Okay. So I just got off Instagram stories and I was talking about how I've noticed this like pendulum swing internally as I'm about to show up and, create content or even like work on whatever offer that's been gestating. And what I was saying is that this pendulum swing is like on the far left is me, just noticing all the perfectionism creeping in and wanting things to be a certain way and wanting things to be figured out. It's not even like about being perfect anymore. I think I've moved through that. It's about like having things figured out and having almost control over what I guess like the strategy of it and how it's all going to be laid out and like what's going to come next and how it all flows. And yeah, I get myself really attached to this, like, figure it out energy. And the other side of the pendulum is being really vulnerable. And. I wouldn't say like airing my dirty laundry, but that's a fear of mine of almost being too vulnerable to the point of sharing stuff that isn't fully integrated and it not necessarily having like value and me not necessarily gleaning wisdom from it yet because I'm still in the middle of it. And I recognize that Both of those are extremes and obviously like I'm really intentional about not showing up from those places. I'm just being a radical witness to my own inner world as I noticed myself kind of flip flopping and I can see so clearly that like I said, they're both, they're both extremes and those extremes are quite harmful because it's self censoring me. And it's a disservice to you and my community because I'm not sharing potential gold and, and wisdom because I'm too busy trying to, I'm overthinking it. Really, I'm overthinking it. And yeah, like I said, just being kind of a radical witness to this experience and knowing that like, as I bring awareness to it, it gives me an opportunity to make a different choice and kind of break the patterns as I see them happening in real time. And so, yeah, I shared all that on Instagram stories and also reflected on literally in real time, as I was saying it out loud, like, you know, Realize that, oh wait, like what's actually happening here is this, this flavor of like wanting to reconnect with like a playful energy, a playful and like innocent energy that I used to be able to show up online with while also still like taking things seriously. Because I recognize that like, as I continue to learn, as an, as I continue to just. Gain more confidence in what I do and who I can serve and like my quote unquote purpose in this world. That confidence teeters me into this like weird pressure of wanting to take things seriously. Like it makes me not want to fuck up. It makes me feel like there's now this like reputation almost to maintain. And I can totally see that I'm putting that on myself. And it's also part of the water we swim in and the societal conditioning that, I mean, has conditioned us to be pretty perfect and pleasing and kind of have our shit figured out before we share it. And the bro marketing culture of just having like this, like perfect strategy and like these perfectly executed funnels and everything's like polished and. Anyways, like I can see all that. I can see where it's mine and where it's not mine. And what I've kind of just been sitting with is how this, this is literally it. This is why the old paradigm of business needs to go because it's stripping us from being able to tap into that playful energy. It's stripping us from being able to tap into like our wildness and our, and our intuitive nature that that we have access to, that like creative portal, that open, clear channel that we have access to when we aren't taking things so seriously. Because as soon as we're taking things so seriously, it puts us in this like straight and narrow. And it like, at least for me, like it puts me in this energy of like, this is how things have to go. And I find myself like attaching to outcomes and attaching to timelines and. feeling really unsafe to change my mind, feeling really unsafe to, to pivot or even like jump ship on something. And I also recognize that again, that's the water we swim in. We've kind of been taught to follow through on things and to like push through to finish what you started. And yeah, that is just such a disservice to our, like animal body in the sense of the connection we have with our intuition and the connection that we have to like our creativity and our like body's wisdom Because when we're in that like taking it too seriously kind of energy We're basically suppressing That inner voice and saying like no whatever you need right now doesn't matter because this is where we're going I almost think of it's almost like that like Because I said so mother energy right like it's This is what we're doing because I said so and there's no room for flexibility There's no room for play like you're just it's rigid and it's oh I can feel like the contraction in my body right now just like thinking about it like it doesn't feel good And the thing about content and offer creation, when we show up in that energy, that rigidity and that, that, that contraction and that, it's almost like stale, stale is the word that's coming to mind. That's literally what I'm like feeling right now. It's, it's stale and that staleness is not magnetic at all. It's not attractive. Like, I don't want to hang out with. Someone that is rigid and stale, and taking things so seriously that they're so in their head that they can't even pay attention to happening around them. And, I put a question box in my stories earlier today Asking for people to share what they think of when they think of like bro marketing tactics. And one of the responses was around consistency and how, like in the bro marketing world, and by the way, the boss babe world is the bro marketing world. The boss babe, boss babe culture is literally bro marketing with a dress on it. So you might hear me using both, both terms kind of interchangeably, but in yeah, the boss, boss, babe, bro marketing world, there's this like unspoken rule about consistency and it's not even unspoken. It is absolutely spoken. It's an obsession with consistency and it's consistency to the point of like sacrificing your own body and consistency to the point of Ignoring what's happening around you and not being attuned to your environment and not just like locally but like On a micro and macro level right? It's not paying attention or giving space or even like naming Some of the greater world events that are happening and it's like I mean, I'm sure as I'm saying this, you can think of examples where you've seen this happen, right? It happens all the time and it's become so normalized that it's literally what's mainstream. And so, coming back to this, this conversation around playfulness and like taking things seriously, those of us that are choosing to find play and pleasure in our business, are doing things that are really counter cultural. They are not mainstream. And so as we're doing them, it can potentially feel like, Oh my God, I'm doing something wrong. Like this isn't going to work. And like self doubt can start flooding in and This is where we start gripping on to other people's strategies and wanting like a proven framework because it doesn't feel safe to play. It doesn't feel safe to be flexible and pivot and be impulsive. Like we, we have been taught like that impulsivity is irresponsible or impulsivity, impulsivity and like playfulness is not mature, it's immature and it's, we also equate like immaturity and. irresponsibility with not having success, right? We equate success with being mature. We equate success with being responsible and yeah, I just want to name all this out loud because this is literally stuff I'm working on right now where I, like I said, I'm noticing this pendulum and I'm noticing a bit of a block and showing up online and not out of like not wanting to be seen or anything like that, but this own like inner. Friction of, yeah, these, these two parts of me at all. It's wanting to take things serious and also wanting to be playful. And I absolutely do think that there is a way to marry both. I think I shared this last week in a podcast episode. This, like, give no fuck energy. Mixed with deeply giving a shit and I think that's it, right? It's giving no fucks in the sense of I don't actually care About other people's perception of me. I don't actually care if they think I'm absolutely crazy for changing my mind again I don't care if they are making fun of me for I don't know like Graphics that don't match and like a Google Doc for a sales page Like I don't actually care or give no fucks about what other people are thinking about me You And I deeply give a shit. I deeply give a shit about the work I'm doing in the world and the people that I can impact and the wisdom that I have to offer and the ripple that has, again, on a micro and macro level. And so it's this marriage of being really serious about the impact that my, my work, my wisdom, my voice, my medicine can have on people and tapping into that like playfulness give no kind of energy where. I'm more concerned about myself and my own integrity and my own like inner peace than I am like what's outside of me and if you've hung out with me for any length of time you know that I am a recovering good girl and so and a recovering people pleaser and Fawning is absolutely my default nervous system response when I'm activated. And so this is an edge for me. This is a big edge in recognizing where I'm kind of giving my power away when I'm fawning and trying to appease someone else and trying to like not rock the boat. And so this is where that give no fucks energy is really, really potent for me to tap into. I'm just sharing this because I think. It's important to name and I, I really want to, I don't even know. Again, coming back to that edge around vulnerability where there's a fear that I'm being too vulnerable. I also know that vulnerability is one of my superpowers and I know that sharing some of the stuff out loud helps to break the cycle of silence that you might be moving through if you are feeling these things too, but haven't been able to. share it with someone or haven't had the language to understand it for yourself. And so it is really important to me that I'm sharing this stuff out loud. Even if in real time, I'm kind of finding the wisdom for us as I speak it out that that's my medicine. And actually, again, literally hearing myself say that out loud, I'm recognizing I'm a self projected projector and human design. Of course, I get wisdom from hearing myself speak out loud. So. Oh gosh, that's just a big permission slip for me to keep talking about this stuff. Keep talking about like my own processes and keep talking about the, the friction of my own inner world and the stuff that I'm witnessing internally because yeah, there's medicine here for me. There's medicine here for you. There's medicine here for the collective. And so that's all for today. I'm so glad you're here. If you've been kind of connecting and vibing with some of the stuff I've been sharing lately, just around. Like breaking up with hustle culture and laying like the boss babe mindset and bro marketing stuff to rest and just kind of untangling self worth and productivity. I have some very exciting offers coming up. I'm working on a podcast series called boss babe funeral. Cause I know I'm not the only one where even though I haven't identified as a boss babe, I never had that like boss babe era. I stepped into entrepreneurship being very intentional about not showing up to my business in that way and being very intentional about not yeah, just kind of perpetuating this hustle and grind. culture that exists and being very conscious about the way I've built my business thus far. I can still feel where, like I said, it's the water we swim in. So even though I'm not needing to have a funeral for my inner boss babe because she doesn't exist, I'm ready to have a funeral for the collective boss babe culture because it still seeps in. It still makes me. self doubt myself. It still makes me think like, oh my god, like why is this so counter cultural? Why isn't everyone else talking about this? Why does this feel so crazy? So yeah, stay tuned for that. And then I'm also hosting a fucking retreat in January. I can't believe I just said that out loud. More to come on that. It is totally unconventional, no plane tickets needed, no accommodations needed because it's all virtual. It just feels really, really juicy for the time of year and for the women that I'm calling into the container because y'all don't need more training, you don't need more business strategy, you don't need really more of anything except for the space to reconnect with yourself and really tend to and nourish and attune to your inner world. We know that our outer World is just a reflection of our inner world. So we really need to start focusing on that as our quote unquote strategy for the success and the abundance and the, the time freedom and the whatever else you're moving after, whatever you're calling in, it all starts with like those internal shifts. And so I'm really envisioning this retreat being like soul nourishing, regenerative, reparative, expansive. And I keep having this visual of like all these loose threads that I'm sure so many of us have already been working at untangling, right? If you've been on a self acclimation journey or spiritual awakening or any kind of like healing journey, you have all these threads that you've been kind of working on. untangling and now they're just like here ready to be woven into something new. And this is what I'm, I'm dreaming up for this retreat is, is tying these loose ends together and weaving a new reality and yeah, just really reclaiming our power and calling in what's ours and moving towards a business and a life. With less extraction and less hustle and more play and again, marrying that give no fuck kind of energy with deeply giving a shit. And when that's fused together, what does that mean for our business? What does that mean for the type of offers we create? What does that mean for the way we market and the way we sell and the way we show up online? And so. This retreat is not more business strategy. It is for entrepreneurs who are really wanting to attune and tend to their inner world and uncensor their, their wild woman and their wildness because I think that wildness is where we can tap into that playfulness and that, that portal of creativity. And our wise woman is our inner wild woman. And so we, we're all wanting more strategy. We're all wanting more wisdom and we keep looking outside of ourselves for it. But really it's, it's inner wild woman. Our wild woman is our wise woman. Say that five times fast. Okay. So stay tuned. Some really exciting things happening in my world. And DM me on Instagram. You only connect with me in some way, whatever way. feels good for you and let me know if you're excited about these things because it really does help me just stay on track not in a people pleasing kind of way but in a like like excitement is contagious right and I obviously want you to feed off my excitement because it's real it's genuine but I also feed off yours so yeah let me know validate me let me know if this stuff is lighting you up as much as it is for me and if it feels like exactly what you need in this season of life and business. Okay. Thanks for listening. da. Heee. What would you say? Hi. What would you want to talk about? ABCDs. ABCDs? You'd want to talk about the alphabet? Hmm.