Trish: [00:00:00] Let go of the fear of tearing. We fear the unknown. We fear a threat. Birth is not a threat. Tearing is not a threat. It's what your body is supposed to do. Welcome to the birth experience podcast. I'm Trish Ware, a long time labor and delivery RN turned online birth educator slash virtual doula. I've had the amazing privilege of delivering many, many babies in my 16 plus year career as a labor and delivery nurse.

And as a mom of seven, I'm here to help you take the guesswork out of childbirth so you can make the choices that are right for you and your baby and write the birth story of your dreams. So hit subscribe and let's replace your anxiety and fear with complete confidence. Quick note, this podcast is for educational purposes only and does not replace [00:01:00] your medical advice from your provider.

Check out our full disclaimer at the bottom of the show notes.

Whenever I pull my audience and ask, What are you most afraid of when it comes to birth? Number one, it's always the unknowns, or being coerced by your providers, or not being listened to by your providers.

However, another really common one is vaginal tearing. I hear this all the time. In fact, when I first started teaching online, I asked my fellow mama friends, what should I start with? And they all said vaginal tearing. So we're going to start with that And I wanted to start with this fear, because this one Ladies, is super easy to deal with because if you don't listen to another bit of this, which I [00:02:00] hope you stay to the end, but if you don't listen to any more of it, I want you to know, here's my insider pro tip. This is from a labor and delivery nurse of 16 years, hundreds of thousands of babies.

Well, maybe not that many, but lots and lots and lots of babies. I'm going to tell you this insider tip right here. It's not that bad. Vaginal tearing is not as bad as you fear. The fear of it, the anxiety, the things you think of in your mind, is a lot worse than it actually happening. So we're going to break it down today because I want you to stop worrying about that.

One of the most important things you can do, and this is something I work hard on, like I go hard in my birth courses, is all about releasing fear. Fear leads to tension. Tension leads to tight muscles. Tight muscles leads to difficult labor, including increased chances of tearing. [00:03:00] So we're going to break it down.

We're going to talk about what it is, what it isn't. We're going to talk about some ways that you can decrease your chances of a worse tear. Now, did I say prevent? No. You can't absolutely prevent it, but we're going to talk about some ways that you can lessen your chances There are some things that are inside your control and then there's some things outside of your control So we're going to go over it all at the end.

You're going to take a nice deep breath And when you release your breath, you're going to throw your hands in the air and you're going to release this fear. I also have a really cool download ebook, a little guide to tearing and an action plan is included in it. You can go to labornursemama. com forward slash tearing to get it and, you can check it out and have a nice little guide to tearing.

Bye. Main tip, don't sweat it. It's okay. I promise. We're going to go [00:04:00] into full detail.

All right. So what is tearing? Tearing is exactly what you think it is. It is a tear to your lady bits. Let's talk about how often do people tear. Depending on your risk factors, the stats say that 9 out of 10 first time mamas are going to tear. Now the type of tear is dependent on you and your situation.

However, the majority of women have a first degree or second degree tear. Those are the most common. So we're going to talk about the types of tearing. The ones that we should be a little more wary of are the third and fourth degree tears, but not many mamas do. Get those. So I don't want you to worry about it.

So let's talk about the different types of tears. First degree tear is the least severe. It only affects [00:05:00] the perineal skin, so the outside layer. It's a graze. Insiders, like me, labor nurses, and birth professionals, we call that a skid mark. There's no repair needed and you're going to heal pretty quickly.

It can be sore. I mean, we're talking about your vagina. The healing part can be a little sore. But girl, you're going to stock up on those postpartum supplies and I'm going to have a link in the show notes to everything I talk about, so don't worry about taking notes. But you're going to want to have your padsicles, I'll give you the recipe.

You're going to want to have your EpiFoam. You're going to want to have your peroneal spray. You're going to want to have your dermaplast. You're going to want to have all of these things so that this is not a huge deal during your postpartum recovery. Now, second degree tears, they affect the muscle of the perineum and the perineal skin, so they go a little deeper.

They usually need stitches, sometimes just a few. The repair is [00:06:00] done right after your placenta comes out in the labor room. If you have an epidural, we'll keep it running. If you don't have an epidural, The provider will give you a little bit of an injection of lidocaine and you'll be on your way. They usually don't cause long term problems, neither first degree tears or second degree tears.

However, like I said before, they can be sore. A 2nd degree tear is going to take you a little longer to heal, but I promise you, it's not horrible. Now, 3rd degree tear. These are the ones that get a little more complicated. However, they're very uncommon. Very uncommon. So I don't want you to be stressing about this.

Third degree tears go from the vagina to the anus. Not fun at all. This will involve the perineal skin. The muscle tissue [00:07:00] and the anal sphincter muscles as well. It will require repair. No ifs, ands, or buts. Usually a third degree tear repair is done in the labor room with your epidural running or like before, will give you a injection of lidocaine.

The External stitches usually dissolve within a few weeks, like two weeks tops, but the internal may take up to 12 weeks. This type of tear can also cause you some pelvic floor issues, so I recommend to my girls inside Calm Labor Confident Birth that they ask for a referral or they contact a pelvic floor specialist and go ahead and be on top of that girl, you want to make sure you are ahead of it so that you don't have any problems.

They can assess you and let you know if you're a candidate so go ahead and just [00:08:00] do it and most times I believe insurance will cover that. Fourth degree tear. This is the big daddy, and this is the one that causes the most issues. This is the most severe, but also the least common. It extends through the anal sphincter and into the mucous membrane lining the rectum.

No fun at all. So you're gonna have all the way from the vagina to the booty, and it's pretty intense. It usually is repaired in the operating room. So they're going to take you to the operating room, clean you up, and it takes about three months to heal as well. And it most likely will cause some pelvic floor issues.

This really depends on you and your health status on whether or not. So make sure, third or fourth degree tear, I want you to get a referral for a pelvic floor specialist. Now, how [00:09:00] do we care for our tears? This is something I want you guys to be prepared for, just in case. The number one way that you can prepare for a tear or for healing, recovery, is to be educated.

You need to be educated. I want you to know. what the types of tears are. So kudos to you. You're learning that right now. And I want you to know what you can do to care for them. So this is something I'm going to have in the show notes. We're not going to go into too much detail, but there's a couple of things I recommend that you get.

One is called a sitz bath. This is a handy little Postpartum Golden Nugget. You want one of these. There's a great one that's collapsible on Amazon, and I have a link to it, and you can store it very easily. Keep it for your next baby. It's not only good for tearing, but it's also good for a sore [00:10:00] perineum and for hemorrhoids.

This is valuable to have. They are amazing. It's a little like tub thing, looks like a mini baby bath and you sit it in your toilet and you have very warm water in it and some of them have like a bag with a Catheter that comes down like a tube that comes down and it replenishes it with more hot water And you just can really clean and soothe the area.

I love them The other thing you want to do, like I said before, is do some padsicles, prepare them ahead of time. I recommend to my girls 6 to 8. Typically, my mamas who go over 8 to 10 usually have too many and have them left over. So make a nice batch. You're not going to want to use them for long. The other thing I recommend having is tux pads and EpiFoam.

You can get these in the hospital. Hint, hint, any supplies we give you in the hospital, ask for extra. Anything that [00:11:00] is reusable, we're going to throw away. So take it with you. Take your peri bottle. It looks like a little mustard. It looks like a mustard or ketchup, like a condiment bottle with a pointy tip.

Use it. Word of caution. When you use it, make sure you don't touch yourself with it. I have to tell my patients all the time because they'll put it right up there and get the tip on their vagina. You don't want to do that. You're setting yourself up for infection. So make sure you hold it a few inches away and before you sit down on the toilet or have your partner or someone Fill it up with nice warm water.

And after you go to the bathroom, clean off with that and then pat dry. You don't want to rub if you have a tear.

My hope for you guys is that you're going to stretch and accommodate the baby, but some of you just might need a little more room. Here's what I want you to know about tearing. [00:12:00] Tearing is our body's way of accommodating So you don't need to be scared about it. This is how our body works. And our body is so Amazing.

It heals so beautifully. I want you to think about this. When you're pushing your baby out, if it needs a little more room, then the vagina is made to tear a little to accommodate the baby. Do not be worried about it. This is what we want to happen if the baby needs more room. Now, there are some things that you can do to help prevent that from happening.

One of the best things you can do, one of the absolute best things that you can do is eat a healthy diet during pregnancy and stay hydrated. Think about our perineum as skin because it is. Just like your face. So if [00:13:00] you were trying to clear up your face or have better skin on your face You would drink a lot of water and eat a healthy diet.

Like that is the best thing to get nice glowing Skin that's healthy. So I want you to remember that when you're thinking about vaginal tearing and birth in general Two of the most powerful things you can do. We're going to talk a little bit more about some other ways that you can help decrease your chances of tearing.

However, I want to talk about the risks. So we're going to talk about that first. What increases the risk of vaginal tearing? Here are some things that can increase your risk. We're not going to go over them all, but we'll talk about some. A big baby. So a big baby usually means a big head. There's two ways that you could potentially prevent a big baby.

If you're gestational diabetic, keeping those blood sugars in control, eat a healthy diet [00:14:00] during pregnancy, all of you. Get moving. Go walking. But you know what? If your husband is is six foot six or like one of my students, your husband weighed 11 pounds when he was born and you were eight or nine pounds, then chances are you're going to have a big baby.

And I don't want you to worry about that. Your body made this baby and your body can push this baby out. Now talking about diet and Nutrition, if you gain a lot of weight, so that's another risk factor, a high weight gain. So again, eat a healthy diet. Don't fall into the trap of you're eating for two. Eat healthy.

Eat according to your body's needs. Another thing that can increase your risk that you can't really control once you're pregnant is if you're young, really young, or an older mama. So teens and older moms tend to tear a little bit more. I've [00:15:00] been both with my first, I was very young, and I did tear and episiotomy because my doctor was in a hole and we'll talk about that on another podcast.

Any use of assisted devices? Like forceps and vacuums, those can all increase the chance of a vaginal tear or a more significant tear. So, One of the ways that you can decrease the likelihood of an assisted device is to keep moving, to get on your hands and knees, to get on your side, to get into a position that isn't a flat on your back with your feet in the air, which if you follow me on Instagram, I'm labor.

nurse. mama You know I get into all of these soap stands or soap boxes, whatever you call it, about big babies, about pushing. And the pushing one really gets me fired up. I don't understand [00:16:00] why in the world that it is okay that we are told to lay flat on our back with our feet in the air in the exact same position that we get a pap smear.

This position is called lithotomy, and it's asinine that they expect us to do that when we're having a baby, like, who in the world would ever lay flat on their back, put their feet up in stirrups, and try to poop when they're constipated? Pushing a baby out is the biggest constipation in the world. So why would you do that?

It makes no sense. And I'm getting fired up now. Hopefully that you'll, appreciate this, but you do not have to push in the thought of me. And if your provider says, well, that's how I do it, then you can say, well, that's not how I do it. And they cannot force you to get in the thought of me now in an emergent situation, if there's something unusual going on, that's different because it does allow them to clearly see the playing field.

If you get what I mean. But, during a, the natural process of birth, they do not [00:17:00] need a perfect view with the lights of God shining on your vagina for them to be able to deliver your baby. That's just BS. That's convenient. I teach my students inside both of my birth courses. I have one for VBAC Mamas called the VBAC Lab and one for everyone else called Calm Labor Confident Birth.

And I teach those students that we do not allow. You hear the words I'm using. Not let allow, because you're the boss, you're the birth queen. We do not allow them to do anything out of convenience. or curiosity. So you need to be educated. You need to take some sort of birth class, and I don't recommend a hospital provided one.

And here's why. They're going to teach you according to their policies. So if it's their policy that women push in lithotomy, guess what? You are going to be Told is the best way or led to believe. We don't want that. I want you guys to go against the policies. Be a rebel. Now, do we do it just willy [00:18:00] nilly?

Uh, no. I tell my girls also, there's no hard no's or hard yes's in labor. You have to be educated. You have to understand why would we need to use a forcep? Why would we need to use a vacuum? When is it appropriate? When is it necessary? Girl, I promise you if your baby's heart rate drops down in the 40s and things are looking scary, And you've tried position change, they've, if you're on Pitocin and they turn it off and you've done all that you can, you've got oxygen on, you've got fluids flowing, and the baby's heart rate's not coming out and they say to you, if I use a vacuum I can have the baby out in two seconds.

Hell yeah, use the vacuum. Do it. Right now. But, if you've been pushing for a while and your doctor's like, you've been pushing a long time, this might take a little bit longer, you want me to go ahead and put a vacuum on, now I don't think most doctors are going to do that, but there are some, then that's out of convenience and not for you.[00:19:00]

So, Learn, be educated, knowledge is power, knowledge is power, but only if you apply it. Okay, that's what happens when Trish gets off on a tangent. Sorry. Another risk factor is your first vaginal birth. Your road has not been paved. And someone has to pave it. So guess what? Baby number one is paving the path for all the other babies, like a little bulldozer.

So, you know, you might tear with your first baby. But again, what did I say? Once you say it out loud, it's okay. It's not a big deal. I'm gonna tell y'all right now I've had six babies unmedicated and I tore and had an episiotomy Because my doctor was an a hole with my first and I didn't feel either When you're pushing and when the baby's head is applying pressure onto the perineum, it kind of numbs it.

You only have so many pain [00:20:00] receptors and you're already feeling it, girl. So you're not gonna feel the tear. You might feel a little bit of a tug, but it's not pain like you think it's gonna be pain. I know when I say your vagina is gonna tear, it sounds very painful, but I promise if you have an epidural, you won't know.

But if you are unmedicated and you're worried about this, let it go. You're not going to know either. It's not going to affect you. I promise.

Things that increase your chances that are sort of in your control and sort of not, but there's also some choices that you can make during childbirth that will decrease your likelihood of tearing. One is going unmedicated. Unmedicated patients are less likely to tear. This is not completely evidence based, but there are a lot of people who believe that, and from my career, this is what I've seen.

When you have an epidural, you're not able to listen to your [00:21:00] body. per se, while you're pushing. Whereas a unmedicated patient who isn't flat on her back, who's listening to her body, who's moving, who's listening to the pain cues and the different things and getting into a position that works for her body is less likely to tear and less likely to tear more significantly.

Most unmedicated patients can kind of. guide the pushing based on what their body's telling them. So, if you are planning on an unmedicated delivery, this is another reason to go with it. If you're planning on an epidural, girl, do not go unmedicated because you're afraid of tearing. That's not the way you want to do it.

If you choose unmedicated out of fear of other things, you're not going to have as good of an unmedicated birth as someone who really just wants to do it. So don't let anyone pressure you and don't let your fear drive you. Another one that you can control is pushing position. I've already gotten off on a soapbox on this one, [00:22:00] so I want you to start thinking about this now, no matter where you are in your pregnancy.

This is a dialogue you want to start having with your provider early on. If you go into your 20 week appointment and you say, Hey provider, I want to talk to you about pushing positions. Because I don't want to push in lethotomy and they say, oh, well, that's how I push all my patients. It's safer. It gives me more Opportunity to help you if something's wrong.

We don't want something to happen to the baby Then girl high tail it out of there and find a better provider. If your provider says something like oh, we've got time Let's talk about it later. Girl, high tail it out of there Or say, no, I'd rather speak about it now because chances are they're putting you off because they're going to put you into lithotomy or try.

This is something you have control over. You can choose how you push. I had a student who was laboring unmedicated and she starts getting the urge to push. She's, the [00:23:00] fetal ejection reflex is kicking in. This girl is pushing effectively. The provider comes in. Puts her on her back, puts her feet in the stirrups, and she pushes the baby out and gets a third degree tear.

Now, would she have gotten one if she pushed in the position she wanted? We don't know, but chances are she wouldn't have because she was pushing in the way her body was dictating. She was listening to her body. Just like when we go poo poo, no one comes in and tells us to move around and get in a position that's convenient for them.

We do it according to our body. You have rights. You have rights. In fact, when you get admitted into the hospital, guess what? They're going to tell you all about your patient rights, but then they're going to act like you don't have them. Now, all, do, does all of them know I don't want to act like everybody does?

And most of the time your nurses are all for you having your rights and doing what you want. [00:24:00] We have no problem with that. There are some old school doctors and there's some doctors that hold to tradition and they have a harder time. So mama, you have rights. You do not have to do everything that you are told.

Now, this is why you want to have a good relationship with your provider. This is why you want to trust your provider, so that when they do suggest You can filter it through your education, the birth class that you took, and you can filter it through your instincts and make a wise decision together. But you have to trust your provider.

You have to know that they want what's best for you. Because I hate to break it, not all of them do. It's a business. And, you know, in their defense, we get used to doing things a certain way when we're in a business. It's not that they're doing something to harm you, but they might just be doing what's better for them or what they're used to.

And you know what? Let's shake it up. The birth culture has to change. Women should not be told they [00:25:00] have to push in a certain way. Women should not be told to suck it up and let me put my fingers in your vagina, check your cervix, because I want to know what you're dilated to. No, there should be an indication.

There should be a need. Now, be respectful when you're telling them your wishes. But don't be wishy washy. There are different positions. Upright positions, which use gravity, which are the best for your birth and for your birth to progress and to make your contractions more effective and to get baby out quicker.

However, upright positions, some of them increase your chances of tearing. Now, me personally, as a labor nurse, and if I were your virtual doula, or you're in one of my birth classes, I'm gonna say, girl, pick a position that works effectively. Don't worry about tearing. However, squatting increases your chances of tearing.

Just does. I love squatting. That's what I did with most of my babies. I only tore with my first. Laying on your back, laying on your side, or in lithotomy are horizontal positions. Upright positions [00:26:00] usually are less painful. They use gravity and they're better for the fetal well being. However, they all mostly lead to vaginal tearing, minus being on your hands and knees.

More blood flows to your labia when you're in an upright position. So it makes more sense, right? The traditional old school, most doctors want to do it, lethotomy position, is the highest chance of vaginal tearing. Like, let's ask men when they are going poop to lay back on their back, put their feet in the air in a stirrups, and poop.

None of them would do it, right? Why were we asked to do this? Well, I hate to break it, but it goes all the way back to some pervert king in France, I believe, that wanted women in that position. It was a position that had originally Oh, goodness. What surgery was it? Gallbladder removal? I, I don't remember.

Something. I'm bonking that one up, but it was a surgical position because [00:27:00] that's what it is. And this guy decided it would be a great way to be able to see a clear shot of a vagina when women were giving birth. So he would stand behind a curtain and the women would give birth in lithotomy so this perv could watch their vagina.

I mean, I don't even get it. Most of the partners and daddies do not even want to look down there. So I, I just don't get it. But you know, there's always that one weirdo and that one weirdo affected the rest of our history of maternal care. We need to change it. Let's stop it, and the only way it will change is if we all speak up and say no.

During my births, my unmedicated births, I used so many different positions. I would move around according to what my body was saying, and I would use positions to relieve pain. But, when it was time for the baby to actually come out, now I might have been pushing and squatting, I might have been pushing on my hands and knees, or standing next to the bed, or what have you.

[00:28:00] However, whatever I landed in when baby was ready to come out is how the baby came out. So, you can do that. My midwife respected me. My midwife listened to me. It's your birth. You're the center of the birth. Do it how you want and don't feel guilty about it. You're not doing anything wrong to say no. Now, another thing that can be done during birth to help you out to keep you from tearing is support of the perineum.

They can use either hands or Gloved, obviously, or they can use warm compresses on either side of the, the perineum to kind of put pressure there to help when the baby comes out. Now that is dependent on your position because you're, if you're squatting, no one's going to get down there and lay under you.

So now what I've seen with some unmedicated mamas and for myself, I have just naturally put my hands down there to support the perineum when the baby's about to come out. I have seen a lot of [00:29:00] doctors like kind of swap mama's hands away So if that happens be like listen, I can touch my own vagina get your hands away from me You're allowed to touch your vagina.

It's no problem. This is not a sterile environment. This is a vagina Another thing that I want to talk about, because I get asked this all the time, is what about perineal massage during delivery? I am a huge fan of it during pregnancy, towards the end of pregnancy. In fact, I teach my girls this. But, you do not want to do it during birth.

This is something that can increase the likelihood of your vagina tearing. When they massage it with oils or KY Jelly or whatever, it can increase the blood flow and increase the friability and you might tear. So girl, don't let this happen. If they start doing this, you're going to have more bruising and more tearing.

Speak up. A hands off approach is much smarter when [00:30:00] it comes to massage. Another choice that you can make is giving birth in water. So if your facility offers a tub birth, do it. I love it. Now, if you're getting epidural, you can't do that. But however, water births have been known to be as effective as epidurals for pain control.

I almost got to have a water birth when I was pregnant with Gavin. That was the plan. They still did it at my facility. I was in the tub almost to the end and then I got a hair up my ass, which is called transition, the biggest hair up your ass, and I got out of the tub despite the fact that everyone was like, you wanted to do it in the tub.

I got out of the tub and went back to my room and gave birth. I was minutes away from having that baby and he was my biggest baby. I could have had him in the tub and I hit transition and I did not have a prepared coach. Which is why I have the coach class so they can know what to do because your coach has to coach you very differently during transition than any other time during [00:31:00] labor.

If my coach would have been a little more firm and reminded me that I was incredible and I could do it. And then I wanted to do it on the tub. I think I would have stayed in the tub, but I got it. I got a little moody and got myself out of there. Another thing that you can sort of prevent is controlled pushing during the delivery of the babysit.

That being said, this girl right here never did. But I didn't tear with anyone but my first. When the baby's head is coming out, it's best if it goes at little increments and stretches the perineum as it moves out. However, and you'll understand me, come back and say, Yep, Trish, I gotcha on that one. When the baby's head is stretching out your perineum, the last thing you're thinking about, Oh, is let me do this nice and slow.

So that I don't tear. What you're thinking actually is get the freaking heck out of me right now. And how quick can I do it? So if you want to push the baby out nice and slow [00:32:00] and steady, then you may not tear. Me personally, I don't give a darn about tearing. So come back and let me know how it goes for you.

If you have an epidural, this is something you are more likely able to do without really knowing that you're doing it. So just listen to your body. If you have an epidural, listen to your nurse, she's going to coach you and guide you. I don't want you, holding your breath, counting to 10 or all of that.

Just listen to your body, do what you need to do. Even if you have an epidural, you can still listen to your body. I highly recommend That you, like I said, take a birth course, take a class that teaches you all the positions so that you can practice during pregnancy so that. You know, I can't tell you 90 percent of the women that I've delivered.

I'm like, okay, you're complete and baby's low Let's start pushing. Did you take a class? Do you know pushing positions? No And I'm there by the bed with my hand under what my [00:33:00] patient referred to as my knee pit holding my knee up in the air showing them how to hold how to push and It's very awkward and it's not the best time that's conducive for learning.

So practice while you're pregnant The best thing that you guys can do, and I've said this over and over again, is education, good nutrition, but let's also talk about some exercises.

My golden nugget of an exercise that I recommend to all my students. Do a deep squat. I'm not talking about like with a barbell, like a big old giant man. I'm talking about Like a yoga squat. So Google yoga squat. I'll have a graphic in the show notes to show you what I'm talking about. When you do a deep squat during pregnancy, I want you to start.

I don't care where you're at. As long as you don't have any kind of high risk for preterm labor or something wackadoodle going on. If you do talk to your provider, always remember, I'm not giving you medical advice, I'm just giving you educational advice. You always want [00:34:00] to clear it. But do a yoga squat. I want you to start right now, wherever you are.

If you're a week away or you're eight weeks pregnant. This is like an all over wonderful thing to do to prepare yourself for birth. This is something my mama told me. My mama's from Kentucky. She's very southern. She's told me a lot of weird things. But this one she did tell me. And she happened to be completely right.

She told me to do everything squatting. She told me to hand mop my floors with a rag and to watch TV, to read a book squatting, and even though I was very young, which is, we'll talk about later. I actually listened to my mom on this and did it and pushed incredibly. So deep squats, they prepare your, your perineum.

They prepare your pelvic floor muscles. They prepare your abdominal muscles. They prepare your thighs, all the things you need. for pushing and birth. So what I tell my girls inside my private community, we have a [00:35:00] membership community for moms, and then we have our birth classes for labor and birth education, and all my students are in my community, and then on top of that it's open to the public for very low priced price.

We have all sorts of classes and all sorts of fun things planned inside of there. Tons of support. And what I tell my girls is challenge themselves. So when you start, it's going to be a little harder, build it up. But I want you get to a point where you take something that you love doing.

Like, let's say you love scrolling Instagram and looking at all my new content. Hopefully. Or you love watching some binge show on Netflix. I want you to get to a point where you only watch it or only scroll or only do that thing while in a deep squat. That'll be your challenge. And build up your time.

Build it up to about 30 minutes a couple times a day if you can. You'll be so pleasantly surprised. I always recommend leaning against something or being near something that you can fall back on [00:36:00] because, girl, your center of gravity is going to get worse and worse throughout your pregnancy. This is something that absolutely will help you prepare for birth.

Get moving. Go on walks. Do all the things. Now, another thing that can help you is being confident and being prepared so that you won't be fearful or tense during birth. Tension leads to, or fear leads to tension. Tension leads to tight muscles. Tight muscles, when you're tense and you're fearful, you're going to build up more lactic acid, so that also leads to more pain, but it also leads to worse tearing.

So, remember. Be calm when you go into labor, have a shift in the mindset, empower yourself, own your birth story. Tell yourself how powerful you are and how amazing you are. You can go into your birth without the [00:37:00] fear, I promise. You've got this. Do not be afraid of tearing.

we know what a vaginal tear is and you're probably a little bit anxious still and a little, uh, not too happy about your vaginal tearing. I get that. The main deal again of this episode, this entire podcast episode, is that you have to confront those birth fears head on. Let go of the fear of tearing.

We fear the unknown. We fear a threat. Birth is not a threat. Tearing is not a threat. It's what your body is supposed to do. It's the amazing way your body will make room for your baby. The one you built right there inside of you and the one who has to come out. The one that you've probably been saying, get the heck out of me.

Part of that coming out is your vagina stretching and maybe Stretching a little more to make room. [00:38:00] So even though we went over some ways that you can prevent it and ways that you can, or choices that you can make, the real deal is this. You can't Actually, 100 percent prevent it. If your baby needs more room, girl, it's gonna take it.

Just like if your baby needs a little more nutrients while you're pregnant, they're gonna take it. That's just the way it's supposed to happen. That's how our body works. And it's pretty damn incredible. So get rid of this fear, girl. Another part of this, before we end this episode, is that I know y'all are worried about your vagina stretching at all.

But your vagina is perfect. It's not gonna stay stretched out. It's gonna go back. It was made to go back. But again, good nutrition, good movement, good fluid intake. Increase that fluid intake. Drink that water, girl. Dehydration is a biatch when you're pregnant. [00:39:00] You are in control of what you're in control of.

Let go of the rest. Don't worry. Hey mama, I hope you enjoyed this episode of the birth experience with labor nurse mama. If you loved it as much as I did, then head over to labor nurse mama dot com forward slash tearing and And check out all the information and all the resources that I have together in one spot just for you, including a free Taring guide that you can download right now.

And let me know how much you love this episode by subscribing to my podcast and writing a review. I would love to hear from you. Have a fantastic day and I'll see you next Friday.