Welcome to the Borealis experience. I'm your host

Aurora, and I'm very happy to be spending some time with you

today. This episode is, of course, not only for men, it is

for women as well, I just title it that way. Because I feel a

lot of the times, it is more. Yeah, for both genders that I

speak to. And sometimes it's more for women, sometimes more

for guys, and I just like to label it only for men. Today I

want to talk about feeling replaced feeling cheated on. And

comparing yourself to others. I observed in my past that guys

who went through intense breakups escaped into intense

physical activities to help forget, but not also not only to

help forget, but to feel good again, because they imagined the

new partner have their ex girlfriend to be awesomely

wrecked, and maybe recognize that they were a little lazy

towards the end, and not maybe focusing on their physical

appearance as much. Now, when the breakup is through, you run

to the gym and want to be the most ripped person ever. Maybe

not only to make your girlfriend ex girlfriend jealous, but to

kind of feel in power again, because a breakup when it comes

out of nowhere, I can make you feel extremely powerless at

times. And it's scary, and is very, very uncomfortable. But

what can we do? If we go through those feelings of feeling

replaced and rejected and misunderstood? What is the next

step we can do? Of course it is getting over all this and

finding yourself again. But then most importantly, I feel is to

find out how you can really attract the right match for the

next round. Because she didn't cheat on you. Because you're not

lovable. Because you're a bad person. I'm sure she cheated on

you, because you guys were not the perfect match to begin with.

And it has nothing really to do with you and all to do with her

and how she communicates and decides to act in this world.

And you can just focus on yourself now and make sure that

next time around, you are maybe a little more transparent, a

little more open. And you don't have to be like become a

workaholic, or extremist about your hobbies. But I think it is

very important that the people out there who you will encounter

in the future, can truly see who you are, that you create

something for yourself and for others, where people can truly

feel your intentions and your energy and what you are all

about. Because as soon as we do that, people who have ill

intentions people who are not a good match will not even be able

to come close to you. It is only the people that will help you

get there help you achieve your goals and supporting others. I

lost my train of thought but only those people will be able

to come close to you and touch your heart really. And the

relationship that you just came out of or that you're still

grieving was not the right relationship for you to begin

with. Otherwise you would have worked things out and it is

okay. Some people come and go and some People stay, and are

meant to be in our lives. So if you feel replaced, I hope that

you know that a motivation for a girl to pick a totally different

type of guy than you. Most of the time has nothing to do with

you. But with her, with her experiences, with her

insecurities. With her daddy issues, we can call them, you

know, with the masculine role model that she had in front of

her when she was growing up, and not so much has to do with you,

while my English is really shitty today. But I'm just gonna

keep talking. And I beg you to forgive me, I'm not in a very

crisp place today. But I really wanted to talk about this topic.

So the most important thing is get back to who you were and who

you are, and find something that truly inspires you, that truly

brings you joy, and that you can be passionate about. And it

doesn't have to be a job. And it doesn't have to be only that

hobby now and your life taking everything over. Don't be

extreme with it and keep your balance. But find something

where you can excel and really be shining. And you will only

attract people that match your vibration. I feel we all can

feel responsible for the partner choices that we made in the

past. And maybe if you look back, you could see that you

were a little bit, dimming your light and maybe shy, which is

not a bad thing, but not fully expressing yourself, share

sharing your thoughts and your feelings. And in not doing all

these things, you attracted someone who saw something else

and you and now she's with that other person not because that

other person is better, but maybe she can match better, and

she can see better what that person is about. And with you,

it was maybe a guessing game, or it was only after a few months

or years that she found out that it's not really the right match.

So if we can be transparent from the get go, you can only see how

good it is for yourself. It is a brave and courageous thing to

do. But in the end, you will get less hurt and less disappointed

with people because they know exactly what they are seeing in

front of them. And you know exactly what you're expressing

and showing and it is authentic and raw and genuine. So, I

really hope you're not going through a heartbreak right now

because I would hate to be so far and just reachable over this

podcast. But maybe you're still grieving over a relationship

that is a long, long time ago. And then I want you to think

about this a little bit what I just said here and make you feel

okay, more okay about it than you might be feeling already.

So, take good care of yourself, and maybe take a couple of

minutes now and really think about what is truly good for you

and brings your joy without being an escape into physicality

and intellectuality. I don't even know if that word exists,

but you know what I mean? And, yeah, Spy yourself to some

really positive, good alone time. And then use COVID Corona

confinement here to dream about a new hobby, a new project, you

want to attack, a new job that you want to excel and I care so

much about you. And we'll be out there for you tomorrow again.

Thank you so lunch for listening you guys and girls, warriors and

goddesses. I'm Aurora with the Borealis experience