a girl who was at college, she had sat down at the lunch table.
00:44:16.876 --> 00:44:20.496
Christopher Cochran: Christian was over with his friends. This is in college and she was by herself.
00:44:20.656 --> 00:44:26.556
Christopher Cochran: And Christian had this incredible, I mean, oh, there's not enough words to describe
00:44:26.556 --> 00:44:28.636
Christopher Cochran: it. He understood people's pain.
00:44:29.096 --> 00:44:32.696
Christopher Cochran: He could see it and he would go to it. He didn't run away from it.
00:44:32.916 --> 00:44:35.916
Christopher Cochran: And so if he saw you were in pain, he saw you were isolated.
00:44:36.516 --> 00:44:40.236
Christopher Cochran: She told me the story that Christian came to her and sat with her and introduced himself.
00:44:41.096 --> 00:44:45.836
Christopher Cochran: And she said, I was in the worst place possible. I was in a very bad place.
00:44:45.956 --> 00:44:50.896
Christopher Cochran: And your son brought me so much joy and light. He brought me into his friend group.
00:44:51.236 --> 00:44:55.736
Christopher Cochran: He introduced me at that moment, said that he was one, I was one of them.
00:44:55.936 --> 00:45:00.336
Christopher Cochran: And he would take whatever she needed when she was struggling.
00:45:00.876 --> 00:45:07.596
Christopher Cochran: It's just, it's one of hundreds of stories that I recount in the book and talk about.
00:45:07.916 --> 00:45:13.556
Christopher Cochran: I think it brings me peace to know that Christian was doing all the right things
00:45:13.556 --> 00:45:18.276
Christopher Cochran: in this life to get him to where he wanted to go in the next life, ultimately.
00:45:19.276 --> 00:45:26.856
Kevin Lowe: Yeah. To close out our conversation today, there's so much that your son has
00:45:26.856 --> 00:45:30.376
Kevin Lowe: taught us about living, about dying.
00:45:30.916 --> 00:45:36.396
Kevin Lowe: But if you had to just leave us with one thing, what is that one thing that
00:45:36.396 --> 00:45:40.856
Kevin Lowe: you want every person listening today to remember about your son?
00:45:41.616 --> 00:45:46.716
Christopher Cochran: Life will hand us challenges. It will bring us to our knees.
00:45:47.056 --> 00:45:53.656
Christopher Cochran: And sometimes we won't know how to move forward. But there's one thing Christian taught me. It's this.
00:45:53.876 --> 00:45:57.476
Christopher Cochran: There's always something good about today. It It might be small,
00:45:57.676 --> 00:46:00.316
Christopher Cochran: it might be hidden, but it's there.
00:46:01.016 --> 00:46:05.196
Christopher Cochran: When we choose to focus on that, when we embrace resilience,
00:46:05.516 --> 00:46:09.996
Christopher Cochran: when we commit to creating a legacy built on love, kindness, and courage,
00:46:10.829 --> 00:46:17.309
Christopher Cochran: We don't just survive, we thrive. So I would leave everyone with that and hope
00:46:17.309 --> 00:46:21.669
Christopher Cochran: that people wake up, whether it's in the morning, it's in the afternoon,
00:46:21.709 --> 00:46:23.169
Christopher Cochran: or it's before you go to bed,
00:46:23.409 --> 00:46:27.289
Christopher Cochran: is to remind yourself what's good about today.
00:46:27.429 --> 00:46:33.349
Christopher Cochran: Because I really, really believe it can help guide anyone moving forward.
00:46:34.069 --> 00:46:40.129
Kevin Lowe: Absolutely. Christopher, thank you, man, from the bottom of my heart for,
00:46:40.129 --> 00:46:45.909
Kevin Lowe: for being here, for, for sharing the story about your family,
00:46:46.329 --> 00:46:50.629
Kevin Lowe: about your son, with me, with my audience. It means the world to me.
00:46:50.909 --> 00:46:53.289
Kevin Lowe: And I can't say thank you enough.
00:46:53.509 --> 00:46:58.869
Christopher Cochran: Well, thank you, Kevin. I want to thank you. You've shared your story and it
00:46:58.869 --> 00:47:03.089
Christopher Cochran: always brings me so much joyfulness to my heart.
00:47:03.249 --> 00:47:07.509
Christopher Cochran: When I hear your story, how you've strong resilience, how you lead your life.
00:47:07.829 --> 00:47:11.329
Christopher Cochran: I love when you speak, you are filled with so much happiness.
00:47:11.549 --> 00:47:14.949
Christopher Cochran: You have it. You just got, you've got that thing, Kevin. That's the thing.
00:47:15.089 --> 00:47:16.809
Christopher Cochran: You and Christian have this thing.
00:47:17.209 --> 00:47:20.769
Christopher Cochran: Not many people have it. I don't have it. That's the thing.
00:47:21.149 --> 00:47:27.329
Christopher Cochran: But you have it. And it's a way to bring absolute smiles to someone's face.
00:47:27.449 --> 00:47:29.029
Christopher Cochran: And so I want to thank you.
00:47:29.329 --> 00:47:32.629
Christopher Cochran: Thank you for the opportunity to get to meet you. I know it was divine intervention
00:47:32.629 --> 00:47:34.289
Christopher Cochran: that Christian brought us together for sure.
00:47:35.069 --> 00:47:39.069
Kevin Lowe: Absolutely. Well, thank you. That truly means the world to me.
00:47:39.609 --> 00:47:45.269
Kevin Lowe: And for you listening today, of course, I don't know if you clicked on today's
00:47:45.269 --> 00:47:47.569
Kevin Lowe: episode expecting to hear what you heard today.
00:47:47.909 --> 00:47:53.309
Kevin Lowe: It was a story combined with lessons about living, about dying.
00:47:53.669 --> 00:47:57.069
Kevin Lowe: A story about a father, about a son, about a family.
00:47:57.469 --> 00:48:03.309
Kevin Lowe: But more than anything else, I think it's a story that turns to you and asks
00:48:03.309 --> 00:48:09.369
Kevin Lowe: you one important question. today, tomorrow, and every day, what's good about today?
00:48:09.520 --> 00:48:30.000
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