Welcome to Where Parents Talk.

My name is Leanne Castellino.

Our guest today is a family nurse practitioner and clinical nurse specialist.

Alice Benjamin specializes in cardiovascular health, critical care, and emergency medicine.

She is chief nursing officer consultant@nurse.com, a podcast host, and a media contributor.

She's also a mother of four.

Alice joins us today from from Atlanta, Georgia.

Thank you so much for making the time.

Thank you so much for having me.

I'm excited to be here and lots.

To talk about, especially at this time of year when we're talking about back to school.

Before we get into that, though, the correlation and connection between mind and gut health has never been stronger.

There's so much science coming out about it each and every day.

Is it ever too early to talk to your children and nurture in them healthy eating habits?

Absolutely not.

I think we don't talk to our children early enough.

And I think it's because we as parents and aunts and other family members feel like, oh, they won't understand.

Because truth of the matter is sometimes we as adults, we don't truly understand all of the important information about food, the dynamics, how we are, what we eat, how it influences our body and know, even reading nutrition labels.

So I think we, when, when we as adults struggle with nutritional information, it's very hard for us to believe that our children, who literally, for the most part put anything and everything in their mouth, will understand.

But I beg to differ because these kids are really smart.

They pick up on things.

They, they watch what we do, hear what we say, and they mimic us.

So know modeling healthy eating as well as talking to our children is one of the best things that we could do early on because that will plant the seed for their lifestyles that they'll adopt as adults.

When we talk about meals and certainly talking about lunches and school lunches, that is a huge pain point in many families and for many parents.

What are some of the most common challenges that parents encounter when it comes to preparing lunches for their kids?

Well, I, if most parents like myself are having to work to pay the bills, I mean, we struggle with balancing work, family life, and, you know, really focusing and taking care of our children.

And so when it's, especially when it's time to go back to school, we're struggling for time.

We need something quick, fast, convenient.

And so we struggle with preparing healthy lunches for our kids because it's very hectic.

And according to a Crispy Green survey, 33% of parents find packing their lunches and home meals one of the Most stressful tasks.

And it shouldn't be stressful when we're eating.

I mean, eating is a part of life.

We nourish our body.

We should be fun when we're cooking and eating.

But it becomes turns out to be a very stressful task for parents.

And so I think what parents would benefit from are having, you know, lunch, schedule guides, you know, tools and tricks and hacks, because we don't have to.

We're not in this alone.

I should say this as a parent.

I know I've struggled.

I know other parents that struggled.

And so I think collectively, when we have tools and guides and information to help us juggle and balance work, family, school, that will actually enjoy the process more.

And, you know, when we're stressed and feeling anxious and, you know, moving from one place to another, sometimes we can eat mindlessly.

We just grab something quick, fast.

Maybe it's, you know, highly processed, salty, sugary, but it's quick and convenient.

And really we need to step back because that's actually harmful for us in the long run.

Let's talk about the survey that you alluded to by Krispy Greens.

Was there anything in there that really caught your eye and struck you?

Oh, yes.

In particular, 79% of parents felt like their kids eat enough healthy snack options between meals.

So, you know, that sounds good.

You know, oh, wow.

Nearly 80% of parents thought their kids ate healthy snacks.

But on the flip side of that, we do know that the parents, when also in the survey, reported that their kids do also will snack, will snack on salty snacks, sweet treats.

And those aren't always the healthiest choice.

So there's actually a disconnect there.

And so while we believe our children might be eating healthy, sometimes in those quick, fast moments, they're grabbing salty snacks, sweet snacks.

And additionally, 41% of those lunches that are the parents would pack for their kids or that they thought their kids were eating, 41% of that came back uneaten or was just thrown away.

And so even if you pack a healthy lunch, if 41% of that is being thrown away, what of that healthy lunch is actually being consumed?

So I, you know, and there were some other elements in the study that were, as a, as a parent and a nurse practitioner, I have to say that because I feel like I wear this double hat here as a family nurse practitioner, I, I help take care of people that come see me for their screenings and when they're ill, but then also as a mother, so I understand the pain points.

Also in that study, there were 29% of parents who felt that their children don't eat enough fresh fruit.

And so a lot of, a lot of things there.

I encourage people to go and read the study, but I would say as a provider and a mom, those were some of the things that stood out the most to.

So when you talk about salty or sugary snacks, many parents may say, you know what, during the school day, I just want to make sure my kids eating anything.

As long as they're eating something, I'm happy.

So I'm willing to make that trade off.

What do you say to a parent who maybe presents that argument right?

Well, I've been there and done that, so I completely understand what it's like.

I've just gotten off of work, I've picked up my son from school and then we're on the way home, it's already late, there's lots of traffic, traffic.

I don't feel like I have enough time to cook and then help them with their homework and then, golly, I'm just exhausted.

So I completely understand.

But I want to encourage parents that, you know, with a little creativity, with a little patience, you can actually find healthier alternatives which your kids will enjoy.

And, but sometimes if we're not looking for it, we don't see it right.

Out of sight, out of mind.

So for example, if your kid is, or your tween is someone who loves eating chips, right, they like that crunchy, that crunchy taste.

Maybe you introduce, reduce them to like crunchy veggie chips or maybe freeze dried fruit which also has crunch to it.

So and there are also other things that we can do along the way to make gradual changes like swapping out one unhealthy item, an unhealthy item for something healthier.

So I know I've done it.

I'm, I'm guilty as charged.

But when you know better, you do better.

When you know what the options are, then you can make the choice to make a healthier choice for your child.

And we as parents want nothing but the best for our children.

As a provider, I want nothing but the best for our children.

So those small, what we, what might seem like a small incremental change actually makes a big difference.

And it can be, you know, we making a healthier choice for your child now, even, even though you might think, oh, it's just one meal, it's just one snack, they may adopt that for a lifetime.

When we talk about the long term effects and the lifetime of an individual and the potential health impacts of not Eating health or having those salty or sugary snacks from a young age, what does that look like as you put on your, you know, your nurse hat and seeing down the line as you do with your patients, what that looks like?

You know, unfortunately, we are starting to see a rise in the number of children who are overweight and obese, with diabetes and with hypertension.

And how does that happen to a child?

You know, as an adult, we've had several years to make bad choices, but when we're seeing that in younger and younger kids, letting us know that very early on our kids are being introduced to unhealthy lifestyles, more sedentary, not making health, healthier food choices.

So unhealthy eating, which I'll tease out here, really, that can establish during childhood and lead to a lifelong, lifelong term, health conditions.

And so it's really important that, and I can't emphasize this enough that we introduce healthier food options to our children, we talk to them about why one choice is healthier than another.

So like for example, if I, if I take the spectrum of, and this is more around sugars, but there's apple juice, there's actually an apple and there, there might be some apple type snacks.

Right now you can find healthy freeze dried snacks, right?

But then there are some that are very sugary.

So you got to read the labels, right?

You got to read the labels.

And then they love this apple juice, right?

But that's a quick dump of sugar.

And drinking that throughout the day while they're trying to stay hydrated really packs on calories, sugar and other preservatives.

Where eating that apple, fresh fruit, it has, it does have sugars, but has natural sugars, it has fibers in it, it has other vitamins and minerals.

So that is what's really important.

So I think when we lay that out on the table and we can also even gamify this for our children, so it's fun to learn, we can make a game of it in a sense, you know, cooking with our children, these type of things will help educate and model for our kids what healthier choices are.

So when they find themselves in situations like, well, I'm here, but maybe it's not the healthiest place to eat.

But what are my options?

What's a healthier choice?

We can equip them with the knowledge they need to make healthier choices down the line, but it really sets them up for success and which is important because as kids we know that what they eat is very important because we know if a child doesn't eat right, they're not going to be able to focus.

Low blood sugar, it's going to influence their learning.

But also just as much as if they do eat fatty foods, sugary foods, foods high in calories are preserved, as those things can affect their cognitive development, it can lead to attention issues, memory, learning, they can pack on some weight.

So those are the things we want to prevent.

So it's important to talk to our kids about that.

You talk about the example with the apple.

I wonder if you have other examples.

Looking at what you typically find in a lunchbox of a student and what could be some healthy alternatives to maybe some of those typical items that you'd find.

So what's in a kid's school lunch?

Right?

What are some of the most common foods that we're finding?

Well, typically you'll find chicken nuggets, sandwiches with processed meats.

You'll find pizzas, chips, cookies, you know, foods that are really high in fat, high in calorie.

And while I've eaten those two.

So I also.

Let me preface this, this is not to wag my finger at anyone because we've all indulged in these foods, right?

Everything in moderation.

But I think when it comes to our children and what we're putting in their lunches, it's very important to understand what's in our kids lunch boxes.

Because when we know what's in there, we can assess, you know, the nutritional value, the caloric value.

Is this going to be a good energy source that's going to feed their body in mind to be productive and growing children?

So when that's not in there, or excuse me, so when those type of foods are in there, that gives us an opportunity, we can identify that, that gives us an opportunity to look for an alternative.

So I'll take for example, sandwiches.

What kid doesn't love sandwiches?

Right?

We all love sandwiches.

But I think when we, when we look at preparing a sandwich, picking whole grain, wheat or fortified bread instead of processed meats, using grilled chicken or you know, other types of meat that are fresh that you, maybe you've cooked.

So you know what's in there, Lettuce, tomatoes, low skim cheese, um, excuse me, lowfat cheese, if you will.

But when we can identify what's in there and then just make a, a small alternative, a small change in there, we can make for that lunch to be a lot healthier for our children.

They'll get better nutritional value, it'll energize them for their growing minds and growing bodies and hopefully our kids then will learn to adopt that.

And then, so when they are presented with those lunch swaps, as every kid does, like, oh, I have fruit snacks.

I have this, that, you know, they'll say, oh, you know what?

No, that's, I'm fine.

I have, you know, I have these celery sticks with, with almond butter.

So, you know, and, or those type of things.

We want to pack our, our kids lunch with more healthier options even.

And I think I've already said freeze dried fruits, but there are other low calorie snacks.

I mean, you can, and you can find unsalted, unsalted pretzel, wheat pretzels.

There are so many other options out there.

And I think when parents are looking.

So you, you go shopping and you're looking at that wall and you're just like, I just need something that my kids will eat.

They're afraid that if they buy foods like, oh, this is too healthy, their kids won't eat it.

But I can promise you, you, you know, we're.

When we're born, our taste buds aren't specific for any type of sweet or salty type of foods.

We actually acquire that.

So just as much as we teach our kids math and science, we can teach them what healthy foods are and teach their bodies and their tongue in their palates to enjoy those.

When you talk about going grocery shopping, certainly the advertising and the marketing around some of these sugary, salty snacks that we're talking about is pretty aggressive.

Then you've got many families, you know, kids who are under pressure by their classmates for what their classmates are bringing and, you know, comparisons and that kind of thing.

What would you suggest a parent could do to combat or overcome this kind of peer pressure?

Let's call it right.

Advertising is very strategic.

They make things colorful, they look playful so that children and tweens will want those things.

And yes, there's a lot of prayer pressure as well.

As parents, one of the ways that we can combat that is by having a little fun with the food.

So, for example, I talked about the sandwich earlier.

Maybe we take that sandwich and we cut into a star shape, right?

Maybe.

And you can have, there are these, you know, you can find anything on Amazon, but kind of those toaster imprints.

You can put a smiley face on, on your, on the sandwich.

You can find, you know, colorful lunch boxes and Tupperwares for the kids to use, you know, decorating.

Let's say they have a bottled water and their friend has some type of juice.

Well, you could take that water and you could put, freeze grapes overnight and put grapes in the water so it serves as ice.

And then something was sweet that they can, you know, chew on once they finish their water.

So there are lots of colorful, playful ways that we can add to our kids food.

And you know, again, kids are going to want, they're going to want that to something a little bit sweet, something a little crunchy.

So, you know, veggie chips, freeze dried fruits.

Those are the ways you can combat the desire for maybe those crackers or cookies or potato chips.

So lots of creative ways out there.

I know that going to the grocery store can sometimes feel like a task.

It's not like, oh my gosh, we're going to Disneyland.

No, we're going to the grocery store.

But I encourage parents and my kids, they, they didn't all I have boys and, and they didn't always like going to the grocery store with me, but I would take them to the grocery store and try to make a field day of it, make it fun, educational, and then always ask them, so, what do you want to eat?

What are you gonna, you know, come?

I'm gonna, Mommy's gonna buy you stuff.

But I want it to be healthy and I wanted something that you're gonna eat.

So including our children in the food and also making it will also increase the likelihood that they're actually going to eat it?

Absolutely.

Now, as kids get older, tween teens, adolescents, we have less control of many things that they do, certainly.

And their food intake would probably be on the top three of that list.

Any thoughts, tips, tricks, strategies, approaches that you could share with parents about food, healthy food choices for those age groups?

I, well, let me, let me tap on the tweens because those are the ones who they, they're a little bit older, they've identified their friends.

These are the times where we're starting to see their pat.

Personality come out.

And actually, you know, you typically by the age of, of 16, we've, we've.

So children have developed in a way where they've kind of, they've developed that personality, the things that they like and they don't like.

And so they can have very strong personalities, if I could say that, in the most nicest way.

And sometimes they don't want to listen to their parents.

Right?

They have their friends, they know everything.

And so sometimes it's really hard to, it's hard to get children of that age to want to listen more about what, what they're eating.

You know, for the younger ones, they're a Little more playful.

They're still grabbing and hugging us when we come to the door.

Your 16 year old, maybe not, right?

They're in their room, they got their iPad, they're playing their video games.

But I would say this still, still encourage them and include them in part of the grocery shopping.

Even when you think your kids aren't listening, they are listening.

And I would say this, take them.

And it's also kind of a life lesson.

If you have a tween, take them grocery shopping with you even though they may not want to, because it also prepares them for being adults.

Because you could on that trip, obviously when you're there in the grocery store, you could talk about healthy food choices.

Why this, why not that?

You can talk to them about reading food labels and do it in a way, a subtle way, just like, oh, you know what?

Oh, grab those two types of, I don't know, I'm trying to grab those two cans of vegetables on, on the shelf there.

Okay, let's, let's take a look at this.

Which one is actually healthier?

And then I don't know.

Well, okay, well, let's look at the label.

What does this say?

And you know, you can do it that way.

And then after a while, you know, they get a little curious, they get challenged a little bit and they want to learn more.

And so involve your kids in the grocery shopping.

And then when you get home, although they might feel like putting the groceries away is a little bit of a chore, but talk to them about, you know, preserving food, why can some food stay on the counters for a long time and why are some perishable and what does that mean for our health?

But when you include your children in the, in the conversations, one, it helps promote family quality time in these formative years.

If you don't do that, kids will grow further and further away.

They get distant.

And so this is a way to maintain a good relationship with your children.

Educate them, show them that you care, teach them life lessons that they'll carry on into, into life with them.

And so I think that if anything, and I, maybe that's a lesson I wanted to share because that's what I've recently gone through with my, my son who's.

But I would say that is probably one of the tips that I would share for tweens and for the younger ones just involved.

They, they love their mom and dad.

They want to be a part of the process.

Sometimes they want to get in the kitchen and we're telling them, move, get out of my Kitchen.

I, we've done that.

So include them, include them in the process, even if it slows you down a little bit.

It's like when they learn to walk, right?

They're walking, but they're walking.

They're walking, but they're a little too slow.

So you pick them up and try to go help allow them to, allow them the time, have the patience to teach them.

Because again, just when you think, even if you think your kids don't understand or you think they're not listening, they actually are.

Now, in many families, the school day quickly transitions into after school activities.

In some cases, people aren't getting home while they go into a whole set of evening extracurriculars that their kids may be involved in.

What would you say to that parent in terms of how to keep their child energized, happy and well, nourished in that circumstance?

Well, to keep your kids nourished and energized throughout those busy days, which then get longer and longer because now they have gymnastics, now they have football, or now we're going to karate, those type of things.

It's important for parents to prepare portable snacks that are nutrient dense so they can eat them on the go.

Snacks like fresh fruit, yogurt, nuts, whole grain crackers, all of those can provide sustainable energy without sugar crashes that come from those process snack.

So planning ahead and packing these snacks in advance can really ensure that your children will have healthy options available and, and at some of the busiest times of the day.

So, and I'll just say this, when all possible, I actually keep water and whole grain crackers in my car.

I kept it throughout the, the, you know, throughout school because it never failed.

Even though we were thinking, okay, pick him up from school, go straight home.

It would always be like, oh, we got to go here, we got to go there.

Then there's traffic.

And so rather than, because then the kids are going to get hungry, they're going to say, oh, mom, can we go to McDonald's?

Or can mom, can we have this?

Something that is probably not on the healthy list of things to eat.

So I'll say, oh, well, here, have, you know, have this whole grain bar until we get to the house.

This should hold you over that and some water.

And that usually does the trick.

Well, and what's interesting about that is that they'll eat anything when they're hungry, right?

Oh, yeah, they will.

So there's a benefit in that for sure.

Now you talk about your family.

You're a mother of four boys, you know, you've talked about that.

You've been there, you've done that.

We all have.

Certainly in terms of some of the things we've talked about as it relates to food.

What did lunch prep look like in Nurse Alice's home?

Oh, so it was a mess.

But you know what?

I'll take the message.

See, when they get older, then you realize, like, oh, I appreciate the mess, right?

But when they're younger, you know, they pull that chair up to the countertop, they're standing over the counter trying to help.

You got to remind them to wash their hands while they're on the low key picking their nose.

It's like, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, what's happening?

But you try to maintain order, right?

A little booger is not going to hurt a mom.

Mom and dad.

I'm just going to say, as a nurse practitioner, I'm telling you, there are a lot of other things you need to be more worried about than, you know, them picking their nose while they're prepping their sandwich, but including them in the process, you know, having them.

I would have.

Have my.

And I would do this strategically in the refrigerator.

I would strategically position those healthy snacks that the things I wanted them to eat that they could grab themselves lower in the refrigerator so it was easily accessible.

If you place the higher.

The.

The things you really want them to eat too high in the.

In the refrigerator, they can't reach them.

So.

But I would, I would say, you know, ask them, can you grab the lettuce?

Can you grab the tomatoes?

This and that.

I'd have them at the sink washing things, getting the ve veggies together.

Now cutting was a little bit diff.

Challenging, but, you know, kids, they like to live on the wild side, you know, also teaching them kitchen safety as well.

But, you know, and it was a mess.

It was always a mess.

And.

And the finished product didn't always look as pretty as mom just did it herself.

But I would say at the end of the day, the quality time that I was able to have with my children, the lessons I wasn't able to steal in them, the love that they felt from, you know, being told, maybe you can't eat this, but you can eat this because it's healthier.

You know, no one wants to tell their kids no.

And sometimes he's like, my mom won't let me eat this.

My dad will.

You know, at the end of the day, the, you know, and maybe when they're a little older, they'll appreciate like, wow, yeah, mom didn't want me.

Mommy did love me.

She didn't want me to eat all this stuff and get diabetes and hypertension and all these other prevent little things.

But it was lots of fun, it was a lot of mess.

But I think that's a very small price to pay with the family time and the healthy eating that was, would be a result of it.

And then once a hundred kids get older, you can't get that time back.

So it's always a good laugh to talk about who spilled the juice on the countertop and things like that.

It's always interesting talking to a professional who's also a parent because in your case you have so much knowledge about the subject matter and you're also mom.

So how do you convey that message without being too heavy handed, wearing those hats and still getting the message through?

What were some of the challenges that you overcame with your own kids with respect to healthy snacks and how did you overcome them?

Well, as a, as a nurse practitioner, I have a mantra.

I like to talk to people before they become my patients.

So talking to someone as a, as a patient, the insult, the injury, the traumas already happened.

Talking to people allows me to be more conversational, talk to them, be, you know, to just offer tips and tools and things like that and not be overbearing in that sense.

So with my kids, obviously they did hear some, some medical talk in there every once in a while.

But I had to realize that sometimes as healthcare professionals we have to be very careful and use health literacy and be very compassionate when we talk because if we don't, we can turn someone off to wanting to be a receiver of that information.

And that's the last thing that I want.

I would rather be your, your, your, your friend, your cool auntie, you know, and deliver information in a way that is relatable and understandable to you so you can apply it.

So I had to apply those things with, with my kids.

Although I'd say we'll say they've heard me in conversation.

So sometimes they actually that's why I say kids really listen to you.

They, there are things that I've talked about with nutrition, with medical conditions and with diabetes and hypertension that I would have never thought that a 10 year old would know.

And, but he listens.

So you know, when it comes and maybe I got so involved in my story I almost forgot the question there.

But it's, you know, I do it very gently and I think one of the most important things is that again, spending that time with my children and being able to talk to them.

I'm a nurse practitioner, but I'm still your mom.

Let me lean on the side of mom because I'm going to forever be in that role.

And that's my, actually that's my number one job.

And so to deliver that information in a nurturing way is really what I strived to do.

Any final thoughts on tips and strategies, advice for parents around the whole piece?

With respect to school lunches, I'm gonna.

Say stick to it.

Sometimes it can be very frustrating as parents when we send our kids, you know, we spend our good hard earned money on foods and they go out to the school and then maybe they come back in the lunch pail or you learn that maybe they were thrown away or some, you know, in that case, don't, don't get frustrated, but maybe talk to your child more about what it is that they want to eat and don't want to eat.

It might be something as, as, as very subtle as, you know, well, I don't really like bananas, but I do like strawberries.

So maybe you just alter the fruit.

And sometimes they, you know, there, there's a lot of peer pressure out there as well.

Not even just with foods, but with other things.

We know our kids are facing a lot now, you know, having a dialogue with our children about what are they talking about?

What are your friends talking about?

What do you guys talk about at lunchtime?

What are your friends eating?

You have to inquire and explore because if you can better understand the environment that your kids are in, you can better understand what they're faced.

Equip them with the, the information or a response to something as to, you know, why they shouldn't just be eating hot Cheetos all day.

Maybe their friend, my friends all have hot Cheetos.

Mom, this.

Well, you know, I know hot Cheetos can be, can, can taste yummy, but you know, let's read the label of a hot Cheeto.

So maybe you can have a couple hot Cheetos, but let's not eat a whole bunch of them.

And you should tell your friends if those are really your friends, you want them to be healthy, right?

Well, tell your friends.

So I think that's how you have to kind of gauge the conversation.

And that's, that's a conversation for even kindergartners all the way to high schoolers.

Absolutely.

Lots of food for thought.

Nurse Alice Benjamin, nurse family nurse practitioner and clinical nurse specialist.

We thank you so much for your time and your perspective today.

Thank you for having me.