The subconscious mind stores all conscious, unconscious splits,
Speaker:all ratios of perception that are imbalanced,
Speaker:the superconscious mind stores all ratios of perceptions that are balanced.
Speaker:That's a topic that you probably have run around in your head,
Speaker:how do I reprogram my mind?
Speaker:But let's take it and go down the rabbit hole with it.
Speaker:Every time you get a stimulus from the outside world,
Speaker:you experience that through what are called receptors.
Speaker:You have eyesight receptors, audio receptors,
Speaker:smell receptors, taste receptors, tactile feeling receptors.
Speaker:In fact, you have many, many other receptors, temperature receptors,
Speaker:pain receptors, pressure receptors.
Speaker:Each of these receptors stimulate a nerve receptor by
Speaker:the stimulus that you have, and that causes what is called a graded potential,
Speaker:which is goes down the nerve of the receptor.
Speaker:And if it hits a certain threshold it gets into an action potential and
Speaker:stimulates another nerve and that cascading series
Speaker:cord and up the brain and into the higher areas or lower areas,
Speaker:depending on the threshold. If it's subthreshold,
Speaker:you may not even be conscious of it. If it's above threshold,
Speaker:you may all of a sudden become aware of it. All
Speaker:the information that goes in there,
Speaker:as it goes up into the brain and up the spinal cord,
Speaker:it gets associated with other nerves.
Speaker:And those can contain experiences that you've had
Speaker:previously that get associated with the stimulus.
Speaker:If you've had,
Speaker:if you've gone out on a date and every time you've gone on a date,
Speaker:it's a guy with dark hair. And you find out that every time you go out there,
Speaker:he becomes a certain erratic behavior.
Speaker:And you associate that with dark haired guys. <Laugh>,
Speaker:you're going to have associations with that in your response to that stimulus is
Speaker:now going to be a perception of avoid.
Speaker:If you've had an experience of a bunch of nice pleasureful,
Speaker:pleasant things with the dark haired guy, you may associate with something, 'oh,
Speaker:I like that, It's attractive,
Speaker:I can trust that.' So every experience that you have
Speaker:that from these stimuli of all these receptors go into the brain
Speaker:and summate into experiences
Speaker:through what they call associative, interneurons, and these interneurons,
Speaker:the greater the number of neurons as you go up in the brain,
Speaker:the greater the number, and as you go down in the spinal cord,
Speaker:there are very few. In fact, you've probably heard of a mono synaptic reflex,
Speaker:where somebody hits your knee with a reflex hammer and you just stimulate.
Speaker:That's something that you don't have any option over, stimulus, response.
Speaker:And so if something comes up in your life that you have a stimulus response,
Speaker:that means you don't really have any control over it.
Speaker:But as you go up into the brain, you get more and more interneurons,
Speaker:more and more associations made.
Speaker:And the probability with the greater sample side of
Speaker:50. That means that there's advantages and disadvantages to that stimulus.
Speaker:And you're more active, not reactive,
Speaker:because you have more options on how to perceive that stimulus.
Speaker:And so you're free to decide to do something or not.
Speaker:There's a area of the brain called the amygdala,
Speaker:and anywhere from the amygdala kind of down into the hindbrain is where we
Speaker:react before we think. And anywhere from that area up in the cortex area,
Speaker:we think before react. So if we have a stimulus,
Speaker:the higher we go in the brain,
Speaker:the higher the probability of thinking before reacting.
Speaker:And the more it's down in the primitive part of the brain,
Speaker:the more we react without thinking.
Speaker:So every time you have a stimulus that comes in,
Speaker:if you have had nothing but positive response,
Speaker:or nothing but negative response from previous experiences,
Speaker:you'll keep in the primitive part of the brain,
Speaker:because it will be registered as something to seek, prey,
Speaker:or something to avoid, predator. And you'll have an impulse towards,
Speaker:or you'll have an instinct way.
Speaker:So anytime you've had a stimulus through those receptors that have come in,
Speaker:that you've associated only positive with, no negative, or only negative with,
Speaker:no positive,
Speaker:in the lower areas of the brain where there's less interneurons and
Speaker:associations, the more reactive you're going to be,
Speaker:the less you're going to think about it, faster you're going to respond.
Speaker:And those perceptions that have been stored in an imbalanced way
Speaker:are called the subconscious mind.
Speaker:The subconscious mind stores all previously imbalanced,
Speaker:dissociations that you perceived about things. For instance,
Speaker:let's say you meet somebody and you're infatuated with them,
Speaker:and you're conscious of the upsides, unconscious of the downsides,
Speaker:you're ignoring the downsides.
Speaker:You have a form of ignorance and you're not seeing the whole individual,
Speaker:you're just seeing the upsides and you infatuate.
Speaker:So now you have an impulse towards, like a prey you want to consume it.
Speaker:And some of you've been in a situation you want to consume that person you're
Speaker:infatuated with, literally.
Speaker:And you also could meet somebody that you resent that you're conscious of the
Speaker:downsides or unconscious of the upsides.
Speaker:And now you're going to have an instinct to want to avoid them because they
Speaker:represent predator and you want stay away from that, that's danger.
Speaker:You have an impulse towards prey in an instinct away from predator,
Speaker:seek and avoid. As a result of that,
Speaker:those are associations that are made that now, if anybody reminds you of that,
Speaker:secondary associations or you see a stimulus that
Speaker:that, you immediately avoid or seek. And so again,
Speaker:systems 1 thinking comes in where you're just reacting before you're thinking,
Speaker:and it's a survival response for, you know, prey or predator,
Speaker:seeking or avoiding.
Speaker:And the subconscious mind stores all impulses and instincts,
Speaker:all conscious and unconscious splits,
Speaker:all imbalanced conscious and unconscious states,
Speaker:that are part of the more primitive part of the brain,
Speaker:where there's not as many associations for fast responses for survival.
Speaker:And so when people have their subconscious mind running their life,
Speaker:it's a survival mode and it's a subcortical area of
Speaker:being involved.
Speaker:And it's basically sitting there with seeking or avoiding mechanisms.
Speaker:And so you're basically an automaton reacting to these misperceptions
Speaker:and the associations you made previously and you're living sort of in the past
Speaker:through trial and error from your experiences. But,
Speaker:what happens if all of a sudden a stimulus comes in and it gets all the way into
Speaker:the higher part of the brain where the sample side of associative neuron,
Speaker:interneurons are there and you have a mean distribution of pain and pleasure,
Speaker:positive and negative, a seek and avoid,
Speaker:what happens is that most advanced part of the brain,
Speaker:the medial prefrontal cortex and prefrontal cortex is sometimes called
Speaker:the executive center, and what it does is it stops, assesses it,
Speaker:looks at it, looks at the ratio, balances it,
Speaker:and mitigates the polarities to it,
Speaker:calms it down and governs it and takes and dampens the extremes of
Speaker:polarity and make you think before you react. Now, the executive center,
Speaker:every time you balance out your perceptions and govern yourself,
Speaker:I call that the superconscious mind. You have the subconscious mind,
Speaker:which is systems 1 thinking where you're emotional and you're reacting before
Speaker:thinking. And the superconscious mind, sometimes called the transcendental mind,
Speaker:or the spiritual conscious mind, it's got many names,
Speaker:or the advanced part of the brain, forebrain,
Speaker:where you're now having a mean distribution of positive and negative
Speaker:associations,
Speaker:because of all the neurons and all the experiences and they've been balanced
Speaker:over time.
Speaker:Because in your life you have events in your life you think are terrible,
Speaker:and then a day, a week, a month, a year, five years later, you find out, oh,
Speaker:there's some terrific in it. And there's things you think is terrific,
Speaker:and then you find out over a day, week, month, a year,
Speaker:you find out some downsides to it.
Speaker:And so you accumulate in the highest part of the brain where the most amount of
Speaker:associative interneurons are, you accumulate a balanced orientation,
Speaker:the mean distribution of polarities.
Speaker:And so therefore you are able to objectively perceive something,
Speaker:instead of subjectively bias things with an opinion and a quick response.
Speaker:For survival, you need that quick response, but for thrival, you don't.
Speaker:If you want to master your life, the survival mentality is not where it's at.,
Speaker:because the external world is going to keep running here.
Speaker:All stimuli are going to run you. You're going to be extrinsically driven.
Speaker:And you'll be an automaton reacting to all these stimuli out there that you
Speaker:don't have much balanced view of.
Speaker:The subconscious mind stores all conscious unconscious splits,
Speaker:all ratios of perception that are imbalanced.
Speaker:The superconscious mind stores all ratios of perceptions that are balanced.
Speaker:So love and wisdom, philosophia,
Speaker:the love of wisdom and the wisdom of love, are in the forebrain.
Speaker:And you might say ignorance, phobias and philias,
Speaker:fantasies and nightmares, pleasures and pains,
Speaker:seeking and avoiding mechanisms, which are extrinsically driven,
Speaker:are in the lower parts of the body,
Speaker:mainly in the amygdala down into the hindbrain and spinal cord.
Speaker:So if something is really black or white and it's just terrible,
Speaker:absolutely bad,
Speaker:your brain is going to fire off and you're going to react before you can think.
Speaker:We've all been infatuated with somebody,
Speaker:really infatuated and found ourselves not able to govern ourselves and did
Speaker:things we went, 'ooh,
Speaker:didn't expect that today.' Or been highly resentful and got into rage reactions
Speaker:and really reacted and couldn't govern yourself.
Speaker:That's the subconscious mind running around.
Speaker:The superconscious mind is stable. It's not volatile.
Speaker:It's poised and balanced, not vicissitude,
Speaker:not going all over the place with emotional reactions. It's objective,
Speaker:not subjective. It sees both sides, not one side.
Speaker:It has relativity instead of absolutes. The gradation,
Speaker:we have a gradation like a dimmer switch, from the higher part of the brain,
Speaker:it dims down and governs it.
Speaker:If you were to stimulate a nerve reflex and the advanced part of the
Speaker:brain was not governing down all the way down below,
Speaker:you'd get a spastic reflex called Babinsky reflex. But if you have a cortical,
Speaker:a cortical control from the advanced part of the brain doing it,
Speaker:you have a fine motor control.
Speaker:You can't play a violin from the stimulus response down below,
Speaker:but you can from mastering the part of the brain,
Speaker:that's actually involved in governance, to make fine motor skills,
Speaker:to be able to govern those, those very subtle systems.
Speaker:They're not firing all or none. They're firing with gradations.
Speaker:So when you're able to see both sides of an event,
Speaker:when you first infatuate with somebody you eventually discover, well,
Speaker:they're not what you thought.
Speaker:And eventually you find out they got things you like and things you dislike.
Speaker:And the things that you resent, you find out well, they're not what you thought.
Speaker:They have things, you know, you see that you like after time.
Speaker:Eventually you get to discover that the person you love has got both sides.
Speaker:And therefore, when you're actually loving something,
Speaker:you're able to see both sides simultaneously. Wilhelm Wundt,
Speaker:who was the father of experimental science around 130 years ago,
Speaker:said simultaneous contrast gets the executive center.
Speaker:and the superconscious awareness. Sequential contrast,
Speaker:where oscillating between emotions and going through a gyration like a bipolar
Speaker:response, is when you're in systems 1 thinking,
Speaker:you're emotional responding and you're in survival. Now,
Speaker:most people don't want to live in survival unless there's a real emergency,
Speaker:then thank God you got that kind of response.
Speaker:I'm very grateful to have that ability to do that if a truck's about to hit me
Speaker:or I'm about to get thrown from a horse or something,
Speaker:you need to be able to react and respond quickly.
Speaker:Or if somebody comes and bees about to sting or snakes about to bite you or
Speaker:something, you need those responses. But 99% of our life,
Speaker:99.9% of our life is not that extreme.
Speaker:And so we want to live in our executive center and be reasonable and take
Speaker:command. When you live in your executive center,
Speaker:you're the master of your destiny. You're living by design.
Speaker:You're choosing what you're going to do.
Speaker:You mitigate the risk and rewards and you see both of them simultaneously.
Speaker:But if you're not,
Speaker:you're reacting and most people are highly reactive and they meet
Speaker:somebody. When you go shopping,
Speaker:if you don't have an agenda and a pre-planned agenda with foresight,
Speaker:you're going to impulse buy because you're going to have sales people trying to
Speaker:stimulate you and get you to be responded.
Speaker:The mass media is constantly bombarding you with extremes of polarities
Speaker:in order to get you to respond. Politicians,
Speaker:religious leaders are trying to get you to respond with heaven or hell or
Speaker:pleasure or pain or peace and war, the polarities.
Speaker:And as long as you are vulnerable to that,
Speaker:then you're an automaton reacting to people outside you and any area of your
Speaker:life you're not governing in yourself, other people are running.
Speaker:Any area of your life you don't take command and empower, by having both sides,
Speaker:that's what I mean by empowerment, you're going to be run by somebody else. See,
Speaker:if you're infatuated with somebody and you put them on a pedestal,
Speaker:you'll minimize yourself,
Speaker:you're too humble to admit what you see in them is inside you and so you're
Speaker:disowning a part and that's a disempowerment.
Speaker:If you're resenting somebody and you exaggerate yourself
Speaker:admit what you see in them is inside you, you got a disowned part,
Speaker:a disempowerment. Anytime you disown parts and judge somebody,
Speaker:your impulses and instincts, your amygdala, your hindbrain,
Speaker:are all going to fire off and you're going to be in survival mode.
Speaker:Your autonomic nervous system is going to be into eating and rest and digest or
Speaker:fight or flight responses. And the more polarized you are,
Speaker:the more infatuated you are, the more you fear it's loss,
Speaker:the more resentful you are to something, the more you fear it's gain,
Speaker:the more you live in fear and distress.
Speaker:There's only two forms of fears and distresses in your life.
Speaker:The fear of loss of that which you seek and the fear of gain of that what you're
Speaker:trying to avoid. Every fear that you ever faced is one of those.
Speaker:And so when you're in survival 1 mode and you're emotionally reacting and you're
Speaker:letting the stimulus outside you, you have an evoked potential,
Speaker:not an actualized spontaneous potential where you're actually thinking and
Speaker:planning yourself. So that's what happens when you're in the,
Speaker:you might say systems 1 thinking, you're fast responding for survival,
Speaker:but you're basically not in governance of your life.
Speaker:And so your misperceptions of all those lopsided perceptions are running your
Speaker:life. But if you balance out those perceptions,
Speaker:you automatically bring blood, glucose, and oxygen up into the forebrain.
Speaker:If you live by highest priority,
Speaker:what's been found is everybody's got a hierarchy of values,
Speaker:whenever you're living by your highest priority and you're living by real,
Speaker:really the most important things in your life, the blood, glucose,
Speaker:and oxygen goes into the forebrain and stimulus goes up in the forebrain,
Speaker:gets associated and has more balanced, reasonable responses.
Speaker:And you think before you react and you're now governed,
Speaker:and you're somebody that people want to be magnetized to be around because you
Speaker:have your life together.
Speaker:Whoever is demonstrating and exemplifying mastery draws and magnetizes people
Speaker:and opportunity to them. But if they're emotionally reacting, watch out,
Speaker:unpredictability, uncertainty, and people don't like to be around uncertainties
Speaker:and unpredictabilities, it's frightening sometime,
Speaker:and they're going to create a chain reaction. Whatever emotions you have,
Speaker:you create chain reactions. If you see extreme, you know,
Speaker:sympathy or extreme anger on television, you can get all engaged in it,
Speaker:it can run you. That's what the media is,
Speaker:what they're trying to do to get you engaged, to watch their show,
Speaker:to sell commercial time.
Speaker:But if you actually are poised and present and balanced and purposeful,
Speaker:because when you're living by highest value you're more objective and neutral,
Speaker:you're purposeful, you have self-governance, self-mastery,
Speaker:and you exemplify what's possible as a human being and you grow your potential,
Speaker:because nothing's missing in your life.
Speaker:You're not too proud or too humble to admit what you see in others inside you.
Speaker:You embrace both sides of yourself.
Speaker:How you going to love yourself if you're trying to get rid of one side and only
Speaker:trying to get the other side?
Speaker:Trying to get rid of half of yourself and trying to be only one sided is futile
Speaker:and trying to change other people to live in your values or trying you trying to
Speaker:live in other people's values is futile.
Speaker:So systems 1 thinking is there for survival, but it's not thrival,
Speaker:it's not mastery.
Speaker:So for all these years I've been watching people do this and I see people have
Speaker:struggles with that and they have futilities and frustrations and they
Speaker:disempower their life.
Speaker:And then they wonder why the world's running them and they become victims of
Speaker:history, not masters of destiny. And they have false attribution bias.
Speaker:They blame the things on the outside and exaggerate the negatives in
Speaker:something and blame things on the outside you know, exaggerate the positives.
Speaker:And as a result of that,
Speaker:they're looking for something on the outside to save them.
Speaker:And these lopsided perceptions are there.
Speaker:If you go and you're highly infatuated and you got an addiction to somebody or
Speaker:highly resentful and have a subdiction for something,
Speaker:you go for therapy or go for somebody,
Speaker:or come to me or somebody to try to balance it out.
Speaker:And because you want control of your life again, because you've lost control.
Speaker:And if it's really polarized,
Speaker:you end up with bipolar condition and even dissociative conditions and sometimes
Speaker:delusions and schizoid behaviors, if it's really extreme.
Speaker:And that's what happens when you're in survival,
Speaker:it can be extreme in order to capture prey and avoid predator,
Speaker:you've got to accelerate the adrenaline and cortisol in order to really capture
Speaker:the prey and do it.
Speaker:So we really subjectively bias our realities when we're living there.
Speaker:But the second we ask quality questions,
Speaker:see the quality of our life's based on the quality of the questions we ask.
Speaker:And a quality question is one that brings balance to the mind.
Speaker:Pythagorus said this in his times, and Galen in his times,
Speaker:and Asclepius in his times and throughout the ages,
Speaker:almost all great minds knew this.
Speaker:The quality of your life is based on the quality of the questions you ask.
Speaker:Every time you have a positive without a negative or a negative without
Speaker:positive, you have an ionic state.
Speaker:And all ions are looking for their opposites to balance the chemistry.
Speaker:And your brain has a homeostatic mechanism trying to balance its neurochemistry,
Speaker:trying to balance its electronics. In the more primitive part of the brain
Speaker:you have synapses that work by chemistry.
Speaker:Then you go in the higher associations, you start working by electronics.
Speaker:Then you go even further, you have photonics.
Speaker:And finally at the very highest levels, you have literally entanglement,
Speaker:which is the fastest system.
Speaker:And that's there to conquer and overrule the impulses and instincts of the
Speaker:systems 1 thinking. So,
Speaker:if you ask questions that balance your mind,
Speaker:you liberate yourself from the emotional baggage that's stored in the
Speaker:subconscious mind. The subconscious mind stores all those imbalances,
Speaker:all those lopsided associations,
Speaker:all those things that you don't have control over in your life.
Speaker:And those can come from previous experiences, all
Speaker:previous splits in conscious and unconscious awareness,
Speaker:things that we've injected into our lives by subordinates,
Speaker:subordination to outer authorities.
Speaker:If we meet a mother or father or preacher or teacher or somebody on the outside
Speaker:that gives us a moral hypocrisy that we're supposed to live by
Speaker:and then we can't, we beat ourselves up.
Speaker:All those are stored in the subconscious mind,
Speaker:sometimes called limiting beliefs or sabotaging components.
Speaker:But the second we balance out our mind,
Speaker:we don't have the phobias or the fantasies,
Speaker:and we automatically have governance and we're now consciously aware and live by
Speaker:design. Many years ago,
Speaker:I started to ask how do I take a person out of their emergency response system,
Speaker:danger response system sometimes, or fantasy response system,
Speaker:and how do we get them to self mastery?
Speaker:That's been my dream since I was literally 18 years old.
Speaker:How do I get an individual to self mastery?
Speaker:How do I help them break through those limitations of perception
Speaker:and get a more of a mean distribution and see both sides of things, aware.
Speaker:As Wilhelm Wundt says, that's the individual that's fully conscious.
Speaker:See if you're conscious of something and unconscious of something,
Speaker:you're not fully conscious.
Speaker:When you see both sides simultaneously you have mindfulness, full consciousness,
Speaker:sometimes called enlightenment.
Speaker:And you have a homeostasis and balance in the mind.
Speaker:And your autonomics are balanced. You have resilience, adaptability,
Speaker:heart rate variability is enhanced. I mean, the physiological,
Speaker:almost all the symptoms in your body that you face are feedback mechanisms to
Speaker:try to balance your mind. Your brain is a homeostatic mechanism.
Speaker:It was basically Walter Cannon wrote a book called 'The Wisdom of the Body' and
Speaker:showed how the entire body is basically meant for homeostasis, balance.
Speaker:No matter what the perturbing events on there,
Speaker:the stimulus from those receptors are, you can maintain a balance.
Speaker:So in order to do that, you can ask quality questions.
Speaker:So I developed a system, which I call the Demartini Method,
Speaker:which I teach in the Breakthrough Experience, on how to do exactly that,
Speaker:how to go from system 1 to system 2 thinking.
Speaker:How to go from the subconscious to the superconscious,
Speaker:how to go from reacting to proacting,
Speaker:how to sit there and being something that we're emotionally exaggerating ourself
Speaker:with pride or shame or living in infatuation resentments
Speaker:and we're gyrating all over the place and run externally,
Speaker:to be able to live spontaneously inspired from within and see both sides and
Speaker:not react, but actually proact, as a master,
Speaker:instead of some mass conscious reaction that sensationalism brings.
Speaker:And that's asking question, for instance, let's say in the Demartini Method,
Speaker:let me give you some samples of the questions. Let's say you have something,
Speaker:you see that your mother ridicules you and criticizes you or
Speaker:something, or maybe your spouse does that. Your spouse is criticizing you.
Speaker:It asks the question, what specific trait, action,
Speaker:or inaction do you perceive this individual, my spouse,
Speaker:displaying or demonstrating that I dislike or despise or hate most?
Speaker:And I write down 'verbally criticizes me' and the content of
Speaker:that is verbal criticism, the context is about the way I'm raising the children.
Speaker:Great. Now you ask the next question.
Speaker:Now you've defined what it is that you're reacting to that's been stacked up
Speaker:through associations in your mind, somebody criticizing,
Speaker:you've associated pain from that,
Speaker:and you want to avoid that and withdraw from the man you love,
Speaker:and by the way,
Speaker:and you're most likely doing something that's challenging his values,
Speaker:or you're somehow arrogant and need being brought back down,
Speaker:back into authenticity, or he wouldn't be doing that.
Speaker:It's part of a mechanism of bringing you into balance as well as you learning
Speaker:how to balance yourself. And by the way,
Speaker:if you don't balance yourself and learn the tools I'm about to show you here,
Speaker:you're going to end up having to be run from the outside world.
Speaker:People that don't listen to their physiology and psychology and govern
Speaker:themselves from within,
Speaker:have to be run by politics and religion on the outside to govern them.
Speaker:That's where the moral hypocrisies and polarities come in,
Speaker:which actually are counterproductive.
Speaker:So what happens is you go in there and you now ask the question, okay me,
Speaker:go to a moment where and when I've perceived myself
Speaker:that same behavior. In Romans 2 in the biblical writings,
Speaker:it basically showed that we never judge another person unless it's representing
Speaker:a part of us that we're too humble or too proud to admit we have,
Speaker:but we have what we see. And when we're judging them,
Speaker:we're judging a part of ourselves stored in the subconscious mind,
Speaker:it's causing impulse and instincts. That's why we're avoiding it.
Speaker:So if all of a sudden you go in there and go, where do I do that?
Speaker:And you stack up where it was, when it was, who'd you do it to,
Speaker:and who perceived you that way. Where it was, when it was,
Speaker:who perceived you doing that? And who did you do it to?
Speaker:And you do it until the quantity of when you've done it and the quality of what
Speaker:you've done is equal to what they've done,
Speaker:and you level the playing field and you no longer have them down on this pit and
Speaker:you up on this pride mode, but you kind of bring your pride down, because,
Speaker:oh my God, I've done that, I've done the same thing, who am I to judged them?
Speaker:And all of a sudden I realize, Hmm, I've done the same thing.
Speaker:It calms down the reaction. It takes you out of the amygdala and the hindbrain,
Speaker:and puts you back in the executive center. Then if you go and ask the question,
Speaker:go to a moment where,
Speaker:and when you perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating this behavior,
Speaker:this verbal criticism, about the way I'm raising the children,
Speaker:and now ask the question, at that moment when they verbally criticize me,
Speaker:and from that moment till now, what are the benefits of their verbal criticism?
Speaker:At first, you're going to say, no,
Speaker:there is none because of those memories in your past stored in your subconscious
Speaker:mind, you're going to protect yourself.
Speaker:And so you're going to subjectively bias it and not look objectively and see the
Speaker:upsides to it. And as long as you're seeing the downsides, no upsides,
Speaker:you don't have a balanced mind.
Speaker:You're not mindful and you're going to react instead of act.
Speaker:So then if you go in there and ask, so what are the benefits to that? Oh,
Speaker:well it's made me stop and look at what I'm doing. Am I over nurturing the kids?
Speaker:Am I over supporting them? Am I making them dependent?
Speaker:Am I doing too much for them?
Speaker:Am I robbing them of accountability and responsibility?
Speaker:Maybe what that person, my husband is saying has actually got some merit to it.
Speaker:Am I,
Speaker:am I justifying my wounds from my past and I'm overcompensating because I didn't
Speaker:see my mommy there and so I want to make sure I'm there for them and I'm now
Speaker:smothering the kid and maybe my husband is playing the balancing act,
Speaker:an androgynous balancing out to make sure I don't.
Speaker:And I stop and I look at the benefits of what's going on,
Speaker:the way I'm raising the kids.
Speaker:Or maybe it's going to make me stop and look at it and he goes, no,
Speaker:he's just in his mode that day and he's out letting his pressure.
Speaker:But it allows you to look at it and see the upsides to it.
Speaker:And once the balance of the upsides balance the downsides,
Speaker:there's nothing to react to.
Speaker:And you're immediately back up in your executive center and you're now
Speaker:functioning. And now you know how to respond to the husband.
Speaker:Thank you for your feedback. I appreciate it. Made me stop and self reflect.
Speaker:Made me look at what I was doing and maybe at times I'm over protecting and
Speaker:nurturing and over supporting them and making them dependent and not,
Speaker:and I'm robbing them of accountabilities. And other times I realize that no,
Speaker:you're just reactive and I'm now learning how to discern which one is which,
Speaker:and make sure that I'm more aware,
Speaker:so I'm not reacting to you and judging you and I'm not reacting and judging me.
Speaker:So thank you. When you see the benefits of that,
Speaker:all of a sudden they're equal to the drawbacks, there is no reaction.
Speaker:You've got an executive function, you got systems 2 firing away.
Speaker:And now you're thinking before you react.
Speaker:And then you could go further and you could go now go to a moment where and when
Speaker:I perceive myself doing this and how did it benefit the people I did and to the
Speaker:people who perceived me doing it?
Speaker:And I clear out all my shame and all my guilt from all the past experiences.
Speaker:Cause if I've got guilt and shame of the past, that's running my life,
Speaker:it's going to make me react to people who remind me of it.
Speaker:And I'm going to be resenting all these people out there that have nothing to do
Speaker:with them.
Speaker:It's about me judging myself and they're bringing it into my life to make sure I
Speaker:don't leave it there hanging there.
Speaker:Every event in your life is trying to get you to clear the subconscious baggage
Speaker:and to turn it into superconscious fuel,
Speaker:and liberate yourself so you can love yourself.
Speaker:We all want to be loved for who we are,
Speaker:but we're not going to be loved for who we are as long as we're sitting there in
Speaker:systems 1, we're going to be reacting,
Speaker:we're going to be projecting our values onto others and expecting them to live
Speaker:in our values,
Speaker:which is futile or living and trying to live in other people's values,
Speaker:which is futile. But if you go in there and then you ask this next question,
Speaker:now go to a moment when you perceived this same individual,
Speaker:doing the exact opposite behavior. When did they actually praise me?
Speaker:Cause if I think they're always criticizing me,
Speaker:I'll react and avoid them and I'll now undermine my relationship.
Speaker:If I see that sometimes they challenge me, sometimes they support me. I go,
Speaker:you know what, when I do things that challenge their values, they criticize me.
Speaker:When I do things that support their values, they praise me and I can see that.
Speaker:And if I balance that I stop the labels.
Speaker:If I went another step further and asked another question;
Speaker:at that exact moment when they criticized me,
Speaker:who had me on a pedestal where it was puffing me up,
Speaker:that was making me arrogant and communicating in an
Speaker:make him have to react that way?
Speaker:We don't attract criticism unless we're puffed up and challenging somebody
Speaker:and they're bringing us back into authenticity.
Speaker:And if you stop and look at where was it and who was it that was playing the
Speaker:other, in your mind it could be virtual or real,
Speaker:but somebody's praising you in your head and you're puffed up that's why they're
Speaker:reacting to bring you back down.
Speaker:You don't attract criticism unless you need to be brought back into
Speaker:authenticity.
Speaker:And then you look at that and you realize that every time they're doing it,
Speaker:they're helping me be authentic.
Speaker:And now you appreciate them for playing their role in making sure you're
Speaker:authentic.
Speaker:And many times you had fantasies about your spouse is supposed to make you happy
Speaker:all the time. That's delusional.
Speaker:Your spouse is designed to help you become authentic.
Speaker:It's to help you to bring balance into your life,
Speaker:help you to be authentic and be able to love for who you are.
Speaker:Not for the fantasies you're holding on to.
Speaker:And many people come into relationships from Disney world and they come in with
Speaker:fantasies and that person, that spouse is there to help you balance it.
Speaker:And then you go to the next question, go to the moment where,
Speaker:and when they actually criticize you,
Speaker:and if they had praised you in that moment, the way you fantasized,
Speaker:what would been the drawback? Well you'd have perpetuated your illusion,
Speaker:been self righteous, not cleared out your own guilt to the past.
Speaker:You would've sat there and been a persona and a false persona instead of an
Speaker:authentic being.
Speaker:And you basically sit there and not realize that he's keeping you under his
Speaker:control by praising you all the time.
Speaker:And you're now becoming a juvenile dependent and not
Speaker:And you want to build a healthy relationship that's
Speaker:and independence, freedom and constraint, as they say.
Speaker:So if you ask those questions to an event that you think is terrible,
Speaker:when you're done, there's nothing there, except thank you I love you.
Speaker:And you can do that on the opposite side. When somebody's done and praising you,
Speaker:you can do that in reverse. It doesn't matter.
Speaker:There's nothing your mortal body can experience that your immortal soul,
Speaker:the state of unconditional love, can't love, by asking quality questions.
Speaker:And that's the reason why I teach the Demartini Method.
Speaker:The Demartini Method is a series of very precise, very scientific,
Speaker:reproducible questions that guarantee you going from systems 1 to systems 2 and
Speaker:move you from this emotional reactive state to the executive function,
Speaker:where you can master your life and pursue what it is that's your purpose and
Speaker:dream in life and be inspired spontaneously instead of
Speaker:outside,
Speaker:an automaton reacting to anything that's doing it and being purchasing and
Speaker:impulses at the stores and then overspending and then
Speaker:having bills at the end and emotional drama in your life,
Speaker:and where your disempowered in all areas of your life.
Speaker:And then having to be controlled and powered by other people.
Speaker:The Demartini Method is a science on how to re-empower your life.
Speaker:And to help you go from system 1 to systems 2 from the subconscious to the
Speaker:conscious, and to reprogram the subconsciously stored
Speaker:and get you out of the monosynaptic reflexes where you're reacting before you
Speaker:even think, and get you into your thinking mode,
Speaker:and help you realize there's a magnificent order in the universe. By the way,
Speaker:the word disorder means missing information,
Speaker:and order means all the information's at at hand.
Speaker:So when you ask those questions and see both sides and solve the questions and
Speaker:see the love,
Speaker:now you're back in order and you're in order and you're commanding the life.
Speaker:Whoever sees the order is the one that gives the orders and wakes up their
Speaker:leadership. You have the capacity to be a leader that way.
Speaker:In the Breakthrough Experience where I teach the Demartini Method and I teach
Speaker:about values on how to live by priority and how to delegate lower priority
Speaker:things,
Speaker:where you decrease the probably of causing these reactions and you live more
Speaker:masterfully and you use the tool on anything that causes emotional reaction so
Speaker:you stabilize yourself, you move in the path of mastery.
Speaker:And it teaches you how and doing the method you can take people off pedestals
Speaker:and out of pits, because as long as you put people on pedestals,
Speaker:you're going to inject their values. As long as you put them in pits,
Speaker:you're going to project your values and you're going to be caught in subjective
Speaker:biases all day long. There's no reason for that.
Speaker:You can come to the Breakthrough Experience, learn the Demartini Method,
Speaker:learn how to prioritize your life and determine your values and live by priority
Speaker:and expand your game.
Speaker:And that's why I want people to do the Breakthrough Experience because I know
Speaker:what I'm describing here is where I teach people how to transform that systems 1
Speaker:to systems 2, that subconscious to superconscious.
Speaker:And you don't want to sit there and just do little affirmations and little
Speaker:visualizations only. You know,
Speaker:some people have a fantasy that they say something that's positive all the time
Speaker:they're going to end up being always positive. Well,
Speaker:I guarantee that's not going to last and it's not as powerful.
Speaker:But articulating specific balanced terminologies and
Speaker:balanced visions that do,
Speaker:which I teach in the Breakthrough Experience on how
Speaker:But you have to be objective and not set up fantasy yourself.
Speaker:People set up these fantasy ideas about how to change their subconscious mind
Speaker:that are transient at best and aren't really real.
Speaker:I'm interested in helping you master how your brain works,
Speaker:master how your life works so you can master your mind so you can master your
Speaker:life. That's what I'm interested in.
Speaker:That's why I teach people the Demartini Method and the Breakthrough Experience.
Speaker:That's why I do these little programs every week.
Speaker:So if you're interested in doing that and would like to take your subconscious
Speaker:mind and breakthrough to the superconscious state,
Speaker:or Satori, or enlightenment, or liberation, it's got many names,
Speaker:or Christ awareness if you're a Christian, or the Buddhist enlightenment,
Speaker:whatever name you want to give it,
Speaker:I just call it aware state or full conscious mind.
Speaker:If you do come to the Breakthrough Experience,
Speaker:I can help you master your mind and master your life.
Speaker:I've got all kinds of proven demonstrateable tools
Speaker:I've taught it for 33 and a half years. I've taught it 1,148 times.
Speaker:And I know it can make a difference in your life.
Speaker:I've asked people at the end of the program,
Speaker:how many have you learned something this weekend that,
Speaker:because it's a weekend two day program,
Speaker:how many have you learned something this weekend you could've gone your whole
Speaker:life and not learned if you hadn't have been here? Every hand goes up,
Speaker:every hand goes up each weekend.
Speaker:I promise you something that's not something you just
Speaker:or even at other seminars. It's something that I'm certain,
Speaker:it's my 50 years of research summarized and condensed down into something you
Speaker:can distill down that you can use the rest of your life.
Speaker:You will use this method,
Speaker:the Demartini Method from now on and the information there will be priceless and
Speaker:it'll be lasting. And you don't have to worry about whether it's solid.
Speaker:It will be demonstrated because you're going to do it and experience it
Speaker:firsthand. So come and join me at the Breakthrough Experience.
Speaker:Come and learn the Demartini Method.
Speaker:Come learn how to transform and take command of your
Speaker:as it's been called through the ages,
Speaker:and take command of your superconscious state.
Speaker:There's no reason why you can't live an inspired life.
Speaker:And that's what this program's about. That's what I'm dedicated to.
Speaker:And I love helping people do that. So I want to help you do that.
Speaker:So when you come get ready to work, <laugh>,
Speaker:it's not a rah rah thing standing on your chairs and singing stuff and that's
Speaker:all that. It's about learning how to master your life.
Speaker:It's practical and it'll be useful I promise you.
Speaker:So I look forward to seeing you there.
Speaker:I thank you for being with me at this little presentation today,
Speaker:I hope it was mind expanding and I look forward to next week when I do the next
Speaker:program, but come and join me at the Breakthrough Experience,
Speaker:that way I can help you do something extraordinary with your life.