Hi, everybody.

Well, hello.

What's up?

Happy Pride.

Happy Pride. It's June 1st. It is June 1st. So exciting.

Pride is oozing out of me.

Okay, that didn't go great.

That's a tough use. I've got a new unmitigated call and it's Heath using the word oozing in the seconds.

Okay, moving on. So, anything to report in the last few weeks? We've gone to a few graduations, you guys. Yeah.

Happy to be through May.

That's true. How May was your hell month.

Yes.

And you have survived.

I've survived.

You're like Gloria Gaynor. You have survived.

I survived. You know it.

Oh, we're so glad.

On the other side.

Maybe May gave you a lot of gall.

I mean, a lot of gall. Unfortunately, a lot of gall I can't talk about. But.

Yeah. Is there any unmitigated gall that you can talk about, May or otherwise right now?

Yeah, it's sort of a personal goal and you know it. It's my armpits.

It's personal.

It is personal. I. In the middle of this hell month, my armpits have decided that, like, they just hate the deodorant I've been using. And I changed like a couple years ago to have like aluminum free deodorant and I use a sensitive one. I've had questions, to be clear, I've had questions about this deodorant because the stick seems to last a really long time. Like an alarming amount of time. Like almost six months, which I think is an incredibly long time for stick deodorant.

Yeah, yeah.

Compared to previous. But I was like, I mean, they formulated it, I put it on every day. I don't know. I'm not putting it on incorrectly. It's stick deodorant.

Right. Is it working?

No. So that's where. So first it started, where I kind of started getting a rash in my armpits.

Oh, man.

Listen, I. You know what? I love to hold stress and uncomfortableness in different parts of my body. So at first I thought, oh, this is new. I'll just get the rash in my pits. I guess that I, you know, and then I was like, at least I can cover it, I guess. And then I was like, no, this is different. It feels itchier or something. Then I started realizing, like, I'm sweating through shirts, which is not normal for me. And so I was like, what is happening in my armpits? And still didn't totally blame the deodorant. And then like a week And a half ago, I was getting ready to get in the shower and I'm like, do I smell a little bit? And I was like, okay, now we have a problem.

Deodorant, because you can't smell.

So if you smell. So then I felt like I did. My reaction was obviously to go to Mike and ask if I. I did because I needed to know the evidence of which he said, work that out on your own. Which is fair.

Yeah, fair.

That's fair. You don't want to stick your nose in my heart, but I understand. So I assume that it was because I felt like it was. And so I. So now I've been on this quest to find deodorant that works, but the problem is, is that my armpits are still sensitive from whatever happened with the other one. So it's hard to test one out because the rash is still happening, but it's also starting to get hot. And so I'm desperate for deodorant. And it's just been a cycle of gall that I'm mad at my pits and I'm mad at deodorant. And I don't know where to correctly assign the blame, but I've just decided that it's both.

This seems like yet another way of your body just exploding and, you know, doing everything it can to make itself known.

Right. And I also, I've been using this deodorant that I had been using for a good two years. So I was like, why did we. Why did it break down now?

I think it might be capitalism. Hear me out.

I am here for it.

I am in.

Yes. Okay.

I know. Since, you know, with inflation and corporate greed, yada, yada, yada. Like, I have bread that I like to buy that tasted one way for a long time and about six months ago, it tastes different now. And I think, I think, I believe it's because they changed the ingredients, they changed the recipe, and found a cheaper way to make it where it looks the same still. Yep. And I wonder if this is the deodorant you've been using for a long time and is now causing you problems if they found cheaper ingredients or they changed the recipe in some way that now it's causing you problems.

I am fully agreed. Fully agreed. It was Dove.

It's Dove.

Come on, Dove.

That's their whole thing is it's like natural and we're not gonna mess you up, man.

Yeah, it's aluminum free, sensitive, and it's.

Supposed to be like, yay, ladies.

Yeah, yeah. It's Not. Yay, ladies.

Well, Dove has succumbed to capitalism.

Yeah, that's exactly what happens.

That's exactly what happened.

That's exactly what happened. And look, I was taking it all myself. As a consumer, I was blaming.

That's what capitalism does. It tells you it's your fault.

Well, I mean, I'm sure you're all riveted listeners and I'll keep you updated on my deodorant journey, but I'm so.

Glad you shared your deodorant journey and we'll keep updating you.

Nothing if not a generous podcaster. Let me tell you weird thing.

You tell us about all sorts of body stuff.

Yeah.

I was remembering today how you peed your pants and you just told us all. Just told us all. And it was very. It was refreshing.

Well, an update on that.

Oh, which part? Her peeing her pants. Were you refreshed or were you hearing it when it was refreshed?

Both. Both.

My. My new granddaughter loves those tie blankets, so. And I said, good, cuz I peed my pants for that fabric.

So that's a story of telling her high school graduates.

I will. I plan on it.

I plan on being that grandma that's like in the corner with the A thing of punch.

Well, I'm peed. I had a full bladder of piss.

Let me tell y' all, when she was little, she loved these tie blankets. And I peed my pants in a Joanne. I know you don't know what Joann fabric is, but I peed my pants in a Joanne fabric for those back in the day. Back in the day.

Well, speaking of capitalism, my goal. I will. I will say that my goal is about 93 less than when I worked at my corporate job. So feel it. Feeling good about that.

But I think good for you, not good for goal.

Thank you. Yeah, that's true. Because I had to think. I had to think about, you know.

What is my goal. Yeah.

Yeah. And we now have to seek out gall. As podcasters of note, Gall finds me.

I'm not seeking a lot. I gotta be honest. I am not.

I just don't go out in the world that much, so the gall doesn't reach me as much. But the one time I went out in the world this week, men discussing loudly is my goal because they have opinions and you will hear them even if you're five tables away at Ritual Cafe.

Ritual Cafe, Yeah.

At least they were progressive discussions and opinions, which is rarer. You usually hear the MAGA guys, you know, talking loudly, but. But it reminds me of the Guy at the movie theater that was sitting next to us at Bombshell and was like, reprehensible just to show that, like, he was an ally. Like, he's super loud and performative. That's what these men speaking loudly is. So generally, I think men should just be quiet.

Agreed.

Take the advice that we girls always got. Be seen and not heard and just, you know, we want to.

I want to agree, but I also feel like I'm not following directions.

If I do that I should clarify. White straight men. White straight men speak. Don't speak. And we want to clock you. We want to know where you're at, but we don't want to hear your weirdness. So just. Just shush. We don't need you right now.

Yeah, like, there's places you can go have those conversations. Doesn't have to be in a public place where you're just serving a whole bunch of people.

Just start your podcast and, you know, talk to the world that way.

Don't start your podcast. I do not co sign that. But that space is flowing.

Join and already made white male podcast. And you were allowed to speak.

Okay.

You are not shushed.

Just to be clear, he's like, should I say my unmitigated call? I don't know.

I will say. On a semi related note, yesterday I was at the farmer's market and I was. Wait. I'd ordered a breakfast sandwich. I was waiting for it, and there was a group of young people nearby that I was listening this woman explain how she watched Top Maverick and she didn't really understand it because she had not seen the first Top Gun. And I was like, ma' am, that's Top Gun Maverick.

Was.

Was designed for you don't. There's not a lot to unpack there. Like, there. I mean, some of the references you're not gonna get, sure, maybe, but like, also, it's not.

If you have self contained.

Right. If you have trouble understanding Top Gun Maverick, that is on you.

That's a personal thing. That's not a movie thing. Yeah.

So Gaul, Tom Cruise, just fuck you.

We're done with your mission.

Don't want to see you. You're one of those that needs to shush and just, you know, not be seen. We don't want to see or hear you.

I saw a clip of somebody asking him how he's gonna celebrate Father's Day, and he just kind of laughed and he was just like, well, you know, I love what I do. And then walked away from the interviewer and it was like, huh.

He couldn't honestly remember that moment if he had kids or not.

Right?

Yeah. So, as I said, you're not shushed. So what's your goal?

Two. Two notes before I get to goal number one. Happy graduation. My niece, Lily, listener to the podcast. She did a great job last week.

Good job, Lily.

When she graduated.

We love all your academic achievements as well, Lily.

Yes, yes. Number two, when you were talking about sweating Aaron, it reminded me of a woman I worked with when I was in college. I worked in the maintenance office at University of Northern Iowa. And one of our part of our job was to drive a car, a university issued car. And we'd go out and buy things that mechanics on campus needed to fix things, right? So we would go to electrical stores or, you know, plumbing shops or hardware stores. And we were walking into the Ace Hardware in Cedar Falls, and it was a hot day. And the girl I worked with, shout out to Courtney Boycen if you're listening.

We named her.

I love it.

We get out of the van, the uni van that has, you know, vinyl seats in it. It's a hot day. And we're walking in and she points at her own back and says, and is my back sweaty? And she said it when we were walking into the Ace Hardware. And I don't know why, but I fucking lost it. Cause it was so goddamn funny. And I laughed and laughed and I've said it 100 times a year since then.

Is perfect sweat.

Was it just a sheet of sweat?

No, I didn't think so. She'd been sitting. I mean, the air conditioner in that van worked sometimes. I don't remember his working that day or not, but, you know, it was just like, I don't know. No one in Ace Hardware gives a shit if your back's sweaty. You didn't? No.

They've seen things, I imagine at Ace Hardware. Ye.

They are things. They haven't just seen things, they are things.

They create the things.

Yeah, they invite the things.

But I think my unmitigated gall, and this has been my unmitigated gall for a while, is whoever the fuck at Instagram decided to make the carousel 20 pictures long.

Yes.

I don't need 20 pictures of anything. Your trip, you don't have 20 good pictures from your trip. You got seven. Maybe, maybe. And there's too many to flip through. And if you don't flip through them the next time you open Instagram, it's just back there again asking you one more time. And I didn't. I don't Want this?

Nope.

The answer is no, Instagram. I don't want 20 pictures of anybody's anything.

No.

Okay. I'm just now having, like, a moment where I'm realizing I didn't realize that's what was happening with Instagram. I was so confused. I restarted Instagram a couple times because I'm like, why are there so many.

Yeah.

Why do you keep showing me this? I'm not interested. And it's because I haven't flipped through. Through all the pictures.

Yep. So you're not alone in your. What, the Instagram?

Yeah. I mean, I always assume that it's me with social media, because I'm like, this is something. Okay, well, all right, I'm gonna restart it. And then I'm like, it's still here. I don't understand.

It's related. Capitalism keeps pushing stuff on us.

Yeah, that's a toughie.

And I just, you know, I think the idea of, like, going to work all day and not opening Instagram, that's normal. But Instagram seems to think, like, if I've gone eight hours without looking at it, that this is.

Yeah. I'm gonna say I'm maybe like, once a day Instagram. And.

Yeah.

And it's. So that could be exactly. Why. Because I'm never. I mean, Yeah, I don't.

Huh.

Fuck you, Instagram. In conclusion.

In conclusion, this is the clip we should put on Instagram.

In conclusion.

We'Re gonna have to move over to truth social media.

Oh.

Our message is gonna be not welcome, not welcomed there.

I don't think we're making it past the screeder process.

No, no. Unfortunately, no. Bummer. Is there anyone on True Social besides him?

I think there's some people that follow.

Him, but I know some people who have it, like, who follow it, but I don't know.

I'm sure. I'm sure, like, like, our friend Travis, I think, goes on that. Because as part of his job, like, you know, he needs to be sort of well informed about things, and he'll be able. But he also is able to read that stuff and not lose his mind. Like, we would lose our minds if we read some of that stuff.

Our mind. Yeah, that's the problem. Well, and also, they blasted on the news enough. They're like, he posted on True Social. Like, they always read the stuff so.

Well, today we're talking about 1996.

1990. I was going to start a song and it didn't work.

Don't do that.

Sorry. Redacted.

Let's first recap what we did last time. I introduced some new words that came into the English language, including octosecond or yocto. Second. I can't remember which one it was. Talked about Fargo.

Oh, yeah.

And I talked about the craft. Aaron, you talked about how Taco Bell buys Liberty Bell. Supposedly hoax. Yeah. You introduced us to your dissertation on Don't Speak by no Doubt. Yeah.

Special place in my heart.

And then you haunted our dreams with the Bop It Toy. Heath, you gave us Twister. You gave us the Rosie o' Donnell Show. And you gave us the freakiest movie that we'd ever heard of, Mr. Wrong, starring Ellen DeGeneres, starring Alan DeGeneres and Bill Pullman, which was ostensibly a comedy, but it really was not. No, it was woman hating stuff.

It was a Hollywood being. Like, hey, gals, still don't like you. Just wanted to remind you.

We wanted you to spend your unequal pay and come to this movie.

All right, Erin, what do you got for us?

Well, you know what? I'm gonna start with a topic that seems timely.

Okay.

Given. I mean, sorry, I have a little update because I've gone on record here saying that I want this Battle Royale to happen, and I think as of this week, we are one step closer to the Elon Musk. Donald Trump.

Oh, nice.

Battle of a lifetime.

Kept thinking of you this week.

Yeah.

And I was like, yeah, are we gonna get our death match? Like, what's gonna happen?

Because he publicly criticized Trump, and then the next day, he's no longer part of Doge.

Yep.

But in 1996, believe it or not, Doge was strong, wasn't named Dosh. But they said, you know what needs to happen in the United States, we don't need a tea tester anymore. Because for 99 years, the US government employed a group of people that tasted tea.

Oh, what?

And that came to a screeching halt in 1996 when people said, that's wasteful government spending.

It took us that long.

It took us that long. It was called the Board of Tea Experts, which sounds very made up, and was created as part of the Tea importation Act of 1897. Who was drinking tea in 1996?

Like, we weren't. We're not a tea country. What is going on?

Yeah, it's a lot of good questions. I mean, I think that's why 1996, it floated to the top finally. And they were like, wait, what? No, we're getting rid of that. So the act said that it was aimed to protect consumers from imported tea judged at the Time to be littler better than hay or catnip.

Oh.

So it sounds like there was some kind of paranoia post, you know, all of the tea, Boston tea part, all the kinds of things that this. This idea just kept getting passed down. And we were afraid that some of our imported tea was not at the quality that we wanted it to. And they basically decided that we needed to have tea testers to make sure that the tea was pure. Because there was a big. In that time in history, there was a big push towards the purity of food, like making sure that it was what it says it was. So I don't know who got, you know, the wrong kind of jerky and decided we needed to be looking at all food, but somebody did. But it. It's kind of interesting because it's the beginning of the structure that would come to regulate cosmetics, food, and drugs that we know now. It was kind of start of that movement of, like, okay, what of our standards for some of these things for consumers or to be imported from other countries? Obviously, we're watching that be dismantled one structural brick at a time right now, thanks to RFK. But, you know, cool. It's been around for 100 years. Longer. Longer now. Why not take it down? It was supposed to pass quality, purity, and fitness for consumption tests. So ultimately, they couldn't figure out a way to test the fitness for consumption without trying the tea. So this is how this all came about. They were gonna point people. I could find no information about the. The requirements for being a tea tester.

Like, okay, okay.

How do you claim to be an expert in tea tasting? I don't know.

What's the interview process like?

Yeah. Here's what I didn't like when I did.

Watch me drink this tea. Tastes good.

It was good. Yeah.

Now give me a bad one.

Yeah, yeah. See if I survive.

Yeah, I. Exactly.

It's kind of like a royal food tester, like for a king or queen or something. To see if it was poisoned. Yeah.

Especially when I was looking for what information they had about what made a tea tester. And I came along this morsel, which is kind of why I think it's probably good we got rid of it, because the whole board of tea experts was a group of quote, unquote, men with finely tuned tongues.

No. Oh, God, no.

Which I hate more than claiming you're a T tester. That means you're a guy that walked in that building, said, I have a finely tuned tongue, which was just. Somebody dared you to do that out on the street, Bill, Go in there and say, you have a good tongue. And he did. And then he became a T tester.

There's a song though, like, who's down with ftt? Yeah, you know me, like, that's a song.

Yeah, we could, we could finely tune tongue. Yeah, yeah.

We can make money off.

What's your tattoo mean? Finely tuned tongue. Okay. Yeah.

Oh, dear God.

Which then took me back even a step further because I was like, okay, so now we're not even talking about testing tea. How were they testing if your tongue was finally.

Exactly. What's the certification process there?

Yeah, I don't know. So apparently tea test tea tasters working in FDA offices around the country examined every lot of imported tea using standard tees selected by the board for comparison. So they would have it like a set T and then they would compare it, which. I don't even know what you're doing there.

This sounds so made up.

Yeah. Huh. But this particular office was perceived as an example of wasteful big government. As far back as the Nixon administration. They wanted to get rid of it. They said that tea makers should self regulate.

And that's the. Been the party line ever since.

Yeah.

Self regulate.

Yeah. At the time the office was closed, it employed a head FT taster, a chemist named Robert H. Dick.

Oh, oh, Robert H. Dick, comma, ftt.

Yeah. An assistant ftt. Yeah, exactly. I'm sorry. It's okay. I'm an ftt. What? It also had an assistant tea taster, Faith Lim, both based in Brooklyn, and two further tasters at the ports in Boston and San Francisco. Its total annual cost was $253,500 or about $400,000. That's what the whole department costs.

But including their salaries.

But the big. Yeah.

Were these full time jobs?

I don't know. And I mean, I guess the government was just like, you know what, that's not gonna happen. So they ultimately came out with a statement and the committee said, we're gonna get rid of it because there's no justification for tea being held to a higher federal standard on behalf of the tea industry than any other, you know, food product. So it should just fall under the same FDA regulations, go through the same stuff. There's no reason to have a separate tea taster because why does tea get that special thing?

So we need the FDA filled with ftts. Yeah, we just need everyone.

Everybody needs to be an ftt.

I think it needs to taste everything.

It feels like you like becoming a pastor online.

Yeah.

Like you could probably just do like a fine, you know, click on these, which would taste good. And then they're like, you're an ftt.

Like, to prove you're not a robot thing. And then, yeah, you're an ftt. Okay.

You just have to select the pictures of tea.

Oh, that tongue is finally tuned which.

Of these squares and has an FTT in it.

I just liked it because it's a funny. Just a position to. Now when we're like, oh, we're gonna get rid of all this wasteful government spending. And this was a big deal in 1960.

$250,000. Like, yeah.

And they were like, we did it. And we're like, never mind.

Meanwhile, they gutted welfare this same year. So cool. Cool.

It's the exact same thing that's happening again, right? Like, here, we're going to get rid. See, we had tea tasters. That's ridiculous. And everyone's like, you're right. Way to save money. And they're like, well, I mean, it's less than. We pay our assistance on the floor. Okay.

Yeah, yeah.

But if the FDA absorbed, like, all the tea stuff came in there, and theoretically the tea. The ftts were now in the fda. So, like, if Jan from the fda, who normally tested, like, Doritos.

Yeah. Yeah.

Was off this week. Do you think an FTT had to, like, test Doritos?

I'm guessing.

Oh, I wonder how that FTT did.

Right? I was just like, I don't like Doritos. I like tea. I don't want to do this.

Or it was the other way. And they were like, why have I been tasting tea for 20 years?

Yeah.

This is a flavor explosion.

Cool Ranch Doritos. I've been missing these.

A Twinkie, you say?

Or they get those flaming hot Cheetos, and they're like, my tongue never was.

Never recovered.

Never recovered.

Heaven forbid a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Pie come across their desk, and then they got pie foot after that.

I probably have pie pits. That's exactly.

You do. This is a delayed reaction.

Oh, my God. It's coming out everywhere. It's oozing out.

Yeah. This is what's gonna. All you Ozempic girlies out there. In about 20 years, this is what's gonna happen. You're not gonna be able to taste anything, and you're gonna sweat all the time.

Yeah.

Just ooze all the time.

Teenage Mutant Turtle Pie filling.

Wow. Never knew that existed. And I don't think it should have existed.

No.

And I don't ever want to hear about a finely tuned tongue again.

Well, you Say that now.

That's true. That's true. You're right. I shouldn't say never.

You just haven't met the right man yet.

I haven't met my Mr. Wrong yet. You're right.

Yeah, yeah. Yep. And I. Gosh, I have a feeling we're gonna use that a few times in the course of this podcast.

Really think. You know, that should be a subtitle of our podcast. The Finely tuned Tongues of Memory.

Sounds like such a bad garage band.

It really does.

It doesn't understand how bad their name is, and it's trying to book gigs and people are like, what?

No.

What is this? All right, did you. We're done with.

Finally, I'm done. That's all I have on the tea tasting.

Great.

Yep.

Well, in 1996, we may know about Dolly the sheep. That happened this year. Oh, but also in 1996, it was the first three parent baby. Yep, yep, yep, yep. So we had throuples doing babies then. Which is not actually what happened, but that was my first thought, is we had throuple babies in 1996.

So progressive.

I know, but this is not progressive. So in 1996, a doctor named Jacques Cohen worked in New Jersey. Livingston, New Jersey.

I thought you were gonna say something else.

New Jersey.

Yeah.

I actually was thinking. Wait, what's NJ stand for? New Jersey. That's right. He began exploring a technique called cytoplasmic transfer.

Get it, girl?

Yeah. Oh, Heath. Basically, there's a lot of science talk. I don't get all of it. But they. They led to a solution of pulling DNA from three individuals to fertilize an embryo. And they did this to try and work around diseases that come from the mitochondria.

Okay.

So these are maternally inherited diseases. So if a woman has something like. I think it's called Lee syndrome.

Diphtheria. The vapors.

The vapors.

If the mom had the vapors, then they needed DNA from three individuals. Nuclear DNA from the biological mother and father, and then mitochondrial DNA from a female donor, and it would add up to less than 1% of the total DNA. But it's three. Three people. So they did it. They. Back in nineteen six, they. They made a baby from this process. The baby's still around. Her name is Alana Serin. Serinon. S. Yep.

Huh.

And she told the BBC in 2014, A lot of people say, I have facial features from my mom. My eyes look like my dad. I have some traits from them, and my personality is the same too, but I also have DNA from A third lady. But I wouldn't consider her a third parent. I just have some of her mitochondria.

Okay.

So it was very controversial, probably for many, many reasons. One is that, I mean, people lost.

Their fucking shit over stem cells.

Right.

Or I was thinking about the surrogate surrogacy case.

That's what I was about.

Yeah, yeah. Like, this feels like it touches on so many areas that the U.S. outlawed it in 20 in 2002.

Really?

Yes. But that didn't stop people from doing it because there's another three parent baby that was born in 2016 from US doctors working in Mexico. They did it in Mexico because it's illegal in the U.S. okay. And the first, you know, case that.

That holds true for so many things.

So many things.

Brazilian butt lifts is right where I live.

Yeah. But now they're having three parent babies in Mexico this time there, there were doctors at the New Hope Fertility center in New York, and they employed a different kind of technique to still attack this mitochondrial disease called Lee syndrome. The woman who had this implanted in her, this Lee syndrome had killed two of her kids before they reached the age of three. So this time around, she wanted to prevent this from happening, to prevent the kid from inheriting it. And she gave birth to a healthy boy carrying the blended DNA of the birth mother, her husband, and an unrelated female donor. And still banned in the US but there have been multiple babies born of three parents in the uk, Ukraine, Greece and other countries.

Wow.

And they've grown up with no side effects.

No third head or anything. Third head, second head.

They came out with two heads, but they never grew a third. So success. Yeah.

So it's.

Well, and so that's good perspective. Thank you for your positive outlook on this.

Yeah, you're welcome. Like I said, feeling great since I left corporate America. The. The work is still very controversial though, because the science says there could still be one in five babies that inherits the diseases that they're trying to avoid. Okay. And there have been some babies that have shown this, that in fact they, they didn't get the disease as quickly as they would have. But then it came on like super, super fast. So it was almost like expensive accelerated because of this process. So as of today, it's still rare, it's still highly regulated. It's only permitted for women with serious mitochondrial diseases, not for general fertility treatments. And there's tons and tons of debate about this, about the ethics, about the safety, about designer babies, you know, all of that kind of stuff. And I imagine there it's not going to be long for the world that there would be like a parental debate. Like the surrogacy thing that we talked about.

Well, that's. I. I think they made a mistake calling it a three parent baby. I mean, I. Where you right off the gate. You got a marketing problem.

Because it's a good point. And doctors didn't call it that. It was the media that called it that and the various facilities marketing teams, they kind of presented it that way. But the doctors themselves were like, this isn't a three parent baby. Yeah, but once it's out in the world, it's out in the world.

It's out in the world. Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

I feel like this would be a good premise for a sequel to the Hand that Rocks the Cradle. Ooh.

See, I went junior.

Oh, yeah. Yep, yep.

I went three men and a baby. Those three men are the dads of the baby somehow.

Yeah, yeah.

There's a lot of. If you don't want to make Mr. Wrong too Hollywood, we got lots of options for other films.

We got a situational sitcom for you that's guaranteed to make money. Wow. So, yeah, three parent babies giving hope to thruffles everywhere.

I've never heard of that.

Me neither.

Fascinating.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What about you, Heath?

The film I'd like to talk about now features what I would call a once in a generation talent.

Oh, my God.

You may know her best as Violet from Saved by the Bell or Donna Martin from 90210. Oh, my. But I'm talking about Tori spelling in the 1996 TV film Mother May I Sleep With Danger.

This is the second Tori Spelling TV movie you brought. And I love it.

I love it.

Mother May I Sleep with Danger.

Yep, I remember that.

Yeah, I do too.

I mean, that's a hard title to forget.

It really is. The marketing did well on that one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the movie, Tori Spelling plays a college student named Laurel, and she has just started dating the charming and handsome Kevin. Things are going fine for a while, but Kevin starts to get really possessive. And when Laurel notices this, she thinks his intense affection means that he must love her a lot.

Oh, but yeah.

Come on, Laurel.

Common Pitfit. Yep.

Yep. So as time passes, Kevin is a dick and he upsets Laurel and then he apologizes and then she accepts the apology. And then it all happens again and again. And you know, we all saw that coming. When Kevin meets Laurel's mother, Jessica, it somehow makes Kevin even more jealous and controlling and convinces Laurel. He convinces Laurel to cut her hair and to bleach her hair. Partly to piss off her mom and partly so she'd look more like his ex girlfriend.

Aaron says, cry Aaron.

And this all seemed fine and normal. Right? We're all right. No. No red flags here, everybody.

No. None.

No.

Proceed.

Okay. Yeah. You would think once you get to a teenage girl cutting and dyeing their hair, they might wake up, but nope. Okay. Yeah.

So Jessica, you know, mom, she suspects that something is up with Kevin, and then he's not the guy that he's claiming to be. And you know what? She's right.

Oh, my God.

No way.

Because Kevin is actually Billy. What?

His name's not even Kevin.

Right. And Billy is someone who murdered his ex girlfriend, Aaron, because she kissed Billy's friend Kevin.

Oh. Oh, so he took the dead E's name.

No, Kevin's still alive.

Oh, Kevin's still alive. He murdered the girl.

Right. He murdered the girl. When Kevin left town, Billy assumed his identity for reasons that are kind of unclear. Because, I mean, I don't assume a lot of other people's identity, but I don't just do it when they're, like, out of town for a week. Like, I go for somebody who is.

Yeah. Not gonna come back.

Right.

Yeah.

Not gonna show up and ruin the fun.

And also, I mean, I'm assuming it's implied he never got caught for that murder of Andy.

Right, Right.

And my assumption was that the police knew that someone named Billy committed the murder. And so Billy was like, if I say I'm Kevin, I'm free and clear. Yeah.

Because they can't take into consideration he might change his name.

Right.

Wow.

They'll just be like, so, what's your name? Your name's Kevin. Oh, okay. Well, it's not you. We're looking for a Billy.

Yeah. Can I see an id? No.

Nope. All right, we'll take your word for it.

Yeah. You seem like a nice guy.

Yeah.

And then when Kevin does get back to town, you know, Billy just murders him so he won't blow his cover.

Oh.

Oh, Billy. Billy's bad news, you guys.

Yeah. Who's playing Billy, by the way? Do we know him?

Oh, what was his name? Ivan. Sergei was his name. And he was on a. He was on a show on the CW in the mid-90s. Okay, I'm gonna look him up.

Continue.

So then Billy convinces Laurel to move into a cabin in the woods with him.

Oh, sure. Nothing can go wrong there.

Well, it happened with my Aunt Titus, so there we go.

She agrees, but she says she needs to get a phone line installed. Not long after that, she realizes that he's not getting the phone line installed like he said he was going to. Again. For a teenage girl, that's one step too far. Like, she's like, I need the phone.

Yeah.

So Billy decides to drug and abduct Laurel and uses her car as the getaway vehicle.

Jesus Christ.

This is like some fucked up shit for a TV movie, right?

It's a lot.

Yeah. Meanwhile, Laurel's mom, Jessica, has figured out what Billy has been up to and tells the police, who should probably be embarrassed that they were scooped by this person. And she did it before the Internet existed. I mean, she just, you know, figured it out.

She asked the right question.

Uh huh.

Yeah.

Billy's abduction plan hits a snag when Laurel's car breaks down. Luckily, she has aaa and he calls AAA for help. And that's how Jessica finds out where they are, because AAA told her that, you know, like someone called in for your. This car breakdown and this is where, you know, we sent people to help them. Yeah. When Laura wakes up, she locks herself in the cabin, but Billy uses an ax to. To break in, you know, so now we're kind of in horror movie territory.

In the Shining. Yeah.

The hell did he get an axe?

The cabin ax? The cabin came with one, I guess.

Okay, Okay.

I mean, you just carry an axe, right?

Yeah. This was a thing that we should have noticed ahead of time that he was always carrying an axe on his waist and also like on his belt. Utility belt, pager and an axe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So just as Billy is getting into the cabin, Jessica shows up and her and Laurel fight with Billy. And Laurel grabs an oar from a nearby rowboat and hits Billy in the head with it.

Okay.

He falls into the lake that was near the cabin. The women embrace and they realize that now he's disappeared. He felt. He's just felt his lake and he's gone. Right. So next scene is Billy on a date with another young woman who looks just like Laurel and Aaron. Like that's the way the movie ends. He doesn't get caught, he gets away and he's just out in the world doing this to somebody else again.

Oh, bleak.

Some bleak shit.

Yeah, it's packishly bleak. I was thinking when you were saying, like, it's a made for TV movie, so in between there you're seeing ads for like Play doh. And you know, Levi's jeans and. Yeah, like, like that's such a.

And probably beauty products to make you.

Look good for Your man Revlon dye or something? Yeah, hair dye.

Good luck.

Yeah.

Do you need to dye your hair for your boyfriend?

Yeah. Look at our new camping axe at Camping World.

Clairol can hook you up.

Yeah.

The movie aired on NBC on September 30, 1996. This part was very. The only funny thing about any of this. Tori Spelling started a campaign in 2004 to have the movie released on DVD. And it just took seven years to make that happen and it was finally released on DVD. I don't feel like in 2004, I do not recall a mass public uprising. I'm like, we need a DVD of Mother Mary sleep with danger. We need this. No, I don't recall that, but apparently Tori Spelling had her ear to the streets and I did not.

Wow.

Well, you know, of all the causes you could take on, that's a great one. Yeah.

In 2016, James Franco, of all people, executive produced a remake of the film for Lifetime Television. Foreman.

James Franco.

I don't know if he should be producing.

No, he seems like he'd be someone.

This was before we know what we know about James Franco. The updated storyline featured a young woman who falls for another young woman who is a vampire.

What? Wait a minute, wait a minute.

This is a loose setup, right?

What's the male guy quote, unquote, remake. They're like playing. They're playing fast and loose with what that means Tori Spellin and Ivan Sergey, you know, who we talked about, he played Billy in the original film. Both appeared in the remake.

Oh, no.

Because they had the time.

Yeah.

And James Franco said that he was sort of inspired to make the film after seeing, if you remember Will Ferrell's Lifetime movie, A Deadly Adoption where him and Kristen Wiig kind of lampooned Lifetime movies on Lifetime.

Yeah.

Apparently James Franco wanted to get in on that action.

I just imagine a lot of people understood that that was like a.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah. So, yeah. Mother might asleep with danger. I feel like mom's answer would be no, but I think Toris fellow did it anyway.

That feels like a Judith Krantz crancy.

It does feel like a. Yeah, like a Mary Higgins Clark title.

Right? It's a Crance sitch.

Yeah. Oh, Tori Spelling, you had our hearts in the 90s, sort of.

As a side note, did you ever watch her reality show with her husband?

When I saw bits and pieces of it and I just. It just. She's just desperate to be on camera.

I think it's rough. It was rough. It was. And speaking as reality TV connoisseurs I love it. I love a breakdown. I love you making a fool of yourself. And it was too dark. Like, it felt too sad. You're like, I don't think this is achieving what you think it is.

No. Yeah. It's not really entertaining to, like, watch her and her mom not get along.

Yeah. Kids that she can't even, like, they're like, we don't have any money.

Tori's Spelling was like that.

Oh, yeah.

They.

Her and her, like, they have so many kids. And famously, like, her mom doesn't give her any money from her dad's estate. Nothing. So, like, they don't.

Oh, my God.

Candy Spelling's keeping those purse strings tight.

Yeah.

What's next for you, Aaron?

Oh, shit, I forgot I'm next. All right, well, I'm, you know. Love a true crime. Love a true crime. And we didn't discuss in 1996 one that. You know, it's weird. I think some people really know a lot about this case, and some people have never heard of it. That's the case of Bernie TD Who.

I know nothing about this. If you.

Some people know it because Jack Black later starred in a movie called Bernie.

Oh, yes.

Okay.

Okay. And this Bernie is a former mortician that is in a Texas prison for the 1996 murder of Marjorie Nugent, who was a well to do widow who Bernie shot to death before hiding her body in a freezer for several months.

Seems like Bernie would have access to other ways to dispose of that body.

That was my very first thought.

What are we doing? Putting them in the freezer.

And I think you sort of took out any ability to say, like, it was an accident. I didn't, you know, store them.

Someone mislabeled the corpse.

Oh, Bernie, you're not smart, buddy. Okay, so.

What is the strangest part, though, is that Nugent just disappeared. Right. Because she was murdered and stored in a freezer. And literally no one in the world seemed to care. No one in this town that knew her, because everyone kind of knew her to be this grumpy curmudgeon of a lady, and they just were like, oh, well, you know what? I guess she's gone. Like, no one thought to say, I.

Suspect I know how. I'm going out.

Yeah.

Yeah. This is our future.

I'm gonna be in a freezer and no one's gonna care.

Yep.

And partially because TD was in a relationship with Nugent, who was 40 years older than him.

Oh, boy.

And apparently was so well liked in the small community that when this Crime was eventually discovered. They actively. Like, the town actively fought against his incarceration and said no. He's an incredibly kind, generous person. Like, with this isn't she probably had it coming. It basically is the rest of it, I'm guessing. I mean, that's basically what you're saying. If you don't want him prosecuted. Clearly he had the body in his freezer. I mean, this isn't like we're just speculating and he was around and they're trying to blame him. Like, he didn't get steamrolled, people. He had a body. Like, that's. That's a toughie. Yeah, that's a toughie. And they were like, listen, Bernie's a great guy. Marjorie, on the other hand, not a fan, which is a wild way to pick sides in a murder. But apparently the thing you can do. I didn't know. Yeah. A whole town got together. I mean, not only just one person, but no one in that town was like, pump the brakes.

Yeah.

Like he murdered someone. Like, isn't that also. Have you never watched any, like, crime profiling?

I was gonna say this feels like a con of some kind.

I mean, some murderers can be notoriously charming.

Yeah.

Like, that's Ted Bundy. That's how they got right where they got. So it's surprising to me that he got a whole town to just give in.

Did dateline exist in 1996?

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. So there's no excuse then. They should know.

They should know.

Yeah.

But part. Part of the theory of why the town was fine with it is because he spent a lot of Nugent 6 million dollar fortune on people in the town. He gave various gifts to people.

This is like out of the Mafioso playbook. You spend money on the community and everyone loves you. Yeah. Yes.

And he sort of confessed, and people were still like, I don't think he did it. Body in the freezer sort of confessed, spend her money. So he knew she was gone. I mean, she was gone. He spent her money. And they were like, was that real, though?

Quick question. Who do you think these people voted for in the presidential election? That's a tough one.

That's a real tough one.

I think they're still voting for Ross Perot. Still writing him in.

Yep. Yeah, that sounds right.

Or Bernie. I don't know. They might be writing him in. Yeah. So Jack Black portrayed T.D. in the 2011 movie Bernie. And although T.D. was convicted in 1999 and sentenced to life, he was released in 2014 pending a second trial. But in 2016, his original sentence of 99 years was reinstated. 99 years? Yeah. And I read that Jack Black did a lot of. Spent a lot of time with him to play him in the movie, like, talk to him a lot and stuff, and still keeps in touch with him, which I thought was kind of wild. And I don't know if that's a self preservation move, like, let me stay on your good side in case you get released again or what, But I.

Guess, is this like one of those you're not the worst thing you've ever done things?

I guess, but I don't. I mean, like, he. Bernie basically admitted that he, like, con. I mean, he wasn't in love with her. He didn't fall in love with her. He was in a relationship with her, but he knew she was wealthy, like.

Right.

So it starts to, you know. Did you just get tired of waiting for her to croak?

Yeah.

Like. Or, you know, she was just too mean.

There's Shirley MacLaine in the movie. Yes. I never saw the movie. Did you guys?

I didn't either. I kind of am interested now that I read more about the case, but just to see what. Like, what this. Where this theory holds water. Because if you just read the facts, you're like, how did anyone in this town think I think about myself? I guess I live in a somewhat smaller town, and I'm gonna have a hard time people convincing me that someone that had a body in their freezer, we should get behind and support.

That said, if one of you guys had a body in the freezer, I'm supporting you 100%.

Right. Right. But I'm doing.

Yeah.

All right.

We need to talk about something after this.

Yeah, good. I said what I said, and it's true.

Well, I would assume at that point I'm accomplice, because you can call me and I'll help you get the body in the freezer. That's not a problem. But if I don't know you and you did a sweetheart scam, I would assume you had a good reason. If there's a body in your freezer, you killed for a purpose.

Yes.

Just to get the six mil. I mean, I guess that's a good purpose, too. I'd support you.

I'm just picturing he's being like, I don't want any of this.

Yeah.

And then that's when the murder happens. And I'm. I'm in. I'm in.

And then this group of ftts shows up and says, we got this.

That's the alibi. I was promised an FTT and he did not deliver.

He did not deliver.

And this tea is bad.

Just catnip.

Said my tongue was subpar.

Yeah. So.

Okay, well, good to know where we stand. Well, kind of in the same vein of, you know, dudes that are up to no good. Although this has a slightly different focus. I'm talking about fear.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This was a movie, Mark Wahlberg's big.

Comeback from the Funky Bunch.

This is a movie that featured a young Reese Witherspoon and she plays 16 year old Nicole who lives in the suburbs of Seattle with her father and his new wife and her stepbrother. And her father is the guy from csi.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mark Harmon.

No, no. Will Peterson.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

And her stepmom is Amy Brennaman. Oh, judging Amy. So many other things. Yeah. With her glorious hair. Her hair is so glorious. Anyway, so while Nicole.

That's the best side note we've had in a while.

I don't know why. There's something about her hair.

I love it. I don't know why either.

Yeah. So Nicole is out with her best friend Margo, played by Alyssa Milano.

Oh.

Oh, good for Alyssa Milano for getting a movie role.

So while they're out at a cafe.

Alyssa Milano and Reese Witherspoon were in.

The same film playing best friends.

Wow, that's wild.

That is wild.

Yeah. The divergent career paths post this film.

And all I could think of when I saw Alyssa Milano was the Brett Kavanaugh sketch I was just thinking of in front of Alyssa Milano. Yeah.

I was just thinking when you did she contact Reese? Like, do you want to sit in on this with me?

Yeah.

And Reese is like, no again, no to everything you offered me since that movie. It's a no.

I'm good. So while they're out with their friend Gary, Nicole meets David and instantly falls for his good looks and charm. And David is Mark Wahlberg, fresh off the Funky Bunch.

Say hi to your mother for me.

That's the one. That's the one. So Nicole's dad instantly dislikes David. Something about him just doesn't sit right. And he gets angry when David willfully disregards Nicole's curfew. And ultimately it's a power struggle over who's controlling Nicole, which is a super infuriating tale. It's like that story, but it's all about the dad and the boyfriend and who can, you know, pull Nicole their way. And dad feels a real sense of ownership, which is super Gross.

Right?

But here we are. Unfortunately, dad is right. David soon becomes possessive and jealous of Nicole, and he attacks their friend Gary when he sees them hugging, beating him up, and giving Nicole a black eye. Accidentally in the process. Accidentally. As a result, she breaks up with him, but he apologizes, so they get back together.

Son of a bitch.

So David invites Nicole to a party at his friend's house. She goes and she sees her friend Margot smoking crack.

Whoa.

And apparently going off. Yeah, and apparently going off to have sex with David on the crack. Yes.

Gosh.

Except what actually happened is Margot was raped by David.

Nobody else gasped that felt left.

The next day. The next day, Nicole confronts David about his infidelity and breaks up with him for good. And she also confronts Margot, and Marco's like, no, no, no, no, no. You know, David raped me. And she's like, no, that didn't happen. David wouldn't do that.

So come on. Women support women.

Not in 1996.

Gosh.

Also, you believed that he would cheat on you, but not that he would rape.

Right?

Like, he wouldn't do that. But yep. Okay.

Yeah, we've. And we've set our friendship aside, you know, like, yeah, all those years with Margot. Doesn't matter. So then we start ramping it up significantly. After seeing Gary the friend, help Nicole into her stepmom's car, David follows Gary and kills him.

Oh, God damn, I should have saved the gasp.

Both were gasp worthy.

Okay, thank you.

Nicole goes to the mall. David corners her in the women's restroom, vowing that he will not let anyone stand in the way of him having Nicole to himself. Oh, it's hot, right? Super hot.

I mean, the bathroom part I could do without.

Yeah, yeah. Dad hears about this, and he breaks into David's house. He discovers a shrine that David has made for Nicole, so he trashes the house.

I don't feel like, is dad supposed to be the good guy in this? Because I feel like he's making some shitty decisions, too.

Neither of them are good guys.

There was another option.

There was another option. Yeah.

91 1.

Yep.

911.

But nope. Dad, he's protecting his property. So that's what's happening.

Stand your ground.

In retaliation for the vandalism, David heads to Nicole's house with his four friends, aiming to hurt the family and abduct Nicole.

So David got like. He's got a band of also misogynist people.

Yep. He's got four buddies.

A funky bunch, per se.

He does have a funky bunch.

This was not his moving on. From that.

But no goodbye Britain. No good vibrations for this funky bun.

Vibrations were decidedly bad.

So at the same time, Margot tells Nicole about Gary's death. But David and the gang, the Funky Bunch, arrive and they behead the family dog.

No. What did the dog do?

Nothing. The Funky Bunch is going bad.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Good dog.

I mean. And then they're trying to break inside. So dad and Amy Brennaman are barricading the doors, and they start attacking the guys with power tools. David takes dad hostage. One of the friends, one of the Funky Bunch tries to rape Nicole. Margot arrives and it tries to intervene, but is knocked unconscious. Shit's going down, people.

God, was Margo on crack when she showed up?

Maybe.

Okay. Also, I mean, Seattle has a police department, right?

Apparently not.

Okay.

No. Also, at this point, this house is pretty big because there's private security down the road. So Nicole is trying to signal to private security to come help them. Private security's on a break. They're not seeing this. Yeah. David shoots his friend dead for attempting to rape Nicole and then tells her that he intends to kill her father so that he can finally have her, believing that Nicole will forgive and accept him.

Oh.

David's ready to kill dad. But Nicole saves her dad by impaling David with a peace pipe.

What?

Oh.

What?

That's cultural appropriation. Also, that's not how that was intended to be used.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Explain to me what they're referring to as a peace pipe that I don't.

Have an image of. But we do know it was a gift from David. Like, David came and brought a peace pipe. I don't know, as a peace offering or something. But Nicole uses it as a weapon, so not her beloved.

Okay. Not a bong.

No, no. I'm picturing almost like a.

Why did I always think that's. What, a piece.

I mean, I think it's used the same way.

I'm picturing a long, long pipe with a little, like, thing at the end. You know, like a. Like a pipe, but just elongated.

Okay.

Right.

Yeah. Okay.

David attempts to attack Nicole after he's been fatally impaled.

Oh, God. David. Take a hint.

But dad throws him to his death through the bedroom window. And that's when the police and paramedics arrive.

Oh, my God.

So they do exist. And see.

Yeah, they just. They were on a break, too, apparently.

Yeah. When I found this fact out, it explained a lot about the movie. So producer Brian Grazer came up with the idea for the movie while on a skiing trip with his daughter.

Jesus.

Oh.

So he's thinking a possession of his daughter. And so he comes up with this movie. Leonardo DiCaprio was originally looked at for the role of David, but he didn't think he was right for the parts. So he put in a good word for Mark Wahlberg because they've just done the Basketball Diaries together.

Was it a good one?

Is that a compliment, Leo? That's what I'd be like.

He's like, I'm not gonna do it. But maybe this guy.

Yeah, he seemed like a real.

Yeah, that seems like you're purposely.

He seems like a dirt bag. If you remember this movie, chances are you remember there's a roller coaster scene where she's getting fingered by Mark Wahlberg. Yeah. Yeah. Apparently that was something that the director thought of on his own and asked her on set if she would do it. And she said no, which good for her, because she was still very young and saying no. But yeah, it was like it wasn't in the script. It was something that suddenly just came up. So she requested a stunt double for the sex scene during the sequence. So I don't know quite how that worked out because we still see her, but yeah. Anyway, so it sounds like a creepy ass set too. The film did okay. Got 20 million in the US the reviews point at what I'm talking about. So Mick of the San Francisco Chronicle, he says it contains enough truth about fathers, teenage daughters and young lust to distinguish it from most thrillers. It's a nightmare fantasy for fathers, Nick. So Mick got the message. The daughters are your property, and you can't have some guy coming and stealing your property.

Does Mick have a daughter?

Apparently Jesus Owen of Entertainment Weekly.

Oh, yeah.

Said it did a fine job evoking the sexual tensions between the father, daughter and rogue suitor.

Oh, I hate all these reviews.

Movie historian Leonard Maltin gave the picture two out of four stars, and he said that Mark Wahlberg is menacing as the love struck hood, but he could benefit from diction lessons.

It's an interesting takeaway.

I feel like that's just him bashing on his Boston.

Exactly. Like that's just his accent. So all of this aside, in 2019, it was announced they were going to do a remake with Brian Grazer again as the producer. So it's going to be great. And then in October 2022, it was reported that a television series adaptation of the films in development at Peacock.

I feel, how do you make something like that into a television series? Like, we don't need that to be drawn out over 10 episodes.

Sure don't.

I don't need it at all anyway.

Fear, starring a young Reese Witherspoon and a young Wahlberger's CEO. I couldn't think of the name. I couldn't think of the name.

That's fair. Oh, my.

Yeah.

Heath, do you have a palette cleanser, or is yours just as dark?

I don't think it's as dark.

Okay.

It's. You know the movie Striptease?

Sure do.

It's gonna seem like a nice little thump, a breath of fresh air after that. Striptease was released in June of 1996 and stars Demi Moore. And she was paid $12.5 million for the role, which at the time, which was the most a woman had ever been paid to be in a movie.

To take her clothes off.

Yep. That same year, Jim Carrey was paid $20 million to star in the Cable Guy. And it was interesting because nobody really acknowledged that pay discrepancy. Right. And also interesting is that both movies are pretty bad, and Timmy Moore and Jim Carrey's giant paychecks did not make them better.

No.

The plot of this movie is the most contrived mess I've ever seen cobbled together in. And I think I've managed to boil it down to something that we can sort of follow.

At least I'm ready.

So Demi Moore plays Erin Grant. Again, lots of errands.

Erin.

So many errands.

So many errands.

You're an inspiration. Yeah.

She's a former FBI office assistant who lost her job. Office assistant.

What?

I don't know why they couldn't have made her an agent, but she's an office assistant. She lost her job because it was discovered that her ex husband is a drug addict at a drug dealer.

Okay.

Yeah. So she loses her job because of what her ex husband is up to. Cool.

They're like, we can get another secretary. Great.

The ex husband also gets custody of their daughter. So Aaron takes a job as a dancer at the Eager Beaver.

How'd he get custody of the daughter?

I think when she lost her job, he was like, she doesn't have a job. And that's how cool.

Okay. 1996 was a great year for women. Yeah.

Killing it.

The Eager Beaver's in Miami, and she takes the job so she can earn enough money to get custody of her daughter again, which, again, I don't know that, like, that's the job to take to try to convince a judge to give you custody.

Right, right, right, right.

While working at the Strip Club. Aaron makes friends with Shad, who is played by Vin Rhames.

Oh.

He's the head of security. And she also meets David Dillbeck, who's played by Burt Reynolds.

Oh, no, I didn't know he was in this.

He's a politician, and he becomes obsessed with her.

Great.

To the surprise of really nobody. Dilbeck turns out to be a corrupt politician, and he's sort of tangentially sort of involved with a murder or two. And then Aaron gets involved in it somehow, and in the end, she exposes him and gets her daughter back. And it's never really meant to made clear why the story was that she had to become a stripper. I think it was supposed to be an empowering thing, but I also think there were lots of ways to be empowered with your top on. Sure.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's been my experience.

I don't remember the plot at all, but I remember all the marketing about, like, how amazing. And look at Demi. She learned all these moves and. Oh, my God.

Yeah. And it was based on a book that was really popular, but again, I think it was popular with probably guys for, like, you know, this lady goes and becomes a stripper because she.

That's the ultimate fantasy, right?

Yeah.

But she was still smart and could do stuff, right?

Yeah. This does feel like every dude's wet dream, this whole plot. Yeah.

The movie was marketed as a comedy because Showgirls, which was released the previous year, was not well received, and they wanted to kind of differentiate it from Showgirls, which, again, it was like, if you're worried that your movie is looking too much like Showgirls, maybe. Maybe make some changes to the story.

Like, marketing as a comedy is a tough battle.

Huh. Okay.

Interestingly enough, though, the movies. Both movies shared a choreographer, and her name was Marguerite Derricks. So I don't know if that lady.

Is good on you.

That's like, good. Like small talk at a cocktail party. Like, listen, I helped with Showgirls and Striptease.

Someday it'll be your granddaughter. You know what my grandma did?

Yeah.

Striptease was in theaters at the same time as Disney's the Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Oh.

Which featured Demi Moore in the role of Esmeralda. She was. And I feel like the people at Disney were not super thrilled with how this timing all worked out.

Probably no.

1. A year after it was released, Striptease was in the news again because it was shown in a fourth grade class in Chicago.

What? How the hell did that happen?

The teacher apparently let Students vote on which movie they wanted to watch in class, and this is the movie that won. And I guess that teacher just believes in democracy. Democracy so much that they had no choice but to show the movie.

How was that of the voting options?

How was that on the.

For also what it's worth, Scream, which came out in 1996 too, was also shown at the same school on the same day in a different class.

Cool. This is a great school.

And I feel like it must have been, like, the last day of school or something. And those teachers were just like, sorry, I'm. I'm fresh out of fucks. Like, I don't care. Just hit play, be quiet, leave me alone.

And also maybe a little punishment for, like, you know. Oh, yeah, Fuck you, kids.

You're not going to fall.

Yeah.

So at the premiere of Striptease, Demi Moore debuted her newly shaved head. She had buzzed her hair for her role in GI Jane, another bad movie that maybe we'll talk about at another point. Striptease. You might be surprised, but Striptease did not win any Academy Awards.

Damn it.

But it did win six razzies, including worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Actress, Worst Screenplay, Worst screen Couple, and worst Original Song for a ditty named and this is a quote, pussy, pussy, whose kitty cat are you with? Music and lyrics by Marvin Smokey Montgomery.

What in the actual. We're gonna need to listen to that.

I like it.

And that is Striptease.

That should probably be our outro this week. It's just that. So.

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I was gonna say we can have a bag sale to cover the licensing.

It's not on Spotify. Wait, let me go to Striptease and see.

You're gonna get. You're gonna get so many weird ads now.

So many weird ads. Who's. I'm gonna turn this down. Don't worry. But we need this on here.

I'm trying, too, and I'm getting nothing.

Yeah, I'm getting a song by the Light Crust Doughboys.

I got that too.

And I was like, oh, my God. The first recording and first release by Light crust doughboys in 1938. What?

He won a razzie for first worst original song for that.

Hey, Miller, I lost my little P. Will you help me find it? This is the original. Of course. Of course.

Of course.

Come on, gang.

Let's call it.

Where can you be?

Seems happy.

Wow. Well, if that was the song, good for them. Yeah.

Killed it.

Okay, well, I'm sure that was worth it. The last, you know, two minutes of just silence and searching. But, hey, had to do it.

Had to do it.

Yeah.

Needed to be done.

All right, good job, everybody.