Welcome to All Things Health and Abundance podcast. This is a podcast where we discuss different health related issues and come with real tips and advice. Today, we're going to talk about tantra and tantric massage.

What is tantra and what is tantric massage? Why is tantra misunderstood? What are the therapeutic benefits of a tantric massage? Why do people enjoy it and how is it different from erotic massage? These and much more is what will be discussed today and today with me is Daniela Thorp. Daniela is a certified sexological bodyworker and works both with individuals and with couples. She is also certified in pregnancy guidance and has worked closely with expectant parents in the coaching classes. She facilitates the development of the individual's possibility for intimacy. Together with the client, she is focused largely on handling various traumas related to physical experiences as well as sexuality. And she owns the Academy of Sexuality and Intimacy in Oslo. Welcome, Daniela. I'm really happy to have you here with us today. Also, because I, like many others, I'm really curious about Tantra. I've taken one tantra massage course, but otherwise I haven't really been exploring it so much. So it's really nice to have you here.

Thank you for the invitation. Thank you. It's nice to be here.

Nice to hear that. Can you start by explaining in simple terms what tantra is and what a tantra massage is and how it is different from other types of massages, like, for example, Thai massage or other types?

Hmm. Okay, So now, already with this question, we will be here maybe one hr. I will talk to people they don't know anything about. This is, I think, the best because it's very important. When people start to think about tantra massage or tantra, which kind of experience they will have first, we can say that in the professional world there are three groups of tantra. Some people call it white, red and black. My experience is that it's based on culture and different kinds of countries. Because I traveled a lot and tried many different kinds of styles and Christian countries and no Christian countries and everything, what is possible. And of course everything is about the people who teach it. What is their experience, why they decided to go on the path with tantra. For some people and for some kind of teaching, we can call it the white group of Tantra. It's mainly about spirituality. That is the main focus of really breathing techniques. Breathwork You talk and learn all about the energies and chakras and all this vibration you can feel in the body with a very, very sensitive touch, very sensitive techniques, I will say. And most of the time you are trained to create the feelings based on the breath in your body by yourself. Wow. Yeah. That it's not so much connected to the touch then. Something like a red tantra. And here this is the most provocative, I will say, for people they don't know anything about. It's always included touch. It's always not always, but it's possible to include touch. Also in intimate parts, we call it tantra lingam massage and yoni massage, which means vulva, massage or penis massage included in the body. And it's something like in the white tantra, you are 100 responsible for what you will create in your body. In the red tantra, it's 50 to 50 that you are 50% responsible by your breathwork movement and sounds that you are communicating your boundaries and you know what you want or you are just trying. But it's very important that all this type of tantra, especially the red one you experience like a new person in a really safe space. Because when you are coming like a new and you never experience this kind of touch also on intimate parts, it can be very confusing for our brain because our culture and our body, it's learned that if we touch on the genitals, it must be sexual, right? It's usually something what is not right to do between men and women if they are not coupled or they don't want to be sexual? Yeah. And this is what people need to learn. First of all, it's about that. Yes, you can be touched and you can make space. If you allow yourself to accept yourself fully like that, you can be touched on the intimate part, but it's not anything, anything that you can imagine in your head. Like masturbation. No, it's totally the same gentle touch. You know, for us it's like when we are giving a tantra massage, especially to new people, it's very important that they understand that. For me, it's a ritual to invite you to enjoy, accept and love all your body. And for me, it's not important if I am touching the penis or your heart. For me it has the same value, the same importance, because everything in the body is connected. Here is the biggest trap of tantra these days and in our cultures, because many people use this kind of tantra to promote erotic messages. Promoting, you know, like people who go for one week or two weeks, tantra course, they learn about tantra massage and they are going to do tantra massages. They can’t do tantra massage. You need to have so much work with yourself, of course, that you learn how to work with the people, the clients when they are coming. But first of all, your part, if you want to do tantra massages, is to cultivate and create and understand fully of your body and your sexual energy, what is possible, where it can take you, you know, try all the kinds of shades of it. It's not possible. A good Tantra massage After two weeks of training, it's not okay. It's a part which I started when I was 21 with my first workshop, and I started to give people massages two years after. When I start to understand all my traumas connect to sexuality. Wow. So I started just with friends to share my knowledge. How it works, how it helps what I learned, you know And they started to share home and they were coming back and wow you know it's working. Can I try the massage? And I made many mistakes. Many mistakes when I started with tantra massages. It's not matter how much information I have because it's about action and reaction and you must be trained really, really well to feel and understand what is yours and what is bringing a second person or the couple who is coming to experience you. Something so intimate. And I am not talking about intimacy that we will have together 5 or 10 orgasms. I am talking about intimacy where we are meeting like people where yes, sexuality. It's one of the things that we will experience. But to experience the intimacy and the real gift of the tantra is not about sexuality. It's about vulnerability, about trust, about that you can meet with another person and you can be totally naked in your emotions, in who you are, in your body. You can be who you are and you will not be charged. Yeah. And you will just learn about yourself. That nothing is not a negative or positive about what you are going through in life, but everything is a gift. If you know about how it works with you, how you react to it, how you develop this kind of program and this kind of you. So for me, tantra massage and tantra work, it's not about anything else than just pure love and a totally present moment when you can really relate. The only person you can connect, it's the person in front of you and you can be there for them for 100% that you hear each word, you hear each breath. You can feel everything. What is going on in the body? If the hair, you know, wakes up, if they are cold, if they are, it's like total care. Wow. About the person And he can then be in the safe space like in the ritual of tantra example which we do in the beginning, especially with new people. It's very important. It's really the main message, like for example, I am your mother, I'm taking care of you. Wow. You can be who you are. You know I can manage, I can hold, I can fully act up. And this is the healing of the tantra because we are very, very traumatized also in sexuality. The men are nervous if they will have enough erection, if they will satisfy the woman, if she will have an orgasm with them and a woman the same as I will be nice enough. Can I make him ejaculate the right way and all this kind of pressure it's taken away in this kind of treatment. So it's not sexual. Even if you touch and massage the penis and the vulva because it's not about interaction between us. Like with your partners, it's about 100% support in your process of connecting with your body, all body and figure out and find out what is there and sexuality if it's 50% of our lifeforce energy. So of course, sexuality it's there also, but it's not anything like that. We try to articulate or have orgasm or try to experience something. The biggest difference between erotic massage and real tantra is that in erotic massage you have a goal. People are coming to me, to the studio and they say, Hey, I would like to example this kind of type of tantric technique, or I would like to experience this tantric full body orgasm. I'm like, okay, yeah, we will see what we can do because you never know. You can start to teach them the technique, but you never know what the body brings up during the course. Because you don't you don't know. And you are making space for it because this is the main problem in our society that there is no space to really be who I am. Yeah, it's so many moments where we can meet ourselves like that, especially with other people. It's very important. When people go for a tantra massage, they understand that. They understand that it's about the present moment. And yes, we can promise them that we will help them together, that they have wonderful orgasms, but we can tell them that it will be on this kind of massage because maybe they will come tired. Maybe they had some really bad day on conflict morning with their mum or partner or something. And when you connect them with this kind of emotion, it will pop up like a first. I have clients, they are coming every three weeks, once in the month and each of the sessions is totally different. Yeah. Because once they are sad, they cry. Once they are happy or they connect with something nice and they are happy, you know, and sometimes they just need to relax. You know, sometimes we have to really talk about some topics or some trauma comes up and this is but this is the healing that you can see it, you can name it, you can express it in safe space, and then you can take the paper and throw it away because it's clean. Or you can write on again, the new experience with you that your body remembers. But of course if people use it like erotic massage, which is much easier and you make much more money on it because you can make massage. Yeah, this massage is in the day because people are coming for two hours, 90 minutes. So there is usually some young woman or beautiful woman in the pictures. Usually the pictures are in underwear or something like that. They call it tantra.

Is that black tantra?

You know, this is not for me, even this is for me really like erotic massage, because the main difference between erotic massages and tantra massages is that in tantra you search for all the impacts and everything in yourself inside. So you usually have to close your eyes. I have closed my eyes during all the sessions. Most of the people don't see naked. This is the most funny thing about it. Yeah, you really just feel and create things which are in the body. So it's not matter if the therapist is beautiful or young, if she has red hair or blonde or blue underwear or if it does not matter because you don't see it because you are connecting just based on the energy and on the feelings. And this is also why the tantra can be different every time. But in erotic massage you are coming for something in your head. What do you want the people to feel like to ejaculate ?

Yes. With expectations of final results.

Yeah, but then you don't make a space in your body to feel what is there, but you are creating a mechanical program to get to your body somewhere where you want the body to be. But it doesn't work long term. Then you need new stimulation for it, you know, because it's coming from outside. So you have to watch one on blonde girl or blonde guy or next time you want, I don't know, dark hair or a bigger breast or a bigger ass or I don't know, whatever. Yeah, but sooner or later the experience becomes flat. Doesn't have any development. It doesn't give you anything. Yeah. Maybe it gives you something. Of course it's fun at the moment. You know, like you are open in your sexuality. U2

It doesn't go into the healing part.

No, no. You can just have fun. U2

Yeah. So, yes, actually, the healing happens on both sexual, emotional level, physical level traumas. So such a broad spectrum of healing, right?

Yes. When I say it again very easily, we have three brains. One is the logic, one is the emotional one and one is the body. And the trauma or the confusion in the body is created when we can do something or we have to do something. What we don't understand and the brains can't connect the information. You feel it in your emotions, but you don't have time to connect it with your limbic system, with your body or, you know, you read a lot example So you are feeding up one of the right side brain. You know the logic. You understand, you read, you have a lot of information, but you didn't take time to experience it with your body and emotions. So the experience can't fully connect. Yeah, but when you go to a tantra massage, you breathe, you move and you make special sounds which are very easy, and they are connecting you with the body. When you breathe more, you are bringing sensitivity and opening for feeling something. Because when we are stressed or tired or you become scared or you are in trauma response, the first thing that the body starts to do when the body doesn't want to feel it, is stop breathing. This is the first reaction of our protection of the body. So we are starting with the breathing to wake up the body, to bring the oxygen to the muscles. That the muscles get information, that they can relax, that they are safe, you know, that they can breathe slowly, you know, enough air and then the spasm and the body brain, the limbic system start to relax and make a space to bring things which the body didn't feel safe bring up because that was not the space for it. So then comes up some emotion which was stacked and held in the muscles because of the tension, because it happened. Example. You go to work and they tell you that you get kicked out and it's extremely important for you to keep this job, you know, and you get to shock and you start to breathe and you hold it. And if you are so lucky that you can go home or on the toilet or and you start to cry or talk to people or to your friends, eat ice cream, cry, scream, be angry. You will probably not have any of this tension. But if you don't have a space where you can go and express yourself and cry and you know, really feel it and breathe through the body, stay in, relax. Really, the muscles are in a relaxed stage where they can process it and then can send it to the logic brain when after this process of releasing of the shock, you can start to think about, okay, so what I will do now, what I will, you know, like how I will fix it, blah blah, blah, this step go to the bank. So then you connect it to all the three brains. But if you don't finish this circle, it's still staying in the body until the body feels again. Safe spot to release it. And tantra massage is one of the best for me. Wise How to release it, of course, especially the sexual topics because I really believe sexual energy is 50% of our life force.

I believe that too. Yeah,

you know, remember the moments when you become in love. You don't have to sleep. You don't have to eat, you know, like you are working like a crazy, you know, everything is perfect. Life is pink, you know, And then we start to take care about it and it goes down or away. But this is also what I like with tantra, that there are so many easy tricks on how to keep going so you can become in love every day to your partner, to the same partner.

So it's actually healing for relationships.

It's also healing for the relationship. But of course, both of them, they must be open to be vulnerable and work with themselves that way, to be open, feel and share the feelings. And this is what is creating intimacy. No sexuality. This is what creates the safe feeling to deal with our life, with the world, with our relationships. And this is why I love Tantra. It's really important if you decide to try the treatment, don't go for this erotic massage. It will totally destroy your perspective and view of tantra. It's many of them because it's better business. You know I can do it. I usually do one session, maximum two for a day. This is the maximum I can do to be there fully like this for the person. So this means that I can make five sessions in a week's example. But if you do erotica massages, you know you can do five for a day and for much more money and because it's just about getting the person to….

Yeah. Come and give him the fun

Exactly. Exactly. Yeah but but tantra it's not it's also fun but not the way our culture is imagining usually. So then my experience is that a lot of people start, they want to do tantra, but then they switch to erotic massages and things like that because otherwise they can't so well hold the business because you really need to have people with a lot of knowledge if they if they want to experience good tantra.

That's sad, though, because instead of healing yourself on a deeper level while having the fun, you just go for the fun. Like choosing that. This is pretty sad,

Daniela: 21: 35

You know, for some people who are really stuck that they see just sexuality like a devil thing. It can also be healing to have fun.it's not so easy. It's very tricky. But when people have a two hour session with me, they must count that we will spend three, 3.5 hours with me minimum, because when they come we need to share what they are coming for, what they want to experience, why they choose this and make it conscious, make a conscious. It means that I know fully about why I do it. We have many clients from erotic massages coming to us and those are one of the best clients because they tried all these erotic services and they feel used.

They feel like it's flat. They are like they are coming with the question like, hey, you know, so this is really the maximum I can get from sexuality. And they have a lot of question marks because they experience so many partners, so many example swingers parties and you know, things and they are open. They want to experience more, but they don't know how. They don't know how. They are very open and they know that they have to do something else than just play with the nipples and with the penis that it's like much more, much more what the body. And when they experience the first tantra massage, because usually my experience is that also people who go to erotic massage, they want just closeness. They feel just lonely when they feel the real closeness that people are meeting you with respect and love. And it's crazy when I say it because it's sexual, but it's not. Yeah. You know. So it's really intimate. It's not sexual. It's really very intimate. It's one thing where you can be sexual and, you know, just stimulate some points on the body and you can be sexual. It's quite easy to learn, but to build up intimacy, this is what we want, all of us.

What comes to mind is like the difference between a one night stand and a real intimate relationship. So it feels like one is a one night stand and the other one is a really good relationship.

You know, you cannot say again like, no, because 1s okay, you know, example, imagine when people go to have a one night stand. Imagine the scenery like that. You go, you drink, you have fun every Friday. You just pick some men, you take him home. You do what always, you know, you enjoy, you send him out. Morning. You know. And this is not very healing. This is not very deep intimacy and sexuality. But imagine that you go to the park or bar, you are not drunk, you are fully conscious. You meet the guy, you feel like that each centimeters of your body, it's vibrating. And you know, it's not matter if he's leaving tomorrow or if you will see him one more time, but you feel you are talking with him and you really feel how your body is relaxing and how you can feel safe, how you can say whatever. And he understands or he doesn't understand, but he doesn't say anything. He is just there. You know, and the same you do for him. And then you go after three, four hours home and you are kissing, taking slowly down the clothes. You know, he's telling you how you are beautiful. Yeah. He's so soft and nice and you have a lot of cuddling. You may cry. You can have emotional release. Maybe he will tell you some secret about which you know that it's real. He doesn't need to lie. You. You don't need to lie to him because maybe he's leaving tomorrow and you will never see him again because he's from New Zealand. I don't know. But you can meet and this can be very healing. That's a true example for women, who have never experienced anything like that. They go and have sex just every Friday on the toilet trunk. And if they have a one night stand like this, it can totally shift and change their life. they will feel like, oh my God, it can be like this, this is what I want. And they will start to search for something else.

That's a really good point. Thank you for making that point. If you come to me because it's something I've never experienced. So we always talk based on our experiences. Right? So this was beautiful

You can do many things and then you can be in relationships, you know, like 15 years where you do sex, how the partner won't you never fully enjoy. You cannot express yourself. You cannot say how you feel now, but it doesn't take care and you don't feel any intimacy and you are so traumatized after the relationship that a one night stand like this can heal you forever. So you know. Yeah, life is colorful. U1

True. In fact, I love this. I love the idea of getting without having to worry about giving in a tantra

massage. Yes. Yes, I love it. That's it. You have 100% fully focused on yourself. But when we are kissing and making love with somebody else, we don't have time to fully focus on ourselves. What makes us good? And we don't have also full time to focus for the other one what he really wants or she. But the tantra is about that one person giving and the second one is receiving. So you have full consciousness to give or take. And this is what makes it so I will say explosive. So new because you can digest it, you can process it, you can feel it. And everything is, of course, also slow, usually that you have really time for it to the body to feel it. This is the most important.

Wow, this was beautiful. How about the black group of Tantra? Did we talk about that ?

black group of tantra? It's a lot of techniques where you work with your like shadows, shadows, your kinks, your example, a lot of of Bdsm. Bdsm has also more categories than just one because people when you say Bdsm, you think that it's just, you know, like I don't know, a lot of pain and things like that, but you have difference between conscious and unconscious Bdsm and tantric Bdsm. So example, let's say that you can connect also with Shibori. You know that you have example but experience to trust somebody let control go, let it go control you know so example with tighten tighten up be like no slave but be under control of somebody in trustful safe place can be also healing. Yeah if you experience before something else and you couldn't I experience I was raped when I was 17. And I really didn't trust the men after that. I really couldn't lose the control in any way. Like I didn't drink. I was very, like, scared to go for a date or something like that. And thanks to the tantra where I learn how to say yes or no. To be very clear in that in safe space, it's like when you go and play and learn, play a tennis. If if you want to go and play on Wimbledon, you will not go in first game to play there. You will do training where you know how to hit, where you know how to catch. And this is the same with tantra that it can be very good like training field for to find out what you want, what you don't want if it's if it's made like the respectful coaching way. So you can really learn so much about yourself. And this was an example of my story that when I was receiving messages, first of all, I did it with women. I received the massage from women because I didn't feel safe with the man to do something so intimate because I had experience in my body that they will cross my boundaries when I say no. So it was not safe memory in my body for that because I didn't know really how to say no or, you know, I was not so strong in it. So I will probably have similar experiences. But when I did this training with the tantra massages and with the tantra really like a professional studio and really like professional school, then I learned all these kinds of things, what I want, what I don't want. And it was not sexual. It was more about crying, cleaning, healing, learning. Yeah. Also healing. And then when I felt strong enough, I went. Example experience the session with a man and I never forget the feeling when you have in your body how it is. It's a totally game changer when you experience something like that and you know that you said no and he fully respects it. And here we are again. You can of course meet a person like that partner in your life and experience it in your life naturally. But if it's not happening in your life, then it's the best field where you go and train yourself that you can change it, that it will start to happen in your life.

I understand. Wow. Thank you so much for sharing that.

Daniela: 31: 56

Of course, this is my part. This is why I am in love with tantra and why I want to spread it between as many people as I can. And many people tell my colleagues that I'm too serious about tantra. But I really love the healing part. Yeah. For me, sexual services do so many people. Yeah, it's not needed anymore and I need to be here for these people. They do the sexual services that they have where to come and heal after that.

How can someone prepare for a tantra massage?

Ooh, that is not possible to prepare. The only way you can prepare. It's like that. You go find out studios don't go anywhere where it's some naked picture or erotic picture. Okay? You know, like, where do you feel the erotic feeling from it? If you are starting with it, if you are really new and you want the experience, a very good example is one I have on my websites at the Codex because I am not just a tantra teacher, I am also a psychological body worker. And I think that if you do some kind of therapy or just coaching, there must be quite clear rules. Which you know what is okay and what is not. You know, like before you go there, before your brain just can read and digest it, feel safe in it. So definitely I will ask for rules. If I come to the place, I will again ask the therapist for rules on how they do it. If they don't have any rules, it's not tantra massage. Yeah. This is why people spend much more time with me during the session. Because in the beginning we talk for half an hour, one hour, just about how we will communicate, how they will tell me about the responders, what is okay for them, what is not, what they want to experience. And then I tell them what I will do in the central session, what I decided to do for them. If it's okay for them to do this kind of step. If they say yes, then I start to teach them and guide them through the session. Wow. And then after the session we have to go through and reflect on what they experienced once, what they learned, what they took from it, you know, and then they can go home.

I see

Also, usually some kind of homework. You know how to use it in normal life. It's very good that they can develop. So it's really like a never ending part. I will say, because I'm still going also for sessions by myself and learning all the time. I thought about how I am perfectly healed. And then I was pregnant and I had abortion in the fifth month. Wow. And I had totally new traumas. Yes. Connect to sexuality, intimacy. And I needed to start to work with it. And to be honest, I have worked with it the last five years in a very intense way. And it's opening another topic, which I was not aware of. So it's a never ending story. U2

Sorry, I'm so happy to hear that you laugh now about that. It means that you are okay with it. But again, I'm so sorry. I can only imagine what it feels like.

Yeah, it was. It was hard. Yes, it was very hard not really digesting for maybe five years, but thank God we are out of it. But this is, you know, but this is also the way that I like on tantra, because in our culture, we see many things that are happening to us like that we are the victims. But the truth in tantra perspective, and this is what I like, it's just about exams and each of the exams, it's showing you mirror to find out something new about yourself, who you are, what you can bring up in different kind of, you know, like situations, what you can feel, where you can go, what everything is possible. So in tantra, what I like the most, I will say it's that tantra is helping you to prepare for the life to be open and see it. Like I will not say positive because I felt all the anger and disappointment and all this kind of frustration and I felt it. I didn't feel that it's just a positive experience. But when you look at to the experience like what to learn from it about myself, where it's guiding me, you know, what I can do different, you know what I'm connecting with now, Thanks to this, it helps you much faster to deal with the periods of the life where it's not like the best for us, where we are not partying in pink, you know, like but with the campaign and everything is perfect. So this is also what I like about it. U2

That's, that's amazing. It feels like NLP, It's it's really amazing. It's healing on so many levels.

You know, for me, this is fun like for me one way. It's not matter if you do tantra or if you do, you know, different kind of like family constellation or some you know, I think that everybody who really wants to feel soon or later get also to the situations that they at tantra to their life. But many people you know like me are meeting a guy who is now my partner and he doesn't know anything about tantra, but he's totally tantric. Wow. Of course, many people, for example, don't need the tantra in their life because they have other challenges. So it's not like everybody needs tantra, all of us. We have different kinds of paths and something we get it like naturally and something not.

What do you mean by that? That he's totally tantric. What does it mean that someone is tantric?

38:49

I can share everything that is in me. And he doesn't react to it. Like the way. For example, I say, Hey, I am so tired today or so angry or I would like just to cry, you know? And he doesn't start to disturb it with the words or with some reaction the way like, Oh yeah, okay, let's go. You know, I buy, I don't know, cinema tickets and that you will feel better. Forget about it. Stretch yourself.

Or for example judgment. Yeah. When the second one is scared or you trigger some reaction in them, they don't know what to do with, you know, they start to like, oh my God, you know, you must be always in this mood, you know, like, I don't know what to do, you know? Or they start to react in different kinds of ways. For me, the tantric way, it's like that. You are there just with the person is beautiful.

So someone actually can be tantric while not knowing much about tantra.

Yes. A lot of people I meet are very tantric and they don't know about it. Wow. For me, tantra is wonderful. It's really healing for me. And I. And I don't want to say that Tantra, it's healing for everything. It's not. Some people need something else. But for me, it was my healing part. It still is. It is. It's like something not everybody needs for healing, but everybody loves it. Beautiful. And this is what I like. Beautiful. And couples.

You said that it can heal relationships. How can they start with it?

It's again, very different. You know, somebody is coming for workshops, which I have that they are starting with a workshop for a couple because it's not so intimate. There are more couples. They are always separate. You know that I explain some work or homework and they do it separately or some are coming for individual lessons that we are really concrete and focusing on their topics. Yeah, it depends. Again, if the topic is focused more about sexuality or intimacy, then you use different kinds of techniques. But let's say that most of the crisis and most of the people want to divorce, if they really the main thing is that both of them really want to because you can push the other one to change or try to do some steps, which is too painful for them or they don't want to experience. But if both of the people they really want, then you will believe me or not, I saved most of the marriage as couples and in crisis. I saved marriages by exercising so that they get the homework every day when they come home first. What they do is they have to sit and for ten minutes just breathe and look each other in the eyes. Wow. So simple. So simple. This is why I am saying that many people are so tantric and they don't know about it. Wow. But. But, you know, try to sit when you are angry at your partner, which just hurted you, of course, when you are in love. It's so simple. Yeah, it's so beautiful. I know where you're going with this. Yeah, but then imagine that you are two years in crisis. You are fighting about something. You know, he always hurts you with it, you know? And then you have to take his hand and go sit on the sofa and sit there ten minutes and watch and breathe together. You know, the first thing that couples make when they have a fight is that they disconnect by eye. They don't look at each other. And this is, again, when you want to connect, this is the first thing that you are supposed to do to see the other one. Because we disconnect and we close ourselves to our story and we are thinking about what everything is happening with him probably, and how he is bad and how he makes us angry. And we are so overtaken by this that we don't see how he is angry, how he is hurt or she. And this is what is creating the connection with the eyes. Wow. To see them. What is really happening with them in the body, that they are also crying. But here it's the question: are we strong enough, both of us, in the relationship, that when we need to cry, we will cry in front of the other one? Yeah. And this is the work which both of them need to be willing to do to feel their own pain. Because this is the only way you can be empathic and connect and feel the pain of others. So this is why I am saying that until I do tantra, I will never stop going for workshops and sessions by myself. Because I will become numb to focus just for other people.

You need to clean your own house as well

Like always. Always. So this is why it can be really healing. But some people will not go into it. I didn't. They will not choose it as the best technique for them. But if you do it right with the right dosage, it's really beautiful. It's really beautiful to connect with people like this.

How can someone learn more? Someone that knows nothing about tantra? Is there a place to start?

How in the world are there a lot of places? A lot of places are everywhere. But it's difficult for me to recommend somebody because then I feel like I am responsible for the recommendation.

But maybe a workshop like, would it be better to start with a book? With a workshop?

I can be selfish and I recommend my work. Perfect. But I can really really promise safe space on my workshops and my work so you can find out whether or not Daniela Torp dot know if you want Norwegian version in Norway if you want English when I travel example to London or Germany or somewhere else, then it's dot com and if it's Czech Republic, it's dot z CC and I do the same workshops, okay. But of course in different kinds of languages. So I have workshops for women, woman power, woman essence, how to connect with ourselves, with our power, with our sexuality.

Nice. Are they one day workshops,

usually two days of workshops. The one day, the one day workshop I have just how to please a woman, how to please a man. It's separate groups just for women or just for men, where we really learn techniques and anatomy and differences between men and women. That's interesting too. So it's. Yeah, it's more about sexuality, like really the first step, you know, to understand that, okay, our bodies really need different kinds of care. Yes. To really learn something, what we know, but we don't really know the details and tricks. Like we know that our bodies are different, but instead try to figure out and be inspired by it. We are trying to say that the second one, it's not sophisticated enough or, you know, we fight who is better. So here the workshops are about to understand that any of the body and any of the needs are not better or worse. It's just different. But one way is very similar. Yeah, it's just that we feel it just differently in the body. So this is a one day workshop and then it's this for women to really connect really deeply with this body, to understand how to communicate the emotions and what they want and what they don't want, how to play with their sexuality. Then we have the couple workshop, then I have a workshop for women after abortion, how to deal with it, how to digest it and everything. And one about the birth, how the women, how to connect with the body that you can give a birth easily. But I'm preparing now. I have to say, I feel like now I can say it from January. I am preparing a special thing for women which they can sign up for one year or each course is different and it will be the name. It's yeah, I argue. Oh it's just for women or trans. Women, of course, want to understand the point of the source. Amazing. And that you're doing this work. Yeah. Yeah. And it's really, really I'm really looking forward to it and you can find it in January on my website in a project which I opened in Oslo which is Academy of Sexuality and Intimacy Academy of sexuality and intimate that don't dot and oh and I was teaching shibori. But now we will exchange the Shibori for this woman project. And my main focus is really to understand how to take care of ourselves and women when they go through different kinds of periods in their life. And it will be very interesting. I think I'm looking for work.

I'm going to check more about it online. Wow. And people can get in touch with you through your website, right?

Yes. Or the Academy of Sexuality and Intimacy. That is also possible. I do my sessions there. Okay. And this space in the studio. So you can find me through Facebook or. But people have to know something about me. The best is really to do it through some email or call or message because I am connecting people with the body and it's very important for me to be connected with the body and I am horrible in social media and. Answering emails. You know, do all this kind of technical stuff for me, totally science fiction things. So I am very slow in that they can go on the website Danielle Dot and or the number by number is 91641159. And when I don't work, when I work, I am strictly turned off. And when I don't work, I get some calls or messages or something like that. Because for me, this world really is. Yeah, too far away. I love to live in real life and understand.

Thank you so much. Maybe any last short thoughts for someone who is new to tantra? Just a tip or something before we close this.

Yeah, start with tantra the way that you also by yourself stop to do everything for ten minutes of the day and just focus on your breathing and look around what is going on. Because this is the beginning of tantra and you will be in shock. How many things are happening? Wow, I'm going to do that. Definitely. Yes. Some call it meditation. I call it breathing. And because breathing is very important that you follow the breathing because this is really what is connecting you with your body, because this is if you are really focusing how you breathe in, how it's feeling up your body, and then you breathe out. And during that example, you can also sit and drink a coffee and you taste the coffee. You will figure out that coffee tastes totally different. For example, a lot of people start to smoke because they start to smoke consciously. Oh, which means that, you know, normally people smoke and they take one cigarette after another one. And they didn't even know that they smoke. But when you smoke and you really breathe in and breathe out, you figure out that you need instead, you know, like 20 cigarettes, five because you suddenly feel how strong it's strong, you know, that's So it's really easy. It's really easy. Just do it.

It's perfect. Thank you so much. And thank you for being here with us and for sharing so much.

Now it's your turn. Let us know what health and abundance subjects you want us to cover in the future. Do that by commenting on the post on Instagram. Thank you for listening and thank you so much to Daniella for being here with us today. If you liked it, please leave a review at Pod chaser.com. Just search for the podcast and write a good review. If you have questions or if you want to put a session with me, please do let me know on Instagram.

In the next episode, we'll be talking about Bdsm and the healing power behind Bdsm.

And remember you are always creating your health and abundance.

What do you choose to create today?