Humbleness is understanding that there's always something. To learn from

anybody. Okay, right. Like, like, I can learn a lot

from you. It's not because I'm the, whatever, Michael Jordan of Jiu Jitsu that I

have nothing to learn. No. Let me see. Okay. You have a skill that I

don't have. You know, maybe you, you, you, you're also

educator. Let me see how you speak. How do you develop

that skill of communication? And, and I get that a lot in Jiu

Jitsu. And I really communicate to my guys. Say guys, like,

okay, I'm who I am, but there's always something to learn.

Welcome to the King Within, a podcast for men who seem to have it.

All, yet feel like they're losing what matters most. I'm Mike

Salemi and I've been there. Successful on paper, but disconnected on the

inside. This isn't about grinding harder. It's about mastering your

emotions, leading with calm strength, and rebuilding

trust at home. Each week we dive into real stories and tools for becoming

the man your family runs towards, not away from. Because you didn't

build this life to. Lose yourself in it. This is the King Within. Let's do

the work. If courage needs fear, today's guest, Shonji

Hebero, brings the blueprint. A Jiu Jitsu legend,

multi time world and ADCC champion, and a teacher of

teachers. We unpack what it really means to live with a warrior's

mindset. How fear can become a friend, how humility after

victory transforms a man, and how Jiu Jitsu can raise

stronger, more grounded kids. You'll hear why keeping a white belt

mentality might be the key to mastery and how movement itself can open

a spiritual state. If you're a father or a man trying to stay grounded

in soft times, this one's going to land. If this conversation

resonates, please follow and share and leave a quick review. It helps more

men find this work. Let's get into it, brother.

What's going on, dude? We made it happen. You made it made it happen. That

was one of the fastest, faster tow

truck car exchanges. Had some car trouble coming here

and man, I really appreciate you making time to connect with me.

Yeah, of course, man. You always be there for me, my combo brother.

You know, I was being very open to train

me and connect and I couldn't do any different, brother.

Hell yeah. Thank you. When was when I had served you

combo? That was like five years ago, four years ago,

something like that. I don't know, it's been a while. I still lived in my

first apartment was right in the garage. It was

a beautiful time we spent there. I think it's been like three years,

maybe four. Yeah, I think was one 20, 21,

22 maybe. Yeah. And you've been, I mean, you've been

competing, I know, for your entire life, right? And you were

competing at that time and you're, you got a competition just coming up here in

a few weeks, right? Yeah, I'm going to compete for the who's number one. You

know, wo in Austin. I made a point to come back,

be more active. This year I did European. It's funny because I was 25 and

seems like I, I completed last year. I was going through the, I was.

Going, I was doing a study and. My

esoteric shaman, oh, you can say him that. He said, hey, when did you

spend your birthday? You know, I'm going to like, you. Know, your alignments, your planets

and stuff. Yeah, you know, I was in Dubai. No, I wasn't. Where was I?

You know, I was like, very confused. So I spent in

Lisbon. That was my birthday. And that's when I came

into competition. Did Europeans, jiu jitsu, Europeans. And then,

then after that I did another one. And then I was. And then I got

called to who's number one? And I thought, who's number one? And then there was

a moment there was no competition there. And then I

signed up for this tournament at the Pyramid, you know, the, the

Masters International. And then they called me to who's on board on the same time.

I end up, you know, have a little injury in the tournament. I still compete

who's number one? Didn't go my way, that one. I was like, man, I think

I was like stuck in my throat for a little bit. And then, you know,

wo come back to Austin and of course my last

fight in Austin was amazing. Big crowd. So I got it again.

Why do you, for you, why do you still compete? Like, what's your reason for

competing these days? I, I,

it's like being active. I think

I train so much, you know, I have a team, you know, Victor Hugo,

Philippe Noah, all those guys. So I'm always trained with them. So I'm always in

shape. And it's something that I think just is not

sometimes for the fact of winning. Of course,

I don't like losing it just as also just keep me disciplined, keep

me with goals. You know, sometimes when you go too much into

the business, corporate ideas, you have a tendency

sometimes, you know, And I think it just keeps me with the energy of the

Warrior, you know. And in Jiu jitsu, we don't really retire,

become masters. Even though I'm about almost

Master 4 in a couple, in two years, there's still great

professional events such as, you know, probably know. And then you have like

PGA stars and, you know, events that they're able

to do a matchup. That makes sense. You know, for me, I think it's

difficult to at my age, you know, and of course I try to be

as natural as possible. I'm not into anything yet.

You know, I'm not sure if one day I'll even need like going to like

therapy, replacement or things like this. So I think it's very difficult

for me to, at 44, I'll be 45 in

January, to just kind of had that ego.

I say I'm gonna be a world champion again, an adult, you know, and. And

it's very difficult, you know. So for me, I think just fighting my age

and then eventually set up fights where it's one match only

and something that like, I can give everything I have and I can die after

that, and that's not going to be a problem because I don't have to fight

again. So I think it just keeps me healthy, keep me striving to

get better. I'm not just compete at wno.

I also registered for the Austin Half Marathon. I'm not read that

yet. I never ran my whole life. This year I did

the 5K. That's awesome. Such a challenge to

do it. So, yeah, I have a couple things. That just keeps me like when

I. Want to sleep a little more, I. Remember that I had to wake up,

I had to run, I had to train, I have to. And also I think

people appreciate my technique when I fight. And I think also

keeps. Keeps us relevant. And yeah, just

the challenge, the challenge itself, it's what keeps me going. I mean, that

last piece, the challenge itself is what keeps you going. And that

warrior mentality, like most of the listeners of this show, are about 90

plus percent men who want to tap into

whatever it means to be a warrior for them.

And the discipline that you've showed one, it's super

inspiring. But the discipline that you've held for the majority of your life

within and outside of the sport of Jiu jitsu, or in the craft of Jiu

jitsu. Can you share a bit about your family? Was I

know your brother does Jiu jitsu. Was this something that you just got

plugged into from a super young age? And it was. You knew what you were

gonna do or how did you get plugged into this world?

No, my. My dad was a businessman,

loved work. And I think his honesty and

hard workness, let's put it this way, and. And the way that

he. He just dived into. Be the provider for

the family, you know, I think that that really stands out. And of

course, the passion that my mom had, where, you know, she had her own job

and she decided to care for all the kids, and she was relentless, you know.

So I think that attitude towards a love and

a passion and a duty, and I think that really stands

out, you know, it was almost like an unspoken law, you know, that was

like, you need to be like this. I just look at them doing, and I

mimic. So as far as martial arts, I started,

you know, very young age in judo. Like every

kid in Brazil, mom puts them in judo. And that's how it

started. But it wasn't until I moved back to Manaus,

my brother was already doing jujitsu. And then

I always tell this story. It's so funny, because every time I'd say that, and

my friends, you know, they called me, say, hey, you said that story again.

We had Chihuahua, who was one of our neighbors. He

had this grass area in front of his house, and that was just like

a square. And every time we. I don't know, we just felt

like we want to get into a fight or something. We just grapple, right? We

wouldn't. I don't know, I guess we didn't want to ask. Kids just throw

blows at each other and hurt each other, I think. Say, let's go to the.

Let's settle this in the grass, you know? Yeah. One day, this kid

inside my guard, I didn't know about Jiu Jitsu, but I knew grappling for some,

like, a headlock. I knew how to do a key lock or something like this.

Like, it just very raw. I knew how to, like. I knew the goals

of being on the ground, like, on top of you, right? I didn't really

knew too much, but I knew the goal. So, anyway, one time this

kid just squeezes my neck and hurts. And I get home and I'm like, my

neck and my brother, what the going on? Sorry, that word. Oh, you're good. And

then he's like. I was like, oh, you know, I say, dude, you gotta get

stronger. You gotta try Jiu Jitsu. I'm like, you what? Like, what is

that? You know? He's like, yeah, you know, I've been doing this. I've been here

for six months. Like, I've been doing. They never told me. He said, yeah, I'll

take you. So, yeah, he took me to Jiu Jitsu and never

stopped. You know, I loved it. The idea of not

being lazy, but the. The effortlessness that. The goal

of it, using technique, overpower. And I think that really. Oh, that's

good. I like. I like efficient ways of things, you know, I like things to

be efficient. I never been strong, you know, like, physically strong. I

think I'm very functional strong. But, like, if I have to

do. Like a bench press, I don't think. I'm strong at all. I'm not. I'm

not strong in the gym, but I think I have being strong within

the particularity of the skill that needs to be. To be a grappler, you

know? And, yeah, and then I started it, and I kept doing it,

and in tournaments start to show up. I started winning, and I started like.

Like winning. You know, I think the challenge of, like, battle another man

and not needing to throw punches, I think that was very cool.

Even though we trained a lot back in the day to survive on the streets,

because I started Jiu Jitsu in a time that

Luta Librian Jiu Jitsu, which now is no GI Jujitsu,

Right. That was a very big thing of proving who was better. And

we prove who was better by fighting, not grappling. So

there was a lot of, like, street fights. And I'm talking about, I'm 11,

12 years old. I have to watch my back, you know, wearing a

jujitsu shirt. You couldn't wear a jujitsu shirt. No way. No, because if they see

a Jiu jitsu, and then a Luta delivery guy will see a karate guy for

that, says, hey, you're the Jiu Jitsu guy. So are you. Are you

really think you're better than us? Like, literally, that's how it was. So it was

very difficult. Anyway, fast forward, moved to Rio,

went to college, and at the time, my brother was already a world champion, and

I had world championships medals. And then I think Jiu jitsu just

became part of me, and I had the chance to teach

seminars. And eventually I got a call,

I guess a spiritual call to come to America and try to teach. And then

I loved it, you know, and then right away, I made some money, even though

there's. That wasn't really the industry. It's like today, you know, today

is way more, you know, it's more of an industry. That happens.

Yeah. Just go call into me, and then I Say, I'm not coming back to

law school, and the rest is history, you know. So you were in law

school. Okay, interesting. So there's a lot of dads who

listen to this podcast. And, you know, my son is almost 3 years old,

and when I think, you know, what are the things that I would want? What

are the lessons? What are the teachings? What's the experiences that I want to provide

to him that'll really serve him as he goes from

boy into manhood? And, you know, as a kid, my first

sport was gymnastics. And so the two that come up is, without

a shadow of a doubt, gymnastics and jiu jitsu. What do you see? I

mean, you run multiple schools, you've taught all over the world

for most of your life. What do you think and what did you experience

as a kid in addition to what can you. Jiu jitsu, or

committing to that at a young age? What can it teach someone.

That now we need three hours to talk about? Let's go. But it's simple. I

think it's very simple because jiu jitsu will give him a lot of

challenges. The first challenge is just to have attention, you know what I mean?

Be a good listener, you know, being in a position to where

he needs. Of course, if you find a school that does, because

our school, a lot of people, because of our background, they come here

and say, oh, I want my son to be a champion. I'm like, well, does

he have the attitude of a kid first? Is he a kid? Right.

I think I'm a very. I started at a young

age. I was 10, which is even older than a lot of kids starting today.

And I didn't really put the responsibility, really, to

like, oh, my God, I want to do something until I was like, 16 or

17, you know, so I was a kid, you know, I

went to the. I played soccer in the street. I did a lot of stupid

things. I climbed trees, I jumped rivers. You know, I

ran from dogs in the street. Like, I did a lot of things as a

kid. And I think today, what

for me is the biggest mistake is putting your kids in jiu jitsu for him

to be a champion, you know, I think before a

champion and before anything else, they must be a martial artist,

you know, understand that the values and the virtues that requires to

be a martial artist, right? The discipline, the honesty, the,

the, the. The. The justice that he has to attain

within the process of struggling through martial arts, right? So

I think with jiu jitsu school and the proper teachings, you know,

he's Going to come here, be challenged. You know, he's going to have a little

victories. He's going to suck some days, you know, he might have a

kid that has his number. He never beats the kid and he. Has to live

with that for another couple years, right? So I always, I always like,

like to say that Jiu Jitsu play life without you getting hurt,

right? The only thing that hurts is your ego, right? Like I didn't win,

right? So, so our definition of winning in.

Jiu Jitsu is like, am I showing up? That's a win,

right? Like, can you take your kid? You probably don't. I don't

think your kid who ever gonna have an iPhone for a while. But

okay, do you want to get. Off the couch and go to Jiu Jitsu? No.

I'm your father. You're going, right? And it's interesting because a lot of kids which

are all the parents, they sometimes they don't want to force the kid to do

it. But there's no other way. You need to do something hard every

day, right? And I was ever actually even have a

conversation about this day, these days with my friend. And like now there's this,

this cult we as leaders, we want to bring,

okay, do something difficult every day. Like do something

challenging every day, right? And it's almost like it's our job to

create those hardship because life

isn't hard anymore. Like, you know what I mean? Like, let's say you want to

go on a date. You on your phone, you want to call food. You on

your phone, you want to. The good thing about it, we could do business

remote. That's great, right? That's. But, but in our time, if I.

Want to talk to a girl, I. Had to go walk to her house, knock

on the door, maybe her father would come up. If I call her home,

who's going to answer it? You know, let's

have another conversation. For you to see a. But you need to like watch until

maybe look around Playboy. Whenever Playboy will come around. So there

was nothing there, you know what I mean? Like, and then we can

even go on to like men who testosterone levels and things like that. So at

our time that was hard. Anything was hard.

When you study, you have to go and grab the barsa or encyclopedias.

My house, like I think I don't know America. But like in

Brazil is that was almost a requirement. Every house

has library because how are you going to study for school? So

everything was very difficult for us, right? So today I

think Jiu Jitsu itself recreates lives a lot, right?

Let's say your kid get really good at Jiu Jitsu, right? He's going to come

in here to show off and beat up the kids or he's going to show

kindness. Oh, that kid is having an issue. He's not that great. Maybe I'll allow

him to work a little bit so he, he gets the one minute praise that

gets him to be good. And then, you know, and then eventually he struggles

again. So I think Jiu Jitsu is a whole package on that level. You know,

they have to stay in one position, they have to be attentive. We have an

oath. Like I tend to be gentle, respectful and good listener. You

know. And I always give my best to develop myself discipline to have

the courage to do what's right and truthful. That's you know, the first two lines

of our oath. You know, I think with the kids this is very important,

you know, respecting the teacher, respecting orders,

respecting operationals. You know, I mean, respect that there is a way to do

certain things in here. So I think that creates an environment

where now the structure and adding with education

at home, you know, necessary. I know you talk to your kid, he's like,

listen to you, you know what I mean? And then they become task oriented.

Okay. The task today is go around your, your partner's legs and

then gonna. So it plays life, you know, in a very

fun way, but also a structural way. So I think that's what

Jiu Jitsu in a proper school, in a proper

methodology, with the great teachers that we have can bring to a

kid. But if he's gonna go there, just like, you know, play ball, you know,

be nice. Yes, you know, we do what you want. Yeah, it's

okay. Hey, your winner. Let's go win over the time. You know what I

mean? That's, I don't think that's. That's how it should be. I think the mentality

of winning of course is important, but the definition of winning is I

think is way greater because allows them to understand that life is

difficult. And we through effort, you know, the mistake is a

learning lesson. And, and they're prepared. Man, I could

not agree more. Like what you're saying it plays

life. It's really life school, right? It's a training

for life school. And that piece

around doing something uncomfortable every single day.

To your point. Exactly. I couldn't say it any better unless we especially

as parents, because that's what I'm thinking is like, how can I support

my boy and really growing into being a solid,

respectful man of integrity, strong, who's got willpower,

who's got focus. And unless I take an active role

in creating, cultivating those experiences

or putting him around people like that's one thing

I'm so big around. Surrounding myself especially and surrounding him

with people that inspire us, that model what it means to be a

good man. But we have to take that initiative. Exactly.

Yeah. Alice. Especially today because we're more

secluded, you know, like I said. Right. Like we're around the

square boxes all the time, you know. And that's already

stressful. You know. Interesting. I have the theory about COVID

with everything. Look, everything around us is a square. Yeah. It's a square

computer. You know, it's a square windows. You know, like everything

is a square. That makes us box it into ourselves. And.

And now that's why kids are very like shy today now they.

It's hard them to open up because everything is boxed. You know.

And, and I think as parents especially they call the measure. I'm a

zillennial because I'm from the time that analog was still analog,

you know. So I went to the whole process of the. I'm very blessed to

be. To be that way. And I think like we talk

about right now is like how can I present life to our kids

in a way that prepared them to the outside world because otherwise, you

know, it's going to eat them. You know. Well, we're look, I'm looking

outside right now and in nature there are no straight lines.

No. Doesn't exist. Doesn't exist. And what's the thing

that is largely the most removed, speaking generally

from kids lives. It's time outside. Yeah. Playing just being

a kid. Yeah. Getting out that you don't see any straight lines in

nature. And that's why I think if kids just set the

iPhone down or their parents, you know, had some, some the structure piece

that you said as well. You know, I. I've definitely

talked to a handful of parents who think there's that belief that oh if

I'm being. If I employ too much structure, if I tell my kid no.

Etc, then I'm being a mean parent or a bad parent. And I think it's

the exact opp kids are craving. Yeah.

For structure. And that's really what I'm hearing. You're given what,

you know, giving to them. What would you say if you were to. To

pick one thing? I know there's a lot there but what are

you seeing showing up with the kids that are coming into the school or schools

today, what's the big thing that you're seeing? Is it that their

attention can't be focused? Is it that closed down? What's the

biggest either challenge or thing that you're viewing across the board

in terms of what they're coming in with? I could say many things, but I

would say just the social part. Just be part of a group.

Yeah. You know, and understand that sometimes you're going to be picked on, sometimes

you're not be picked on. It's just like coming out and

being themselves, you know, within a group. You know,

behaving within a group and things like this. Like I said, a lot of kids,

they come very shy because it's very common. Like when there's no

anything else to talk, you're in your phone. Right. Like being creative.

I think that that's the main thing. Like take them away

from a screen or, or their own world inside

of their brain. Now they're like get to grapple and be

playing war with their friends, you know, And I think that's very important

a lot. Most of the kids are very shy. They can't shake a hand.

Right. You know, they, they don't know how to interact. I think like

going back to just a basic social experiment, just be able to interact

with the kids, you know, and just like, hey, it's okay to be rough a

little bit, you know, these what it is. Right. Maybe I'm developing skill until

I'm technical and effortless. Yeah. Sometimes it's a little rough, you know, and that's okay,

you know, and be humble and have the humility to understand that

there's also a way to develop within

that group. So I think for me, the social, the community

aspect is huge, you know, be able to live in community

again. You know, families are smaller right now. Like, you know,

like, just look at my family. We're, we're like

27 cousins. Whoa. In one side of my family,

you. Know, and, and we grow up with cousins and people. And now like

you have one kid. I have one daughter. Like the families are getting smaller. Right.

So now that sense of family, it's

smaller. Right. And, and of course with the hardships. Of

like creating a job, creating opportunities. To withstand your

life is much more difficult than USB back in the day. You

know, you have three is three iPhones, three computers, three

of everything. Food is more expensive. So I think like the,

the, the, the, the, the cell of the society which the families is

turning smaller and now who do they interact right

at the same time? Like, okay, my kid has me, but

no, he needs someone on their level too. You know what I mean? So I

think Jiu Jitsu kind of bring that the kids, like, you know, the class just

ended. The homeschool kids, and they're there, they're having fun, they're

talking, they're doing extra. Just talk to their kids. Sometimes they're

exchan games, they're playing on. There's this little.

Sometimes I play with them. They spot it, I go there and play with them.

You know, it's just. And also they interact with us, so creates

that whole, like, levels of interaction. Like, I'm. Like I said, I'm 44 years

old. Sometimes I'm hanging out with Alina. Alina is the little baby that was there.

She's not even one year. No, she was only an old. And I'm hanging out

with her. You know, Imagine that girl when she grows up, say, hey, those are

my buddies. I've been here. Like, she bows the mat at one year of age.

Wow. The other day, we're clean the mats, she shows up

with a thing and she was actually going like this on

the mat. Wow. I was like, okay, he's already employed. Yeah,

yeah. I mean, years ago in schools, you wouldn't have

one grade, one age level. In the school, you would have

multiple different age levels. You might have some really young kids, you'd have some

five, eight, nine years older. And that

differentiation, like, some people might think, oh, how

are they all going to learn? But it's like, no, everybody learns something from

everybody else. And that socialization aspect without that, I mean,

take for example, like a dog. A dog that's not

socialized is largely the dog that's going to have a lot of

likely anxious issues, aggression issues if we're not

socialized with. If they're not socialized with other dogs or other people, they

won't know how to interact. So that social and community piece

is absolutely key. Yeah. And again, you know, like,

I think with the AI world and all the

technology, there's one thing that is irreplaceable is the experience,

the human experience. Right. You know, and how someone else

makes you feel. Right, Right. Like, of course, you go

to chat. GPT the. I was going to say you're amazing. You know what I

mean? But, but at the same time, like, like, like, you know, like

if we create a relationship where there is an understanding.

Right. Let's say you and I, we're friends. But now I need to like,

hey, you're doing this wrong on Your job, or hey, you,

boom, boom, boom, and then you. Okay, Sean is my friend. I believe he wants

the best for me, and I'm gonna understand and I'm gonna be humble to, like,

hey, how can I get better at this? You know? And I think

those experiences in life, you know,

it gets you better as a person, right? Because now you

with the same thing with Jiu Jitsu, right? People say, like, oh, Shonji, why do

you believe you're so good at Jiu Jitsu? I say, well, because I was able

to. If I wasn't put in this situation, I would create a

game that puts me in a bad situation, like side control, mount, position.

Because, you know, like, I was very lucky within my

group. I was always one of the better guys. So if I could go

to a whole week without being a bad position. So

I said, well, that doesn't work for me, because what if

someone puts me in a bad position, right? So I think

within time, I put volume of training, of being

uncomfortable position a lot. Even, like

in training or drilling or the educational part of. Of

Jiu Jitsu, I think I spent 80% of time

playing the person in a bad position, you know,

because in. Because we inspiring. Mostly I was in good

positions, you know, unless now that I'm older, of course I have better

fighters with me. So I had to create

situations to allow me to struggle. That's why, like, you

put me in situation in Jiu Jitsu, and I'm like, it's

okay. I've been here before, and it's okay. It's. It's something that. That's

not difficult. It is difficult and challenging, but it's not like, that's

gonna take my emotions to a level that I can have a. At

least a decent way to think about the situation and find a solution,

you know, like, I have Albert, for example. I learned my. I

grabbed my first kettlebell. I was 18 years old. Yeah. And right away, like, oh,

this is difficult. Next I know, oh, this is awesome. You know, oh, my God,

this is amazing. You know, it's very uncomfortable. And then to get more

uncomfortable, let's get maybe heavier kettlebell to see if now I can

recreate the same technique. And then I learn, you know, the Bulgarian bag. So I

think all those things are just. You're just putting your body into more

experiences to learn and have more IQ right? Of

movement, or in our case with kids, the emotional IQ

or regulation to deal with situations, you know, that life will

bring to you. And I think in martial arts fitness

and all those situations are just recreating

aspects of life that. That may come up to you

abruptly, but, hey, you practice enough, you know, so

now you can regulate, go back, learn and use the same principles in real

life. You know, you're for sure

one of the select, select, select

few people that I've ever met at a specific

high level who also has maintained

an incredible amount of humbleness and then also an

open and beginner's mind. Like your willingness

to, you know, I've seen you a bit with the kettlebell online. I know you

work a fair bit with Steve, and then getting to work with you

on the Bulgarian bag and like, the ability to

maintain a beginner's mind that I've observed in you, that's actually one of the most

inspirational qualities that I've seen,

you know, And I do think, from my perspective at least, that's one of the

keys that's kept you advancing. I'm curious,

is it. Can you say, where have you learned more? Has it

been learned more in training, on the mats with your training

partners, or in competition? Where have you learned more about yourself

as a man? I think it's a good

balance. I've had

situations in tournaments that I was completely. That I did

have attitudes that does not align.

You know, I've had situation that was like a little suburb, like,

I'm gonna win this, and I got my ass kicked. You know, maybe a

little extreme, extreme celebration where, you know, I

remember that over there, there's a guy. And also there are situations where, like,

I thought I was gonna lose and I won, right? So I think, like, the

competition is more of, like, a fine

line as far as, like, I can't have a

mistake, and if I do have one, it's going to be very clear, right? So

I think competition, it gives you a more clear

vision of, you know, of where

the mistake is. Could be your attitude. Could be a technical

attribute in training because the environment you are around, your friends,

you. You do learn a lot, right? But also. But sometimes it doesn't

really show a hundred percent because, you

know, you know, it's training, even though it's training, you know, but now, once we're

in a competition, now there's the whole thing of, like, you make it, you break

it, right? My first lesson, I would say.

I. Remember when was very interesting, but this

tournament really showed me a lot. It was my. It was the first time I

won the world's purple belt, and

my brother was already, you know, a big, big, you know, champion at the time.

Already. Known, right? And I had the name Hibero, right? And

I fought my first match, and I. The guy also lives

in Portugal. He's a triathlete. And we. We talk a lot. And he's like,

man, I'm so glad I did. I. I had this collaboration life,

and he walks in. I already see his. His behavior. I very like judo.

Like, boom. Like. And I'm like, oh, okay. He goes, hey, Alexi is an owner.

For me to fight you. I was like, the. Is it talking about? Like,

at that moment, I was like, no, no, no, no, no. Hold on, like. And

I was, okay. He respects me a lot. Maybe if you think. And now I'm

like. In my head, that was like, literally, like 10 seconds.

We shake hands, I walk away. Now this is all I say, you know what?

All right, this is a competition. I'm gonna eat him live. And then I'll. I'll

think about this later, you know, because now it goes from, like, is. I honor

me to fight you. Like, ha. I got you, right? So anyway, I beat him,

whatever. And then in the final, I beat this guy

that was my first rival and

kind of got in my ear, like, oh, he said, he's gonna smash you. You're

Salah's brother, but you're nobody. And I. And I. And once I got a position,

I. Smile at the picture, right? So it goes from, like, what

is honor to what arrogance, like, was really necessary for me to be that

way. And then that was a big thing for me at 18

years old. I'm like, there's something there, right? There is. There is a

responsibility. Because right now, I had first

acknowledged that was said to me and shifting. Like, okay, this is a

competition. This is war. And then later on,

I let someone talking shit to me to affect

the way I truly am. I'll say, does that represent what the first

guy said? And now I'm like, I went from, like,

the honorable man to the clown. So I started to really debate that

in my life right away, in the. Same day, in the same few hours, same

few hours. And I go home, and of course. Even my brother, he's. He. He

just loves being the Nassau. Sometimes he's like, you're a clown. Like, but I'm a

world champ. I'm like, I don't give a. You're still a clown, you know? So

now I'm like, wow, I'm the. Number one in the world. I beat the guy

that beat my whole team. Like, I was very confused,

but I. Was like, you know what? Maybe I need to

like, you know, the, the be the person dog thinks you are. I'm like,

maybe I should to. I need to work on myself to become

genuinely the person that that guy think I am. Wow. You know what I

mean? Right away does a lesson right away say, and

maybe, maybe what the guy was talking about, the other guy

wasn't even true. Why did I let that affect who I am?

I should just win and be respectful. That shouldn't change who

I am as a person because of someone action towards me, me,

you know, like, you know, if the guy's as. Shake my hand. If he doesn't

shake my hand, hey, it's on him, not on me. Right? So that was a

very big lesson right away, you know, in

life, I'm like, okay, I need to go back to the gym and I need

to be respectful and I need to become the person that that

guy thinks I am, you know, and, and I think, you know, to the day

I still learning, I'm still developing myself. I work a lot

on myself, you know, reading and, and through life's

experiences. Okay, there's a sit. What, what could I have done better

in that situation? Right. And it goes back to the, to. What

you're talking about, being humble. You know, people really think that humble is the attitude

of, you know, be. Submissive is being humble. No, humbleness is.

Understand that there's always something to learn from anybody. Okay,

right. Like, like I could learn a lot from you. It's not because I'm

the, whatever, Michael. Jordan of Jiu jitsu that I have nothing to learn? No. Let

me see. Okay. You have a skill that I don't have. You know, maybe you,

you, you, you're also educator. Let me see how you

speak. How do you develop that skill of communication?

And I get that a lot in jiu jitsu. And I really communicate to my

guys. Say guys, like, okay, I'm who I am,

but there's always something to learn. If you're gonna teach an arm lock,

the technique may be very simple, but. What I'm seeing

is like your interaction. With the crew, how to engage with the guys.

How do you present? Because maybe because you're more simplistic than. I

am, maybe your communication is more efficient than mine. Fine. Because

maybe I think into like, you know, angles that doesn't exist that

only I see, you know, maybe you're the one that makes simplistic,

you know, And I, and I always want them to understand that. And again,

the same time I have gone to position like, ah,

this Technique, you know, this is next. I know all my guys are losing.

Because I'm not being humble enough. Okay, let me understand this,

because at least baby is not my game. Maybe it's not something I'm going to.

Do, but definitely got to be something. That I need to understand

so I. Can pass it on. So I think that's the mentality. The white

pill mentality is about understanding. It's always something.

There's always a angle in the quantum physics of

things or life that it could go and resonate

with you differently. If it doesn't, great. That means, for example,

if I go and my instructor is showing a technique

just like mine, great. That means he's a good teacher. That means he's

mimic Mickey. That's who he is. And. And I'm glad that

it goes through where I am aligned with now maybe the other person

shows. As long as aligned to principles, that's fine. You

can have your own touch, you know, you can have your own individuality,

you know, So I think that's, for me, that's what it means to. To. To

have that, you know, the humbleness. Of course. Right there. You're my teacher.

Hey, us. What did you do? Do I have to stop? I need to wait

for you? Of course, sometimes because I know certain things, I have a tennis

sometimes to overlook, like, oh. Or like, okay, I know what doing

necessarily, like, you break into me. Like, okay. Oh, I never knew

I had to do this first. Oh, that's why I feel stiff.

Right? So that's why when I told you say, go with me like, I'm a

nobody. Because you came like, oh, you know, so. No, I don't

like, let's keep very simple. We work with the bag. Yeah, because I

know, like, you know, because I had exposure. I'm a white belt.

Cool, right? Sometimes when wrestlers come in, I said, no, I want to

learn wrestling. Like, like. And then I communicate, say, hey, can.

Can we share a little bit of how does that work? I say, well, don't

expect me to know. Right? You know what I mean? And then like, oh, oh,

okay. And even, like, sometimes I throw some guys off where I say,

okay, how's this? Even the other day I was working one of my guys,

and he's like, no, no. Can we just talk about. Let's talk about stance a

little bit, you know, let's say I'm the. And then now he's talking about those

things. Like, oh, yeah, yeah. I'm having fundamental mistakes

that I'm not being corrected because they expect Me. Wow.

To. So now I got. Now what I learn about myself is

because I. I think people has layers when they talk to me.

Some people just go, right. They don't. Oh, I don't give a shanji. Right. So

some people have layers of expectation that, like, I know everything. So sometimes

I need to communicate. Hey, can we go like, zero?

Like, for example, there was a resting stance that I was getting thrown. Thrown off

by, say, whoa, I'm doing too much of a judo stance in

here because I'm a judoka and I. Have the grip, which I

can have. A leeway to move my hip in a certain direction, but for

wrestling, doesn't work because I'm exposing myself because I have no grips. I'm

like. And things that he probably teach in the first class.

And that's for me, what, what. What really is

amazing because once you. Sometimes you reach a certain level,

it. At least in my case sometimes it's very difficult to go back to the.

The real white bell mentality. Okay, let me teach this guy. Without

expecting to know. Right, Right. And I get myself a lot of that.

And like I said, it's every day. Is a learning, you know, and there's so

much there. I mean, one of the things it brings up is like,

I mean, I've taken almost every single kettlebell

certification out there. Pretty much probably like, I don't know, seven. This is years

ago, but like seven different ones, every level, all of that.

And then I would retake them. People would ask, why are you retaking the exact

same course? And I was like, well, one, I'm in a different

stage of life right now, and there's only so much that I can

retain in one session or in one sert. The

other thing is, it could be a different instructure, even teaching the same technique,

but taught through their progression or taught through just the

way they articulate. Taught by. Because we all learn

via just like kids, what we see, what we hear, what we feel, what we

intuit. And so just watching someone else

demonstrate a technique, I'm learning just by what's coming

in. Yeah. And so the same technique taught by a different

person or dotted a different time. And to get these

people that you're learning from to get the ground zero of how they would break

down the fundamentals and see what's their process of teaching,

I really resonate with that. There's one thing, though, that I'm really

curious. When you were talking about your mindset going into a match much,

what's your relationship overall or in Jiu Jitsu with fear, do you

get fearful? Do you get anxious? And how have you

learned through life to, to navigate when you're

feeling fear? It's funny, everybody asks

me that. My problem is when I'm not with fear, that's

usually when I'm not anxious. That's usually because

the fear I think, like with, again,

preparation, right? I did the training camp and I did the

best thing possible to put myself in the worst case

scenarios to create solutions, right? So now I

have that confidence that, you know, okay, I, I

work hard and I. And I mapped everything it could

possibly do. So there's the, the technical confidence on it, right? But

there's always something that could happen, right? Right. And I think

that's where in my case, like, sometimes I have to actually

trick myself to feel a little bit more anxious because

that bring a state of awareness. So a lot of time,

you know, the overconfidence could be a problem, right?

Because now you lose your, like, okay,

you know what I mean? Like, you know, like, maybe you know, more than me,

like, the awareness, you know, your, your, your eyes are like, focus, you know,

like, okay, boom. You know, So I always have fear, you know, I have

of many things. They're like, oh, I'm so in shape that I might just tap,

you know, I don't want this to happen, you know, And I think, like,

because I, I train, you know, in a way,

and so good people have a stage of confidence that's so hard, so,

so big that again, I trick myself

into, okay, what if that happened? And I start to just play

along situation that may go wrong just to bring

that little, okay, it's not gonna happen now. I'm already in it, right? I'm focused.

I'm. Of course, I think other, other things in, you

know, that I've learned through yoga. You know, I learned that,

you know, prana very early in my life. You know, I think the first time

I ever stepped in a yoga, I was like 18, 17. I remember

being in a position and just shaking after 2 minutes, 2 seconds. And I

got. And the teacher like, hey, you gotta breathe. And breathe. What the is that

breathing even means? You know? And I said, no, we're doing nasal

and understanding. And then I know I'm with Ste. Steve

Maxwell in Philadelphia talking ice baths in the

-2 degrees Celsius in Philadelphia. Like, what the are we

doing? Just breathe. Just be present. I'm like, no, it's impossible. And as

you know, we start to regulate that through breathing, right? And I can

see you wearing that, And I'm curious about how that work. Maybe I'll use one,

you know. So I think like just the regulation of it's very important, but fear

is part of it, you know, I think fear is my friend. You know what

it's using as a tool? Fool, right? Not uses an enemy. Right? Because

everybody, when you rephrase it, I think what

I have always been very good in my life is about

reframing what that means to you. Right? So

fear is not my enemy, right? Fear is actually your friend, you know,

because that's the one that tell you, hey, be careful. Right? Be

careful. But when it takes over. And now that's an issue. Right Now

I'm like to fear for now I'm like, oh, I don't want to go there,

right. Usually there's a saying, what's

courageous? Fear, right? So to be courageous, you

gotta, you gotta go through the fear, you know? And I think fear is my

friend, you know, that's how I rephrase it. You know,

back in the day, fear. To make my throat dry. Now it becomes the

physical things of fear, right? So I think

let's touch on that. When fear change

your physical reaction to something, maybe, you

know, maybe your heart beats too high or maybe now your. Your

mouth is dry. That's an issue. Issue, right? And then,

but again, maybe you go to a first competition and then you go to second

competition. Now you, you, you expose more to this

uncomfortable situation. Like let's say a cold bath, right?

So for me, like, oh, cool. Bad. Now they're saying that cold bath's bad for.

Bad for you. I'm like, well, it's a challenge, right? Right. Like

Tony Robbins make you walk on fire. Wim Hof makes

you take a ice. Bath, climb up a mountain in shorts. In shorts.

Yeah. You know what I mean? For me, it's just a challenge that now it

brings you that like, oh, I can. And then we can go

into dopamine or whatever. Those hormones will kick it in. And now it makes you

like, whoa. You know, I remember the first time. Like, man, I'm so scared.

I'm so scared. I'm so scared. And I went to a fight, my throat. And

I beat the guy. And I'm like, holy. It's so great.

So fear turns into something amazing. So I think fear is a

fuel. Fear is a friend, you know what I mean? Just learn

how to negotiate with that. You know what I mean? And

regulate your emotions through those amazing

feelings, you know? They're good. They're Good. You know, anxiety,

the same anxiety. Why? Anxiety is the expectation of the future.

I'm like, no, okay. Oh, I'm anxious. Oh,

my God. No. Okay. Why am I anxious? Oh, I'm afraid to lose. Sure, I

can lose, but also can win. Let me stick with winning.

And if I lose a. I came. Up with the day with it.

We had a team meeting. I say true effort, never fail. That's why when you

lose, you learn. But you won't really learn if you really

put the ride through effort into something, you know? So then.

And then I also goes back to the social aspect of Jiu jitsu. Now there's

a friend. Hey, man, you can do this. You know, I remember my first

state tournament, right? This guy, I said, man, look at the guy. He looks strong.

I say, you're better than him. I saw him. You're better than him. You're gonna

kill him. I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna kill him. Right now. You just need

a little angel to tell you, hey, you can do this. Right? And that's what.

Go back to what we're talking about. Be social. The

kids, you know, have a kid that would be like, maybe your son is like,

oh, no, I don't know. And then you have one key day. Let's go. I'll

do it too. He's like, yeah, you know, I got a buddy, you know, So

I think it plays along. So I think being part of a team

surround with the right people, that can make you

see things differently. You know, sometimes you learn for yourself. Sometimes

you need the angel. And I. And I'm very happy that I had both.

Wow. I mean, sometimes, like you're saying, it could just be one word.

Yeah. Or just one word from one person that can

completely change the trajectory of someone's life.

Right. And a lot of what I'm hearing, too, even just the

discussion up to this point, it keeps coming back to

the warrior. The warrior mentality. Like you said, there's. How can there be

courage without fear? How do we learn to step into that? How do we learn

to reframe and find, you know, the.

The angle of either positive or the angle that'll

help get us through to the next step. How would you define. Like, what

is a warrior to you? What are the qualities, characteristics? What

does it mean for a man to step into the. The

archetype of the warrior? Whoa. That's.

That's a. It's a tough one, but it. It's tough because

it's difficult to put in war Center. That I try to leave,

you know, it's, it's meant, it's men's attributes, you know, let's talk about

like being, being a servant is a warrior, you know what I mean? Be

someone that gives safety. Your family is a warrior. Someone that faced the

challenge. And like I said, with all the, I think with all the attributes

you're talking about, be humble, you know, be the white belt mentality because you

need to prepare yourself to everything that goes. And that's the warrior, you know, that's

someone that does not shy away from the challenge, that takes accountability

for the mistakes, you know, and learn from it, you know. So I

think the everyday warriors, the only wakes up and know there's

hard things to do and he's going to do it anyway. And someone that if

they get criticized, they can, you know, tap into their

student behavior and then go and do

it, you know. I think a warrior guy is just the one that

is willing to do the work. You know what I mean? Some people

are not willing to do the work. Like sometimes when,

when I teach a guy, oh, I got it. I'm like, no, you didn't. That's

not the mentality. Okay, what do I have to do? You know? So I think

being a good listener, you know, and just strive, be strong

physically, be strong mentally, understanding that also being

vulnerable is strength, you know, I did a speech

on the wedding of Victor Hughes the day let's imagine you, you have a beautiful

family, you know, and you're like, sometimes you just want to lay down,

you know, curl your bed and just have someone pat you out. That's also being

a warrior because you have built a family and a God that's

around you that say, okay, my man needs some, some love, you

know. Maybe just a 30 second pattern. You'll be okay. I'm back, right?

So I think there's a lot of. This that I think being a man, right?

And it goes back to like even. The, the

world today, even in what. It is to be a man, what. It is to

be a woman, what's our roles in the society, right? Like,

I think for me that the battle today is going

back to what we truly are like as a man, as a woman, you know,

and understanding that, like there's differences, you know, and

like I said, be able to be the person to

the people around you that will be an asset and they'll

take them to be just

better, you know, Like, I'm not super tough.

I'm unbreakable. I'm like, no, what is that you're gonna

go crazy if you think like that, you know, like. So I think

surround yourself doing. I think it's just basically goes down to

do the hard work every day, you know, I mean, knowing that every day is

be difficult and if it's too easy, I'll find a

way to become difficult, you know, I'll, I'll do a challenge. That's why I

also like within the

fitness world, for example, you know what I mean? It's the most primal

way to do something different difficult. Right? Sometimes people would

not listen. Okay, let's shut up your. Sometimes

when I'm sad or I'm angry or something, I'll grab the air dying and just

die on it because I want to shut my brain off, you know, by.

I'm trying to survive the dying, you know, I just, I just, I just named

the air dying Dina. You know, I just grab Dina and I'll go hard on

her, you know, and then she goes hard back on me. And as, you know,

like, okay, now I, I give space. Do they go

back to my center and, and then articulate something that's challenging

my life and I can do better, you know, So I think as a man,

you gotta be physical, you gotta be strong, you gotta be

protective, but also understand that you choose

the people around you and, and I think it's important

for us to be able to trust that, you know, like you

choose your partner, you mold them and she mold you

into this, this connective, you know, cell that

support one another. Sometimes you, you 100, she's 0,

sometimes you 10, she's 90. You know what I mean? I think that's what's important.

Knowing that even though today you just. Want to cuddle or

cry, that doesn't. Change who you are, you know, and. She'S not going to use

it. Oh, well, you're being a little, you know, that's sometimes when, when

I see the world today, this, this unalignment where

us as men, like we. Sometimes you want to be soft, but we're taking

over on it. You know, sometimes the woman wants to be soft and

this aggressive and maybe like, oh, I'm your boss, right? So he keeps this

battle and that's not the warrior way. You know, the war away is knowing. That

you created something spectacular and you can. And

that's your base, that's your foundation. And you allow to

trust everything around because you're the one that built it,

you know, and also have the, the, the, the, the humbleness again to

like, okay, what, what's wrong and I will stand up and I want to know

even defeat, keep your head up. You know, for me, that's the warrior. You know,

winning keep your head up is sometimes easy. And that can bring

it, you know, suburb. But you gotta also understand that that's possible.

But I was also okay a lot. There's no excuses. I did my best.

I'll go back and I'll do it again, you know. And I think that's the

mentality that, that we think. Like I, I wanna, I

wanna build a business that's gonna change everyone's lives, you know,

I'm accomplishing. Accomplish basically everything I could have in jiu jitsu. But I

wake up every day, you know, I want to make sure every single person in

my team wins, you know. And like I said, define victories, okay?

That they come into a work that, you know, environment is good for

them. Like right now we even have the little baby here. The baby basically is

growing up here. Which job? You can bring your baby to your job.

We can, you know, I teach and I put the baby in my, my shoulder

and while she do sales and do something, I'm taking care of, of

it. We all working together because we are family, you know.

And I think that's what's important for us, a man to, to. To understand that

we have a big role in the safety of the

society, you know. And I really appreciate the job that you do.

Hope one day I can join one of your adventures, you know, and learn,

you know, like again goes back like to

the idea that like, for example, you talk, oh, you, you still take, take,

you know, the classes of the beginners, you know what I mean? Like,

people look at me, oh, Sean's a great man. Well, maybe sometimes, like I have

to go some somewhere to listen to something different, to embrace

another man. And like, hey bro, we're together on this, you know what I mean?

And let's go do this together and let's suffer together. Let's, you know,

I think it's just build experiences is very important for the warrior, you know, the

warrior that sits at home and doesn't challenge himself is not a warrior. It's

probably a warrior, right? That's why we say and yeah,

that's our d. You know, it's our duty. Every single man that steps in here

and say, your responsibility, you know, because I got to take to, to my

kind right to my side of it as the man here. If there's no

womb on the mat, it's your fault. You know what I Mean, if you're going

home and you let. It's your fault, you know, take the role as

a provider, you know, and. Again, provided as doesn't mean the

guy. That makes the most money on the relationship is someone that's like, hey,

baby, I'm here for you because I know you're there for me as well, you

know, And I think the warrior plays, you

know, a lot of roles. I guess that's why it's a difficult task.

Oh, man, that was such a. Yeah, there's

so much there. One thing that you said at the end there about

struggling together, like, that's one thing that I

think is really what, at least in my observation, in my experience,

is what forges such a deep connection among

men. Like, when we at the retreats, we do a sweat lodge together,

and 90% of us want to tap out. But when you don't

see anybody else going and you stay, like. And sometimes you'll

move and another guy just grabbed you, like, no, no, you got this, like, we're

okay. And then it gives you that bit of reassurance, like, okay,

if he's not going, he's got my back. And then all these guys got my

back. And to go through that

crucible, to be hard and to go through a

common struggle together, every single time

we've come out, you look at. Well, I'll look at myself

differently, I'll look at the other men differently. Then I look at the world

differently because we've actually gone through something, whether it's an

initiation experience, a rite of passage, and in those

experiences, there's some form of metaphoric death.

There's some part of you that had to die in order for

this new part to emerge. And when you do that and you struggle together,

when you said that, I was like, yes. Then the other thing that came up

is this is why my son, who's three, almost three years old now

comes to every retreat because, I mean, he's a

separate from the work that we do. And then on the breaks, he's with my

wife, who does the cooking. But I always wanted,

like, I was like, why am I doing this work? Why?

Well, one of the biggest reasons is to do my

part, to pass on the legacy, the teachings of what it means to

be a good man, a good father, a good servant to society.

And I'm doing it for my family, largely. So why wouldn't I

want them a part of it? Yeah. So it's been so

fulfilling to. In these experience, after the sweat lodge,

coming back, eating food with the guys. And then you have just this

innocent two and a half year old just wants to

play and hold you and talk with the guys. It's been one of the most

special things. But you know, I share with the guys. Like you're coming into my

family. Family. Right. And I really. What's the

work that we're doing? It's so we can love and lead our wives

more powerfully and so we can love and lead our children more

powerfully. And so I really want there to be

less. Less masks,

less separation between who you think I am and who I

actually am. Exactly. And there's only way to do that, in my opinion. Not the

only way by any means, but the way that feels most true and

authentic and meaningful to me is if you get

to feel me and my family. And so

I love what you're saying. You have one year old over here is a part

of it. Because that's, I mean, why are we doing this? Yes. For ourselves,

but also to share it. Definitely. Yeah. So that's something that.

So if you come, which you're always welcome to. Would love that you'll get to.

To meet him for sure. Yeah. You know, and like I said, like, I think

that true leadership is like, you know, empower people to struggle for

or one ideal. You know what I mean? And, and, and I think in

your case too, like, you, you have a skill like, like

you're not really teaching anyone to be a man. You're creating an

environment, facilitate so they can find themselves. Nailed

it. Within each other. Yep. You know what I mean? Like, and that's what

it is. Goosebumps thinking about it. You know what I mean? Like,

like, like let the mass goes down. Like I tell the guys here,

I say, look, you guys, look at me as this ch. Champion. But if I

have to come here and act, okay, okay, I'm acting of service every day. Every

day. They say that life is a. Is a. Is an act that never ends.

Right. But it's a true act. Your true self has to

come up all the time. Like, imagine if I have to come here every day

and like, oh yeah, I'm this perfect guy. And I tell the guys, I don't

want you guys to be here because I'm a champion. I want you guys to

be here. When I'm actually not a champion. Because what I'm giving to

you is just. It's just Jiu jitsu, you know, and that's it, you know,

And I happen to have more experience in the world than all of you. Guys,

and Jiu Jitsu has given me. Those experiences in life, then

maybe you guys never had it because maybe you. Live in a corporate world, maybe

you don't have access to different cultures, right? So I'm just

here to facilitate that and be with you guys right, in

this process. And I think that's it's, it's such an important work for us,

you know, it's not the ultimate truth. True. It's just a way, right? You know

what I mean? It's just a way that the war away. Hey, what we do,

we're gonna do some, some hard stuff. We're gonna work out, we're gonna talk. And

we're gonna have good food. We're gonna embrace one another. No

masks, no, it doesn't matter your. 100000 watch,

it's not gonna save you from the heat, buddy. Not gonna do the work for

you. You know, so also I think like I said, the leadership is like, how

do we empower people to struggle together. For something that

like it's a common struggle to everyone to win, you know. And that's

all it is, you know. And, and the other side too

that we need to worry about is now the people that do this type of

work and now they think they have nothing else to, to evolve. Right? You

could basically, yeah, you know, I'm here. Those guys are doing exactly what I say.

No, I'm still doing my work. You know, I'm still going home. I'm still developing.

I'm still having a white belt mentality. Even though you being a leader,

you know, and me, I'm a leader of an organization. I have, you know, whatever,

19 countries and every day right now I just got three more

books about communication and working environment. Something that I never really thought I need

to say, okay, maybe I need to communicate better with my guys, you know, where

am I going wrong? Am I putting the sensei boss together? My

personality? So now it's kind of like understanding how to communicate

better so I can be efficient to everybody. You know, there's always something to learn.

And I sit down and I'm like, hey guys, guys. The only thing I know

that I don't know anything. So let's learn together. I'm in a position

in this level, but there is a lot of different levels. You know, I had

a meeting, right now I have one of my Instructors. He'S a 50 year old

badass lawyer. You know, sometimes, hey, you're a wiser guy, you know, you're

older. What do you think about this he gives me his opinion, you know,

and I put the white belt on, you know, and I say okay, and

that's it. But. And then what's great about those relationships.

Interactions, that this does not change how. He sees

me, you know, And I. Think that's very important. And I think

is that's a lot. Of what happens a lot in the. World is this, you

know, that when. And I think that's where the fear in

the society today and the uncertainty happens. Because we be

hurt so much because we. We put our guard down

and that's seen as a weakness, not as a way to connect.

Right. You know, and I think that's where. Where. Where we need to.

To tap into this. It's okay. Okay. Be strong, you know,

like, put your. Guard down is a way to let. It in, you know, hey,

if they. Abuse their energy, I just put my hand out, say, you're not part

of my circle anymore, and that's okay, you. Know, and also we need to know.

That sometimes people just don't line, and that's okay.

Right? That's why there's, you know, A and. Bs People that, you know,

raise in the society, people that don't raise the society, because not everybody's the same,

you know, maybe doesn't work for me, you. Know, Hey, I came here from

your retreats. I didn't get anything. Well, we go to war, not

everybody. Not everybody comes out alive. And that's how it goes. And that goes back

to like when I teach a class, maybe my communication

resonates with 50%. Maybe the other don't get

it, but doesn't mean it's good or bad. Just mean that maybe the tone of

my voice, maybe whatever the expectation, maybe their day, maybe

Vito Hugo is teaching right now. Maybe the other 50% gets it, you

know, And I think that's how a team works, works, you know, And I think

we all have something to learn every day. Hell yeah.

Hell yeah. Sanji, one thing that I'd love to. As we head towards the end

of the show is, you know, I've had the pleasure of getting to work with

you with the Bulgarian bag. I'm curious, what is your, you know, you got a.

You got a fight coming up soon. What's been mainly

your conditioning and also what did you get or what do you get from

training with the bag? I mean, you've trained all different types of modalities, but I'd

love to hear a bit about your training right now and what

have you really found from training with something like that? There is that. I

was like the, I would say the Eastern

European style of, of training. Yeah. You know, like I

said, I think, I think grappling martial

arts is a very unique form of a thing

where I just don't like the battles everywhere. Like,

just a little critic on the, on the fitness world today now that, ah, this

is sucked. This is not. I say, guys, there's no right or wrong. That's what's

good for you. You. Right. You know, there's like, oh, I'm deal with me. True.

Because I'm done. That so doesn't matter. Maybe what works for you doesn't work for

the other person. Why Six Blades has 100 students. That, that school has 101

students. Because maybe that's what they like better. One

thing that I always like that they call unorthodox

is because it's a battle. You know, I think

kettlebell and bulgaria bag, I think they, they fall in the same

category for me because it doesn't matter how,

how tired you get. You gotta stick with the technique, right. You

can't muscle because if you muscle, you're tired. If you're tired, you end up

going away. I can go into like the gripping, the

core, the control, right. Like you moving things around,

you know, like so the, the different rotations that your

body is doing, right? So you, you work your body as a role, as a

whole the whole time. It's a hundred percent of time, right? You're

moving a thing, you're struggling. Now you're going to mental. You go into,

you go into stages that I don't think just lift you would do. Because,

you know, I do bodybuilding too. You know, it's important to like, you

know, get, you know, a little more like a

raw strength, let's say that's. I don't even know if that's the right word. Okay,

I'm pushing, I'm pulling, I'm engaging. Boom. I have individual

things to control my joints. But for grappling, after a while,

those planes, they're very limited. Where you

always in different, right? So if you look at just like, just this

rotation, this is a basic rotation here. Look how much my,

my shoulder has. To move and I have to control, engage

and, and create that. Oh, okay. My, my mind

goes crazy when I think it just does this little energy ball that happens all

the time. It's just like fighting. So you become one with the bag, you become

one with the kettlebell, where just pulling and

pushing it doesn't. It for me, doesn't feel the same.

Like the mace too. I. I like playing the mace, right? So

there's different movements. That's the same thing with jiu jitsu grappling. You

holding. The thing is moving. Now you have to, like, adjust and. Move and

counterbalance and see the energy going the direction. You have to. To work

with that, you know. So when I train,

also going back to like, a little bit of the Russian, the Eastern

European philosophy is that for

me, condition just raising the floor. So

for me, conditioning is about raising my floor.

And on the mat is how I. Raise my ceiling,

right? But now if I think that being too. Of course,

being too conditioning is not never bad.

But for the moment, that now I have to

compensate. I think there's something there unbalanced, that

now I have to do too much condition to overcome my skill. Because,

man, I've seen so many cardio

machines getting tired in three minutes. Because it's very

specific, you know, if you don't grab a leg in a single leg, you know,

I can do like. Let's say you do like a low pull.

You can do all of that. Again, it's just raising the

floor. Because now I can't withstand that volume. I can't withstand

that power. But there's so many things that change.

Because you can be the strongest guy in the world. But if I move into

an angle that you off balance, that strength goes away.

Because now you have to come, oh, now the guy escapes. Same thing with the

bag. Like, when I move in the bag, the mav is rotating. Maybe my technique

is off. Now it's going more centrifugal difficult, and I have to

compensate that, you know, so there's micro adjustments that

you do all the time with the kettlebell, with the. With the

Bulgarian bag. But for me, the number one, it's when

the mind takes over whatever

you feel. And then the spirit comes over even from the mind. Because now it's

just breathing and just. It's just reaction. Now

you. You won with them, you know, and. Again, again, you should

think about you're. Gonna do like a. A swing

without a hip push. Like, if you want to, like, do a jerk without, like,

the proper pop, you're gonna get tired. Now you versus like,

you know, and then becomes like, oh, I'm just one. With this, you know, and

then becomes like, I don't know. You go to a different world. That is hard

to describe. You know, for me, the bag, the. Mace,

and the kettlebells are the only ones that can really

take me to a spiritual space within

Myself, that's for sure. Well, I think in that, in

that light, it's a window.

It was for me, honestly, like physical movement, physical training was the window into

this work, into the more spiritual stuff, doing

moving, meditation, for example, with or without a kettlebell or

with or without a Bulgarian bag. But that was the window in. Because

before then, when I was much younger, I would have looked,

you know, maybe a little over 20 years ago, but I would have looked at

meditation and it was just really foreign. It felt

I just couldn't connect with it. But through movement and integrating

breath and rhythm and timing and getting to that place where what you

said, as soon as your hands touch the bag or the

bell or the mace, you're now, because when you don't touch it, you're

two separate systems. You have the bag as its own system. You

are one system. But as soon as you connect, connect,

you unite that into one system. And so if you can

integrate breath with movement and learn some of the nuances and the

details of how to use your body weight and how to use

momentum to move the bag, then exactly what you said

you can tap into. Whether you want to call it a flow state. There's a

part, I think, of our brains that relaxes

and then it goes into this harmonic rhythm.

And I've had some of the most powerful or

memorable, like spiritual or just aha moments

while training and while training in that state.

So it can be absolutely an access point into that.

Amazing. Sanjay, this has been so much fun. I'm so

grateful for your time and of course, you know, I know we had a delay

and yeah, I just appreciate you welcoming,

always welcoming me in. And you know, as we close the day, just in light

of the conversation we had about fear and men and

jiu jitsu, is there one thing that really stands out to

you that you would want to leave the men who are listening as just

a take home message from today? Well, it's being a very,

a big, you know,

subject this week because it's the humility, you know, it's not.

Humility is not behavior like,

you know, I'm simple. I don't like watches.

Humility is about understanding, as always, growth. You know,

humility is about knowing that

there's always someone that can teach you something. You know what I mean? That it's

always something to be learned within this world, you know, And

I think a man that's not humble, I think

they're going to die from their own poison, you know, I think it's

extremely important, you know, like, the arrogance of, like, I know

it all. It's important, you know, to surround yourself

with men that you can trust. So I think that humility and

trust are very important because once you surround, like, I can have this

conversation with you and open my heart and talk about my insecurities and, and open

up because that's a safe space that we can talk because we have built

a relationship of humbleness through to fitness, through conversations, to the

combo. You know, I think that's extremely beautiful

for men to really do, you know, tap into your true self,

you know, surround yourself to people that you are

safe to be humble in the idea that, like, I

can learn something every day. Sanji. Thank you,

brother. Thank you, my brother. Appreciate you so much. Appreciate you so much. Thank you.

Thank you everyone that's watching us and hope we do that more

often.