Hello and welcome to the Choosing Happy Podcast.

I'm Heather Masters, your host and let's get straight to it.

It's all about work, life, balance.

And if I had a pound for every inspirational post hammering about the importance of perfect balance, I'd be able to retire to a cottage by the sea.

That would be nice, assuming I could somehow balance the mortgage and my sanity.

But here's the thing, honestly, this idea that we're meant to have work on one side and life on the other, all neatly weighing out like some cosmic set of kitchen scales, it just doesn't work.

It's absolute nonsense.

So stay tuned for today's myth Busting Monday.

Let me paint you a picture.

Years ago, back in my corporate days, I would pore over those time management books, you know, the ones you see at train stations, yellow highlighter in hand, determined to unlock the secret to fitting it all in.

I mean, if you remember these things.

I even had a Filofax way back in the day.

Spoiler alert.

I never did manage to fit it all in.

I even trained the stuff, I taught it, got all detailed on task measurement and delegation, ran workshops, the whole thing, all tmi.

There was a time I was juggling more than just work and life.

I was a whirling dervish.

I was managing multi million pound projects in it, knee deep in deadlines while taking a part time mba.

And my son was just a year old.

The plate spinning, that was a full on circus act.

And I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who resonate.

And I vividly remember one Monday morning, standing in my kitchen with a calendar covered in colour coded boxes, phone pinging, dog whining for a walk, the washing machine doing a little bit of a samba in the corner.

And there was.

I dropped.

Trying to convince myself that if I just scheduled it right, I'd somehow feel at peace.

Work and life and perfect harmony.

Truth is, I felt like I hadn't done either properly in absolutely ages.

I was tired, strung out and wondering who I was actually doing it for.

Even now, swapping corporate suits for muddy wellies, it's no easier.

Content, deadlines, clients needing feedback, the garden shouting for a bit of love and somewhere between it, trying to remember what makes me happy, what really brings me joy.

There's never a moment the scales aren't wobbling and the myths that I'll ever get them level, well, that's what I'm busting today.

So here's a few lessons to think about.

Number one is that balance isn't something you achieve and tick off.

It's always a moving target.

You know, real life is more like improvising with a supermarket trolley with wonky wheels than mastering tightrope walking.

Some weeks work takes over, other weeks, life does, or the flu does, or someone gets ill, or I have to do something different.

It's not failure, it's just human.

It's just life.

Number two, integration beats separation.

Instead of chasing some mythical 50, 50 split or even the old 80, 20 rule, I started to look for moments of harmony.

Walking the dog instance isn't just life.

Sometimes it's where my best business ideas drop in.

Or I shake off the stress of that zoom call gone wrong.

Or I just take that moment to catch my breath and to really come back to the present.

Life and work, blur and swirl together.

It's not only okay, it can even be lovely.

I mean, one of the things that I've really learned is that if I have to work late, if I've got a lot to do, deciding that I want to do it and I'm going to enjoy it because I love my work.

It takes away the stress.

It just melts away.

I'm doing what I love, and if I'm doing what I love, then there is no blur, you know, there is no kind of separation between life and work.

I think sometimes when we separate them, we add pressure.

It's okay to have work as part of your life, as something that you enjoy.

And imperfection.

This is lesson three.

That imperfection is actually freedom.

The more I let myself off the hook for not balancing, the lighter and happier I feel.

And the really bizarre thing is the more I let myself off the hook because things have gone wrong, the more I get them right.

Next time, giving myself permission to wobble, to drop the oddball, to say not today without an ounce of guilt is a radical act of self kindness and actually shifts things around.

You know, you've probably heard that in order to speed up, you should slow down.

I think this is one area where I do that.

If things have gone wrong and I've messed up, if I let it go, step back and just slow down and let myself off the hook next time around, I can approach it differently.

And it's really interesting how well things flow.

So here's a simple challenge for you this week.

Ditch the scales.

Instead, notice one place where work and life actually blend together in a way that suits you.

Maybe it's an outdoor call.

Maybe it's laughing at your inbox with a friend over coffee.

Maybe it's letting the washing pile up and choosing a nap instead.

And maybe it's something like I do with my meditation and visualization in the in the morning I can visualize my day going perfectly and in doing so things just pop into my head that will really make this the difference and I can celebrate a day before it's even begun.

So celebrate those moments instead of chasing some made up ideal.

I hope this hit home.

I hope there were some aha moments.

Let me know Leave a review or tag Choosing Happy Podcast with your very own Balance Fails or best Wobble saving trick.

If you've got a friend doing the plate spinning Olympics right now, share this with them.

And as always, subscribe for more messy human myth busting on Mondays.

And remember, a perfectly balanced life is a myth, but a life that feels true even when it's wonderfully wobbly.

Now that's real happiness.

And one of the favorite my favourite quotes is that man plans God laughs.

So I'm off to walk the dog, ignore the laundry, and probably answer emails in my slippers.

Speak soon.

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this week's episode.

If you enjoyed it or think it would be valuable to others, please do share.

And if you really enjoyed it, please leave me a review.

It really helps the podcast.

All of the links are in the show notes and I look forward to seeing you next week on the Choosing Happy Podcast.