[00:00:00] Celestine Pressley: I would say be open. Check your ego at the door.

[00:00:03] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:00:03] Celestine Pressley: And just be open to change. You know, how bad do you want it? And if you really want to achieve those goals that seem unattainable, that really are attainable you know, do the work.

[00:00:15] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:00:15] Celestine Pressley: take the time make the sacrifice and be consistent with And it, you know, you will start to see immediately how you're feeling.

[00:00:24] Like I said, I, when I went through those forgiveness exercises, I would feel lighter. It was like literally something was lifted that I didn't even know was weighing me down. And so , all of that. Everything that you, and you mentioned, you always talk about the recipe. It's all interrelated and connected, and it all works together well.

[00:00:43] So if you don't do the forgiveness and you're still weighted down, it's like saying an affirmation, you know, trying to grab onto a balloon, but you got, you know, two tons of. weight keeping you on the ground, you know, you gotta cut that weight so you can, when you're saying these affirmations and trying to lift in this, this balloon, you can, you can fly away.

[00:01:03] So you gotta cut that weight, those weights from the past, and you gotta acknowledge that they're there,

[00:01:08] Narrator: Welcome to Why She's Winning with your host, Christy Rutherford, a master of office politics and self-care advocacy. Christie's clients have received over 10 million in salary raises in a pandemic, surprised that women are still getting paid during these challenging times. It's possible for you too.

[00:01:28] You can have it all. If you believe you deserve it, Christie and her guest will assist you with that. Let's get started.

[00:01:36] Christy Rutherford: Welcome everyone to Why She's Winning. I am your host Christy Rutherford. Today. I have the phenomenal, amazingly brilliant, talented, gorgeous, beautiful, bougie Celestine Pressley joining us today. Why am I all out? Why am I screaming so much?

[00:01:55] Celestine Pressley: Hi Christy. Cause that's your way. That's what you do. It's effective. It works.

[00:02:02] Christy Rutherford: I got real loud. I haven't had my coffee yet. Okay. Anyway, back to it. All right, so let's talk about Celestine right quick. Celestine is the Chief Information Officer at the White House office of the United States Trade representative U S T R. She is an accomplished IT executive who has LED enterprise information management systems for over 20 years using iterative, using big words software development lifecycle techniques, and agile development methods.

[00:02:40] Okay, you got a lot. Celestine is also a certified federal executive Coach. Coaches have coaches. If your coach don't have a coach, you got the wrong coach. I told Celestine. If your coach don't have a coach, you got a couch. You got somebody who know everything.

[00:02:55] Celestine Pressley: That's right.

[00:02:55] Christy Rutherford: Okay. She uses her coaching skills to help individuals reach their professional goals.

[00:03:00] Her goal is to help every client reach their full potential and live a fulfilling life. She has her Bachelor of Science in Computer Science from South Carolina State University, right in Orangeburg, South Carolina. She got her MBA from Winthrop University. As well as an M D I V from Howard. What is that? M D I V

[00:03:23] Celestine Pressley: Masters of Divinity.

[00:03:25] Christy Rutherford: Oh, okay. Alright. Praise the Lord from Howard. And she enjoys movies, reading, spending time with her family and friends. She has a son, Joshua Aiden Pressley. Welcome Celestine.

[00:03:37] Celestine Pressley: Thank you. What an introduction. Thank you so much for having me.

[00:03:41] Christy Rutherford: If I'd have read the rest of it, we'll still be here.

[00:03:43] Celestine Pressley: No.

[00:03:45] Christy Rutherford: We'll be here all day. So. Alright, so, Celestine, we're talking about how to find your freedom and flow. Right? And I love to tell women you don't have to fight to get to the next level, we need to stop fighting and learn how to flow. So that's what we're going to be talking about today. So what was going on Celestine when you was like, you know what, I need to do something different.

[00:04:11] Celestine Pressley: Honestly, it was my health. And I don't even think I ever shared that part with you. Back in 2021, 2020, you know, I have my annual doctor's appointments and, you know, my health numbers were fine. And you know, admittedly, you know, where I work is pretty stressful, high pressure. I'm in IT.

[00:04:30] So obviously with covid that added additional layer. I'm in IT at the White House on a global scale that added additional layer. And so by the fall of 2021, when it was time to get my annual, my primary care physician was raising all these alarm bells. Like literally in a year my numbers went south. And so I was like, I need to make a change. I need to get out of DC. I'm Southern. I love, you know, I do love the south. I love everything about the culture and things like that. I've been here for 20 some odd years. I can check that box. This is my third administration. I can check that box. Let me go and try to do something different, but I didn't know how to make that leap.

[00:05:13] And the stress of just being in this area for so long had taken its toll. And so, I knew something needed to be tweaked. I just didn't know what and so just so happens we're fellow bulldogs. You were on the Bulldog Entrepreneur you were highlighted, and I said, Hmm, let me call her and see what she's talking about.

[00:05:38] And so when I called you what she were saying resonated with me and I was very curious and I always loved to support bulldogs, women who look like me. And so that's how we got to hear. And it's been transformational. And so that's started the journey, and so it was really easy for me to pick up and latch onto the things that you were saying because I have my MDiv, because I have a strong faith base.

[00:06:01] It's all interrelated and connected. You just reminded me of things that I already knew. It's just you get so mired in the muck of stressors in the world that I, I'm not gonna say I've forgotten, but I was just, it was just too much. Not almost like not seeing the forest for the trees.

[00:06:20] Christy Rutherford: You know, usually when I talk to women, I typically say something very offensive.

[00:06:24] Right. To wake them up to, I didn't do that to you, I don't think.

[00:06:27] Celestine Pressley: Yes, you did. Yes you did. . Yes you did.

[00:06:31] Christy Rutherford: Ok. Go ahead. What did I say?

[00:06:32] Celestine Pressley: You said, I was like she said, you listened to me and you said you have checked off all the boxes, but you're still unhappy. You're like an old piece of furniture that just needs to be dusted off.

[00:06:45] So I was an old piece of furniture.

[00:06:52] That's what you said. And I wasn't offended. I was just like, okay. I, I, you know, I wasn't like, it wasn't fighting words, it was just like, no one's ever said that to me, but okay. I'm am old piece of furniture. I'm like, and it wasn't like an antique piece of furniture that people, you know, cherish. It was like, you know, that old chair that's been worn, you know what I mean?

[00:07:21] Christy Rutherford: My bad, I gotta start writing down what I say to y'all. Cause, cause it's a conscious interrupt, right? Like, all I wanna do is get you to be like, I really wanna start a mental argument when you're headed to be like, is it true? Because here's the thing, and I remember now if I called you a, the, the, the old piece of furniture.

[00:07:42] It's, it's like those, and I don't know if they still show 'em, I watch TV no more, but like when the layers of life have covered you up, like people take a beautiful piece of wood, you know, like take a dresser and then they paint it green because in the seventies, you know, that was that color, that olive green color.

[00:07:57] Yeah, the color. And then, and then somebody comes and they say, no, I want it to be orange. Because now we're in the, you know, people smoking weed days and they want like an orange dresser and then somebody comes and they're like, no, I want it to be more classic. And I paint it black and then I paint. So life and just experiences has started to cover up what was already there.

[00:08:15] So what I was saying was we need to be able to remove all the layers to reveal who's standing there. Like you already are the person who deserves everything that you want. You can't figure out how to get to it because of what life has done to you because of the challenges. And here's the thing, Celestine, women like to pretend, which is insane to me. We ain't never been through nothing. Everybody's been through something.

[00:08:40] Celestine Pressley: Yes. . Yes. Oh my goodness. And at this stage in my life, I'm really willing and open to talk about it.

[00:08:49] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

[00:08:50] Celestine Pressley: One of the things that's I would say might be a possible negative is coming from the South, everybody likes to put sugar over you know what. And nobody likes to, you know, pull back that wound and talk about it. And I'm at the stage in my life, you know, this is where, this is what it is, this is what happened, let's deal with it. And so I wanna talk about it more. I want to help people to understand my journey so that hopefully they can make better decisions for themselves as they go through their journey.

[00:09:17] And so it just so happens I'm getting all of these, you know, opportunities to talk, talk about my journey, talk about my life professionally and otherwise to have that platform to help someone else. And that's where really where I am in life.

[00:09:33] Christy Rutherford: The, the scripture says when thou are converted, strengthen our brethen.

[00:09:36] Celestine Pressley: Yes.

[00:09:37] Christy Rutherford: Right when that word converted, strengthen that sisteren.

[00:09:39] Celestine Pressley: Yes.

[00:09:40] Christy Rutherford: When, when you're converted into peace, you now know the pathway to peace. When you're converted in from, you know, not having good health into wholeness, now you can actually turn back around and actually that's God's design.

[00:09:51] Once you overcome something. . And once you let it go and understand that was a part of your past, but now you can create a passion amongst that and then monetize it if you choose now, that's, that is a mantle that you have to choose to pick up. Everybody ain't gonna do it. You know what I'm saying? So and, and a, a better coach is just a woman or either, you know, whoever who has just chosen to become better. That's what makes you better, not necessarily a certification. So what was most surprising to you Celestine when you started doing the work? What was like that you know, oh my God, I can't believe I'm, I'm like this, or, or I can't believe this has happened to me.

[00:10:30] Celestine Pressley: Well, the forgiveness exercise was really hard for me. And you and Monique actually, you know, deemed me because it took me so long to do it. But honestly, I had to do of all of them, I had to do the forgiveness to God at like two or three times and I cried my way through each time and that was very healing, but also very telling how upset I was with God because of different things that had happened that I just did not expect.

[00:10:59] And it's almost like bad theology on my part because even though you say you're not being transactional with God, the fact that I was angry with him because of things that had happened meant that I was expecting stuff based on what I had done. And that's not the way it works.

[00:11:17] Christy Rutherford: We gonna have to unpack that. We had church on Friday at noon. Cause you got a master's in divinity.

[00:11:24] Celestine Pressley: Yes, I do.

[00:11:25] Christy Rutherford: God And you mad .

[00:11:28] Celestine Pressley: Yeah. I mean, you know, I, I, yeah. At this.

[00:11:33] Christy Rutherford: Oh shit. My. Bad.

[00:11:35] Celestine Pressley: You got it.

[00:11:36] Christy Rutherford: Okay. My bad. My aunt is watching. Okay.

[00:11:37] Celestine Pressley: At that point, yeah, I realized that I was angry with God for some of the things that had transpired in my life.

[00:11:43] , you know, based on my lifestyle and the choices that I've made up until that point you know, nobody's perfect. Obviously I made a lot of mistakes but I just really, really felt like I've been almost, it was like a bill of goods and, and some of it is bad teaching that you sit up under. Some of it is bad expectations, you know, just unrealistic expectations.

[00:12:02] And being in some sort of a bubble that's not really a realistic realistic bubble. So, and that's just me h hindsight obviously. But yeah, when I went through that exercise with God, that was, that was rough.

[00:12:19] Christy Rutherford: So can we unpack a little bit more, because we gonna set somes

[00:12:24] Celestine Pressley: yes. No. Yes, please.

[00:12:25] Christy Rutherford: I did, I did send her a list of questions. I tell everybody I sent y'all questions cuz y'all asked for 'em. I ain't gonna ask you but the first one.

[00:12:31] Were you ready? Were you ready?

[00:12:33] Celestine Pressley: No, but please ask me the please unpack

[00:12:37] Christy Rutherford: Okay, great. So whew.

[00:12:40] I mean, you talked about the bill of goods, right? And here's the thing, religion restricts and controls and condemns and, and demonizes, you know, and, and there's a difference between religion and relationship.

[00:12:51] Celestine Pressley: Yes.

[00:12:52] Christy Rutherford: You know, so you, you suffered because of religion and then you set yourself free through relationship.

[00:13:00] Celestine Pressley: Yes. Yes, I would agree with that. I think that you know, you're given a formula and so since I'm, I'm, you know, very structured anyway, I followed the formula to the T and I was like, well wait a minute. , well hold up. This didn't work out this way for me. And then, you know, I went through a , you know, a a season where I would hear pastors preach.

[00:13:22] They would give the formula and then I'd be mad at them cuz I was like, no, that, that ain't mm-hmm. . .

[00:13:30] That ain't, that did not work for me.

[00:13:32] Christy Rutherford: That ain't it!

[00:13:33] Celestine Pressley: Nope, that ain't it. But it was a, it was a weird place to be because then where do you go? You know? And you know, this is what I'm being taught. This is the formula, this is the whatever you know, spin around three times or whatever it is.

[00:13:46] And this did not work for me. So now what? You know? So, so I kept, I kept praying and anybody who knows me who's watching, who knows me, might not even known that I've been, I was inwardly dealing with all of this because I am such a giver. I am such an intersister. I am such an encourager and *Inaudible*. Because, you know, and I don't wanna give the bad, wrong impression God has blessed me tremendously.

[00:14:10] There's just some outstanding things that I've been praying about for years that are still outstanding. And so that's where we are. And so that's, that's my, you know, and maybe everybody has a thorn in their side. I don't know. I just, I can only speak for myself.

[00:14:28] Christy Rutherford: Ooh, that's good. We ain't, we ain't gonna dig down there too. You be like, Lord, here's my list. Things do for me. You only checked off one . I got 20. So you go around on the alter, put oil on your head, dials in the ashes, pay your tithes, pay your 20%. Pray every night you be like, Lord, I got my Christmas shopping list.

[00:14:57] Why you ain't? I'm just playing

[00:14:59] Celestine Pressley: because, well, I mean, and then on top of that, and then on top of that, encouraging other people who have been blessed using that formula. And so then there's that other dynamic of, am I doing something wrong? Is there something wrong with. You know, all of those other layers.

[00:15:15] And then the reality is it's not that simple. It's, it's more complicated. There's other things. There's how you were raised, there's just so many different factors that play in part to your journey and your process that's not discussed.

[00:15:28] Christy Rutherford: Mm. One size does not fit all.

[00:15:32] Celestine Pressley: There you go.

[00:15:33] Christy Rutherford: One size don't fit off, like, and, the, the thing about even people who preach, they're only giving it from their perspective and their experiences. That don't mean that is true for you, right? So we have to be very careful about what we say and, and what truth is. Because truth is derived from your inner being and how you want to feel.

[00:15:56] Nobody else can do that for you. My truth is not Celestine's truth. Right? So we can standing here and, and, and chest bump each other all. On what's true for us. But what's true for us is based on our experiences, our background, our expectations, how we were raised, you know, what our foundational beliefs and our values are from our family.

[00:16:16] And so we'll go back and forth on what is true and it's not true.

[00:16:21] Celestine Pressley: Exactly. That's it. That's it. That's, that's the key. And so, you know, I make a joke. I was talking to one of my friends and she said, you might be sued. Cause I know so many different situations of women who, you know, in terms of, you know, I'll just say relationships as an example.

[00:16:37] You know, the person that decorated their nursery and had no relationship, you know, a baby's nursery, you know, is it faith or is it fantasy? You know what I mean? And so I was like, you know, just trying to, I need to help these women. You know what I mean? It's just like, what is, what's, there's a, there's, there's a disconnect.

[00:16:58] And so that bothers me. And it's like, how, how do you bridge that, but that, so at any rate, we could go on and on about that.

[00:17:06] Christy Rutherford: Well, we'll, we, I mean, let's, let's stay on it.

[00:17:10] Celestine Pressley: Okay

[00:17:10] Christy Rutherford: I'm gonna pop off of it, but let's stay on it, right? Because, you know, that's why I love these interviews. I'll be like, I'm gonna ask y'all the first question after that.

[00:17:16] I'm gonna dig into what you talk about because it's more interesting than this, you know, these, these canned questions. But here's the thing about. and whoever's on here and is listening to it are the women who need to be out here and listen to it. For me, it's not necessarily about, oh, I need 20,000 views or 200,000 views.

[00:17:31] If we reach one person, cool, great. The one woman that's supposed to reach this to be able to, to change, because, you know, I like to unpack religion. It is completely, completely different than relationship and spirituality and some people condemn spirituality, but it's, it's, there's a difference between being free and then free, free, free from self because now you've resolved the relationship that you have with God and you ain't the only person who got beef for God. Like I was talking to somebody the other day who was like, done,

[00:18:06] checked out. Yeah, I think, I think the, I think they're interrelated and connected and the way that, you know Spirituality is faith-based.

[00:18:16] I think it's faith-based without all of everybody's interpretation of it, and so that's the key. People are limited by what they know and what they're taught and not allowing God to be God in each individual life. And when you do that and remove those constraints of what your limited thinking and mind can, can conceive, then you allow that person to be all of that they're called to be in the, in the confines of spirituality and, and faith in relationship.

[00:18:47] (CHRISTY) Spirituality is now understanding is going back to truth. We know how we want to feel. We know when we're around someone who doesn't make us feel good. We know when we're around people who make us feel good. We know when somebody says something to us is not in agreement with how, what's true and how we want to feel about ourselves.

[00:19:10] But as women, we're taught to suppress how we want to feel and make other people feel good with us, we're taught to not, necessarily, you know do what makes us feel good. We're taught to do what we think will make others feel good, and God will repay us. i.e. Now you're planting a bad seed, respect, expecting to harvest.

[00:19:33] You can only reap what you're planting. And if you're planting bad seed because you got a attitude while you're doing something out of service, and, and now you're a hostage, you're not going to reap a good harvest because you're serving not with the spirit of gratitude. You're serving with the, with the spirit of, you know, being a hostage, you're gonna keep reaping that and you're gonna create, keep creating the same loop again and again and again.

[00:19:58] So when you talk about spirituality, it's what's true for your spirit. Your inner being knows how you want to feel. And so you took all of this information, right, and you got all these recipe cards. You shuffling them and you, and you're matching, you're trying to match your blueprint

[00:20:18] Celestine Pressley: Yep.

[00:20:18] Christy Rutherford: To what people told you was gonna work.

[00:20:20] And you're building your house on sand, we preaching today, Celestine, they better get ready. You're now building your house on saying, because it ain't your house.

[00:20:30] Celestine Pressley: Exactly.

[00:20:30] Christy Rutherford: You, you trying to use the blueprint of what worked and probably didn't necessarily work for other people. But you know what you want. So tell us.

[00:20:39] So let's move into what happened after. or I would say, I, I wanna, before we go to that, what was the forgiveness of God? What did that look like? If you had to do it three times? Like what, what, what was that process?

[00:20:52] Celestine Pressley: You know, well, you know, the process of, you know, the way the, the book and it's the tapping and all that.

[00:20:57] And so then after I finished, I assessed myself. They said, if you're, if you're not a at a 10, then you need to do it again. I said, okay, well, I ain't at 10. So let me go back and do this forgiveness exercise again. And then when I was done, I was still, you know, and then I got to the point you assessed yourself, if you're not at a 10 , you gotta do it again.

[00:21:18] So I kept going over and reading the things that I was. You know, some of those, you know, some of those statements that I had to read aloud for feeling like, you know, I abandon, you know, I was abandoned or you didn't answer the, this prayer, or you know, I didn't feel loved. I didn't feel, you know you know, I, I wasn't worthy or whatever those words that I had written, those sentences in the, in the exercise. I just kept doing it until I got to a zero. And then once I did, I felt so much peace. I felt lighter. But I was like, drained. I was like, whew, this was a lot. So then it took me like another week before I did the next one. Cause I was like, I need to sit.

[00:21:55] Cuz I very, you know, I took the exercises seriously and I didn't wanna zip through them because I really wanted to, I wanted change. And I wanted to be able to get 'em stuck and move forward. So I really took those exercises seriously, and that's why I think it took me so long because I, I just needed to, especially after that gap, I just needed to sit, you know, and just process what had just happened and really understand.

[00:22:21] And it's a weird revelation that I was, because I was so angry about what had not happened. I was kind of holding my own self back, really holding myself back out of anger that I didn't even know I had. So.

[00:22:36] Christy Rutherford: Let me try to share this screen right quick. I'm about to do something that I ain't did before.

[00:22:40] Let's see, share screen. Screen sharing is the easiest with two monitors. Okay, we gonna let that go. I blank off and everything. We're gonna lose everything I wanted to show, I wanna show you before and after picture.

[00:22:53] Celestine Pressley: Oh, okay.

[00:22:53] Christy Rutherford: Is that, is that after picture what had happened?

[00:22:56] Celestine Pressley: Yes.

[00:22:56] Christy Rutherford: Is that after you got free?

[00:22:57] I'm put it on my phone. I'm gonna put it on my phone. So we're gonna move on. So what was most surprising to you? You know, when you're in this group of women, because a lot of, you know, women ask me to do one-onone and I'm like, I ain't doing 1 on 1. Not when the group is so effective. What was most surprising to you about the work?

[00:23:13] You know, when you started, when you were around these other women?

[00:23:17] Celestine Pressley: Commonalities, common themes, even though people were from totally different walks of life, different races, different hues.

[00:23:23] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:23:24] Celestine Pressley: whatever. The struggles were kind of the same.

[00:23:26] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:23:27] Celestine Pressley: self-acceptance, self-love you know, really empathizing with those who were, were struggling.

[00:23:34] You know, you guys were doing W W F with a few of us, and just empathizing, like wanting to give them a hug virtually. But you know, all of those different and just opening your mind, you know, a lot of times we are in our circles with people who look like us, who think like us. There's really no growth there.

[00:23:54] But when you are thrown into a mix of people from different walks of life and different journeys, but all kind of have resonating themes, it helps to expand who you are as well.

[00:24:08] Christy Rutherford: Yeah, that's good because we superwomen cuz I mean, you know, we, we read your bio, we only read the short bio and I had to abbreviate the short bio.

[00:24:17] I promise y'all we'll still be here all day, right? Like, I always say, where were superwomen, come to rest because we tired and can't tell nobody that we tired.

[00:24:27] Listen here, here's your before and after. Oh, hold on. I'm trying to get my, y'all see that? Look at that shine. I mean, hello. Just trying to show that Celestine.

[00:24:41] Do you see yourself? That's you.

[00:24:43] Celestine Pressley: I do. I do.

[00:24:44] Christy Rutherford: Few months. That's what forgiveness looks like. That's what forgiveness looks like. Mm. Okay. we're all suffering and going through something. I think the, the worst thing that we do to ourselves as high-achieving women is to walk around and be perfect and, and, and suffocating our success.

[00:25:03] You know, I think the worst thing that we do is we... is that we condemn ourselves so much and we're so miserable and we can't tell anybody. And, and that's not fair because we have it all. We've checked the boxes and now you're looking at God talking about, yeah, now I gotta bill the lady that you ain't, gimme 20 more things.

[00:25:22] But I done checked the 20 things, or I the 2000 things that you told me to be and you told me to do, but that wasn't true for you. So what happened, Celestine, after, you know, when you found your flow, like what, what had happened?

[00:25:37] Celestine Pressley: I started really assessing what was important for me and what I wanted to do, what resonated with who I had become as a person, and really being focused on finding, you know, opportunities that allowed me to exercise. Walk in that. So for, you know once I started this process all of these job opportunities started coming at me from different, different types of job, different industries.

[00:26:02] I mean, I was overwhelmed. I think I had like 12 or 13 at one point. And one in particular was this really elite private school in DC. Really elite. To the point where I was like, listen, my child can go to school for free at this elite private school. I could just stay up here and move over there. But that's not what I wanted to do.

[00:26:22] I wanted to move back down south, so I had to, and I, I brought that as, as an example. To, to myself to say I needed to remain focused and true to what I really wanted to be and where I wanted to be and be consistent and persistent because had I followed through with that, I could have easily been up here another 10, 15, 20 years cuz it's through, through high school.

[00:26:46] But that's not where I wanted to be. That wasn't aligned with where I, where I am in life. And so it was so I've used that as an example to just speak up, speak to intentionality and just really being strategic and intentional about the opportunities that I entertained.

[00:27:06] Christy Rutherford: I can't remember if it was you or if it was somebody else. We was like, slow down. God, you, you sitting too much at the same time.

[00:27:13] Celestine Pressley: Well, I, you, you gave me a great tip. I remember, I did, I don't know if I said those exact words, but you were like, you need to create a spreadsheet, and the column should be based on what you wanna do.

[00:27:23] Christy Rutherford: Yeah.

[00:27:24] Celestine Pressley: And and the salary and the compensation and that'll help you narrow it down. And that was huge cuz I was, I literally was overwhelmed. I was just like, you know, it was almost like country mouse, we always joke about the country mouse going into the city. And they're like, oh my gosh, really?

[00:27:39] And that's how I was for a while. And then I was like, wait, wait a minute, which one do I focus on? And so that one tip really helped me to narrow my focus so that I can remain intentional and really figure out what, what at this phase in my life, what's most important and what's gonna get me there. So that was very helpful.

[00:28:01] And it allowed me to turn down jobs like that. And people are looking, when I, when I say yeah, I, I decided, I told 'em I didn't wanna go to the next phase. And they were like, you did. And I was like, yeah this, this is where I'm going and I'm staying focused to that. Staying true to that.

[00:28:14] Christy Rutherford: But because what happened, what had happened was you found what was true for you.

[00:28:19] Celestine Pressley: Yeah.

[00:28:19] Christy Rutherford: You put down the map and, and, and the recipe cards. that other people told you would make you happy, which is what got you in the bind with God cuz you following everybody else's recipe when he gave you what was true for you and what was going to make you happy and what was going to make you make you be prosperous and abundant and open up generational wealth for your family.

[00:28:44] Like that's what's true for you.

[00:28:47] Celestine Pressley: Very true.

[00:28:47] Christy Rutherford: So once you got clarity on. Now all the things that were stored up waiting for you that you didn't have access to cause of your *inaudible* rate. I mean, I'm just saying right, you're, you're not the only one Celestine. So like all, all the resistance that you had was holding what is waiting for you and I tell women all the time, y'all aren't as, you aren't as far away from what you want as you think you are. We think it's the Grand Canyon because it ain't happening in a long time. So we'd be like, hello, hello, hello. You know ? Do you hear me hear? And always be like, what you want like right here. We have to figure out, what is this? That's what we do. What is this? Wall or energy? Once we move it, bam, then stuff starts hitting you in the head to where you're like, oh my God, I'm getting overwhelmed. It's too much at the same time. Slow down a little bit. .

[00:29:41] Celestine Pressley: No, really? I mean when, when that damn broke it was, it was overwhelming.

[00:29:47] And then, you know, to, you know, there was a lull and I was just like, okay, so I know what I heard. I know this is where I'm supposed to be headed, and I know, but wait a minute, nothing is... What? Wait, wait, wait, wait. There's a pause. It wasn't a no, it was a pause. And so in that season I had to, I started, you know, yeah, I'm human.

[00:30:07] I was like, okay, so did I really, you know, was all those stuff really happening? You, am I really supposed to move? Am I, you know, so I was questioning, I didn't make any rash decisions, but I was second guessing. But it was, you know, this is you. Even in that season, you still gotta trust the process. And so literally for the month of like February, it was silence, radio silence trying to find a home, trying to find, you know, hearing from these positions.

[00:30:36] And then all of a sudden, the beginning of March, everything, the floodgates opened again, so we weren't from zero to a hundred. And so in that you know, I'm, you know, we're full, full, full steam ahead and it's, it's happening. I'm walking in it, I'm walking by faith, you know I am very intentional and I'm focused, and so by, I say by June, I'll be a, a resident of some, a different state with a new, you know, a new job well before then. In a different, just a different season of my life. Even all of the opportunities, you know, one of the things I always talked about too, and I don't even know if I shared it in our coaching sessions, was my desire to speak public, speak and give back in this way.

[00:31:18] Those opportunities are even opening up and it just keeps happening back to back to back. Even the job that I was mentioning I'm in the running for two different positions. One of them was like, okay, so this is, these are the credentials that you have to follow to be able to do this. The other one was like, we encourage this and so we hope that you and I'm just like, okay, you encourage me to go out and speak and do all these things. Well, obviously that's aligned with who I am. That's an itch that I can scratch. And so all of those different nuances, is are, it's really coming together. And it goes back to you know, in the fall when I, you, you know, the suggestion, you, you gave the suggestion, write it down and then use your affirmations speaking it, you know, every single day.

[00:32:02] You know, and you gave a, a list of, of ones to get you started and then I catered them to me. I added the scriptures that I wanted to add and I made it to your point, for my dna, for how I'm created and how I'm wired. And so and then I just kept walking in it. To this day.

[00:32:25] Christy Rutherford: Woo. God damn. Celestine

[00:32:28] When do we?

[00:32:30] Celestine Pressley: I'm so down with you. Chrisy. .

[00:32:32] Christy Rutherford: This is so good. When did we started working? When was that? What was it? I, when was it?

[00:32:37] Celestine Pressley: It was like September, october. Something around those, those lines. Cuz I had my doctor's appointment in August and I just remember it. I was like, listen, I am not getting out checking outta here.

[00:32:47] I got a seven year old now eight. I got stuff to do. I got places to see I got worlds, you know, countries to visit. This is not worth it. So I need to figure out... I know it's attainable. Some, there's something off and I need to figure out what that is so I can get there.

[00:33:03] Christy Rutherford: Yeah. It's been five months, right, because you just finished a monthly, it's a four month process and you know, I got a note this morning from somebody, I was like you know, y'all did help me more then, you know, my, any, any therapist and anything I've been doing in the past three years, in the past two months. And so, you know, here's the thing, right? Just like I said, just like I said, you know, I'd like to say I told you so, now we talking about this furniture thing. Once you move Celestine once we peel back and rolled away all the old paint that was covering the beautiful piece of furniture that is highly valuable, more valuable than anything that's done now. Everybody sees it and they want it.

[00:33:46] Celestine Pressley: Yeah.

[00:33:47] Christy Rutherford: Now everything is happening and we talk about being overwhelmed with opportunity. See, we always think that we starving for stuff, but when opportunity really comes in like a flood, you be like, hold up. It's too much all at the same time. I can't sift and sort. So I was like, all right, we'll put it on a spreadsheet because this is the thing that happens when you start to now start to correlate the data, we are nerds. You start to correlate the data. You be like, I like this part. I like this part. I don't like that part.

[00:34:14] I like this, I like this. I like this. Now you're now with the opportunity and now the awareness that the things are now starting to come. Now you're starting to tighten up on what you want. You be like, I don't like this part, but I like this part and this part. I like this part and this job. I like this part and this job.

[00:34:29] Then somebody comes with all the things that you say you like and you be. It's the new roadmap. You said you like these things. That's how God works. You be like, oh, you didn't like,

[00:34:37] Celestine Pressley: Never thought of it that way, and I think it was about your value and your work. My, my value speaking, the second person, my value of my worth, and knowing what I had to offer, even though outwardly people may have thought that way, that I felt that way about myself inwardly, you know, every time I got a job, I was grateful that somebody took a chance on me. And the reality is, I have worked really hard to get where I am, and so of course they're gonna want to hire me. Of course, I have something to contribute. Of course. You know, I have, you know, my, my individual DNA to leave to this world and whatever footprint and whatever that is. And so it's just a mindset.

[00:35:19] And once I was able to do that, I was able to really be more intentional about what I wanted and what Iwant. Even, even, you know, professionally, personally, relationships, all of that, just really understanding who I am. And you know, when you have those, you know, with interpersonal relationships, you have those disagreements, you are like, well wait a minute, lemme take this.

[00:35:41] Cuz I'm the kind of person, I don't like any kind of, I'm very easygoing, don't like any kind of disagreements, so I'm always the one trying to smooth things over. And so now I'm at the point where, wait a minute, is this something I could do long term? Is this really me? Do I really wanna fix it? Or is this God telling me that this ain't it?

[00:36:01] And let me keep going. And so that's a shift for me cuz I'm always miss fix it. And you mentioned that perfection thing. Lord have mercy. I never thought I was trying to walk in perfection. But I really just, I think it was me trying to be such a good Christian. I didn't realize that that had come across as perfectionism.

[00:36:23] Instead of just being authentic and human and showing my humanity as I, as I continue to grow and being transparent about that.

[00:36:33] Christy Rutherford: When you drink from the cup that Jesus pours, you would never thirst again, baby. Celestine never thirst for a job talking about why wouldn't they want me? That's the thing.

[00:36:44] Ooh, I love this conversation cause you, I get excited cause you're validating what I say. People think I'm full of-ish when I talk about this magical, happy fairytale, you know what I'm saying? Like unicorn riding existence where people actually, once you figure out that it's about you and you unlock you, everything that you want will come.

[00:37:06] Women don't believe me when I tell them. Right.

[00:37:09] Celestine Pressley: Well, we've been beat down, so, you know, we've just, life and things that we've been taught as children, you know and things that we've been taught by society in our church, whatever it is that, you know, that's, it's kind of not contradictory, but just so many systems of oppression out there to keep us, as you said, controlled.

[00:37:34] And you know, like the horse with the blinders, don't look to the right or to the left too much. You stay this course and this is what's gonna happen. And that's not necessarily, that's not how God wired us.

[00:37:48] Christy Rutherford: Nope.

[00:37:49] So good. I'm gonna get off the phone. We gonna dance when I get off, so, but this is the thing. It is contradictory to what we believe to be true about ourselves, which is why we still on the bottom, which is why black women have more degrees than everybody. We're at least paid, which is why people can write articles talking about how black women are gonna lose.

[00:38:08] And I'm over there talking about, let's go get this money. Right. Like if, and I talk about it all the time cuz I appreciate it and I hope they write me one day, Mackenzie said, black women are gonna lose the most in Covid before it even got started. Celestine, how you gonna predict that we gonna lose. And then we did 10 million in raises last year alone.

[00:38:26] $1.2 million in January, 2022. I'm getting approved people wrong because, and it starts with the woman on what you believe and, and are you willing to believe something different because a lot of women are not.

[00:38:40] Celestine Pressley: Very true.

[00:38:40] Christy Rutherford: A lot of women don't wanna, they don't wanna believe it because they become comfortable with complaining about where they are.

[00:38:45] And I'm over here talking about, let's go get this money. And you're like, no, I'm just gonna settle into this job. And, and suffer and complain.

[00:38:52] Celestine Pressley: Yeah. And not only that, what I've heard also was if I go for something higher, I'm going to work even harder. And one of the things that you pointed out that I thought was really interesting was that the higher you go to less work, you do.

[00:39:08] And so, you know, when I say that, cuz I've countered with that, there's silence cuz it's kind of like you don't know what you're talking about Celestine.

[00:39:21] Christy Rutherford: So you, you stop being a worker, be you start being a queen bee. A queen bee, who knows that she has valuable intellectual property. Celestine, we, we kind of spring chickens, but we ain't springing chickens. But right now what's most valuable, and I, and I want you to follow it up. What's most valuable? Our most, our, our greatest value to the market in this moment as senior women is our intellectual property, not our physical work.

[00:39:46] Celestine Pressley: No, I agree. My experiences, you know, as I've gone, you know, cuz I've talked to so many companies at this point, cause I told you I was overwhelmed, but I even enjoy that process because my answers have become more fine-tuned. I'm realizing how much stuff I've done over the years and how excited these people get every time I talk about it. And it's, it's, it's showing me, you know, all of those late nights, all of those, you know, late night readings and all of those, you know, confront, not confrontations, but discussions and trying to advocate and trying to move the needle and trying to drive solutions. All of those different things all conspired together to make all of the experience that I have now.

[00:40:32] And so I'm very comfortable just talking off the cuff because I've been, I've done so much from, you know you know, hands on, to low management, to middle management to where I am now. And it all, it all works together. So now I'm just at a point now where I'm just ready to pour that out in a different way and and, and it balance my life out.

[00:40:55] That's what's most important for me. I wanna make sure that. You know, I don't wanna, I don't feel the pressure to make every soccer game, but I wanna make a lot of them. I wanna be able to do some things that I love to do. I need to figure out what that is. You know I know you're, you're, you're going back to culinary school.

[00:41:12] I like to bake. I don't know if I wanna bake on that level. I don't know how, you know, do you give the food away because, you know, my cheeks are, are big cuz during covid I was baking and I cut. It wasn't nobody to get the food to, so I was eating it. So you know, all of those different things that I'm trying to figure out for my own self-care and just different, just balance it out and not be so stressed out.

[00:41:34] So that's, that's where I am. I really, really, really enjoy having these kind of discussions. And this is nothing for me. This is like air breathing, talking. And so having these, more of these type opportunities, having more opportunities to do, you know, to coach, you know, these jobs that I'm interviewing for are basically executive coaches.

[00:41:55] I'm getting a salary to coach CIOs. I mean, there's just, you can't beat that.

[00:42:04] Christy Rutherford: Hmm. I got one more question.

[00:42:06] Celestine Pressley: Yes ma'am.

[00:42:07] Christy Rutherford: We'll be on the phone for two hours. We gonna do a masterclass one day. We just gonna sit and talk for four hours and just let you ask questions cuz it's so good. Right? Because when you talked about how excited people get, we, when you walk into an interview thinking that, do they like me?

[00:42:24] What do I need to say to help them get? And you thirsty, they don't give you the job. People don't want people who are thirsty. People don't. People want women on their team who are passionate and know exactly who they are, could talk about it without shrinking. Now you standing there be like, I've done this, this, this, this, this.

[00:42:41] And they're like, my God, you've done. You're like, yep. And I've done this, this, this, this. Right, right. And they're not intimidated. They're not asking for you to play small. They're not asking for you to remove your greatness off your resume so you can and, and call you overqualified. When women say that they're overqualified, I'm like, you shooting too low?

[00:43:00] Why are you shooting at the ground?

[00:43:02] Celestine Pressley: I wholeheartedly agree with you. I can't tell you how many times, and it's just, it really bothers me that I've talked to some women who say I say, well, have you considered, you know, applying for this job? Well, I don't have the experie. And it's like, of course you do.

[00:43:17] You've been in this industry for all these years. There may be one or two items on that list that you might not know, but that's your opportunity to grow. If you apply for a job where you have, you can tick off everything on the list. Then you're overqualified. Where's the growth in that?

[00:43:34] Christy Rutherford: Ooh. Ooh. That was good.

[00:43:36] I hope you dropped that. You gotta watch the replay and get that . It's good. So,

[00:43:43] What I was hearing right now was we don't see how great we are. People see who we see. You know, one of my favorite scriptures when I found it, I was like, I'm gonna preach that forever. When the scouts were going into the promised land and they came back, they said we were grasshoppers in our own eyes.

[00:44:04] Celestine Pressley: In our own eyes. That's right.

[00:44:06] Christy Rutherford: And so we were to them, you know, they preached that wrong. They always like, we look. Giant. We don't like grasshoppers to the giants. No. The scripture says we were grasshoppers in our own site and so we were to them. People see who, you see you walking and out like a, like a, like a piece of used beat up furniture.

[00:44:26] Then they see used beat up furniture and you're gonna get the discount price.

[00:44:30] Celestine Pressley: Exactly.

[00:44:31] Christy Rutherford: But when you reveal and you do the, and all you gotta do is take off what life has done to you to reveal who's already there. People are like, so you original, huh? Yep.

[00:44:42] Celestine Pressley: Exactly. I, I to wholeheartedly agree with that. And the key is taking off the layers of crap.

[00:44:49] And that's where the work comes in. And you know, I encourage people, anyone who's listening to do that kind of work, face, face whatever music you need to face if you really are serious about where you're trying to go. Otherwise you'll just be, you know, walk Tasmanian devil just spinning around, clicking up a lot of dust, but not really getting anywhere.

[00:45:09] If you really wanna reach your goal, look in, look inward and fix that. And one of the things I love to tell people and I'll say, my coach says, if you're crazy making 20,000, you're gonna be crazy making 200,000. So you better, you know, work on you. And so I agree with that. You gotta, you gotta work on you, you, you know, you say that all the time, right?

[00:45:29] Christy Rutherford: I said that?

[00:45:31] Celestine Pressley: Crazy making 20, you're gonna be crazy making 200. It's true. It's true.

[00:45:36] Christy Rutherford: Yeah, that's a great segment for, to get my free case study. Go to changenowwithchristy.com. I have to add the commercial. Hey, when, cuz you talked about earlier being wwf, right? And I do want to go back to it briefly, . Cause at the end of my interview with Ingrid, you gotta watch it.

[00:45:50] I said, Ingrid, what advice do you have for women who, who think they wanna work with us? Ingrid's. Like, you better be ready. Yeah. Gonna hurt your feelings. I said, Ingrid, that's not a good commercial. Right? But, but this is the thing Celestine, we don't have anybody because the hardest thing that we do is to get is to see how great you are. That's hard work, and it shouldn't be that hard, but it is because we're wrestling against what we truly believe or is contradictory or the, you know, the the loudest thing that's going on with the press. And we're coming over here a whole new conversation talking about you don't, God got something metaphor, you just stop playing.

[00:46:27] And it's wrapped up in a career coach. So what advice do you have for women who are considering working with us and they're not sure if, if what you talking about is woowoo and maybe you the one that smoked the herb and got the, got the results.

[00:46:39] So what advice do you.

[00:46:41] Celestine Pressley: I would say be open. Check your ego at the door.

[00:46:44] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:46:45] Celestine Pressley: And just be open to change. You know, how bad do you want it? And if you really want to achieve those goals that seem unattainable, that really are attainable you know, do the work.

[00:46:56] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:46:57] Celestine Pressley: take the time make the sacrifice and be consistent with, and it, you know, you will start to see immediately how you're feeling.

[00:47:05] Like I said, I, when I went through those forgiveness exercises, I would feel lighter. It was like literally something was lifted that I didn't even know was weighing me down. And so, all of that. Everything that you, and you mentioned, you always talk about the recipe. It's all interrelated and connected, and it all works together well.

[00:47:24] So if you don't do the forgiveness and you're still weighted down, it's like saying an affirmation, you know, trying to grab onto a balloon, but you got, you know, two tons of weight keeping you on the ground, you know, you gotta cut that weight so you can, when you're saying these affirmations and trying to lift in this, this balloon, you can, you can fly away.

[00:47:45] So you gotta cut that weight, those weights from the past, and you gotta acknowledge that they're there,

[00:47:53] Christy Rutherford: You know? Thank you for that. It's, it's interesting because when I, I, I, you know, I talked to a lot of women and it's not really about the job.

[00:48:03] Celestine Pressley: Mm-hmm.

[00:48:04] Christy Rutherford: We want our money though. Right. And I tell people all the time, like, you got so much more than just the opportunities for work. You got freedom, you got joy, you know, you got a, you got clarity and vision on where you're going.

[00:48:18] Now, you know what won't get you there, which is how you can say, no, I don't want my son to go to this elite school. And people are like, what? And you're like, no, I, this is not how I want to feel. I want to feel this way and God will make the way for me to get what I want because I'm now on his path and not bouncing around on, you know, other people's paths.

[00:48:37] So Yeah, this is so good. I took all kind of notes.

[00:48:40] Celestine Pressley: Did you? Aww

[00:48:41] Christy Rutherford: yes. Right there.

[00:48:42] Celestine Pressley: That's, that's so nice. I usually been, well, I mean, I guess the situation has reversed cuz I took a lot of notes and read a lot of books and listened to a lot of, and I'm still listening. Listen to a lot of different speakers just to keep me focused.

[00:48:54] Christy Rutherford: Mm-hmm.

[00:48:54] Celestine Pressley: But I appreciate the opportunity and I'm so glad that I took the chance and the leap because like I said, I, you know, as someone who went through a Bible college, then went to Howard School of Divinity, who's been working in ministry for years and knew all, every, you know, everything, you know, all the people and everything had a measure of success.

[00:49:17] And, you know, one of my previous pastors who passed away always talked about that walking into your purpose. So as a good Christian, you will have a measure of success. It's a measure. But then there's this whole warehouse full of things that God has in store for you that is waiting for you, once you walk in your purpose.

[00:49:37] Christy Rutherford: You telling the secret to this program, Celestine it's really God. It's a God program. People don't know. I'll be like, y'all think we talk about money and writing resumes? This is not what it's about, but I think it's time to like, you know, just let the cat outta the bank. This is God's program. Like, come on over here, let's get.

[00:49:56] So you can be free for yourself, free for your family, keep your kids outta therapy talking about Obama crazy and, and we'll out and been spending time with them. I mean, you know what I'm saying? Like, yeah. It's, it's, you get so much more than the job. The job is the job is the job. The job is like the cherry on top, the stuff that you get, the freedom and the balance that you just talked about, right?

[00:50:13] Like, we're always thinking that if we get a good job, I'll find the balance. I'm like, no, you get the balance and then you'll get the job to now match the balance that you've now achieved and that you don't wanna let go of.

[00:50:24] Celestine Pressley: Right. Exactly. Exactly. And that's where I am. And really being intentional and strategic and, and staying true to that.

[00:50:33] And, you know, not all money's good money. So, you know, making sure that once you figure out what it is and how you want to get there, stay true to that cuz the money will come. It will come faster than you think, and that's how I see it.

[00:50:49] Christy Rutherford: It'll hit you right in the head. So, all right, well Celestine, don't hang up.

[00:50:52] Thanks everybody for showing up. I hope you enjoyed this. If you missed the beginning, y'all need to go back, not only to hear Celestine's phenomenal bio that's longer than you know, Three feet, but , but to catch the beginning of the interview and just, you know, I hope that you know, that this conversation blessed you like it blessed me. It did bless me. So again, thank you so much. Thanks for listen for showing us. Thank y'all.

[00:51:14] Narrator: Thank you for joining us. Be sure to subscribe to this podcast and leave us a review. If you love this episode, follow Christie on Instagram and LinkedIn, and don't forget to get her free gift by texting CHANGENOW, all one word again, CHANGENOW to 6 6 8 6 6. Until next time, go out and win bigger.