[00:00:00] Dr Renee White: Power and we are all about empowering the mamas of the world. In each episode, we will unravel and interpret the latest research and evidence-based practices for pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood. As mums and researchers ourselves, we have experienced firsthand the overwhelming complexity of information myths and those classic old wives tales.

[00:00:25] I'm Dr. Renee White, and this is the Science of Motherhood. Hello and welcome to episode 183 of The Science of Motherhood. I am your host, Dr. Renee White, also the founder of Fill Your Cup, which you're gonna talk about a little bit today. There's Australia's first doula village, and today's check-in Tuesday episode is gonna be a bit of a personal one.

[00:00:51] We are going to be diving deep into something that is incredibly close to my heart and that is anxiety in motherhood. Now, we hear a lot about postnatal depression, but I really don't think that postnatal anxiety gets the airplay that it truly deserves. And we're talking about, you know, not just the everyday worries that come with caring for tiny humans, but the real raw experience of maternal anxiety that can completely transform your postpartum journey.

[00:01:31] This is going to be a bit of a vulnerable share for me today because I'm going to tell you about my own experience with postpartum anxiety and I guess how it, it kind of, you know, stopped me from expanding my own family and ultimately led me to quit my career as an attorney. And the silver lining was that I created Fill your cup.

[00:02:01] So before we dive in, I just wanted to say if you are struggling with anxiety as a mama or you're pregnant and you're worried about your mental health. This episode is for you and let's get real about what anxiety and motherhood actually looks like, and more importantly, what can we do about it?

[00:02:23] Obviously, there are many resources in the show notes if this episode is triggering to, to you. Um, and so yes, please feel free to access those if you need it. All right, let's dive into today's episode, which I will start from the very beginning. This is my experience and I wanna take you back to, um, you know, 2017 I was a biochemist turned intellectual property, uh, attorney. I had my career sorted. I was organized, I was prepared. And when I got pregnant, I read every single book I had. Um, I kind of had, you know, a birth plan. I thought I was ready. I totally thought I was ready and my running joke is always, you know, I had two batches of spaghetti bolognese in the freezer and thought, I've got this.

[00:03:21] Well, newsflash, I absolutely did not. So, you know, I had no idea what the postpartum period was gonna look like. I was just like ladi daring through pregnancy, I think I was already someone who lived with anxiety and I managed it well in my professional life through, I guess structure and control and evidence-based decision making, but nothing, and I mean, nothing could have prepared me for the complete loss of control that comes with becoming.

[00:03:58] A mother, the sleep deprivation hit me like an absolute freight train, but it wasn't just. About being tired. It was the way my anxious brain started spiraling in the middle of the night. You know, I don't think I'm alone. When I say the fact that like every little sound my daughter made, made like this kind of like catastrophe in my mind, is she breathing?

[00:04:28] Is that crying different? Am I doing this wrong? Am I failing her? You know, all of those things. Am I being. You know, the good mum, and it was just, yeah, really, really overwhelming. And what made it worse was that I didn't recognize what was happening to me. I thought that this was just like what motherhood felt like.

[00:04:49] And I remember feeling like having lots of kind of out of body experiences. And I thought every new mum felt like they were drowning. Like they couldn't catch a breath, that their heart was racing when their baby was sleeping peacefully. And so. I remember having this conversation with my psychologist at the time, and I remember saying to her, I think I have postnatal depression.

[00:05:17] And she walked me through it and you know, asked me some questions and she said, no, I don't, I don't think you do. And I just kept thinking, but I'm having these out of body experiences and I can feel my brain changing. And these deep. Deep kind of soul changing feelings and I just thought, oh my goodness, what is this?

[00:05:39] And really it was, it, it was a lot of matresence, like, you know, the whole remodeling of the brain and all of those feelings. But it was, it was such a life changing experience for me that, you know, when it kind of came time to think about adding to our family. My postpartum experience was so challenging.

[00:06:05] Like it was such a, uh, I think it was such a crack in my soul that my husband and I made the devastating decision that we wouldn't expand our family from three to four as we'd originally planned because of just this overwhelming cloud. You know, the thought. Of going through that darkness again, just totally felt impossible.

[00:06:39] And I have to say that there's a few things around that. The fact that we didn't have friends and family close by, I didn't know what a doula was. I had no concept of that whatsoever. I think I'd heard of a birth doula, but like, I was like, I don't need that. Like, I need someone afterwards. And the, yeah, postpartum doulas were just not even on my radar at that stage.

[00:07:01] And, you know, we, we made that decision and we worked through that decision with a psychologist and it was a very tough decision to make. And it took me a really, really long time to. To reconcile with that, and I'm still quite an anxious person. I'm not as anxious because I've got the tools in the toolkit and I'll have to say that I don't think I.

[00:07:32] You know, caring for your mental health is dissimilar to, you know, tweaking your back at the gym. You would go and see a physio or a remedial massage therapist. You would check in with someone for body work, very similar as you would. For your mental health. You know, if I'm starting to see myself spiral or go into a bit of a kind of dark kind of pattern, then I'll just flick my psychologist an email and say, Hey, I need to check in.

[00:08:03] I kind of call almost like you're getting, you know, your oil changed or whatever it is for your car. It's like you do these regular check-ins and you get yourself back on track and you keep going. But I guess, here's the thing, and, and this is crucial, I never wanted another mum to endure what I did. And so fast forwarding after making that decision, you know, we were in the middle of Melbourne's COVID Lockdowns in 2020, and I decided that I was gonna quit my job.

[00:08:39] And retrain as a postpartum doula and fill your cup was born and that that is how it is all kind of eventuated. So that's my personal experience and I wanted to talk to you around the science of understanding maternal anxiety because I think. That's a really important piece. I find once people start talking about the whys, it makes more sense and then we can normalize this experience even more.

[00:09:09] So let's talk about what's actually happening in your brain and your body when you experience maternal anxiety because. I truly believe that understanding the science can be incredibly empowering. So first, let's be clear about the numbers. Postpartum anxiety effects up to around, you know, 15% of new mothers here in Australia, and that's.

[00:09:35] Probably an underestimate because so many women suffer in silence. I can tell you it's actually probably more common than postpartum depression. But you know, we talk about it far, far less with my biochemistry hat on from a biochemical perspective. Your body is essentially going through like a massive hormonal shifts after birth, so your estrogen and progesterone levels plummet dramatically, and we're talking about a more significant hormonal change than menopause, but it happens in a matter of days instead of years. On top of, you know, these hormonal changes, they directly affect your neurotransmitters. So these are kind of like. Uh, you know, the chemical messengers in your brain. So we've got serotonin, which helps regulate mood and anxiety, and that can be significantly impacted.

[00:10:36] And then you add to this, the stress hormone cortisol, which becomes elevated with sleep deprivation and general stress of caring for a newborn. But I guess what what's really important to understand if you already had anxiety before pregnancy, you are at a higher risk for postpartum anxiety, and the risk factors include, you know, previous history of anxiety or depression, significant life stresses, lack of social support, traumatic birth experiences.

[00:11:13] Feeding difficulties, all of those things. Now, I did not know that before I delved into pregnancy and postpartum, and so your brain is also in like a hypervigilant state designed to protect your baby. Now, this is an evolutionary kind of mechanism. Your anxiety system is literally designed to keep your offspring alive, but, but sometimes the system kind of goes into overdrive and creates anxiety. That's, I guess, disproportionate to actual threats. I distinctly remember something like this happening where the room that my daughter was in when she was an infant. So this is, you know, post six months, this little skink lizard.

[00:12:02] So like, you know, tiny little skin lizard, which normally would not bother me at all. Like whatever, it's, it is what it is. It came into the room and it was kind of up on her curtains on the top. And I remember I was sitting there in the feeding chair and I was watching this thing like scurry around inside the room. And I almost had like a panic attack. Like I had to text my husband and, and tell him he had to come up immediately and find this thing. And it was like, it was, it was nighttime, like it was bedtime. My daughter was feeding to sleep. Like normally you just like, do wake the baby, you know, type of thing.

[00:12:49] But I was like, I remember I was just sweating and I like had this completely irrational reaction to this tiny little skin. My husband still talks about it to this day of it being in the room because I perceived it as a threat. I just kept thinking, oh my God, what if it lands in the cot? What if it lands on me?

[00:13:12] What? Like, what's this thing gonna do? So, totally, totally understand this, and I wanna emphasize that the key thing to remember out about all of this is that postpartum anxiety. Is not your fault. It's not a sign of weakness, and it is absolutely treatable. So I just wanna walk you through, recognizing the signs now.

[00:13:37] So let's talk about what maternal anxiety actually looks like because it's not always that obvious. So I've kind of alluded to a few already. So, physical symptoms may include racing, heart, shortness of breath, nausea, dizziness, muscle tension, trouble sleeping, even when you have the opportunity. When we are looking at emotional and mental symptoms, they can include things like excessive worrying about bubby's health and safety.

[00:14:15] Um, it could be like intrusive thoughts about harm coming to your baby or yourself. Feeling like you need to constantly check on your baby. Difficulty concentrating, uh, feeling overwhelmed by like everyday tasks and, and maybe even irritability or restlessness. When we're looking at behavioral signs, we are thinking about avoiding certain activities or places due to worry, you know, repeatedly, as I said, checking in on bubs, difficulty leaving bubby with others, or perhaps procrastinating on decisions due to fear of making the wrong choice.

[00:14:59] But one thing I have to say that's really important to distinguish is the difference between normal new parent worry and like a clinical anxiety. And look, I'm not a psychologist, but he, here's what I've learned is that it's normal to worry about your baby. That's like your maternal instinct working.

[00:15:24] But when the worry becomes so intense that it starts to really interfere with your daily functioning, your sleep, your relationships, your ability to enjoy a time with bubby. That's when you're looking at something that really needs some attention. So intrusive thoughts deserve special mention here.

[00:15:50] These are things like unwanted, distressing thoughts that pop into your head, like imagining dropping your bubby or something terrible happening. You know, having these thoughts doesn't make you a bad mum. It doesn't mean you want these things to happen. They're actually very common, but they can be.

[00:16:12] Incredibly distressing if you don't understand what they are. Now, with all of that said, we need to talk about some practical strategies and solutions for all of these. And I know this is probably what everyone's waiting for they're like, okay, so what do I actually do, Renee? So first and foremost, this is probably where you wanna get your pen and paper ladies, some immediate coping strategies, breath work. That's what I, that's my go-to. I'm always leaning on breath work. It's just like. You know, I just try to breathe through it so when your anxiety hits, your breathing can become quite shallow. I know it does for me. So what you might wanna try is what's called the 4 7 8 technique.

[00:17:02] So you wanna breathe in for four counts, hold for seven, exhale for eight, and this activates our parasympathetic nervous system and tells your body it's safe. To relax, you can ground yourself using the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 technique. I use this one as well a lot, so you want to just pause and you want to name five things you can see.

[00:17:28] Four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, one thing you can taste, and this really kind of grounds you and brings you back to the present moment. So that's a bit of breath work and I guess checking out your environment. The next few tips I would say are around nutrition and lifestyle factors.

[00:17:52] So your brain needs fuel. To manage anxiety, so things like protein rich snacks, they can help stabilize your blood sugar. This is actually why we created our lactation cookies with high protein content. You don't want your blood sugar spiking and crashing that can mimic and worsen some anxiety symptoms.

[00:18:13] You wanna think about things like Omega-3 fatty acids, they're crucial for brain health. You wanna be reaching for things like salmon, walnuts, flax seeds. Magnesium is also a beautiful one, it's nature's relaxation mineral. You'll find those in our postpartum recovery sits, for example, in terms of your diet, you wanna be looking at dark, leafy green nuts.

[00:18:38] And then I guess from a holistic perspective, you wanna be looking at your support system, as I already alluded to, like if things aren't feeling great for me, I go in for my quote unquote oil change with my psychologist. And so I just tap back in and, and you know, this is where something like a doula village model comes in.

[00:19:01] Having consistent, reliable support means you're not carrying the mental load alone. When you know someone competent is there to help your anxiety brain to start to relax, we've had. Lots and lots of mums reach out to us, and one of the number reason, number one, reasons why they have for their birth and postpartum is because they have pre-existing mental health challenges, and that includes anxiety because they know that they need that consistent person to come into the home, cook them nourishing meals, hold space for them, and ensure that they're taking time to stop and relax and recover properly.

[00:19:41] So I really think that professional support is crucial. Things like gp, perinatal, psychologist, counselor, you want someone who can specialize in maternal mental health. And also something like cognitive behavioral therapy is incredibly effective for anxiety. So I just wanna say, if you're listening to this and recognizing yourself in my story, I want you to know.

[00:20:11] That you are not alone. You are not broken and there is absolutely hope. My personal experience with postpartum anxiety was devastating at the time, but it led me to create fill your cup, which is now such a beautiful network of doulas. We have supported hundreds of families across Australia since the inception of our village.

[00:20:37] And you know, sometimes our greatest struggles become our greatest purpose. So I just wanna say your mental health matters, not just for you, but for your family. So taking care of anxiety, it's not selfish. It is absolutely essential, and you cannot pour from an empty cup. And that's exactly why I called fill your cup. Fill your cup, because you know. You've got to be able to show up as the mum that you want to be. So if you are struggling, please reach out, whether it's to your doctor or a mental health professional, or to us at, fill your cup. If you're a bit lost and you don't know who to contact.

[00:21:22] Just DM us on Instagram at Fill Your Cup underscore or jump onto our website I fill your cup.com and we can help navigate that journey for you and hopefully put you in the right direction because you really deserve to enjoy this journey as, as, as a mum. Alright everyone, until next week, I will see you. Bye.

[00:21:45] If you loved this episode, please hit the subscribe button and leave a review. If you know someone out there who would also love to listen to this episode, please hit the share button so they can benefit from it as well. You've just listened to another episode of The Science of Motherhood proudly presented by Fill Your Cup, Australia's first doula village. Head to our website I fill your cup.com to learn more about our birth and postpartum doula offerings where every mother we pledge to be the steady hand that guides you back to yourself. Ensuring you feel nurtured, informed, and empowered so you can fully embrace the joy of motherhood with confidence. Until next time, bye.