Welcome to the Elevated Edit Podcast.

I'm your host, Blakely Ramsey, and the goal of this podcast is to discuss all things personal development, wellness, and the art of editing your life in an elevated way.

From mastering morning routines to mastering your mindset, we're going to sift through the noise and empower you to take elevated action.

Make sure you catch the show notes for all the details.

Enjoy the show.

Hello, and welcome back to the Elevated Edit Podcast.

Today we're going to talk about something that, based on conversations I have had with women recently in all seasons of life, I think is plaguing all of us.

And I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that thanks to technology, we have so many beautiful options.

But also thanks to technology, we have so many beautiful options.

And I truly believe that our digital world, in my opinion, is one of the best times to be alive.

I think that there is so much opportunity, so much unprecedented opportunity.

Anyone can accomplish anything that they want to accomplish.

And this is one of the first times in history that truly, like, the playing field is pretty level.

And with AI, it is going to increase even more, I believe.

I think it kind of gives everybody a fair chance and a level playing field, but with that comes way too many choices, way too many responsibilities that maybe shouldn't be responsibilities on top of our already busy plates.

Like, technology has just overloaded our brains.

It's given us too much information, and there is so much overwhelm.

Like, I feel like that is a resounding when you talk to women, because I've spent a lot of time with a lot of women in the last couple of weeks in large groups, and that is one of the main issues that you hear over and over again is, well, I'm so overwhelmed, or I've got so many options, or I've got so much to think about.

You know, there's.

It's just like an overload for everyone.

And so we're going to talk about my overwhelm journey and some things that I've done over the past year or so to help alleviate it a little bit.

There's definitely still times where I feel super overwhelmed.

Like, last week, I literally was so overwhelmed, I dropped the ball on something super major.

And I felt so terrible because I completely misread something that somebody sent me in a text.

Like, I read half the text and I did the thing that I thought they asked, and it was not the right thing.

And so I am here learning right along with you.

But I have definitely lessened my overwhelm over the last year.

And so I wanted to pass along some helpful tips for y'all as well.

But a little backstory in case this is the first time you have listened to the podcast, you're not really sure like what I'm talking about, what I'm referencing.

I have been in a very high paced career for about six years now and a few years ago I realized that I had impeccable systems for my clients.

My clients had a seamless experience as you know, much as was possible with other factors, but seamless experience, great communication, great email funnels, great, great marketing funnels, all the things, you know, my like third party vendors loved working with me because I was always like as soon as they needed something I got it to them and I was like on top of my phone and on top of my text and my emails.

Like email was always at zero and you know, all I had, all the work systems, it was great.

And then same for all of the boards that I sat on.

You know, people would ask me, hey, will you sit on this board?

Will you sit on that board?

We want you on this board.

All the things I was like, yes, yes, yes, all, all of it.

Sit, yes to all of it.

And it was all good and fine except that my life, my personal life systems were non existent.

I, I had no personal systems.

I would come home.

Well first off I would get off at like 7:38 at night and drive through somewhere and I would come home and lay on the couch and work some more and eat a cheeseburger from Wendy's.

And then I would take a shower and probably work some more.

And I would be texting and emailing this whole time, you know, because I'm the best and I've got to be great.

And then I would go to sleep, of course I'd sleep terribly because I was eating late, I was eating awful.

Like my diet was horrible.

And then I would wake up in the morning and I'd be in inflamed and I wouldn't work out or really do anything to pour back into myself.

It was straight to the email, straight to the text, straight to the, you know, wherever I need to go for whoever needs what.

I was doing all the things and so a God gift.

I had a slowdown season at my career and it really caused me to think of a lot of things and truly think, is this where I, I want my life to be in 10 years?

And when I asked myself that I was like, absolutely not.

Like I don't want my life to look anything like this in 10 years if I had the choice to choose.

And of course I realized I do have the choice to choose.

It's a hundred percent up to me where I'm at in 10 years because my daily thoughts and actions choose my life.

And So I, in 2023, I tried to do it on my own and I read all the books and you know, I, I did a pretty good job with my systems and my habits, but there was still some limiting belief there.

And so in 2024, I feel like I really dialed in on my personal systems and I had the answers in there the whole time.

But it took me hiring a coach to bring the systems out.

And she, the best part about her was that she didn't ever give me an answer.

She just asked the right questions to get me to the answer.

And I would not have figured any of this out if it weren't for her.

And through her, I also figured out that I'm really good at systems.

She was like, this is your gift, like this is your calling.

And it was so funny because I was not using systems systems at all in my personal life.

And it turns out I'm really good at them.

And now I love a system.

I love it, love it, love it.

And I love systems because they can be so simple.

I think when people think of systems that are like, oh, it's this complicated, like, I've got to have a CRM and I've got to have a, you know, all these integrations and all these third party apps, like.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Systems can be so simple and so tangible.

And we'll go deep into systems and habits in another episode.

But today I really want us to focus back on Overwhelm.

So that was my.

My.

A quick synopsis of my Overwhelm journey.

I have actually hired two coaches this year.

Quite a jump in the financial commitment.

But they already like have their, their finger on exactly what I need to be doing to improve.

And I personally really enjoy the accountability because I, I don't want someone who's always going to tell me what I want to hear.

I want somebody who's going to tell me what I need to hear.

So the problem with living in Overwhelm is that most of us are so busy.

We inherently know that we're overwhelmed, but we don't realize the true impact of what it's having on our lives.

This was definitely me.

I knew I was overwhelmed and I knew I was busy, but I didn't realize how overwhelmed that I was.

And it manifested itself in a lot of different ways in my life.

So first off, overthinking, as I mentioned at the beginning of this episode, I have a very vivid imagination.

And I know a lot of you overthinking girlies are listening as well, because I've talked to y'all about different podcast episodes where you were like, yep, that was me.

Our imagination can be a great thing.

We're creative.

We can come up with, like, problem solving solutions that others can't see.

But on the other hand, we can also imagine the absolute worst case scenario and then we can stress out about it even if it likely isn't going to happen.

And we can also, like, imagine a thousand ideas.

And so it's really hard for us to focus in on one and take action.

So that is one of the problems with overwhelm is when you are in that constant fight or flight, you are just constantly overthinking.

You're not ever, like, slowing your nervous system down enough to process your thoughts and think rationally.

It's just a constant stream of overthinking.

The second problem with living in overwhelm is that you end up wasting a lot, a lot, a lot of time without even realizing it.

Scrolling on social media is a big one.

I know when I was living in, like, my.

The height of my overwhelm, I would get, like, I would feel anxious and I would pick up my phone and scroll or I would, you know, I would know I would was about to have to make a phone call I didn't want to make or go visit someone I didn't want to visit or do something that, like, was going to be hard.

And I would pick up my phone and scroll and get that dopamine hit.

And I also spent a lot of so much time talking.

And I love to talk.

I just got home from a quiet retreat and it's funny because when I, I was headed to the retreat, my husband was like, you do realize that you can't talk at a quiet retreat.

But it was so fantastic.

Was wonderful, wonderful.

But what I, when I was in my, like, overwhelm season of life, I would use talking to people as a, oh, well, I was networking or, oh, well, I was talking about this or I was talking about the market.

But really I spent the majority of my time just wasted.

I didn't have boundaries around my time.

And because I was so overwhelmed, I was like, it was almost like a blanket when I would get in, stuck in a conversation with somebody and it was like, oh, well, I just couldn't pull away but it was really the only time that I could take a break.

And so I would, like, put myself in these conversations that I knew were just going to draw on and on and on, even if they weren't energy giving.

Like, if we were gossiping or we were, you know, whatever it was.

I wasted a lot of time doing unproductive activities.

Um, and then living in overwhelm.

Misplaced priorities.

Uh, like I said, my professional systems were thriving, but my personal life had no structure.

Health, like, the tidiness of my house, joy and fun in my life, like, all of it was just chaos.

My relationships weren't great.

My friendships weren't great.

It was just kind of a hot mess.

And then the worst part of living in overwhelm, for me was restlessness.

I had this feeling like I was stuck, and I couldn't figure out what I needed to do next.

Like, I'm like, what am I supposed to do next?

And the worst part, and this is where I think a lot of, especially women, get stuck in the overwhelm, is you go, okay, I know I'm capable of more, and I know I want to do more, but I can't possibly add anything else to my plate right now, right?

It's like, okay, yeah, I want to do this and do that and do all the things, but I'm already stretched to my absolute maximum capacity.

I can't do anymore.

And that was where I was at.

I had the restlessness.

I knew I had more potential, all the things, but I was already to the point where, like, I would get home at the end of the day and just, like, be so brain dead.

I.

I was like, I.

I can't.

I just can't add anything else to my plate.

So in 2024, when I started working with this coach, she obviously, right off the bat, was able to very quickly make me aware of situations that I think subconsciously I knew they needed to change, but I.

I convinced myself that, well, it's my responsibility.

Well, that's my job.

Well, that's my role.

You know, I convinced myself that, well, I have to do that.

And she.

She brought awareness to the fact that I can give myself permission to let those things go.

And so over throughout 2024, I let a lot of things go.

I stepped back from a lot.

A lot of the boards that I was on.

I'm currently only sitting on one board, which the.

This is the first time in, I think, seven years I'm sitting on one board, and I'm able to give it my full attention.

It Feels really good.

But she also opened my eyes to like, okay, if you are not working out then you're going to be stressed out during the day.

And if you're stressed out during the day then you're not going to sleep.

And it like just like obvious things that I knew I needed to be doing.

But when I was like sprinting, running, going, chasing, I couldn't imagine slowing down and taking time to go for a walk or slowing down and taking time to like make myself a nutritious breakfast versus driving through McDonald's.

You know, it's, it's so backwards and it almost takes somebody just being like, hey, are you aware?

You know.

And so she helped me through a lot of that.

Also had a therapist that helped me through a lot of it as well.

But my coach definitely helped me start implementing systems and she helped me with, like I said, the love of systems that I am developing.

And when I first started introducing systems into my personal life, I was a little conflicted at first because at first they felt like nothing was happening.

Like I was like, these systems are so simple.

Can they actually really be effective?

Like I definitely overthought them.

But as I started to implement more and more and more I got to have, I started having so much fun with systems and now I like, I have a system for everything in the house and it's not overwhelming at all.

And it just runs like a well oiled machine.

Like my life runs like a machine.

There's still room for spontaneity and joy and there's still buffer time, you know, in case something comes up.

But in general, like it runs like a machine.

Like there's so much clarity and peace that I did not have before.

And my love for systems has definitely grown tenfold for sure, 100%.

And one of the major things that I have really enjoyed with systems and that has genuinely saved me from that massive feeling just like that.

Like, you know what I'm talking about.

When you're so overwhelmed, it's like somebody like takes your like stomach and just like starts wringing it like a towel.

Like that's how I felt.

But for like three or four years at a time, like it was just like somebody like pinched my shoulders together and then they tightened my stomach and I was just like in a knot all of the time.

And I had all these ideas, I had all these great things I wanted to do with my life, but I did in my mind, I didn't have time to do any of them because I was already so overwhelmed and so One of the things that I have started practicing this last couple of months, so starting, I guess, in October, ish, is really diving into the 8020 principle and identifying what truly matters.

And when I sat down and because I did a big brain dump of, like, my responsibilities, and I realized that the majority of my quote unquote responsibilities were not my own.

So I think I've mentioned on the podcast before, but if I haven't, David Allen's book, Getting Things Done.

It is so dry and so boring, but it's so valuable because he really gives you, like, tangible steps to getting things done.

And one of the things that he does after a brain dub is he defers, deletes and delegates.

So he defers it if it's something that he wants to get done, but he doesn't need to work on it right now.

He defers it to a later time on the calendar.

He deletes it if it's something that was maybe just kind of like a off the off the cuff, random thing.

And, you know, on second glance, he's like, actually, I don't want to do that.

He deletes it or he delegates it if it is not his responsibility, he delegates it to the person whose responsibility that it actually is.

And so I think back in November, it might have been because it was after we got back from Europe, I made it like a long list.

It was ugly.

Brain dumps are not fun if you do them right.

They're not fun, but they're so beneficial and you will feel so good afterwards, I promise you.

When you're in the middle of it, it's absolutely miserable.

But at the end, it feels so freaking good.

And so I'm going through, you know, bringing up everything that I considered my responsibility.

And then I went through the list and you have to go back through it several times, you know, because on first glance you were like, oh, well, of course, all this is my responsibility.

But then when I started to go through and delete, defer, delegate, delete, defer, delegate, delete, defer, delegate, there were only a few things that were actually my responsibility.

And looking at it from like an 80, 20 principle of, you know, 80% of your actions, 20% of your actions are going to give you 80% of your results.

I was giving 80% of my attention to the wrong thing.

And the things that mattered most, I was only giving 20% to.

And so I really had to reevaluate and reanalyze what that looks like for me.

And unfortunately, and my people pleasers, go ahead and raise your hand unless you're driving, then keep your hands, both hands on the steering wheel.

But it was very difficult, especially that delegate part, to do that because I had to let a lot of people down and.

And some people were openly disappointed.

And I just.

And maybe I'll.

I'm going to jot this down.

I'm going to go through an episode as well.

I think I'm still processing all of that, how much I had to let people down in 2024, because it was not easy.

Like, it's.

It's something that's still pretty heavy on my heart, but I had to go through that river of misery to get to the other side.

And like I said, it wasn't easy, but I'm so glad that I went through it because now that I am, I'm kind of sort of, I'm getting to like a.

An easier part of the river.

I was in a really rough, rocky, choppy patch for a second.

Storm clouds above.

We didn't have life jackets.

Things were rough.

It's still a little.

It's still a little rocky, but it's gotten a lot better, for sure.

I'm thankful that I, I did what I needed to do to help my overwhelm in my situation.

And for me, really being intentional about overcoming overwhelm and really being intentional about implementing systems that were sustainable for me in my life has created so much joy in my life.

I can't even tell you.

I have more free time.

I have more free time now than I've ever had in my whole entire life, including my childhood.

Like, I literally have so much free time now, and I have more free time and I'm more productive.

Isn't that crazy?

I was talking to a friend about this the other day.

I haven't seen him.

Goodness.

In.

Did I see him at all in 2024?

No, I don't think I have.

And so, you know, he was like, whoa, you're so different.

Like, what's up?

You know, what happened?

And I told him, I said, I literally was like so ruthless about cutting my 80 out.

Like, I'm.

I'm laser focusing on my 20.

And I told him, I said, actually, I'm about to like, jump to another 20.

I'm about to laser focus in even more and eliminate another 80%.

And, you know, he was asking, he was like, well, are you getting less done because you're not working as many hours and you're not, you know, you, you have your weekends back and your evenings back.

I'm like, no, I'm getting so much done.

Boundaries, systems and really good habits changed my life.

And he was like, okay, I need you to put all this in an email and send it to me.

I'm like, actually, I'll send you some podcast episodes.

No, he.

He confessed to me that this podcast is not his jam, which I get.

My husband has not listened to the podcast, which I'm also.

I'm like, blakely, you're not Joe Rogan, so let it be.

I know my audience, and I'm talking right to y'all.

I'm not worried about those boys.

They can stay over there in their mud pits or whatever they're doing.

But through this last year, I have learned so many lessons.

Implementing systems has not just implementing systems, getting so good at systems.

Like, I'm, I'm.

I've gotten so good at systems.

I.

When I was at the summit that I went to a couple weeks ago, I was listening to a friend talk and I, like, could instantly help her, like, implement a system.

She was like, oh, my gosh.

I never, I didn't think about it that way.

I'm like, I know.

It's magical, isn't it?

Systems are so great.

She actually messaged me a couple days ago and she was like, I implemented that system and it's just, it's running so beautifully.

I'm like, that's the power of a frickin system.

And one of the great things about systems is they allow you to go with the flow.

Now, that might sound counterintuitive, and I think that this is what stops a lot of people from implementing a system, is they go, okay, I'm already overwhelmed, and now you're asking me to learn this crazy system, try to implement this system, and remember to run the parts of the system on top of everything else that I've already been doing.

And this system is going to restrict me.

And it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no.

It.

Quite the opposite.

This system is going to delete a lot of the things that you've been doing, it's going to simplify what you're doing moving forward, and it's going to give you all this free time back.

And because you have a system that you're confident in and you know you're not going to drop the ball on something.

You can be more present in the moment with your kids, with your pet, with your friends, with your family, because you know there's a system running in the background somewhere.

Whether you have it on paper, whether you have it digitally, you know, There's a system that's going to take care of what needs to be taken care of and it gives you time to be creative and think outside the box and bring more joy into your life.

For me, at least, it opened up so much for me once I started implementing really good systems.

I, I so much of my mental time just opened up and I was able to be more creative and think of better ideas.

Like this idea that I've got coming up that y'all are gonna love so much.

It's gonna be so, so great.

But it really did.

It changed my life.

And it has also a crazy byproduct of it.

It has forced me to get outside of my comfort zone because you, you do end up with a fair amount of free time if you, if you run your systems properly.

And you realize with this newfound free time, you're like, I want to install really good habits in this new area and I don't want to fall back on what I've been doing.

I want to step into the, the 10x version of me.

And that for me has been completely different.

Like, I just sat down with one of my coaches and time blocked my week, this next week.

And I'm not going to lie, I'm really uncomfortable with it because it's not how I would typically operate my week.

I am being forced to.

Forced in a way that, like, I'm excited because I know the end result is going to be great and I trust this coach because she talks to talk, walks the walk.

But my schedule this next week is not time intensive by any stretch of the imagination.

It is actually probably one of the most flexible, flexible schedules I think I've ever had.

However, the way that it is laid out and the tasks that are on my time blocks, like, I don't know if you just heard, like, my voice catch a little bit because it is so different than what I'm used to.

But I know that in order to get somewhere different, I'm going to have to start acting different and I'm going to have to start being different.

I'm going to start doing different.

In the, at the private retreat or private quiet retreat that I was at this weekend, I read this book.

If you haven't read it, you really need to.

It is so good.

It was called Whisper by Mark Batterson and it was talking about the.

The book was about hearing the whispers of God.

And in the book he talked about how a lot of us will, like, ask God something and then he gives us an answer and we're like, Okay, I don't really want to hear that.

And that's what I realized in my life, was that there was a certain amount of comfort that I had developed in certain areas.

Well, the majority of the areas of my life.

And I didn't want to grow.

And I thought I'd grown out of that.

Even.

Like, if you asked me back in December, I'd have been like, oh, I'm past that.

And then now almost February, I'm like, oh, wow, I still have a lot of work to do.

Um, so that is, you know, truly the power of, of coaching and having that accountability partner there is.

You get outside of your comfort zone.

That's one of the fun things about systems is as you grow, they grow with you.

They constantly adapt.

And, like, that's why it's so fun to, like, learn how to get really good at systems systems.

So you can constantly just like, constantly edit them and they just flow with you.

And it feels so good.

At least it will feel good.

Like I said, I'm really nervous about this next week because it is going to stretch me outside of my comfort zone, like, a lot.

But I'm, I'm.

I'm trying to tell myself that I'm really excited about it, so maybe I'll stay in that higher energy.

But for you, I want to encourage you to reflect on your own life and identify maybe some areas where systems could simplify and elevate your day.

And I don't want you to.

I don't want you to think about what the system is.

I just want you to think, where could I have better systems?

Could I have better systems with my laundry?

Could I have better systems with when I fill up my gas tank?

Can I have better systems with when I get my Walmart delivery?

Could I have better systems with when I check the mail?

You know, it's little things like that that get us really thrown off.

For me, mail is a perfect example.

I can't check my mail every day when I get home because I am so.

I get so easily distracted if I have something to do when I get home, like if I'm on a schedule, because sometimes I'm at the house and, you know, if it's after five, I'm relaxed, I'm in my pajamas, I can go check it, no problem.

But if I am, say, coming back for a workout and I have a time block I'm about to step into, I can't go check the mail because my brain, I've become very aware I will go down a rabbit hole.

So Fast you, y'all will not see me for an hour and a half.

I'll get a letter in the mail or I'll get like, this was a great one.

A couple weeks ago I got one about my car's home, like extended warranty or something.

And I was like, I remember the guy that sold me the car, he said something about making sure the warranty for the electronics was kept up to date because the whole car was made out of electronics.

Now it was a whole thing.

And so I like take the letter and I.

And keep in mind I'm like, like speed walking because I had something to do.

And then I'm driving, like I'm diligently driving back to my house because I got something to do.

And I made the mistake of checking the mail.

And then I go down an hour rabbit hole with this warranty that finally I was like, you know what?

I'm like, I need to reach out to the person who can have this done in five minutes.

I needed to delegate that task.

But just think of situations like that in your life where maybe you go down a rabbit hole or maybe you get super distracted by something or like a part of your day that's not working right, a part of your week that's not really working, a part of your overall life that like, is like a constant source of chaos.

And don't think about all of them, just think about one and think, if I had a system for this, how much smoother could this be?

And like I said, you don't have to think about the system.

And I don't want you to overthink all the problems.

I just want you to kind of start to get that awareness of, like, could I put a system here, could I put a system there?

Like, could I put a really easy, like 30 second system in that could change my whole week.

If it changes an hour, it changes a day, and if it changes a day, it changes a week, week, a month, month, a year, year, your whole life.

So like, keep that in mind.

Like one little teeny tiny change could be the solution.

And like I said, I don't want you to overthink the system.

I have something that I'm working on that is going to help you create your own systems.

It's going to help you get really good at systems, it's going to help you refine systems, can help you brainstorm systems, all the things.

It's going to be so freaking helpful.

Not just for systems, but systems are definitely the root of all of it.

Because like I said, Systems are.

Have changed my life, are changing my life.

And I see so much overwhelm with women.

And I truly think that systems are the key because they can just smooth over the edges.

They can help us put things in.

In an order that makes sense, and they can also alleviate our anxiety because we know, okay, I'm not forgetting anything.

I'm not dropping the ball.

No, I'm not actively doing anything right this second.

But I know exactly when I will do it.

I know exactly how I will do it.

And I can, in this moment, Even if it's 30 seconds, I can sit here and feel peace knowing that it's gonna get done.

And, like, if you can give yourself, like, the gift of just being able to sit for a minute in silence and not be worried and stressed about a million things and feeling guilty because you're dropping the ball, like, that is going to be such a gift for you.

And I know that because that was me not long ago.

I was that girl that was like, oh, my goodness.

I, Like, I would be afraid to show up on social media because I'd be like, I'd.

Look, I'd have, like, a legal pad with, like, all the stuff I thought I needed to do.

I was like, oh, my gosh.

Like, I can't post on social media because I just know I'm forgetting something.

And if I post and somebody's going to be mad at me and they're going to think I'm.

I'm ignoring them.

And it's, you know, like, it is just like, it was a constant.

And I'm not saying that I don't ever feel that anymore, but it's definitely more rare.

The majority of the time I go, I can go, okay.

I don't have to work on everything all at once.

I don't have to stress about everything all at once.

I don't have to focus on everything all at once.

I can focus on doing the next right thing and living in the present moment as much as possible and knowing that everything is still going to get done because I have a system.

Doesn't that sound so good?

It's really good.

Okay.

Y'all are gonna like it.

Okay.

That is all I've got for you guys.

I hope.

I know that this episode didn't have a ton of tangible tips, but I.

This episode was just meant to be a.

You're not alone.

If you feel like the thoughts in your brain are just so, like, static.

I don't know if this is going to age me or make me super young, but when the, when we had like the.

I call them regular TVs and you would flip to a channel that wasn't on cable and it had that, like, staticky screen.

Screen.

That's what my brain felt like for a long time.

Just like static.

Just like such intense white noise.

I couldn't think about anything else.

And it was, it wasn't.

It was a miserable way to live, for sure.

And I, I feel other people's pain when they talk about their overwhelm.

I'm like, yep, that was me.

That was me for sure.

Like, I know exactly how you feel because I was there.

And that's why I'm.

I'm spending so much time working on what I'm working on.

Because I think it's going to change a lot of lives.

At least I hope it is.

Okay, that's all I've got for y'all.

Hope you enjoyed this episode.

I hope that, like I said, wouldn't inspire you, but I hope it just made you feel seen and heard.

And I hope you have a great, great rest of your day and I will see you in the next episode.

Thank you for tuning in to the Elevated Edit podcast.

I hope you found today's episode inspiring and full of actionable tips.

Don't forget to check out the show notes for all the resources and links mentioned.

If you enjoyed the show, please subscribe, leave a review and share it with your friends.

Follow us on social media for more updates and inspiration.

Until next time, keep growing, glowing and elevating your life.

See you soon.